


Latching Onto You

by eeveepacini, molaspacini



Category: Degrassi, Degrassi: Next Class
Genre: AU Next Class S3 & 4, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, F/M, Gen, Multi, Parenthood, Pregnancy, What-If, bi frankie, mola and fresme, mola baby
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-25
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:48:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 52
Words: 142,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25497862
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eeveepacini/pseuds/eeveepacini, https://archiveofourown.org/users/molaspacini/pseuds/molaspacini
Summary: Lola's life is turned upside down after a spontaneous night with Miles. Meanwhile, Frankie finds an unexpected connection in the midst of chaos.A “what if?” AU beginning in Season 3 of Next Class.
Relationships: Frankie Hollingsworth & Lola Pacini, Frankie Hollingsworth & Miles Hollingsworth III, Frankie Hollingsworth/Esme Song, Miles Hollingsworth III/Lola Pacini
Comments: 74
Kudos: 56





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This first scene is a flash-forward — the next chapters will show how they got here!

Lola traced her fingers across the tight seam of her prom dress as she was helped out of the limo by Frankie. She had purchased the dress two weeks ago and it fit perfectly that day. At this point in her pregnancy, however, Lola was growing bigger practically every day. Her prom dress fit — but probably only for tonight. One magical night was really all she needed her prom dress for anyway… that was at least what she kept trying to tell herself. 

“Everything is perfect…” Frankie came up behind Lola, gripping her shoulders with enthusiasm. 

Lola observed her surroundings as she and her best friend walked up to the prom. For once, prom wasn’t being held in the smelly gym. Instead, the student council had somehow pulled off a beautiful fairytale themed prom in the woods. It was everything she could’ve dreamed of. She just wished she could be attending this event feeling like Cinderella rather than the pumpkin carriage she rode in on. 

“I don’t know about perfect.” Lola spoke, not quite self-assured. She thought that months of mental preparation and the perfect dress would be enough armor for her to get through the fear of judgment that was clouding over her prom excitement, but there was still just a mental block there. Despite being with her best friend, knowing that the love of her life was on the other side of that entrance warm and happy and ready to greet her, this moment was still scary. She had spent years dreaming of her perfect prom, and that ideal definitely didn’t include being in her third trimester. 

“Are you sure the dress looks okay?” Lola questioned, turning her body to the side and looking down self-consciously. She had asked that question dozens of times throughout the entire process of getting ready as well as when they took prom pictures, but she was still convinced that she looked ridiculous. 

Before Frankie could provide her usual dose of reassurance, another voice chimed in. Esme. “You look hot.” Esme spoke with her usual lack of decorum. “Anyone who talks shit about you, Lola, I’ll have their heads medieval-style.” She paused, looking to Frankie for approval. “...That’s the theme of the prom, right?” 

Frankie laughed, reaching over and straightening Esme’s tight midnight blue dress which had gotten slightly bunched up at her waist. “Uh, Fairytale.” She politely corrected Esme. “So… close, not quite.” 

“Same thing.” Esme shrugged. “Now come on, let’s go in!” She pranced toward the entrance excitedly, approaching Hunter and Yael who were taking tickets. “Look at the little outfits! I have to take blackmail pics.” Esme played with the fringe on Hunter’s costume and giggled. Hunter, of course, was less amused. 

Frankie smiled, following Esme for a moment before looking back to Lola. “Come on, Lo. I promise the scary parts are over. It’s prom time!”

The scary parts were definitely far from over for Lola. She still had a long road ahead of her. Frankie was right, though. Tonight was prom. This was something she had been looking forward to for as long as she could remember. Lola swallowed her anxiety like a gigantic horse pill and attempted to focus on the great things directly ahead of her. Everything else was tomorrow Lola’s problem. 

“Okay. Let’s go.” Lola decided out loud, squashing her fears and doing her best to leave her sense of fear at the front door. 

“You first, Lo. Your prince awaits.” Frankie said, motioning for Lola to walk ahead of her and Esme. 

Frankie and Esme’s steps were as coordinated as their dresses and corsages. Lola never would have guessed that Frankie and Esme would become such a seamless pair. When would she learn to stop being so shocked at the off-the-wall things that happened at Degrassi? Crazier things had happened after all — Lola and Miles ending up together with a baby, for one example. 

Lola, Frankie and Esme turned their prom tickets over and officially entered the event. Frankie excitedly pointed to a photo booth, which looked fun but was absolutely packed with Degrassi students. 

“We definitely have to make some memories tonight.” Frankie made note of the photo booth out loud to ensure that Lola knew it needed to be done. 

Way ahead of you, Lola thought. She was excited to make some memories, but she was also just antsy to reunite with Miles. She hadn’t seen him since they had taken prom photos at the cantina a couple hours earlier. The separation anxiety was starting to become real. 

Winston was the first person Lola recognized from across the crowd. “Lola, Frankie! Over here!” Esme scoffed at not being included by Winston, but Frankie quickly and quietly reassured her that it wasn’t intentional. The three girls walked across the dance floor and met Winston in the middle. 

“Where’s Miles?” Lola asked, her hand absentmindedly gravitating toward her stomach. Force of habit. “He said he’d meet me on the dance floor…” 

“Oh, he just needed to finish setting a few things up. Thanks for letting me steal him after prom pictures for some manual labor. This prom sure was a beast to set up… I swear, he was just right behind me…” Winston had begun rambling, which caused Frankie to set a hand on his shoulder. 

“Relax, Chewy. It looks beautiful.” Frankie said. “He’ll be here any second, I’m sure.” 

Lola stood in the middle of the dance floor and took in her surroundings. Big tents and twinkly lights, magic mirrors and tables with gorgeous place settings underneath gigantic chandeliers… “This really is perfect.” Her eyes caught on a big banner with the words ‘Happily Ever After’. That made her think of Miles and how far they had come. All she wanted was a happily ever after. 

“You’re perfect.” Lola’s favorite voice entered her eardrums. Miles Hollingsworth had officially arrived. 

She turned around quickly and met her tall, lanky Prince Charming face-to chest. Lola looked up and her eyes locked with Miles’. 

“Hello, my princess.” Miles spoke softly. He paused for a moment, then reached his hand down and placed it on Lola’s baby bump. “And good evening to our little royal baby.” His features twisted up into a giant, genuine smile, kissing Lola before pulling away and conjuring up something sparkly from behind his back. “This is for you.” 

Lola’s eyes widened as she examined what Miles was offering her. It was the most beautiful tiara she had ever seen — traditionally styled and silver with beautiful sparkling vintage diamonds and sapphires throughout. It looked like something royalty would wear. It also looked like it had to cost at least a thousand dollars. 

“I can’t take this.” Lola said, though her instincts and heart were screaming for her to grab it and put it on her head and dance around like a Disney princess. “It’s too much. You must have spent a fortune.” Miles’ family had money, but it didn’t mean Lola was comfortable with him throwing it around willy nilly for prom accessories. They needed to be responsible now. 

Miles shook his head, pulling Lola to the side of the dance floor to avoid drawing more attention than they already naturally had. “No, look at it. Don’t you recognize this tiara?” 

”Have you… shown it to me before?” Lola was honestly lost. She couldn’t keep her eyes off the tiara, though. Something about it was familiar now that Miles mentioned it. She had seen this tiara before. She just couldn’t quite place it. 

Miles reached into his pocket and pulled out an old, slightly tattered photograph. As soon as Lola laid eyes on it, she gasped. 

“It’s from your mom. She wore it to her wedding, her mother wore it to her wedding… I guess it’s considered like an heirloom or something?” Miles explained before handing the photo to Lola and allowing her to look at it more closely. 

Lola’s eyes fixated on the aged photograph of her mother and father at their wedding. She hadn’t seen this photo in years. At one point it sat in Lola’s family living room framed front and center. Lola used to stare at this photograph and the others from her parents’ wedding day and dream of the day that she got to wear a gorgeous dress and fancy jewelry and a tiara and have the happiest day of her life like her parents did. 

When Lola was little she would ask her parents or whoever babysat her to retell the stories that old family photos represented. She always liked the different ways that her family members remembered things — like how her abuelo could only recall the food served at the reception while her abuela could recite the vows nearly by heart. The way her father recalled this photo and others of her mother had always been young Lola’s favorite, though — he would always gush about how beautiful Lola’s mother looked and how lucky he felt to be by her side. Her parents were like a real life fairytale to Lola — until Lola grew up and had to discover fairytales weren’t real. 

Lola had grown to dislike family photos as the years passed and she watched her parents fall out of love. There was a point where Lola put the wedding photo away and neither parent ever seemed to notice or ask where it went. That was the moment she knew that the bond her parents shared had officially broken. How could you not want to constantly look back on the happiest day of your life? 

Now, though, she looked at that photo in a new light. It made her smile. Miles made her smile. He really knew her and loved her and accepted every single piece of her. Even though nothing was ever going to be perfect, Miles still made her feel like she was in a fairytale. Tears welled up in Lola’s eyes as she took the tiara into her hands and placed it on her head, not caring in the moment how much it messed up her perfectly styled prom hair. She was just happy to be here with the boy she loved so much.

“I didn’t know you could look more beautiful.” Miles spoke smooth as ever, placing a hand on Lola’s cheek and wiping away her happy tears. “Do you maybe wanna dance?” he asked, and Lola pulled him into a tight hug.

“Always with you.” Lola reached up and pulled the tiara off her head. “But first… can you fix my hair?” She knew it didn’t really matter, but something in her brain kept nagging about it. This night was turning out to be perfect after all. Her hair deserved to be too. 

Miles chuckled and took the tiara into his hands again. “Absolutely.” He smoothed out the ruffled hairs and placed the tiara perfectly on top of her head. Then, he placed a kiss on her forehead. “Now let’s dance. All three of us.” 

Lola couldn’t tell if she was feeling butterflies in her stomach or the baby kicking. Probably both. She allowed Miles to lead her onto the dance floor and wrapped her arms around his neck. “Happy prom, Miles Hollingsworth,” she whispered in his ear.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola finds support from an unexpected place after attempting to reach out to Miles following the results of her pregnancy test.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back! Thank you to everyone for the hits, comments and kudos — please continue to leave your thoughts and love in the comments and consider sharing this story with a friend if you’re enjoying it. Next chapter we get to start hearing a bit of Frankie’s POV along with some juicy Mola stuff... Hope you guys are half as excited as we are! ♡︎

“One Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi… four, five.” Lola spoke softly through the Degrassi bathroom stall to Frankie and Shay. “Now what?” Lola opened her eyes with a heapful of hesitation, allowing her gaze to drop to the pregnancy test that rested between her shaky fingers. No results yet. Obviously. 

“Lay the pregnancy test flat, I’ll set the timer.” Shay replied firmly. 

Lola nodded and obliged, more than glad to set the test out of sight for a minute or two. Out of sight, out of mind. Staring at the test wasn’t going to make the lines appear - or hopefully _not_ appear - any faster. 

Frankie spoke up, “Are you gonna tell the dad?” 

Your _brother?_ Lola thought, but didn’t say. The fact that Lola couldn’t even open up to her best friends about the circumstances that led up to her having to pee on a stick in the Degrassi girl’s bathroom was proof enough that no matter the test’s results, Lola being pregnant just wasn’t an option. Not to mention the fact that her baby’s father had a boyfriend… 

“There is no dad because there is no baby.” Lola responded succinctly, hoping to discourage her best friend from prying further. Part of her was also sort of hoping to speak her hopes into existence. Lola could not be pregnant. The universe just could _not_ do that to her right now. 

“What I meant to say was…” Frankie started, but Lola cut her off.

“I know. Can we talk about something else?” Lola asked, then tried to change the subject to celebrity gossip. Low hanging fruit, she knew, but she hoped her friends would humor her and play along for the next minute or two. Just long enough to get through the agonizing wait, then everything could go back to normal. 

After a moment without hearing a response, Lola peered from the cracks in the bathroom stall to see Frankie and Shay, now standing closer to one another and whispering. Lola couldn’t pick up every word they were saying from a few feet away, but a few select words clued her into what the girls were gossiping about: Lola. Of course. 

The longer she sat waiting and stewing, the more Lola felt like the stall walls were closing in on her. “How much longer?” She shifted on the toilet seat uncomfortably. She knew that she wasn’t technically confined, but there was something about this situation that made her feel like she needed a door of separation. Some sort of buffer, just in case she needed a moment to collect herself after reading the results that would soon reveal themselves. 

“A minute.” Shay replied loudly before retreating back to the private conversation with Frankie. This time accidentally loud enough for Lola to hear every word. “If that happened to me, I would die… if my parents didn’t kill me first.” 

Lola knew her friends meant well, but their support and concern was coming across a whole lot more like judgment whether they intended it to or not. Lola changed the subject once again, this time asking about history projects for a moment in an attempt to distract and fill time. That topic got more traction than the earlier celebrity gossip quip, but the conversation still faded before the timer Shay had set had a chance to go off. Counting down once again, this time with zero patience or chill, Lola reached her antsy fingers behind her and snatched up the pregnancy test...

Positive. The test was _positive_. Something in Lola knew that was coming, but it still shocked her to her core to see the results in plain lettering. 

Knowing her friends were on the other side of the stall door eagerly awaiting Lola’s test results, Lola stepped out of the bathroom stall with as cool of a demeanor as she could pull together. All she needed to do was keep it together for a few minutes, then she could completely freak out. 

“So… are we planning a baby shower?” Frankie asked, her face looking slightly twisted with a mix of concern and faux positivity. 

“Most definitely not.” Lola responded, trying to sound as decisive as she could. Frankie and Shay pulled Lola into a hug, instantly relieved and more than willing accepting Lola’s answer as the truth. Lola wasn’t technically lying. There was no way she could keep this baby alone, and alone seemed like her only option. 

“I knew everything was going to be okay.” Frankie assured her. If things were in fact actually okay, Lola thought, Frankie’s words would probably be super comforting. However, the positive pregnancy test she concealed in her hand told an entirely different story. And if she didn’t figure this out soon, her whole life was going to be telling a different story. One that she was in no way prepared for. 

“We should get to class.” Shay said with a smile on her face. 

Frankie agreed, gathering her things from the bathroom sink. 

“I just...I need a minute, okay?” Lola replied. 

Her friends accepted that, clearly not detecting that Lola’s problem was most definitely not solved. For once Lola was happy to be the blip off of everyone’s radar. “Congrats on being not pregnant!” Frankie chirped on her way out, and Lola used every last bit of emotional energy she had to keep a smile on her face. Just until they left the bathroom, then she could lose the facade. 

As soon as the bathroom door shut behind Frankie and Shay leaving Lola in the bathroom alone, the corners of Lola’s eyes began to fill with tears. She held the positive pregnancy test to her face again. What was she going to do?

...

Three days had passed and Lola still had no real plan. Even worse, outside of Lola’s internet history, her dog Fernando and her Magic 8 Ball, nobody else in the world knew she was pregnant. Lola knew she wasn’t handling this right, but how was a sixteen year old supposed to? Everything she read online said to reach out to friends and find a support system, but who was going to support her once they found out she was pregnant with Miles’ baby? She’d be a martyr. A single, pregnant, friendless martyr. 

Lola shifted uncomfortably as she stood against a set of lime green lockers waiting for Miles to exit class. Maybe if she just talked to him, not even about the pregnancy, she could get some clarity on how he was feeling and it would help her make a decision on what her next step should be. All she knew was that continuing to keep things to herself was only going to hurt her. 

The bell rang and classroom doors began opening. Miles was one of the first ones out. His eyes fell on Lola and he immediately looked as if he would rather see anyone else. _That_ stung. 

“Can we…” Lola started shyly, her voice almost too quiet for Miles to hear. 

Not that it seemed like he was listening, anyway. He was avoiding eye contact, looking above Lola’s head and scanning the hall. 

“Can we talk somewhere?” Lola tried again, this time with more power in her voice. She knew that they couldn’t be romantic with one another or even get too close in public, but he could at least give her human decency and not ignore her. 

Miles glanced down, finally focusing for a moment on Lola and allowing his gaze to linger on different parts of her face. He _definitely_ paused for a moment to stare at her mouth. For that few seconds, Lola almost felt a fraction of their old spark return. She wondered if Miles felt it too. Maybe that was why he backed away, leaning his tall, lanky body awkwardly against a locker keeping a safe distance away from Lola. 

He observed his surroundings again, probably trying to make sure nobody who could get the wrong idea was watching, then he finally spoke. “What’s up?” Miles asked. 

“This isn’t really something I want to talk about...here.” Lola said, swirling her finger in the air in reference to the chaotic and congested halls of Degrassi. “I’ve got a spare period... don’t you?” She pretended she didn’t remember Miles’s entire schedule, but she knew it like the back of her hand. “Can’t we go somewhere, just for like an hour? No funny business, I swear. I just want…” Lola paused. She didn’t want to give Miles the chance to back out. She needed to make it clear that this was important. “No, I _need_ to talk to you.” 

Miles’s eyes had been focused on the ground, but they darted back up for a moment, examining Lola with confusion and concern. “Hey, Miles!” A voice interrupted, nearly causing Lola to jump out of her skin. Zoe Rivas approached, eyeing Lola with a mix of caution and contempt. 

“Grace just texted me, apparently Simpson needs to go over the contents of the play ASAP. Why don’t you get that out of the way before you head to the hospital to visit Tristan?” Zoe looked at Lola pointedly as she mentioned Tristan. As if Lola could have possibly forgotten that Tristan existed. 

Taking this as an opportunity to escape and avoid his problems, Miles immediately obliged. “Right. Let’s go. I’ll talk to you later, Lo.” He paused, registering the accidental act of familiarity he had committed by using Lola’s pet name and feeling the need to remedy it. Awkwardly. “-la. _Lola_. I’ll, uh… talk later, okay? Play emergency. I’m sure you understand.”

“Wait!” Lola called out as Miles began to walk away. “I helped _write_ I.M Hope… If there’s a problem, shouldn’t I be involved too?” Truthfully she didn’t really care to sit in on some boring meeting with Simpson. She wasn’t going to allow Miles to push her away, though. Especially not now. She just needed a few minutes alone with him. No distractions, no eavesdroppers, no Zoe, no Tristan, just Miles and Lola. 

“Zoe… five minutes?” He asked. 

Zoe reluctantly obliged, backing up a few feet but keeping an eye on the conversation.

“What could be so important, Lola? You know that we’re not supposed to hang out outside of the play.” Miles spoke hastily. “Zoe has been giving me loads of crap about you and I just can’t hear it today...” 

“It’s none of her business.” Lola responded. “I just need to talk to you.”

“She doesn’t care if it’s her business or not.” Miles said. “It’s Zoe. She’s never cared about that. All she knows is that her best friend’s boyfriend keeps disappearing to spend time with someone who isn’t him. She’s not happy with me.” 

Lola sighed. She didn’t need to be reminded that she wasn’t wanted. He was finally giving her a minute of his time, but he still wasn’t listening. “I’m going through something really hard right now, Miles. I really just need to talk to someone about this.” Lola said. 

Miles shook his head and put a shaky hand to his forehead. “I can’t be the one who listens to all of your problems anymore...” He trailed off, distracted by an alert on his phone. “I’m sorry. I gotta go. Maybe talk to Frankie or someone?”

Lola exhaled sharply as she watched him walk away, wiping the beginnings of tears from her eyes before they had a chance to mess up her mascara. She knew that getting understanding and support from Miles during this time wasn’t going to be easy, but this conversation had only driven more of a wedge between them. She leaned up against a set of lockers for a moment, wanting to collapse and slide onto the floor and lay there in defeat. 

“Are you okay?” Zoe intruded once again, her voice popping into Lola’s eardrums unexpectedly, causing her to flinch. “Sorry. I was watching.” 

“I know you were.” Lola responded, skipping the usual chipper tone she spoke with. She didn’t have energy for that today. “And no, I’m not.” 

Zoe seemed taken aback by Lola’s lack of niceness. “I couldn’t hear whatever you guys were talking about, just so you know. No privacy breached.” 

Lola narrowed her eyes. “No privacy breached?” She shot back. 

Zoe and Lola never got along particularly well, mostly due to Zoe’s horrible attitude and past self-serving behavior. Her recent attempts to guilt Miles away from Lola had only managed to sour Lola’s feelings toward Zoe more. 

“You were like, two feet away.” Lola spoke with a voice barely above a mumble. 

“I’m protecting my friends. I don’t know what you and Miles are doing, but something is off.” Zoe spoke boldly, then looked around sheepishly, seeming worried about people listening in. “Just let him help Tristan heal, Lola. Please. There are plenty of other guys at Degrassi.” 

“You don’t know anything about what’s happening!” Lola exclaimed defensively. She hated the way holding a secret like this was making her feel. Anxious, guarded, uncomfortable… it was all negative, and Lola hated negative. Negative made her stomach hurt. She didn’t want to feel this way for another day, let alone nine whole months. “If you had just let me talk to Miles for five minutes I could have…” Lola stopped herself.

She wasn’t even sure what she was going to say if she got alone with Miles. Days of agonizing and researching and practicing, and she was still winging it when she approached him. Maybe this was just an impossible situation. Maybe it was better if he just never knew. 

Zoe waved her hand in front of Lola’s face, bringing the blue-haired girl back to reality. “You could have what?” She asked. “Whatever it is, Lola, I’m sure it’s not that bad.”

“I’m pregnant.” The words escaped Lola’s mouth loudly and clumsily. Lola’s hands immediately clasped onto her mouth with shock. She couldn’t believe she had said it out loud, and to Zoe Rivas of all people. Her brain and body must have been tired of holding it in. 

Zoe took a step back, clearly shocked. “You’re…” She took a moment to process, blinking rapidly and looking Lola up and down. A mix of realization and disappointment played across Zoe’s features as she fully connected the dots. “Miles.” She said. “You’re… with Miles’...” The keywords _pregnant_ and _baby_ refused to escape Zoe’s lips. Lola understood. The words didn’t come easy. “Are you okay?”

“I don’t know what to do.” Lola admitted. “I thought if I talked to him I’d be less confused, but he doesn’t have time for a conversation, let alone a crisis. Maybe it’s better if he just doesn’t know at all...” 

“You need to try again. Talk to Miles.” Zoe urged, taking Lola by surprise. “You’re right, it’s not ideal, but he deserves to know. I can set up a private meeting.” Zoe’s tone and attitude was unlike anything Lola had observed in the years the two had been in one another’s social circles. For once, Zoe just seemed to want to help. 

“Why aren’t you like… mad at me for this?” Lola asked, allowing herself to question the strange occurrence. 

Zoe, hesitant to open up, let the words hang in the air for a moment and contemplated, then began opening up to Lola. “My mom didn’t really give my dad a choice... or even a _chance_ when it came to having me. She didn’t tell him I was conceived. Now, obviously I don’t know much about my dad or whether or not he would’ve wanted me or not, but… I know Miles. I know he would want to know. And he definitely deserves to know, no matter what you decide to do. I just don’t want you to go through something this big alone.”

“What about Tristan?” Lola responded, posing the question she didn’t want to ask. Zoe’s words were bringing great comfort and doing a lot to make Lola feel like she wasn’t alone, but this situation was more complicated than a simple conversation. “Miles doesn’t even have time for a five minute conversation in the hallway, let alone doctor’s appointments and baby mama drama and whatever else could come with… this.” Lola motioned to her still-flat stomach as if the pea-sized thing inside of her was already producing a sizable bump. “This is the last thing he needs. It’s just more drama.” 

“This isn’t drama, Lola. This is a _baby_.” Zoe spoke seriously in a hushed tone. 

There weren’t many students left grazing the hallway, but there was still great potential for eavesdroppers so the two girls had to watch their volume. 

“Look, it’s your decision. It’s your body. It’s your… you know…” _Baby._

“But technically and biologically speaking, it’s his too. If this were just some random stranger who knocked you up, someone who didn’t really care about you, I’d say it’s none of his business. But Miles cares about you. We both read his play. You were his Hope. I love Tristan, but I can’t act like you didn’t help Miles through the worst time of his life. I just don’t want to see him self-destruct if he were to ever find out later on. I think the guilt of not being there for you through something like this would really mess him up.”

Zoe’s words brought a lot of comfort to Lola. It wasn’t what she was expecting at all, but it was exactly what she needed. “You said you could set up a private meeting or something?” Lola said meekly. 

“I can set that up in the next few days.” Zoe said.

“Thanks, Zoe.” Lola replied, allowing a slight smile to creep onto her face for the first time in what felt like days. It wasn’t much, but every little bit of levity helped raise Lola’s spirits at the moment. “Should we... hug or something?” She added sheepishly, unsure of how to proceed after the unexpectedly sweet moment between the estranged pair. 

“Do you… _need_ a hug?” Zoe responded, seeming to be reluctantly willing to provide the action if really needed. 

Lola thought for a moment, then scrunched her nose and smiled faintly again. “Nah... too weird.” Lola replied, and Zoe let out a joking sigh of relief.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frankie tries to deny the things people are beginning to say about Lola and Miles. Lola finally gets a chance to talk to Miles alone face-to-face.

“I’m not _crazy_ , Shay.” Frankie projected her voice over the constant noise in the Degrassi cafeteria, pausing to take a bite of her sandwich. “Grace likes every single thing Jonah posts on his Hastygram now. Girls don’t like everything a guy posts unless they’re trying to say something. She’s sending subliminal messages!” 

“I don’t really think Grace is like that.” Shay spoke with her usual reasonable and measured tone.

“Like what?” Lola chimed in. Frankie had noticed her unusual quietness, but figured she’d give her shaken friend a chance to breathe and recover. It had only been a few days earlier that Lola thought her whole life was about to flip upside down. She’d return to her old carefree bubbly self soon enough. 

Frankie echoed Lola’s comment, curious what Shay was describing. “Yeah, like what?”

Shay shrugged her shoulders. “I dunno, a boyfriend stealer? She doesn’t really seem like the type. You have to be pretty low to even consider trying to get with someone who’s happily taken. It’s calculating and inconsiderate. I just don’t see it in Grace. My vote is they're just friends. My next vote is that we move on to any subject other than Jonah.” 

Frankie whined a bit but conceded. Jonah had been the hot topic for almost a week now, but it wasn’t necessarily because she always _wanted_ to talk about him. Things were just… off between the three friends. More specifically, between Shay and Frankie with Lola. Conversations just sort of dried up whenever Lola was around. Lola’s usual extroverted nature seemed like it was being slowly sucked out of her body. Her voice was quieter and less assured, her contributions to conversations were minimal and more often than not, Lola would end up bailing before a conversation was over. Frankie couldn’t help but feel like there was something Lola was withholding. 

Taking another big bite of her tuna salad sandwich, Frankie turned to Lola and attempted to softly appeal to her friend. “Anything new and interesting in your life, Lo? You haven’t tweeted in like, two days. I’m so used to a constant stream of #LolaThoughts.” 

Lola recoiled slightly, then pulled her phone out of her pocket. “I’ve been really busy with the play... This is actually Zoe now, apparently there’s some emergency meeting. I’ll catch you guys in Mandarin class.” Before Frankie had a chance to interject, Lola had transformed into a blue-haired blur, exiting the cafeteria without another word. 

Frankie put her hand to her mouth, exhaling and smelling her breath. “Okay, it was definitely at least partially the tuna salad breath.” Frankie admitted to Shay, then leaned in and attempted to share the unpleasant smell with her giggling friend. “But there’s something else going on… right?”

“Do you think it’s drama with the baby’s dad?” Shay didn’t waste time getting to the real questions. 

Frankie reminded Shay, “There is no baby, remember? Lola told us the test was negative.” 

“I meant the guy she slept with. Potential baby dad.” Shay clarified. “Whoever he is. Maybe he found out about the pregnancy scare and got mad.” 

“Lola wouldn’t sleep with a jerk like that.” Frankie said. “Especially losing her virginity.” 

A familiar face strolled past, plopping himself down at the lunch table. “Who’d Lola sleep with?” 

“You didn’t hear that, Hunter.” Frankie said. 

“Not my fault you suck at volume control.” Hunter taunted, stealing a bag of chips from in front of Frankie and snagging a few for himself. “You might as well fill me in since you’re already exploiting your friend’s private drama for gossip fodder.” 

“I’m not… exploiting… shut up!” Frankie quickly lost the argument. “There’s nothing to tell anyway. You heard wrong.” 

Shay interjected, taking the opportunity to probe Hunter for possible information. “Did Lola sleep with Baaz?” Frankie slapped her friend’s arm to chastise her. 

After about thirty seconds of watching Hunter crack up at the thought, the whole table was in understanding. Clearly, the answer to that question was no. 

“I already figured something weird was happening with one of you guys. The other day Lola was all weird asking me about how my parents would react if I got Yael pregnant. She said she was researching pregnancy stuff for a friend or something like that. I didn’t think that much of it because I got, uh… distracted with other things.” Hunter’s words trailed off. What was that about? 

“Wait, she was asking how your parents would react?” Shay inquired, seeming like she was onto something. “To a pregnancy?” 

Hunter raised a brow. “Yeah, like if they’d be mad or whatever. Pretty sure any parent would be pissed if their kid came home pregnant. God, can you imagine how Dad would react?”

Frankie really didn’t want to do that. If she came home pregnant, their father would likely never look at her the same. All of the progress their family had made, the amends their father had been trying to make over this past year, that’d all be wiped away by something huge like this. Their father had gotten slightly better with his anger and the family as a whole had gotten a teensy bit more well adjusted with the help of a lot of therapy. All the therapy in the world wouldn’t hold up against the disappointment and rage that Frankie imagined coming out of their father if a baby bomb dropped. 

“Lola _has_ been spending a lot of time on the play…” Shay said, her tone hinting toward something. 

Frankie thought for a moment. “No… you don’t think… _Jonah_?” She put a hand over her mouth. She had focused so much on Grace, maybe she was blind to a threat even closer to home. It wouldn’t be the first time that Lola and a boyfriend of Frankie’s had withheld a secret affair of sorts. That ancient situation revolved around a school production as well. Frankie’s brain said no, but her trust issues genuinely considered the idea. 

“No, idiot.” Hunter flicked Frankie’s forehead. “She’s talking about _Miles_. Are you actually dense?” 

Miles and Lola being together was absurd to Frankie. It wasn’t that they couldn’t go together, they were just too different. It didn’t click. “Nah. They’re friends, but it’s not more than that.” Frankie said, pretty sure of her answer. “They’re co-leads of the play. Lola just left for an emergency play rehearsal. They’re just two friends, working hard on the school play…” The more Frankie spoke, the more she was sounding like she was trying to rationalize. 

“And Miles is picking up shifts at the cantina.” Shay added. “That’s a whole lot of extra time together for friends.”

“Why are you pushing this insane theory?” Frankie snapped back a bit defensively. Miles and Lola weren’t sneaking around behind her back. She would know if something was going on, especially something so intense that it would lead to sex and a pregnancy scare. “It’s not Miles. He has a boyfriend, remember?” 

Shay didn’t seem fully convinced. Likely sensing Frankie’s emotions getting a bit high, she backed off. “You’re right. It was probably just some random guy. I just don’t get why she won’t open up to us about this.” Shay sighed, then glanced over to Hunter who was still happily munching on Frankie’s chips. “Me and Frankie. Not you.” 

“Maybe it was her ex.” Hunter shot back, causing Shay to scoff. “I’d say Tiny and Miles are the most likely suspects. Much more likely than Baaz’s perma-virgin ass.” Hunter laughed at his own joke. “Just my two cents, though.” He snatched up the bag of chips that he had lifted from Frankie. “I gotta go find Yael and grovel for forgiveness. Wish me luck.” 

Frankie rolled her eyes at her brother, shooing him away from the cafeteria table. “Thanks for nothing, geek.” She said to the back of her twin brother’s head. “It’s not Tiny.” She reassured Shay, who was visibly annoyed by Hunter’s suggestion. “Just like it’s not Miles. It’s just some random guy, and she’ll tell us all of the details when she’s ready.”

“I hope so.” Shay stated simply, not interested in giving credence to the theory that Lola had gotten pregnant by Tiny. “I just wish she’d talk to us so we’d know for sure.”

,,,

Lola was sitting in the cafeteria with Frankie and Shay at lunch when she got a text from Zoe about an emergency rehearsal. As much as the thought of seeing Miles made her nervous, she was kind of happy to have an excuse to leave the table. The smell of Frankie’s tuna salad sandwich was making her seriously nauseous. The internet said it was called food aversion, apparently common in the first trimester. The fact that her body was already changing scared her — it meant she was running out of time to make a decision.

She was the first to arrive at the auditorium. That was unusual. She sat down on the stage for a second, hugging her knees and trying to think what she was going to say to Miles. They obviously couldn’t talk about this in front of Jonah and Grace, but she still needed to talk to him sometime. And soon.

As if he could read her thoughts, Miles walked in just at that moment. He looked cranky and tired, and not especially happy to see her. Admittedly, that hurt. At a certain point Lola had gotten used to seeing his face light up whenever she walked into the room. “Where’s everyone else?”

“I don’t know. Late, I guess,” Lola mumbled. Speaking of late... “Um, do you think we could maybe talk about...”

Her phone buzzed before she could finish. A text from Zoe popped up on her lock screen: _Auditorium is all yours for the next hour. You’re welcome._

So that’s what this “emergency rehearsal” was. A classic Zoe Rivas scheme. Oh god, Lola was not ready for this. She thought she had more time. “There’s no play emergency,” Lola said.

Miles just looked at her, confused. “Huh?”

“The emergency text... Zoe made it up. To get us to talk. Alone.”

“Are you kidding?” Miles said. And Lola could tell he thought the idea was ridiculous. Like he didn’t even believe her. “I can’t get within five feet of you without Zoe breathing down my neck. Why would she lock us in a room together?” Miles paused, taking a moment to evaluate Lola’s expression and seeming to see how stressed she was. “Look, I know I’ve been... distant. And I’m sorry, Lo, I really am. But I have to be. We can’t be caught hanging out together, now that Tris is awake. Do you get that?”

Maybe it was the way he was talking to her like a child, or maybe she just couldn’t take another second of keeping this secret, but something inside Lola snapped. All the careful rehearsals she’d done in front of her mirror were forgotten. “Miles, I’m pregnant!” 

Miles was frozen. They both fell to a silence, and Lola couldn’t make out his expression. He just stared straight ahead, like his mind wasn’t even here anymore. “You’re...” he tried, but he couldn’t seem to form a complete thought. “You’re... what now?”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola and Miles come to a decision about their current situation.

Miles was frozen. They both fell to a silence, and Lola couldn’t make out his expression. He just stared straight ahead, like his mind wasn’t even here anymore. “You’re...” he tried, but he couldn’t seem to form a complete thought. “You’re... what now?”

“Pregnant. Yeah.” Lola hated saying it out loud. It made things so _real._

“Are you sure?” 

“Unfortunately, yeah. I mean, I haven’t been to a doctor or anything yet, but the test was positive and I haven’t gotten my period in over a month, so I think it’s pretty safe to say...”

Miles’ eyes lingered on her stomach for a second, like he was replaying the events of that fateful night between them, trying to remember how they’d gotten here. “So, it’s... mine,” he said. “Right?”

“Of course it’s yours,” Lola said, almost a little hurt. Miles knew that their time together was her first time, and she wasn’t about to go sleep with someone else right after. She didn’t trust anyone else like she’d trusted Miles.

“Sorry, I just need to...” Miles turned away from her and barfed right into the trash can. Lola’s stomach churned. Shouldn’t their roles be reversed here? He let out a loud breath, then sat down next to her, still pale. She didn’t think she’d ever seen him look this nervous.

“What are we going to do, Lo?” Miles said. His eyes were softer now as he used his pet name for her. Lola just looked at him for a minute, suddenly reminded of the Miles she’d fallen for. Gentle, caring— misguided at times, but always coming from a genuine place. In their short couple of months together, she’d opened up to him more than almost anyone. About her issues with her mom, how she worried about her dad, how she hated being treated like the dumb one of her friend group... “I mean, we can’t have a baby,” he added.

“I know...” Lola sighed. “That’s why I’ve been trying to talk to you.”

“I’m sorry for avoiding you,” Miles said, and he looked like he meant it. “Really. I do miss you. It’s just complicated with Tristan. The pressure I’m under, it’s…”

“It’s okay, you don’t have to explain,” Lola cut him off. “I know you’ve got more important things going on.”

“You’re important.”

Lola froze at those words. She wasn’t sure anyone had ever said them to her before. _You’re important_. But that still couldn’t be enough. “Look, I know staying pregnant isn’t an option. It... it doesn’t make sense. And it wouldn’t be fair to you. But I just wanted to talk to you before-”

“Wait,” Miles said. Lola couldn’t read his expression. “Is that what you want? An abortion?”

Lola just shrugged. The truth was, she didn’t know what she wanted. She’d stayed up late every night this week tossing and turning, agonizing over this decision, researching her options on her phone. Ending the pregnancy made sense, she told herself, given how young they were and the insanely complicated circumstances. But… there was also a part of her that couldn’t quite let go. That wondered what if. “It doesn’t matter. I can’t raise a baby alone.”

“But you’re not alone.” 

“Miles...”

“Look, I don’t- I’m not ready to be a dad. A baby is probably the last thing either of us needs, _especially_ right now. So if that’s what you want, I’m cool with it.” 

“Okay…” Lola said. There, she knew how Miles felt. So that was the decision, right? But… she sensed there was a but coming.

“But…” Miles started, and Lola’s heart sped up. He sighed. “I don’t want you to do that just because of me,” he continued. “Or because you think I wouldn’t be there for you. I know I’m still with Tristan and all. But I won’t leave you alone in this. I couldn’t forgive myself for that.” He took a long pause. “So, I guess…tell me what your gut says.”

“My gut says...” Lola closed her eyes for a second, still processing all that Miles had just said. She still didn’t feel at all ready to be a mom. But Miles being here, reassuring her he wasn’t going to walk away just like everyone else in her life had... it did something to her. It brought up that feeling she’d been trying to dismiss as a silly fantasy. The idea that she could actually do this, be a better parent than her mom. 

If she had been in this situation with anyone else, there would be no way she’d consider going through with it. But this wasn’t just some random one-night stand— it was Miles. Now that she knew he actually cared, that she wouldn’t be alone in this, she just couldn’t quite let go of that little piece of hope that maybe, just maybe they could do this. “My gut says I’m not ready to give it up,” she said, and the words surprised even her.

Miles just sat there for a second, not saying anything. “Okay...” he finally responded. He looked like he was having trouble breathing, his face pale and his palms trembling. “Okay, then.” He pulled her into a hug suddenly and gently rubbed her back. Lola couldn’t tell if he was holding her to comfort her or because he was about to fall apart himself. “I’m going to have to figure out how to tell Tristan eventually. But for now, can we just keep this between us?”

“Yeah,” Lola nodded. “Trust me. I don’t need anyone else to know right now.” She slowly pulled away so she could look him in the eye. 

The gravity of her decision set in as she looked at him and for a second, she almost wanted to take it all back. This was real now, and it was terrifying. “I’m scared.” Lola admitted. 

“Me too,” Miles said, and he definitely meant it. 

He pressed his palm to his temple. “A _baby_... man. Leave it to me to make things even more complicated…”

Lola shook her head. “So, what now?”

“Well, we should probably make you a doctor’s appointment. I mean, right?”

“Yeah, I guess so.” She laid a hand over her stomach and sighed. It seemed impossible that there was a tiny life growing in there, half her and half Miles. The thought of getting huge, of having a real, living, breathing human in a few months was unimaginable. There was no getting around it, this was going to change everything in their lives forever. She froze suddenly, realizing something. “Oh my god. How are we gonna tell Frankie?”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola and Miles spend some time together and bond after their first doctor's appointment.

Lola and Miles managed to get a doctor’s appointment a week later, but the only time slots available were during school hours. They had both called out of school this morning. Miles had pretended to be Lola's father on the phone with Simpson, and was surprisingly decent at impersonations. He'd had practice, he told her. She made a mental note to ask him to expand on that later. 

Lola had never really skipped class like this before, but she felt like this was way more important than sitting through chemistry. Frankie and Shay would be suspicious, but she’d deal with that later. 

Right now, the only real thing on her mind was the doctor confirming what she’d already known, that she was definitely knocked up. Almost two months pregnant, meaning the baby would be due in the summer. So much for swimsuit season. She still had absolutely no idea how she was going to break the news to her dad. Or Frankie. Or anyone, really. She was still having a hard time processing it herself.

"So at least we know for sure now," Lola said to Miles in the car afterwards. She laughed softly under her breath. "I'm officially a statistic. A teen mom.”  
Miles shook his head, but gave her a tiny smirk. His hand trembled as he fumbled around the drink holder, like he was reaching for a joint. He didn't smoke anything anymore though, at least as far as Lola knew. "You okay?" she eyed him.

"Yeah," Miles said. "It's just. You know, a lot to take in." He stared straight ahead at the road for a second. "Hey, what would you say about cutting the rest of our classes this morning? I need- I just, I need to clear my head."

"You can just drop me off if you want to go for a drive..."

"No, I don't want to be alone. I mean, I do. But, I mean, I want to be alone with you." Lola's body stiffened up. _Alone_ alone? Miles met her eyes and backtracked a little. "I didn't mean like, get-you-in-my-bedroom-again alone. I just meant... like old times."

Those "old times" were exactly how they'd gotten into this whole situation, Lola thought to herself. But when she looked at Miles' eyes and soft smile, she couldn't help but nod, _yes_. 

She'd missed their talks too. He'd been her rock for a while. And she needed a rock now more than ever.

"Yeah," Lola said softly. She lingered on his eyes for a second longer, and for just a brief moment there, she could feel herself getting lost in them, getting pulled into his world again. She made herself snap out of it and forced a smile. "That'd be nice."

They couldn't think of any other place to go, so they drove to the Hollingsworth house. The twins were at school and Miles' mom was away for a couple of days on a trip, so the coast was clear. 

It was odd being in the house just the two of them like this. Grade 9 Lola would have killed for the opportunity. But this wasn’t exactly the fantasy she’d dreamed of, her being pregnant and him technically having a boyfriend still. 

"So..." Miles said as they walked in.

"I'm starving," Lola suddenly declared. She really was. Pregnancy was doing weird things to her appetite— either she couldn't hold down anything but toast, or she wanted to eat everything in sight.

"Well, then, let me cook you something. What do you want?"

"You cook?" Lola blurted out. 

"I mean. I can manage to throw dinner on the stove without burning the house down. Most days," Miles shrugged. He wandered into the kitchen and Lola followed him. She glanced around at her surroundings, suddenly reminded of their whole avocado face-masks-in-the-kitchen scene the night their baby was conceived. "Lo?"

Lola snapped out of her trance. "Huh?"

"I said, what are you craving?" 

"Umm..." Lola thought for a moment. "Pancakes," she decided with a smile. 

Miles grinned and tossed on an apron. "Coming right up."

Lola sat at the counter and watched him whisk the ingredients together. "If I had known you could cook, I would have stuck you on kitchen duty at the Cantina," she teased.

"I liked being a busboy," Miles said. “I was better at that than being a waiter, that’s for sure.” He put the whisk down. "Um, I wanted to ask you something."

Lola raised her brow. "Mhm?"

"Er, how exactly did this..." he glanced pointedly at her stomach, "...happen?"

Lola looked at him, confused. "Uh?"

"I know how we made a baby, Lola. I just mean, how did... weren't you on the pill? I thought you said..."

"I did say," Lola said. "And I was." Suddenly, she didn't feel very hungry anymore. "I screwed up taking my pills. It was my fault."

"Oh." Miles paused, absorbing this. He didn’t look angry or anything, much to Lola’s relief. "Well. Not all your fault. I didn't use protection." He met her eyes and softened his expression. "And it does take two to tango. As the kids say."

Lola eased up. “It's too early for you to make dad jokes.”

Miles' smile suddenly disappeared. He turned his attention back to the bowl of ingredients, then went to flick the griddle on.

Lola frowned. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing. I guess I just thought about dads. And my dad." He poured the batter onto the griddle and watched it sizzle.

Lola immediately regretted the dad jokes remark. She'd completely forgotten how triggering the subject of his dad was. "I'm sorry. I didn't think…”

"No, it's fine," Miles waved her off. "No pity voice necessary." He grabbed a spatula and began to flip the pancakes over. "I just never really thought about being a dad until this happened."

"You know you're not anything like him," Lola said. She didn't know their dad all that well, aside from what Frankie had told her, but she could tell the impact his shitty behavior— abuse —had on Miles. It explained a lot, like how he'd ended up on drugs a couple of years ago. "Right?"

Miles just smiled, not seeming all that convinced. He was quiet for a minute as he finished cooking. "You want maple syrup? Butter?"

But Lola shook her head. "Do you have peanut butter?" That was what she'd always eaten her pancakes with, ever since she was a little kid. She couldn't remember if it had been her or her dad who'd started the tradition, but it seemed like the only way to eat them now.

Miles looked at her like she was nuts, but reached into the cabinet anyways and pulled out a jar of extra chunky, just the way Lola liked it. "Is this a pregnancy thing?" he asked. He slid the plate of pancakes towards her and joined her at the counter.

"No," Lola smiled, spreading the peanut butter over her pancakes. "It's a Lola thing." She dug in and took a bite.

"Well...?" Miles said, waiting for her reaction.

"It's so good," Lola said, taking in another mouthful. They were fluffy, soft, with just the right amount of sweetness. "Really, I love it. If I could marry these pancakes, I would."

That made Miles laugh. Lola giggled along with him. It just made her happy to see his smile. It had been a while since she'd seen it.

"Give me a bite," he demanded suddenly, which only made Lola laugh harder. She scowled, pretending to pout, then stubbornly held out her fork and pushed a bite toward his mouth. 

They were close now, their fingers brushing against each other and their faces mere inches apart. For a moment, it almost felt like they were going to kiss. There was just this... energy between them. Even when they were doing something as simple as eating pancakes. 

But then the front door opened. 

"Miles? Lola? _What are you doing here_?"


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola and Frankie come to blows regarding the secret Lola has been keeping.

It was pretty unlike Frankie to skip class, especially this early on in the day. Unlike her older brother, Frankie’s attendance record was relatively stellar. However, with a new driver’s permit in her wallet and the excuse that she had forgotten her math textbook, Frankie managed to slide out and swiftly exit the school parking lot undetected before the bell rang.

On her way to and from school she usually had to give Hunter a ride, so it was pretty rare that she was able to drive alone without either backseat driving or video game racket. The quiet was nice. The quiet was _needed_. Frankie needed some time to think.

She wasn’t sure exactly what was eating at her, but something hadn’t been right in her life for the past week or so. Longer, she thought.

Maybe it was the fact that she and Jonah were still on a break. That answer didn’t satisfy her, though. She missed Jonah for sure, but there was another puzzle piece missing… Something at the forefront of her brain that she hadn’t quite figured out.

As Frankie drove she began replaying the events of a night a few weeks earlier in her head. What had originally been a girl’s night had turned into Frankie, Shay, Lola, Jonah, Tiny, Grace, Zig and Esme drinking beer, eating pizza and playing party games. Esme’s presence of course meant drama had occurred, but Frankie had never gotten filled in on exactly what had happened while she was upstairs embarrassing herself in front of Jonah. From what Frankie had been told the morning after, Esme had triggered a heated moment between Shay and Lola about Tiny. Could that have been the thing making Lola pull away from Frankie and Shay?

She had barely talked to Lola in the past week. There had to be something that Lola was hiding - or something that Frankie was doing wrong and not realizing. Something. All Frankie knew was that she was growing tired of feeling so confused all the time. Welcome to being a teenager, her mother would always say. Like that helped.

Frankie was thrown off noticing her older brother’s car already parked in the driveway. “Why are you home, brother?” She said, talking only to herself as she carefully parked her car.

Miles was notorious for skipping class so she shouldn’t have been _that_ surprised, but most of his time outside of classes these days was spent visiting the hospital, so it was a bit strange that he was kicking it at home. At least it wasn’t their mother who was unexpectedly home, Frankie thought to herself. Frankie gathered her school bag as well as the rest of her things, admitting to herself that she was more than likely going to stay home for the rest of the day rather than just running into the house and grabbing the book then heading back to Degrassi. Miles had always been a pretty bad influence as a brother.

She headed toward the front door and fumbled with her keys a bit, struggling to find the front door key amongst a barrage of random keys she’d somehow accumulated over the years. Usually someone else just opened the door for her, or it was already unlocked. She shrugged and tried her luck, hoping Miles had forgotten to lock the front door behind him. Bingo.

He really needed to learn how to lock the door behind himself. Frankie opened the door and made a beeline for the kitchen to grab a snack. Her eyes immediately fell on Miles, then, hard to avoid since their faces were only inches apart… Lola.

“Miles? Lola? What are you doing here?” The words slipped out of Frankie’s mouth, shock overtaking her.

“It’s not what it looks like!” Lola exclaimed, distancing herself from Miles and pushing the plate that laid on the counter beneath the two of them to the side. “We were just having pancakes.” Lola’s cheeks turned visibly pink. Lola was horrible under pressure. It only took a few seconds before Lola was unable to control herself from babbling on. “And… we skipped school to go over the play. Degrassi is just… so much drama sometimes.”

“Lo.” Frankie stated simply, not satisfied with Lola’s rambling. It was clearly far from the full truth. Frankie was sick of the confusion. She was sick of half-truths, wondering, trying to figure out where her best friend was off to and if she was safe… She just wanted an answer. She didn’t need every single detail, but Lola’s mumbling and avoidant tactics weren’t going to cut it this time. Not after Frankie caught her nearly kissing Miles in her own kitchen. “What’s going on?”

Miles and Lola looked to each other and exchanged a glance. Frankie had never noticed how in tune they were with each other, almost like they had their own secret language. Maybe it wasn’t so crazy that people thought they were hooking up. But there was no way. There had to be another explanation, like maybe Lola had been freaking out over the drama and Miles had just been comforting her. As a friend. Maybe Lola had been feeling so desperate and frantic that she’d misread things and taken his listening ear as a sign of flirting. But no, something still didn’t add up. Miles got up and headed towards the stairs, his face noticeably pale.

“I’m just gonna give you two a minute…” He quietly slipped away, leaving just Lola and Frankie alone in the kitchen.

Frankie took his spot at the counter and turned to face her best friend. She needed the truth once and for all. “Please just tell me what’s going on,” Frankie begged. She didn’t care if she sounded pathetic at this point. “I promise I won’t judge you. Even if you did hook up with Tiny-”

Lola nearly jumped out of her chair. “What?” She seemed genuinely offended. “Why on earth would you think that? Where did you even get that idea?”

Okay, maybe it had been a dumb theory. “You and Shay had that big fight at our girls’ night and then you just disappeared all night,” Frankie shrugged. “Tiny was there. I heard you two went into a closet or something? Then a couple of weeks later you have a pregnancy scare. You can’t blame me for thinking…”

“My god. Franks. I’m not hooking up with Tiny. First off, we never even slept together while we were dating, why would we now? Second, I would never do that to Shay. Geez.”

“Well, I don’t know what to think anymore!” Frankie said. She knew she was coming off desperate and crazy, but she didn’t care at this point. She was fed up with all the secrets, the insane conspiracy theories she was weaving in her head to make sense of it all. “I’m supposed to be your best friend. I know something is going on, so just tell me what it is already!”

Lola suddenly went quiet, and it looked like something inside her had broken. That’s when Frankie realized this wasn’t just some stupid drama… Lola wasn’t okay. Frankie was sorry she’d yelled now.

“What’s going on is…” Lola started, her voice quiet and shaky, like it was hard to even get two words out. She smiled weakly, and Frankie noticed now that she was tearing up. “You’re going to be an aunt.”

Frankie just stared at Lola for the longest time. An aunt? “What are you talking about?” she managed.

“I’m pregnant,” Lola said. “I… I lied when I said the test was negative. I just needed time to sort my head out and figure out what to do. But I’m keeping the baby, I decided. We decided.”

Frankie’s head was pounding very hard and very fast. She looked Lola up and down, zeroing in on her stomach. Her best friend was pregnant. Lola was pregnant. Lola was pregnant with…

“Who’s we?”

“I meant… you’re literally going to be an aunt. It’s your brother’s baby, Frankie. Miles.”

All at once, everything hit Frankie like a train in motion. She couldn’t take her eyes off Lola’s stomach, connecting the dots.

“I know.” Lola spoke up again after a few moments of silence. “It’s weird. You can say it.”

“You’re…” Frankie tried to work through the words. “Pregnant. With Miles’ baby.” She said, then repeated, hoping repetition would help the shock set in. “You and Miles are pregnant… with a baby.”

Lola nodded to confirm. Her eyes were still filled with tears. “I’m sorry I lied to you, Franks.”

There was another long pause between the two. Frankie didn’t know what to say. This had finally brought answers, but it had also brought about a million more questions and concerns to Frankie’s mind. She couldn’t really be mad at Lola for not disclosing the pregnancy immediately, but the week or so following of distance and lack of disclosure made Frankie wonder if Lola really considered her a close friend. “How long would you have continued to hide this from me if I hadn’t walked in on you two doing… whatever you guys were just doing?” Frankie asked.

“I was craving pancakes.” Lola answered, “Miles and I skipped class this morning so he could drive me to the doctor. They did some tests to confirm that I’m pregnant and we got like a million pamphlets. That’s it. All of this just started, Frankie, I swear. We weren’t sneaking around. We aren’t even involved like that.”

“But you’re pregnant.” The words spilled out of Frankie’s mouth before she could stop herself. “I mean… You had to get pregnant somehow.”

Lola sighed, placing herself in one of the barstools at the kitchen counter. She pulled the plate of now-cold pancakes in front of her and gathered up the biggest bite her fork could hold. “Do you mind if I finish my pancakes while I tell you the story? Your brother is kind of a good cook..”

The comment about Miles made Frankie cringe a bit. In her head, there was no possible story or magical pancakes that could make her older brother taking her best friend's virginity and getting her pregnant not a total nightmare and like, the weirdest thing ever.

“Spill. Just… don’t chew with your mouth open.”

“It all started that day I got sent out of Perino’s class.” Lola started.

Frankie thought back… That was the beginning of the semester. It seemed like a lifetime ago. “You and Miles have been sneaking around for months?”

“No!” Lola answered immediately, spitting out bits of peanut butter pancake onto the counter. With her mouth still full, Lola motioned for Frankie to hand her a paper towel. Frankie grabbed the paper towel roll but held it just out of Lola’s reach.

“Then what do you mean it all started that day?“ Frankie paused, then handed the paper towels to Lola, who was now blushing and covering her food-covered face. Lola had gotten pregnant with her brother’s baby. Frankie figured she was entitled to a bit of healthy interrogation.

“Miles and I crossed paths in the hallway. He was frustrated because the people around him weren’t understanding him. Nobody was willing to hear him out and see where he was coming from. They just wanted him to shut up and be this perfect person…” Lola trailed off. The feeling sounded all too familiar to Frankie. “And then what?” she pressed.

“I felt like I could relate. We connected, we became friends. I swear, Franks, it was innocent. It _is_ innocent. We just got caught up in the moment one night.” Lola was getting worked up, sounding more like she was trying to convince herself than Frankie. Lola took a moment, then a deep breath, then continued with a more measured tone. “I was the only person who didn’t force him to constantly talk about the bus crash, or the hospital… I didn’t make him feel bad when he needed a day off and just wanted to hang out in the kitchen at the Cantina and sort produce while practicing Spanish and listening to music. It wasn’t this… illicit thing. Does illicit mean sexy?”

“I think it means like, forbidden.” Frankie replied, observing her friend as she shoved the last few bites on pancakes back and forth in a small bit of peanut butter on the plate.

“So it was illicit. But it wasn’t all about sex. We were really just good friends. We still sort of are, I think. Or at least… there’s a chance we could get it back..” Lola spoke with a hopeful tone.

Frankie was perplexed. “So are you guys together or not? You looked pretty friendly when I walked in.” She gritted her teeth at the second half of that, doing her best to hide her discomfort, but still feeling overwhelmingly, well, uncomfortable. How could she not be, with this situation?

“Not.” Lola responded. “But… we’re figuring this baby thing out. We care about each other.”

“I’m confused.” Frankie admitted. “Isn’t it easier to just… not do this?”

“Probably. But when Miles and I talked about it, it didn’t feel right.” Lola said. “We got a bunch of pamphlets that cover a whole range of options, but we’re picking the complicated route. Keeping it. Her… or him, I guess. Whatever the baby is.” That word still felt so weird coming out of Lola’s mouth. Lola was having a baby.

Frankie couldn’t believe it. How was she so calm about this? If it had been Frankie who’d gotten pregnant, she’d be hyperventilating. But here Lola was, just munching on her pancakes and acting like everything was normal. And then there was the Miles factor. Bringing a baby into the Hollingsworth house? Their mother would flip— and frankly, she didn’t even want to think of what their father would do. This was going to complicate things. A lot. And, honestly? A part of Frankie was pissed that Lola and Miles had snuck around behind her back like this in the first place. It was just something your best friend wasn’t supposed to do. And frankly, she didn’t really buy the idea that they’d just gotten caught up in the moment one night. There was more to this ‘friendship’, even if they wouldn’t admit it yet.

“I just...” Frankie started talking faster than she could think. She knew this was going to come out all wrong, but the words slipped out anyway. “I just think maybe you’re making a mistake.”

Lola put her fork down and went quiet. Crap. That had been the wrong word to use.

“A mistake,” Lola repeated. “Cool. Thanks for the advice, Franks.”

“You know that’s not what I meant,” Frankie said clumsily. But it was obvious she’d struck a nerve.

“I know you think I’m dumb and can’t handle anything, but I’ve been figuring out this baby stuff for weeks, all on my own.” Lola asserted. It felt more like Lola was opening up and defending herself than arguing, but the tone still held a good deal of anger and volume. “I understand the situation is messy. It’s already the hardest thing I’ve ever done and we’ve barely even gotten started, but-” Frankie interrupted, something she knew she needed to stop doing.

“You misunderstood me, Lo...”

“No, I didn’t. I know that thought. I’ve _had_ that thought.” Lola continued as she began cleaning up the mess that she and Miles had made of the kitchen. “This is a mistake, this shouldn’t have happened in the first place, but while she has the chance and it’s still early, why doesn’t she erase all evidence that this ever happened?”

There was a deafening silence between the two for a moment. “So why not?” Frankie dared to ask.

“If you and Miles aren’t in love, if you see that this is gonna ruin your entire life and turn everything upside down, why do you need to keep this...baby?”

“I’ve thought about this more than anything in my entire life. Miles and I have talked about it. I’ve cried into my pillow and questioned myself a dozen times, even after I had Miles on board.” Lola paused, placing the dirty dishes she had collected in the sink carefully. “This is the hardest decision I’ve ever made, but it’s a decision I’ve made. If I change my mind and decide something different is right for me, then that’s for me to decide, but I’m already doubting every move I make right now. I don’t need my best friend doing it too.”

“So I can’t tell you how I feel about you getting pregnant with my brother’s baby?” Frankie shot back, feeling a bit insulted.

“Not if you’re making me feel bad about what I do with my own body. God, Frankie, this is why I didn’t tell you in the first place! You were so judgy about the sex, I knew you’d be ten times worse when you found out the whole story.” Lola paused for a moment and collected herself. When she spoke again, her tone was softer. “I don’t wanna hide stuff from you, Franks. I just wasn’t ready to tell anyone about this yet. It’s scary,” Lola admitted. “Can’t you just forget the circumstances for a minute, forget who the father is… and just be here for me?”

“I can’t just forget that you slept with Miles.” The words felt so gross coming out of Frankie’s mouth. “I’m sorry. I need time to think before I can be okay with any of this.” At this point, Frankie just wanted to distance herself before she said something she ended up regretting. “Am I gonna be running into you in my kitchen all the time now?” She asked. If this messed up union between her best friend and her older brother were to continue, Frankie had to assume this wouldn’t be the last time she would see Lola pop up around the Hollingsworth chateau uninvited.

“It probably won’t be the last time,” Lola admitted, her soft voice now sounding meek and hurt. “I know this is probably the last thing you want to do right now, but… could you promise to keep this a secret until Miles and I are ready? We’ve only got a couple more weeks before I start showing, and the longer we have to plan the perfect way to do this the better…”

“Sure.” Frankie said, leaving the harsher words she wanted to say at the tip of her tongue. She stepped past Lola to look into the refrigerator for a snack, something she had intended to do before the baby bombshell had dropped. As her eyes scanned the contents of the refrigerator, however, Frankie realized that her appetite had dissipated. Her hunger had been replaced with a cocktail of confusing emotions. “I think I’m gonna go upstairs. Do I need to get Miles to give you a ride home?” Frankie said, not-so-subtly hinting that she would rather Lola not stick around for the rest of the day. Lola nodded sadly with her eyes glued to the floor.

“I’m sorry you found out like this.” Frankie stepped toward the stairs, turning back to look at Lola once more before she went upstairs.

“Me too.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After arguing with Lola, Frankie finds a listening ear from an unexpected source.

“Have you heard anything from Lola?” Shay asked, interrupting the monotonous pattern of the in-class activity Frankie and Shay had been assigned in English class.

“I don’t think that’s a grammar question.” Frankie responded, skirting the question. 

Even if she hadn’t made a promise to Lola and Miles to keep things quiet for a few weeks, her brain was honestly still too scrambled on the subject to talk about her best friend who had gotten impregnated by her older brother. No matter how many times she repeated it in her head, trying to normalize it, it just wasn’t working. It was still too weird. 

“Both of you were absent from Mandarin the other day, and Tiny’s got math with Miles. He said that Miles wasn’t there either.” 

“Gee, you pay attention.” Frankie said. “Miles and Lola weren’t together.” She said, then caught herself. “I mean, of course they weren’t…” She paused, trying to figure out the best words to use before she dug herself into an even bigger hole. 

A voice interrupted from the desk behind Frankie. “Frankie and Miles had a family emergency. Miles was in my first period and I saw him getting called out because of it.” Esme, unexpectedly saving the day with a killer lie. Esme had a weird ability to sort of fade into the background when she wasn’t trying to cause havoc. Up until this moment, both girls had honestly forgotten that Esme was seated right behind them in English class. 

The sight of Esme immediately made Shay recoil. “Frankie could’ve told me that.” Shay spoke sternly, not caring to hide her disdain for Esme. “Plus I thought I saw Hunter and his gaming buddies in the hallway like, all day. I didn’t realize that Miles wasn’t around until Tiny told me, so I thought you just got sick or something and didn’t get a chance to text me.” 

Frankie looked to Esme. She knew she couldn’t rely on Esme to answer every question for her, but honestly, she hadn’t done a bad job so far. Esme raised her brow to Frankie for a moment before catching onto Frankie’s panic. 

“You really think Hunter cares about their sick Uncle Thomas? Sure, that’s where Hunter got his middle name, but he’s a selfish teenage boy. I think he said something like… it’d be better for his  _ ‘mental health’  _ to stay at school with his friends or something... right, Frankie?” Esme came up with a whole story off the top of her head effortlessly. It seemed like she had fun weaving narratives off the top of her head. 

“Um, right.” Frankie quickly played along. The horrible, manipulative things that Esme had done to people Frankie cared about couldn’t be erased or ignored in an instant, but Frankie couldn’t lie —it was sort of amazing to watch Esme work her magic up close. The word-twisting and candy-sweet lies weren’t quite as intimidating when Esme was on her side. 

The bell rang, interrupting the conversation before Shay could question things much further. Frankie knew that this was likely not the end of the discussion, but Esme had at least bought Frankie some time. Much appreciated time, especially because Frankie had no idea how she was going to contain this secret.

Shay was met by Tiny at the doorway. Students slowly trickled out of the classroom into the hallway until only Frankie and Esme were left in the classroom. 

“Do you have a free period?” Esme asked, and Frankie shook her head. Frankie’s need to retake Geometry for a grade better than a D had robbed her of the chance to have a free period this term. “Wanna make this next period a free one?” 

For some reason, Frankie agreed without hesitation. Esme felt like the only person in the past couple of weeks who hadn’t stressed her out in one way or another. She knew skipping class constantly wasn’t the best move, but if Esme and Miles could do it constantly and still be keeping themselves afloat, a few missed periods here and there never hurt anyone.  _ Except Lola _ . Frankie thought. If this weren’t such a horrible, confusing situation, she probably would’ve laughed at that thought. 

Frankie and Esme exited the classroom together, casually stepping past a few teachers and hordes of students who were making their last preparations before the bell rang again. “We’ve got about three minutes before the bell rings and the halls start clearing out. I say we make a beeline for the parking lot now. You’ve got a car, right?” Esme spoke as the two made their way toward a side door which allowed them easy access to the parking lot. Degrassi really made it too easy for students to just walk out. 

“Yep. Where to?” Frankie responded, pulling keys out of her pocket and jingling them in the air. The more she looked around the crowded halls of Degrassi, the more she wanted out. She had no idea what she was about to do or where she was about to go with Esme Song, but anywhere was better than here. 

The two girls made it to Frankie’s mom’s car without any major issues or interruption, a feat that Frankie was nervous they wouldn't achieve after having to duck and avoid Coach Armstrong in the parking lot. Once they were settled in, Esme looked to Frankie and finally answered the question of where they were going. “Just drive, I’ll direct you.” 

…

After driving for around ten minutes, Frankie reluctantly pulled her car onto a dirt road per Esme’s request. “This is…” Frankie started.

“The ravine!” Esme beamed. “It’s basically been abandoned for the past couple years after a bunch of kids kept getting busted doing drugs and messing around. It was a real hot spot for a while. Now… Most days you can pretty much have it to yourself whenever you want. People have moved on, I guess.” 

Frankie turned the key in her car’s ignition and pulled it out, decidedly parking herself there with Esme. “Why not? I could use an adventure. And a distraction.” 

“Got any beers in the trunk of that car?” Esme probed, then smiled. “I’m kidding. Although I wouldn’t say no to a wine cooler. It’s past noon after all.” Frankie could never fully tell when Esme was joking. 

Esme stepped out of the car, walking around the car and opening Frankie’s car door before Frankie could even get her mind right enough to think about opening the door. There was no denying that Frankie wasn’t functioning at full capacity. Her mind and body was being weighed down by the news that she had received about Miles and Lola, and the fact that she had to keep it all to herself. 

Esme reached her hand out to Frankie in a cheesy way, as if she were a chauffeur offering her hand. “Come on, get out of the car Princess Francesca.” Esme teased, pulling Frankie out of the car the moment their fingers touched. “Now, come on. Let’s go find a huge rock to sit on and you can empty that head.” It was weird how comforting Esme was being. Frankie knew that Esme had her redeeming factors and appealing moments. There was no good reason why Miles or Zig or anyone else would have invested so much time into her if she was just pure evil… right? Frankie was still more than hesitant to open up to Esme. Too much destruction had been caused by this girl. 

Walking for a moment, Frankie observed Esme as she danced through the crunchy leaves and twigs on the ground as if they didn’t exist. “You’re crazy.” Frankie allowed herself to smile a bit, indulging Esme and causing the other girl to smile as well.

“That’s what they keep telling me,” Esme said. “And yet I keep saving everyone’s asses, even when they don’t deserve it. Why do you think that is?” 

“Like I said... Crazy.” Frankie replied teasingly. Something about Esme just...flowed, and made words flow out of Frankie. Esme didn’t go for all of the formalities or niceties that ended up blocking true conversation a lot of the time. She just went for what she wanted, impulsively. When she wasn’t destroying lives, Esme was kind of a nice change of pace. “Why do  _ you _ think you saved my ass?” Frankie asked. She was truly curious about the other girl’s intentions. 

Esme shrugged. “I could tell you were in some deep crap with Shay. Whatever she was interrogating you about, she was about two questions from getting you to spill the beans. I help where I can, and your whole family sucks at lying.” 

“That’s not true.” Frankie disputed. 

“You, Miles, your stinking lying cheating dad…” Esme started.

“Alright, that’s enough.” Frankie cut Esme off. “Let’s not bring dads into this.” She shuddered, thinking about the fact that her brother would now soon be a dad. All paths lead back to this stupid, dirty secret. She wished she had just kept herself in the dark and found out with everyone else. At least then she could at least talk to  _ someone _ about this. “I’m keeping someone else’s secret and it’s eating me up inside.” Frankie admitted. 

Esme didn’t look surprised. In fact, she immediately offered up a guess. “Miles is sleeping with Lola?” 

“Um… yeah.” Frankie replied, leaving out the vital  _ pregnancy _ part. She already felt guilty for partially spilling, or at least  _ confirming _ the beans. If Esme didn’t suspect more, she didn’t need to know more. Not yet. “It’s...complicated. And I’m not supposed to talk.” 

“Are you mad at them?” 

Frankie thought over that question. “My first impulse says yes.” She took a note out of Esme’s book and threw caution to the wind slightly, letting her impulses control her rather than trying to control them. “I mean… how could I not be? I’ve known Lola since middle school. She’s like a sister to me. The fact that she slept with my brother in the first place feels weird and incest-y. I never saw them as contenders to one another.”

“So you’re in shock too.” Esme properly identified another thing Frankie was feeling. 

“Mad, shocked, betrayed… It’s just weird, too. When I discovered them together they looked so natural.” Frankie thought back to the other day. She remembered walking in and finding Lola and Miles so close together, looking so domestic and happy… She had never seen either of them so comfortable with another person before. And Lola, after Frankie confronted her about the whole Miles thing… She was sad and stressed, but more sure of herself than she had ever been. “I just feel like… It’s not real, and I can’t make it make sense in my head. They built this whole bond behind my back. I feel like they didn’t trust me, and it hurts.” Frankie paused to reflect and noticed that Esme had stopped dancing around the ravine and was instead quietly walking next to Frankie, listening to every word she said. Not judging or interjecting commentary or advice...just listening. It was nice to be listened to for once.

…

By the time Frankie and Esme reached their location, a bit of the weight on Frankie’s chest had already eased. Just explaining how she was feeling to someone who was willing to listen was doing wonders. Esme was also a surprisingly good listener. No matter how at ease Esme was making her feel, however, Frankie kept in mind what the other girl was capable of and kept the details scarce. No use in testing her luck, especially with a secret as big as this. Even if she was mad at Lola, she had made a promise not to tell anyone. 

“So… where are we?” Frankie asked. The two girls stood in a cluster of trees. Esme reached into a bush and pulled out a medium-sized yellow cooler. Carrying the cooler, Esme approached a partially dry-rotted picnic table. 

“Take a seat. Carefully.” Esme said, pointing to the more stable side of the table as she eased the cooler onto the ground and opened it up. Inside was a large blanket, which Esme pulled out and spread onto the patchy grass. Once the blanket was moved from inside the cooler, a small six-pack of glass bottles were revealed to be at the bottom. Of course Esme had a secret stash of booze in the middle of the woods.

Esme pulled the small six-pack from the cooler and held the different-colored bottles to the light. “I’m feelin’ peachy, how ‘bout you?” She held up a pinkish bottle with a label that read ‘Peachy Keen’. 

“It’s a little early, I think.” Frankie spoke. She was glad that Esme wasn’t harping on the whole Lola subject. Anyone else would’ve probably asked a million questions and never let Frankie hear the end of the topic. Esme was just treating Frankie like a human being. Maybe even a friend. 

“More for me.” Esme shrugged. “So, you seem a little less stressed than you did in class. Didn’t even need booze for it. Just me. Am I human booze?” 

Frankie let herself smile a little. “I guess you kind of are. Fun in small doses, a little dangerous if you let it go too far…” 

“Me, dangerous?” Esme feigned shock. “I have no idea what you could be referring to, Francesca. I’m a bottle of fun and nothing less.”

“You definitely make people let loose.” Frankie admitted. “My dear brother included, which is… so gross to recall.” Frankie shook away the image of Esme and Miles all over one another, something she had to see in every corner of the school and their house at one point. “Why does everyone want to get with Miles?”

Esme threw back a quarter of the bottle that she was drinking in one sip. “He’s cute. And complicated.” 

“Complicated is right.” Frankie sighed, her mind cycling back to the baby mama drama her brother had gotten himself entangled in. Another semester, another life-changing crisis. Some things never changed for the Hollingsworth family. “Very complicated.” She felt the stress bubbling back up the more she thought about what was to come in her family. 

“And he’s the first person I met in a long time that genuinely cared about me.” Esme added.

“Wait… you guys cared about each other?” Frankie knew that the two had definitely done drugs and slept together, but she had never witnessed anything that would make her think that Miles and Esme had any sort of true deeper relationship. 

“We were both really messed up at the time, but...yeah. I was sort of obsessed with keeping him around. He was the only good thing I had at the time.” Esme took another large swig of the peach wine cooler, nearly leaving the bottle empty. “Till’ I met Ziggy, of course.”

Frankie eyed the remainder of the wine cooler, kind of wishing she had taken Esme up on her offer. “I don’t feel like anyone really cares about me,” she sighed. “Jonah. Miles. Lola…”

“I’ve always thought you could do better than Jonah,” Esme said. She had no real filter, which Frankie somehow found both annoying and admirable. “He acts like he’s  _ so  _ much better than everyone because he doesn’t have any fun. And that haircut? Please.”

“Alright, I get it,” Frankie mumbled. She wasn’t particularly in the mood to hear a ‘ _ Jonah sucks’ _ speech, but at the same time, it kind of validated her too. She still didn’t know whether or not she wanted this break of theirs to end. Maybe things weren’t working out between them because she was immature and insecure…maybe Jonah just wasn’t the right person for her, period.  _ If you were with the right person, I don’t think you’d be that girl _ , she remembered Lola saying. Maybe she was right. 

Esme shrugged. “Just saying. You could do better.” She took a swig and finished off the last bit of the wine cooler. “But with Lola… well, I totally get why you’re pissed. I would be too. But I don’t think her hooking up with your  _ complicated  _ older brother means she doesn’t care about you.” She paused, and Frankie wondered what exactly she was getting at. “Sex is weird and complicated. People will judge you no matter who you’re doing it with. Hell, I get slut-shamed for hooking up with my own boyfriend. I can’t exactly say I blame Lola for not disclosing everything.”

Frankie felt a little pang of guilt in her stomach, knowing she’d definitely been one of the people who’d gossiped about Esme going down on Zig and even agreed that she was  _ damaged _ . But this Lola and Miles thing was more complicated than that, it wasn’t just sex. Still though, Frankie knew she had been judgy even before she knew who Lola was sleeping with or that she was pregnant. It still hurt, but maybe she could kind of understand why Lola had been hesitant to tell her the truth.

“All I’m saying is,” Esme continued, “don’t throw away your best friend of like, five years because of a stupid thing with Miles.”

If only it  _ was _ just a stupid thing and not a whole complicated, life-changing pregnancy scenario, Frankie sighed to herself. Maybe Esme had a point, though. Maybe she at least needed to hear Lola and Miles out and try to understand this baby drama mess. “I guess,” she managed.

Esme glanced down at her phone and looked at the time. The “free” period was almost over. “I’d love to blow off the rest of the afternoon, but we should get back to school. Can’t risk Harvard rejecting me for missing a geometry quiz.” She stood up and reached her hand out to Frankie to pull her up. It felt weirdly intimate for someone she’d barely spoken to before this afternoon, but Frankie grabbed her hand anyways. 

Frankie drove the two of them back to the Degrassi parking lot, feeling a little better now. She was still conflicted and confused about a lot of things, but it felt nice to just be listened to for once. Honestly, Esme had surprised her by how empathetic she’d been. 

The bell rang in the distance. “Gotta run,” Esme said, opening the car door. “But we should do this again sometime.” She smiled at Frankie, then closed the door and sprinted off. Once she was gone, Frankie realized Esme had left her a few wine coolers in the backseat. 

Maybe Esme was a little crazy… but why was that such a bad thing?


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frankie and Miles have a much needed heart-to-heart.

Frankie lounged around her bed in sweatpants, trying to drown her stress in  _ The Vampire Diaries,  _ a big bowl of chips, and a little bit of strawberry wine cooler Esme had snuck her the other day. She'd been able to play off her moodiness to Hunter and her mom as Jonah blues. But it was mostly just the Lola and Miles situation still, and the fact that her older brother couldn't seem to get it through his skull that she did  _ not  _ want to talk to him.

As if he could hear the angry thoughts about him in her head, Miles barged into her bedroom, not bothering to knock as per usual. "Mom's at a PTA meeting," he said with very little expression on his face. "She left us pizza money. What kind do you want?"

"I don't care," Frankie mumbled. She grabbed another handful of chips and tried to keep her eyes on the TV. "Since when does Mom do  _ PTA _ , anyway?"

Miles shrugged. "I think getting involved with school stuff is just her way of trying to make up for... you know. Everything with Dad."

That was the Hollingsworth way of doing things, Frankie thought to herself. Screw up, then come crawling back with presents. "I'm not hungry," Frankie said sharply, although the chips she was scarfing down said differently. "Now, will you get out?"

"Come on, Frankenstein," Miles said, his tone softer. "Hunter and I can't possibly eat all this pizza by ourselves." He offered her a smile, but for some reason, that just irritated Frankie more.

She couldn't look at Miles without thinking of him and Lola together, how they'd carried out this whole affair right under her nose. How everything was going to be different and weird forever, and it was all because of her brother. "Why don't you invite your mistress?" she snarked.

Miles' face fell, and almost immediately she regretted it. She was pissed, but that almost felt like too mean of a jab. He'd spent months by Tristan's bedside, and to just label him a cheater like their dad probably wasn't fair. She winced apologetically. "Miles, I didn't-"

She half expected Miles to storm out, but instead, he sat down on the bed. "Actually," he said, his tone somber all of a sudden, "Tristan dumped me."

Frankie snapped upright. "What?"

"Yeah... a couple of days ago. I told him I slept with Lola and..." He stared down into his lap. "Look, it’s fine. I deserved to get dumped. I'm a shit boyfriend."

Frankie put her hand on his back, forgetting all of her own anger for a moment. True, Miles  _ had  _ cheated. She'd like to think that, god forbid she ever found herself in a coma, Jonah would stand by her side and not fall into Grace's lap. But Miles had spent nearly every day at the hospital since the accident, for months on end. She didn't know many 17-year-olds who would be able to do that. To be honest, it had worried Frankie at times just how devoted he was to staying by Tristan's side 24/7, as if they were married or something. She also couldn't help but wonder if Tristan would have done the same for her brother had the situation been reversed, or if they would have even stayed together this long if not for the crash.

Frankie was still angry about the Lola situation, but maybe she was beginning to understand. All this pressure Miles put on himself to be this perfect boyfriend, it disappeared when he was around Lola. She thought back to what Lola said to her over pancakes the other day,  _ Nobody was willing to hear him out and see where he was coming from. They just wanted him to shut up and be this perfect person.  _ The way the two of them looked so natural and comfortable with each other in her kitchen had thrown her off the other day, but now all she could think of was how  _ happy  _ Miles looked with her. How different he'd seemed with her than with Tristan, or Esme, or Maya, or anyone. Maybe, in some screwed up way, Lola had simply been the light he'd needed in all this darkness. Mad at him or not, Frankie wasn't about to let her brother spiral again. "No," Frankie said to him, her hand still on his back. "Don't say stuff like that, okay? You're not a shit person. You're just...  _ human _ , Miles."

Miles sighed, not convinced. "I just felt so trapped, you know? Zoe and everyone wanted me by Tristan's side every day. But then nobody wanted to hear about it the next day at school. It felt like everyone just wanted me to be the one to deal with all this. But I was suffocating."

"You were lonely," Frankie nodded.

"Yeah," Miles said. "I was. And Lola, she was my rock. She listened to me.  _ Really _ listened. It was just nice to have someone to talk to."

"What kind of things did you and Tristan talk about?" Frankie said. "Before the crash, I mean."

Miles fell silent. "Er..." He scratched his head. "I guess... student council stuff. Zoe drama. Um..." He looked stumped. "I... I really don't know."

Frankie had always been a bit perplexed by their relationship, honestly. Not because Tristan was a guy, but because she wondered what they really had in common. There was basketball and some mutual friends, sure. But she'd never forgotten the time Miles came home from school after the student council debate and just sat outside staring at the pool for hours, totally despondent at the humiliating words Tristan had said on stage.  _ How could he do that to me, Frankie?  _ he'd said.

"Lola made me feel good," Miles continued. "She never expected me to be anyone else but myself." He was silent for a moment, looking like he was trying to figure out how to word this. "Look Frankie, the reason me and Tristan broke up isn't just because of the baby, or because I cheated. He asked me if I still had feelings for Lola. And I... I couldn't say no."

Frankie absorbed this. "Wait," she said, "does that mean you're dating Lola now?"

"No," Miles shook his head. "No, we're not together. But I think I... I  _ want _ to be with her." He paused, as if to dismiss the idea as some silly fantasy. "But I've already screwed up her life enough. I mean, you think either of us wanted a baby? The last thing she needs is me for a boyfriend on top of it."

"Don't be an idiot, Miles," Frankie said. "I saw the way you two were acting in the kitchen the other day. There's obviously still something there." She sighed. "I still find it really weird. And I still think having a baby is crazy. But honestly, I don't...  _ hate  _ the idea of you two as a couple. I know Lola cares about you. And if you guys make each other happy, then I guess it's kind of sweet. In a weird sort of way..."

Miles eased up a little. "Thanks, Frankenstein," he said, and slowly formed a smile.

Frankie shrugged. "Yeah, well, like I said... I still think this whole thing is crazy. But..."

"It  _ is  _ crazy," Miles said. He laughed under his breath, "I mean, geez. Me with a baby? How the hell am I supposed to handle that?"

"The only baby I've ever seen you with was that robobaby for home ec. a couple of years ago. You dropped it so hard Hunter had to reprogram it," Frankie remembered. Miles was grinning like it was hilarious, but Frankie could see the real truth in her brother's eyes: he was scared. Really scared. Maybe it was her turn to be the reassuring sibling for once. "But, that feels like a million years ago," she said. "You've grown up a lot.  _ A lot _ . As crazy as you being a dad is... you can do this." She lowered her voice. "Besides," she added, "let's be honest. Dad set the Dad bar pretty low."

Miles and Frankie shared a look, and both gave in and laughed. Frankie still couldn't quite wrap her head around the idea of Miles and Lola having a baby, or even that Lola was pregnant in the first place. Everything was going to be different, forever. But maybe this would all be worth it somehow when she got to hold her niece or nephew in her arms.

"Listen," Miles said, and Frankie snapped out of her trance. "Don't shut Lola out, okay? She's going to need you when everyone finds out. I mean, nobody really knows yet, but-"

"Wait, didn't you tell Tristan about the baby?"

"No... I left that part out," Miles said, his face kind of pale. "Look, I already told him I slept with Lola. He has enough to deal with. He doesn't need to know about the...  _ other _ part yet. Nobody needs to know until Lola is ready."

"Or until she starts showing..."

Miles sighed. "Just... don't freeze Lola out. Okay?" He hopped off the bed. "We have her first ultrasound appointment in a few days. Maybe you should come."

Frankie mulled on this. Like she said, she didn't entirely hate the idea of the two of them being an item— but she wasn't sure she was ready to go organize Lola a baby shower just yet. She loved Lola, but it was going to take time for their friendship to feel normal again. "I'll think about it."

Miles didn't look completely satisfied with that, but he let it go. He turned towards the hall. "So, you coming down to dinner?"

Frankie felt her stomach grumble. She pushed the bowl of chips aside and hopped off the bed. "Yeah, I guess I  _ am _ kinda hungry." She followed her brother out the door and raced him down the stairs, the pizza suddenly the only thing she could think about.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frankie tags along for Lola's ultrasound appointment. Miles and Lola finally discuss their feelings for each other.

"How are you feeling?" Miles said as they climbed into his car after school.

Lola's first ultrasound was this afternoon and she was beyond nervous. Her dad had never been much of a modern medicine guy— she'd mostly grown up just gulping down traditional Argentine soups whenever she was sick. But she knew she had to put her baby's health first now, even if the thought of some judgy doctor poking at her belly scared the absolute crap out of her. It wasn’t just this that was making her anxious, though. Over the last week, it had really started to hit her just how much things were going to change, every little symptom a reminder that her life had been turned upside down. And the prolonged silence between her and Frankie only added to that sting. She’d just felt really, really alone. Honestly, Miles was the only person keeping her sane.

Lola wasn’t quite sure what was going on between the two of them these days. He had oomfchatted her in the middle of the night a couple of days ago and asked if she was awake. When she said yes, he called her. Right away, Lola could tell something was off. He told her he and Tristan were over. It kind of took Lola by surprise— even with the two of them having a baby, she didn’t think Miles would ever leave Tristan for good. She felt worse once Miles told her that Tristan had actually dumped  _ him _ . Had she been selfish to continue the pregnancy? Was Miles going to be miserable now with a life he didn’t want? But when she asked Miles how he felt, he said that he just wanted to hear her voice. They fell asleep on the phone together that night.

They’d been talking more and more since then, slipping back into their old oomfchat habits and talking on the phone every night. They were still just friends, but… well, could they ever  _ really _ be just friends? Lola would be lying if she’d said there weren’t some lingering feelings. After all, this was the guy she’d lost her virginity to, the guy who got her pregnant, the first guy she’d really had a deep connection with. But at the same time, was now really the time to risk getting her heart broken? To be some rebound? Even if something real could happen between them now, their focus needed to be on the baby, not each other, Lola told herself. Or at least, she tried to convince herself.

"Nauseous. Nervous," Lola said. It felt like a million butterflies were in her stomach, but not the good, cutesy kind. More like a million  _ angry  _ butterflies. Bees, maybe. "Ugh. Did I mention nauseous?"

Miles froze. "Wait. Are you gonna-"

"Relax, I’m not gonna puke," Lola said. She sighed. "I'm just worried about the baby. I don't even know if I'm doing anything right. What if I've already messed up somehow?"

"You haven't," Miles said assuredly. "But I hate to break it to you. They’re a Hollingsworth... so they're gonna be a  _ little  _ messed up no matter what." He gave her a smile and Lola couldn't help but laugh. Miles had a way of doing that, getting her to smile even when she'd been totally freaking out seconds earlier. Maybe all those "don't be sad, be yappy" oomfchats of hers had finally rubbed off on him.

But then Miles frowned. "Dammit," he mumbled as he turned his keys.

"What?"

"It won't start," Miles muttered. The engine made a sputtering noise. Lola didn't know much about cars, but she knew enough to know that sound wasn't a good thing.

"What?" Lola said. "But your car is practically brand new. How can it not start?"

"I don't know. Maybe it just needs a jump or something..."

"I can't miss this appointment," Lola said, suddenly panicked. It had taken weeks to get an appointment at all, let alone one that worked around Cantina shifts and play rehearsals. 

"We won't miss it," Miles tried to reassure. "Okay? Don't worry. Let me just call Frankie and tell her to drive us."

Lola paused. "Frankie."

"Yeah, she's got my mom's car and-"

"No, it's... it's not that," Lola sighed. "It's just, we’ve barely spoken since she found out about everything. It's still weird between us. I don't even know if we're still friends..." She was pissed at Frankie, but she also knew she wasn’t exactly innocent in this situation either. After all, she  _ had  _ slept with her best friend’s brother here. That had to be like, one of the seven deadly sins of girl friendship. But still, even if they were justified, Frankie’s words had hurt. A lot.

"She's still your best friend, Lo. You two will get through this," Miles said. "Besides," he added, "She's not gonna pass up her chance to be an aunt."

"Okay," Lola gave in half-heartedly. "Call her, I guess." They'd need to get to the doctor's one way or another— and her and Frankie also needed to fix things, one way or another. She just hoped Frankie still cared enough to try.

...

To Lola’s surprise, Frankie  _ did _ come through. She picked them up about 10 minutes after Miles called. She barely said a word to Lola or Miles in the car, but she didn’t seem nearly as cold now. If anything, it just felt kind of awkward and off, the way it had between Lola, Frankie, and Shay the morning after their disaster of a girls’ night. Shit, Lola realized, she was going to have to tell Shay about the pregnancy sooner or later too. The thought of telling people, even her friends, was still really scary. Worse, she was going to have to walk around  _ school _ pregnant. She just wanted to be invisible for the next few months.

The three of them sat in the waiting room, Lola in between Frankie and Miles and all of them quiet. To pass the time, Lola looked around at the babies in the room and made note of which ones were the cutest. A little girl with curly hair and a pacifier waved at her. Lola smiled at the baby and waved back. She was confident her and Miles' baby would definitely be the cutest of all though, even if it was currently the size of a sea monkey.

Lola glanced over at Frankie. "Thanks for not making us take an Uber."

"Yeah, sure," Frankie said. She hardly looked up from her magazine.

"You didn't have to come in with us."

Frankie shrugged. "It was too cold in the car."

Lola wanted to press for more, but Frankie clearly wasn't interested in making conversation. So she went back to looking at the babies, the curly-haired one still her favorite.

A nurse poked her head out the door. "Lola Pacini? We're ready for you."

Lola sprang up from her seat, feeling those intense butterflies again. She turned to follow Miles into the room, but found her feet stuck to the floor. Something was missing. "Frankie? Will you come back with us?"

Frankie finally looked Lola in the eye. "Why?"

"Because I need you," Lola said quietly. There. She said it. She couldn’t do this without her best friend. And she knew that, deep down, there was a part of Frankie that already loved the baby. Otherwise she wouldn’t have come in the first place. "And because this is your niece or nephew."

Frankie didn't say anything for a moment. But then, just as Lola was about to turn away, Frankie got up. She didn't say anything, but she trailed behind Lola, and the three of them followed the nurse into the room.

Miles was surprisingly protective, asking lots of questions and even holding Lola's hand as the doctor talked. It made Lola glad that, if she was going to end up in this situation, it was at least with Miles and not some guy who wouldn't care. Frankie mostly stayed glued to her phone, but perked up every now and then when she thought Lola wasn't watching.

The doctor readied the ultrasound machine, rolling Lola's shirt up to squirt some cool gel over her stomach. It wasn't exactly an obvious baby bump yet, but her stomach definitely had a little curve to it. Miles stared wide-eyed, and Lola turned her attention to the screen, suddenly self-conscious. She knew she wouldn’t be able to hide this much longer.

And then...  _ Lola saw it _ . Right there on that screen was a fuzzy little thing floating around. It was so small, yet so perfectly clear to her: the head, the legs, even a tiny little nose if she squinted. It wriggled around, tiny but beaming with life. This beautiful, unexpected little piece of hope that had come out of that one messy night. Lola wanted to find the exact right words to capture how she was feeling, but instead she found herself rambling, "It looks like a little jelly bean!"

Her cheeks turned pink at her own words. What a dumb thing to say the first time she saw her baby, she thought. Still, it did look like a little jelly bean. A really  _ beautiful _ jelly bean. “Miles…?” She turned to look at him. He still hadn’t said anything, just staring straight at the screen. Lola couldn’t read his expression. It made her nervous. Oh god. This wasn’t him having second thoughts, right?

The doctor cleared his throat. “Baby looks healthy,” he declared. “Developing perfectly normally for about 10 weeks.” 

Miles spoke up suddenly. “It’s... perfect,” he said, and his voice cracked a little as he said it. His eyes were glassy. “Lola, that’s…” He slowly grabbed her hand and gave it a tiny squeeze, but still didn’t tear his eyes away from the screen. “That’s our baby.” He smiled, and all of the doubt in Lola’s mind melted away.

Lola squeezed his hand back. “I think it has your nose.”

“No… that’s definitely  _ mine _ .”

Lola turned her head around, surprised to hear Frankie’s voice. She didn’t think she’d been paying attention to any of this. But her eyes were glued to the screen, like she was just as mesmerized. Her face was softer now, and Lola thought she actually saw a hint of a smile on Frankie’s face. “I mean, I’m sure it will get  _ some _ of Miles’ good genes, whatever those are. But it’s totally gonna take after me more.”

Lola let herself ease up. “As long as it’s cuter than that app we tried. Remember the one that meshed our faces together?” 

She locked eyes with both Hollingsworth siblings, and the three of them shared a look that undoubtedly said,  _ This is going to be okay _ . The whole situation was still strange, but it would be okay between all of them. It felt right, having both Miles and Frankie here.

The doctor drew their attention back in. “Let’s see if we can hear the heartbeat now.” He picked up a Doppler and moved it across Lola’s stomach.

The room was suddenly filled with a subtle, yet strong rhythm.  _ Badum badum _ . The monitor lit up in intervals as the sound played. Lola felt her own heart speed up, and for a moment, she thought she was going to cry. Her baby was real…

_ But not just  _ her _ baby,  _ she realized as she met Miles’ eyes.  _ Theirs.  _

Lola couldn’t quite explain it, but something about the energy in the room changed when they heard it. Suddenly, it felt like she and Miles were the only two in the room. Almost like they were back in his bed the way they had been that night, safe from the rest of the world, just the two of them, enjoying… whatever this was. 

Frankie seemed to pick up on the energy too. “I think maybe I should give you guys a minute,” she said, and got up. “I’ll wait in the car.” 

Frankie threw a glance at Lola on her way out the door. One that almost felt like… an approval? Permission to be alone with her brother? Lola didn’t know what exactly Frankie thought was going on between her and Miles, but she seemed to be…okay with it. Or at least not repulsed. 

But even if Frankie  _ was  _ okay with the idea of Lola and Miles now, it was still just that: an idea. They were still just co-parents, Lola told herself. Good friends. Nothing more. Right?

The doctor wrapped up the exam and gave Miles and Lola each a copy of the ultrasound. Lola would have to figure out how to get a digital copy for her phone so she could make it her lockscreen eventually. Or maybe she’d upload it to her “close friends” story on Hastygram once more people knew. The doctor also handed Lola another pamphlet, this time about the second trimester. Shoot. Bulky sweaters might work for now, but this wasn’t going to be able to stay a secret much longer. Neither were the medical bills…

Miles looked like he was thinking the same. “Wanna take a walk real quick?” Lola nodded and followed him outside. 

They sat down on a bench outside the building. The cold air felt good to Lola, a nice contrast from the stuffy waiting room. “You’re shivering,” Miles frowned, and Lola noticed she had goosebumps up and down her arms. Truthfully, she wasn’t sure if it was from the cold or nerves.

“No, no, just… it’s a little chilly.” 

Miles frowned. “Well, here.” He tossed his blue hoodie over her shoulders, and Lola couldn’t help but smile. It reminded her of the way he’d given her his t-shirt the night they slept together. Wearing his clothes just made her feel all snug and safe, even if they were three sizes too big on her. 

Miles gently reached for her hand. “I wanted to talk to you about something.”

“The bills,” Lola nodded, already knowing what he was going to say. “I know. We’ll tell my dad soon. Your parents too, I guess. I’m just waiting for the right-”

“Um,” Miles cut her off. “I mean, yeah. We do need to figure that out. But that wasn’t what I was going to say.”

“Oh.” Lola felt dumb.

“It’s just been on my mind a lot lately,” Miles said. He looked nervous, which also made Lola nervous in return. “I know I wasn’t the best, after we slept together. When Tristan woke up, everything just got so complicated. And I was… kind of a piece of shit.”

“Miles…”

“But, what happened that night between us — it wasn’t just sex to me. It meant something. You know that, right?” 

Lola nodded, a bit lost for words. She’d never thought of her and Miles as just sex either. Or else she wouldn’t have chosen him to be her first. But afterwards, when he cut all communication off outside the play, she’d second-guessed how much she’d really meant to him. If that night that was so special to her had even meant anything to him at all. 

“And it wasn’t just that night,” Miles continued. “Last semester, you saved my life. Knowing I would get to see your face at school every morning was the only thing that even got me out of bed. Everyone else just saw me as Tristan’s boyfriend — you were the only one who actually cared about how I was doing.” He paused to catch his breath. “And… you were the first person to say you were cool with me being bisexual. Tris was never okay with it. Did you know that?”

“I… didn’t,” Lola said. He’d always kind of put Tristan on this pedestal whenever he talked about him. Like his own needs and happiness didn’t matter as long as he was devoted to his boyfriend. And Lola couldn’t really say anything about that, she wasn’t going to say something negative about someone in a coma for god’s sake. But it did give her pause sometimes, the way he talked about Tristan. Once she’d asked Miles what he missed most about Tris, and all Miles could think of was, “Not being alone.” Lola didn’t have much experience with relationships, but she felt like there should be more to them than that. She knew he loved Tristan, but she couldn’t help but wonder if Miles had ever really been happy, even before the crash.

Miles sighed. “I guess what I’m trying to say is, you were never just a distraction, Lo. You were my hope.”

Lola froze, totally at a loss for words. Somehow this was both everything she’d wanted to hear and everything she’d been afraid of. As she’d told Miles that fateful night, she’d tried not to like him. But she did, dammit. 

Miles leaned in, his lips so close to hers. Lola wanted so badly to give in. But something in her pulled her back. “Wait,” she said, and she pulled away. “Stop. I can’t do this.”

Miles looked surprised, and a little hurt, by the sudden rejection. “I’m sorry... I thought...” He sighed. “I guess I misread things.”

Lola wanted Miles. She knew this, undoubtedly. But she didn’t want him like  _ this,  _ her pregnant and him fresh out of a tumultuous relationship. She couldn’t afford to be anyone’s second choice again and she didn’t think she had it in her to recover from another Hollingsworth heartbreak if things went south. “No, that’s not it... you’ve only just broken up with Tristan. And we just had that ultrasound and we both got all emotional. There’s so much going on. We’re not thinking clearly.”

Miles frowned. “For the first time, I feel like I am. Look, I tried to let go of what we had. I tried to convince myself it didn’t matter anymore now that Tris was awake. But I couldn’t. I thought staying with him was the right thing to do, but... it’s not. It’s not what I want. I want…” He swallowed hard. “I want  _ you _ .”

“I need you to prove it. Because you’re saying all these pretty words, but I need to know that it’s not just because of the baby. Because if it is...”

“It’s not. I swear. And look, this whole thing, us being parents, is really scary. I mean, shit, I’m terrified. But also... a part of me is kind of happy about it too. Is that weird to say?”

Lola couldn’t help but smile a little. “No,” she whispered. “Me too. I mean, I’m not happy that I’m gonna have to walk around school looking like a pufferfish and I’m really scared of what this means for my future, but... I’m happy it’s yours.”

And that was true. When she was with Miles, she felt  _ safe _ . When she looked at him, she saw the boy who killed a spider for her in the middle of the night at a sleepover when she was 12 and let her sleep on his floor afterwards because it was just so darn big and scary. She saw the boy who’d been so gentle and caring with her for her first time. The boy who had always been there.

And… Lola wanted that boy.

Miles smiled back, but then let go of her hand. The way he was looking at her reminded her of how she’d felt the day he broke things off between them after play rehearsal: understanding, but still heartbroken. “Well,” he said, a little bit of defeat in his voice, “I guess we should get back to Frankie.”

“Yeah,” Lola nodded. He walked towards the parking lot. She had meant to follow him, but her feet stayed firmly planted on the ground. There were a million reasons not to do this— Frankie, Tristan, the fact that her father was probably going to lock her away in a  _ Shrek  _ tower soon. 

But there was also one very good reason: she wanted to. “Miles. Wait!” 

He turned around and she sprinted towards him. She leaned in and kissed him harder than she ever had. He kissed her back and, even with her eyes closed, Lola could tell he was smiling. She had no idea what this meant or what the future held, but she knew this felt right.

Suddenly, their moment came to a halt and was interrupted by a loud  _ HONK.  _ They broke away from each other and turned to the source.

Frankie rolled down the window and smirked. “Get in already, weirdos. This isn’t Uber.”

Lola and Miles shared a glance and smiled. Nothing was normal… but somehow everything felt more okay than it had in a long time.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things continue to develop between Lola and Miles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys enjoy this long and juicy chapter! Please consider giving kudos and comments - we really appreciate every last one of you guys! ~ Eevee <3

The next morning, Lola woke up feeling like she was on a cloud. Actually, she’d literally dreamt she was on a cloud: a big, fluffy one. She was still replaying that kiss between her and Miles in her head over and over— the feeling hadn’t left her lips. They hadn’t officially talked and said they were together or anything yet, but for once, they were just putting their feelings out there and figuring it out. It was scary, and it felt a bit like jumping into the deep end of the pool, but it also felt natural and easy with Miles. Like still jumping into the deep end, but with a cute lifeguard.

As soon as she sat up though, that floating on a cloud feeling was quickly replaced by nausea. The baby was only around the size of a strawberry, but it felt like it was taking up every ounce of energy in Lola’s body. She’d thrown up twice at school this week, and she’d nearly fallen asleep cleaning tables at the Cantina the other day. What a  _ Lola  _ thing, she sighed to herself— she finally had the guy of her dreams, but she was also pregnant. There always had to be an asterisk.

“Mija! Breakfast!” her father’s voice bellowed from the hallway. 

“I’ll be right there!” Lola hollered back. She hopped off the bed and reached into her dresser for a clean sweater and pair of jeans, and…  _ oh _ , crap. She couldn’t button her jeans anymore. She tried to squeeze in one more time, then gave up and tossed a pair of leggings on instead.

She skipped into the kitchen and smiled at her father, trying to act as normal as possible. “Morning!”

“Are you alright?” Her dad piled an omelette onto her plate. “You look pale.”

“I’m fine!” Lola chirped, but it came out sounding half-hearted. The smell of the omelette wasn't exactly helping. Mr. Pacini looked like he was about to say something else, but then just went back to reading his Spanish newspaper. 

Lola studied her father as he read. Her dad was a good man— he couldn’t always fill the void that her mom had left, but he did his best. He had a soft heart, and it was easy to see why everyone at the Cantina adored him, Lola included. But he was also  _ so _ traditional. She didn’t want to keep things from him, but he made it hard sometimes to open up. 

It was times like this that Lola almost wished her mom was still around. Her mother wasn’t completely out of the picture: they kept in touch with monthly-ish phone calls and saw each other for maybe Christmas and her birthday. But her mom wasn’t really a  _ parent _ , not enough of one. When it came down to it, her dad was all she really had in that department.

Lola knew she had to play her cards just right with her father. Maybe she could test the waters a bit and see how he’d react if, say, a friend of hers got pregnant. “Dad…” she started, trembling a little.

“Mmm,” Mr. Pacini said. He was clearly only half-paying attention. 

“So, I heard a rumor at school the other day.” She picked up her fork and sliced her omelette, not because she was hungry, but because her hands were shaking too hard to keep still. “There’s this girl from… she was on the volleyball team with me. Apparently she’s pregnant.”

Mr. Pacini didn’t even set his newspaper down. “Goodness,” he muttered. “That’ll ruin the poor girl’s life.”

“Maybe it won’t,” Lola said, a bit more defensively than she’d meant.

“Trust me, Mija. Being a parent is hard enough as a grown-up.” He took a sip of his coffee and added, “I’m just glad I don’t have to worry about you getting into trouble like that.”

Before Lola could muster up a response, her phone chimed. It was a text from Frankie asking if she could come over. She was more than relieved to have an excuse to get out of the house, but she was mostly just relieved that Frankie was speaking to her again. And yeah, okay, she  _ was  _ excited about the thought of seeing Miles too. “I’m going to Frankie’s,” she told her father, and planted a light kiss on his cheek. “Thanks for breakfast.” She’d barely touched the omelette, but her father was way too buried in an article to notice. 

“Mhmm. Love you. Stay out of trouble.” 

_ Too late _ , Lola thought as she walked out of the kitchen wordlessly, her hand absent-mindedly caressing the fraction of a bump that she had acquired. Rubbing her stomach had started out as a comfort thing, mostly honestly as an attempt to relieve the annoying gas bubbles and nausea that had plagued her stomach ever since the pregnancy began. As the bump and her connection to Miles and this pregnancy continued to grow, however, she found herself more and more feeling like she was rubbing the  _ baby _ , not just her stomach. The action had already begun to feel a bit more intimate and intense, she couldn’t imagine how she’d feel once the life inside her started  _ moving _ . There were a lot of aspects of motherhood that Lola wasn’t sure how she was going to prepare herself for. 

…

Even though things at the ultrasound with Frankie had gone far better than expected, Lola was still nervous to spend time with her best friend again so soon. Sure, Frankie had visibly softened when she saw her niece or nephew for the first time, but there were still a lot of sensitive, sore subjects that the two girls needed closure on. Lola knew there were a lot of uncomfortable conversations in her future when she decided to keep the baby, but knowing that fact didn’t make approaching said conversations any easier. 

Lola approached the front door of the Hollingsworth mansion hesitantly. The front door had a large glass pane at the top, allowing anyone at the front door to get a peek into the house’s front living room. Lola found it so odd that a family with so many secrets would leave a transparent rectangle right smack dab in the middle of the front door, almost as if they were inviting anyone who walked up to look right in and take a peek. Lola, distracted by her own thoughts and peering into the empty room, jumped back when a figure suddenly appeared on the other side of the door. 

“Oh, Lola! What are  _ you _ doing here?” Mr. Hollingsworth caught Lola by surprise, speaking in his usual friendly but slightly patronizing tone. 

“Frankie asked me over.” Lola responded, holding her phone up as if it were evidence that she was invited. “Sorry to just drop in.” She added. Several things about Mr. Hollingsworth made her nervous.

Rather than immediately inviting Lola in and calling Frankie downstairs like most people would, he left Lola at the doorway, closing the door in her face slightly before calling loudly for Frankie. “Frankie! You have a visitor, can you please come down and get the door?” 

Lola found his behavior so odd. Didn’t he already technically get the door? Plus, considering he and Mrs. Hollingsworth were in the thick of their divorce proceedings, it was pretty weird that he was answering the door like he still lived here. Poor Miles, he had to be anxious as hell having him come around like this. 

Frankie made her way toward the door with less haste than Lola would’ve preferred given the uncomfortable circumstances, but Lola was just glad when Frankie arrived and relieved the awkwardness. Mr. Hollingsworth slinked away with nothing more than a slightly disapproving look toward Frankie. Lola never felt like Frankie’s dad was her biggest fan, but he seemed especially weird today. 

As soon as the two girls closed Frankie’s bedroom door, Lola spoke up. “A couple questions, if I may?” Frankie nodded, and Lola continued. “First off, why does your dad hate me today?” 

“He doesn’t hate you, he’s mad because today is supposed to be me and Hunter’s day with him, at least, according to that  _ family lawyer _ of his. I wasn’t exactly supposed to invite friends over. But Hunter ditched breakfast for an exclusive Fortnite event or something, so the day was already a bust.” 

“Which leads me to my second question… Why did you invite me over?” Lola inquired. 

Frankie placed herself on her perfectly-made bed, then shrugged dramatically. “Because I wanted to hang out with my best friend and catch up, I guess?” 

“I’m still your best friend after all of this?” Lola allowed a smile to play across her features as she joined her on the bed. “I mean…  _ through _ all of this, I guess?” She had to acknowledge that this journey was far from over. 

“I don’t like it, and I don’t particularly want to hear every detail of you and my older bro’s  _ spawn _ ,” Frankie scrunched her nose, still clearly very uncomfortable with the concept. “But… with a little bit more background information, and after talking to Miles and seeing you guys together at the doctor... It’s not a mistake. And I’m sorry I said it was, Lo.” 

Lola pulled Frankie into a hug. Not many words were said, but the support and love Frankie was showing finally made Lola start to feel like things were going to be okay. It had been weeks since Lola felt like anyone in the world other than Miles would truly be on her side once they found out everything. It was comforting as hell to have Frankie back. 

“So, I know you two are keeping this on the DL for now, but… who are you gonna tell next?” Frankie asked.

“I don’t know,” Lola sighed. “I know I need to tell my dad soon, but I want to put it off as long as possible. At least, as long as he doesn’t notice first…” She looked down at her long-sleeve top and frowned, suddenly noticing how it accentuated her stomach. “Oh god. I’m not showing already, am I?!”

“Mmm, not  _ really _ ,” Frankie said. “But if I were you, I wouldn’t wear that top around my house. Or at school. By the way, is Shay on your list next or what?”

“I haven’t really thought about how to tell Shay,” Lola admitted. It was no secret that they’d had a rocky last few months of friendship, with the whole Tiny ordeal and everything. Plus, Shay could also be incredibly judgmental, arguably even more so than Frankie when it came to matters of sex. Lola didn’t like keeping this huge secret from her, but she also wasn’t sure she could handle judgement from another best friend right now. She wished she could just pause everything until she felt ready. “I guess I’ll figure it out. But keep it on the DL still, okay?”

“Sure,” Frankie shrugged. She sighed a little, still clearly getting used to this whole situation. “So…do you like, feel pregnant yet?”

“Um, sort of?” Lola said. “The constant feeling like I’m going to barf makes it kind of hard to ignore. But I still forget there’s really something like,  _ growing _ in here,” she added, motioning to her very small bump. She eyed her best friend and raised her brow. “All these questions and you haven’t asked one thing about me and your brother,” she said with a nervous laugh.

“Like I said… I don’t particularly want to hear all the details,” Frankie made a face. “But, are you guys together now?”

“That’s kinda what I need to find out,” Lola said meekly. “Is he around?”

…..

When Lola walked into Miles’ bedroom, he was sprawled out on his bed, chewing on the end of a pencil and flipping through a thick stack of papers. He was in a bit of a frenzy, clearly trying to distract himself from his dad being in the house. “Lola,” he glanced up, an immediate smile on his face. Lola felt a warm glow inside— she’d missed being the reason behind his smile.

“Hey,” Lola smiled back, casual. “Whatcha up to?”

“I’m uh, working on play revisions,” Miles said. “Don’t worry, most of your lines are still the same. But some of this Coma Boy stuff just doesn’t make sense.”

“Well, your co-writer is here if you need any help,” Lola said cheerfully. She took a seat next to him on the bed, feeling bold today. It felt nice being alone with him in his room, but it was also kind of weird just sitting on his bed again like this… the bed their baby had been conceived in.

“Mmm. Actually, I think it’s time for a break…” He eyed her lips and leaned in, and Lola’s heart immediately sped up. 

She kissed him back, forgetting everything else for a minute. Damn. Miles Hollingsworth  _ was  _ a great kisser. And this felt good.  _ Really  _ good. But as much as Lola wanted to just give into her hormones right this second, she also needed answers. Security. She slowly pulled away. “Not to sound like a niner, but… what exactly are we?”

“Well, uh,” Miles said, and he looked just as nervous. “I was hoping you’re… my girlfriend? If you want to be.”

_ Girlfriend.  _ Miles Hollingsworth wanted her to be his girlfriend. It didn’t matter that she was already pregnant with his baby, the question still came as a shock to her, in a good way. She wasn’t the type to trust easily, and this situation was still messy as hell with a lot of challenges ahead, but… there was no one she felt safer jumping into this pool with. “Yes! Yes, I want to be your…  _ yes _ .”

Miles beamed. “I want you to know that I want it to be different this time,” he said. “With us, I mean. It’s totally up to you when you wanna disclose the pregnancy stuff, but I don’t wanna hide our relationship. There’s already rumors flying around about us, so I just think... fuck it, we might as well let people talk.” 

“You really want that?” Lola said, her eyes nearly brimming with tears. She was still kind of hesitant to go public, and a part of her honestly felt a little guilty for the way all this had happened. She didn’t want to rub their new relationship in everyone’s faces, but she was also tired of hiding. Miles wasn’t with Tristan anymore. There was no reason they couldn’t try to enjoy a little normalcy as a couple before putting the baby bombshell out there, right?

“Yeah, I do,” Miles said. “I feel like I’ve spent so much time trying to be what other people want and trying to make it work with the wrong people. But I’m really happy now with you, Lola. I’ve never felt more sure of anything.” 

“Me too.” This time when Miles kissed her, she didn’t pull away.

…..

Lola laid against Miles’ chest and closed her eyes. She let out a content sigh as he ran his fingers through her bouncy blue curls. It was kind of strange — this whole sex thing was still pretty new to Lola, and she would have been insecure as hell with anyone else. But with Miles, she didn’t hesitate one bit. Sure, it was partly her hormones being on overdrive, but it was also because it was  _ Miles. _ Being with him didn’t feel scary, it just felt right. Safe, even. And it was a thousand times better now that Miles was actually hers, that she knew for sure he wanted to be with her. Lola didn’t know exactly what she was feeling — it seemed too soon to call it love… but whatever she was feeling, she was sure she’d never felt anything this strong before.

Miles wandered his hand across her stomach. “Whoa. I can feel a little bump,” he whispered, eyes wide. 

His words snapped Lola out of her dreamy state and back to reality. Even after the ultrasound, the thought that a baby,  _ their  _ baby, was in there was still overwhelming. “Yeah… I’ve noticed,” she sighed. 

“I’m sorry that this isn’t… perfect,” Miles said, tracing his hand over the bump. There was a twinge of guilt in his voice. “And I’m sorry you have to deal with pain and being sick and everything.”

“It’s not your fault,” Lola said, brushing her fingers against his. “Okay, it  _ kinda  _ is,” she added with a soft laugh. “But it’s fine. It’s just, you know, how it is. Being pregnant and all.” The word still felt weird rolling off her tongue. “But, I don’t regret the decision we made. And, totally bonkers circumstances aside… I’m happy, Miles,” she said, and she meant it. “Really.” 

Just as Miles leaned in to kiss her, the door swung open, startling them both. They quickly broke apart and sat up as Mr. Hollingsworth entered the room, looking even more sour than he had before. “Working hard on the play, I see...” he said sharply, obvious disapproval in his tone. “Lola, didn’t you say you were here for Frankie?”

To Lola’s surprise, Miles didn’t slink away, but instead put his arm around her. “Actually, Dad,” he said, and Lola didn’t think she’d ever heard him speak so calmly in front of his father, “Lola is my girlfriend now.”

Lola tried to give a nervous smile, but all she could do was sit there frozen. When Miles said he didn’t want to hide their relationship this time, he meant it. 

Mr. Hollingsworth just shook his head. “Yes, well,” he sighed in that ‘ _ I just don’t get you’  _ voice, “Whatever you’re doing in here, keep it down.” He walked back into the hallway, muttering something under his breath.

Miles smiled at Lola. “There, I just told the scariest person,” he said, his voice a little shaky, but still sounding sure of himself. “So maybe going public won’t be so scary after all.”

“As long as we keep  _ this _ part under wraps for a while,” Lola added, nodding down at her growing stomach. She planted a kiss on Miles’ cheek. “I’m proud of you.” 

“Now… where were we?” Miles leaned in to kiss her.

Lola kissed him back for a second, but then paused. As much as she still wanted to fool around with Miles, and as happy as she was that he wasn’t hiding anything, Mr. Hollingsworth’s appearance had kind of soured the mood. Plus, she knew the longer they stayed in Miles’ room, the more questions Frankie would have to interrogate her with later. “Um, don’t take this the wrong way, but… it’s kinda weird hooking up with you while your whole family’s home. Including my best friend.”

“We could go somewhere else,” Miles suggested. He gave her a devilish smirk. “Boiler room?”

“Ew,” Lola laughed. The boiler room was mostly a Degrassi thing before her time, but she’d still heard stories. Including a couple rumored ones about Miles, which she wasn’t particularly eager to imagine. Him being more experienced than her didn’t bother her, not really, but she still didn’t like to think about it. Was this what it felt like to be jealous? Lola kind of loved it.

“I’m kidding,” Miles clarified. “But can I take you out to ice cream? I know we’ve got a lot of serious stuff to figure out, and I know we’re doing this all backwards, but I wanna at least give you the perfect first date.” 

“Ice cream sounds  _ perfect _ ,” Lola smiled. It was the most simple date she could think of, and she wouldn’t have it any other way. For once, she just wanted to spend the afternoon with her boyfriend, being normal teenagers. She repeated that back to herself in her head, still kind of in a cloud: She was going on a date with Miles. Her boyfriend.  _ Miles Hollingsworth was her boyfriend and he was taking her on a date. _

They walked downstairs hand-in-hand, ready to head out for their date. “Whoa,” Frankie observed from the living room couch. For once, she didn’t seem grossed out at their slight PDA. “I take it your talk went well?”

Lola blushed. “We’re… trying out this dating-for-real thing.”

“Uh-Huh,” Frankie said with a slight smirk. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but you guys are actually… kinda cute together. I mean, you look really happy.”

“Thanks, Franks,” Lola smiled, more than a little relieved to have her best friend’s approval after all this. Other than Miles, Frankie had always been Lola’s rock through everything. All of the difficult things that laid ahead in Lola’s future felt a little less scary now that Frankie was in her corner again.

“Yeah, yeah. Just no making out in front of me, ever. And  _ brother _ , I swear to God, if you hurt her…”

“That’s the last thing I wanna do,” Miles said, and squeezed Lola’s hand tight. 

Lola sighed happily under her breath. Absolutely nothing about any of this was normal, but she felt more safe and secure than she had in a long time. Baby situation aside… she had to admit that it felt  _ really _ good to be Miles Hollingsworth’s girlfriend. 


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Miles and Lola have their first official date at The Dot.

The Dot wasn’t super crowded when Lola and Miles arrived, much to Lola’s relief. As nice as it was to not have to sneak around, she didn’t particularly want to run into all of Degrassi on their first date. 

“A booth for two, please,” Miles said, arm around Lola. The way he spoke so confidently was sexy, but also kind of intimidating. Here Lola was overthinking every move, while everything seemed to come so naturally to him. He seemed so sure of himself, so sure of everything. Lola just hoped that he was just as sure about being with her.

Miles picked up on her nervousness. “Is The Dot okay?” he frowned as they slid into a booth in the back. “We could go someplace else if you want.”

“No, no, this is fine!” Lola assured him. “It’s just… we’re finally on a real date, you know? It’s almost weird.” She tried to tell herself to play it cool, but the words just kept coming out. “I mean, I’ve probably dreamt about this moment since like, Grade 7.”

Miles grinned. “You had a crush on me for that long?”

“Off and on, but… yeah, pretty much,” Lola admitted, her cheeks turning pink. Miles was still doing that crooked smile of his, and it made her nervous as hell. “Don’t let it get to your head,” she added jokingly.

Miles just laughed. “Hey, it wasn’t one-sided. I didn’t mind seeing you in that Power Cheer uniform.”

“Gonna be awhile before I can fit into that again,” Lola sighed under her breath. 

“You look just as cute now,” Miles clarified quickly, trying to assure her. He reached for her hand across the booth, looking all nervous suddenly, like he was worried he’d said the wrong thing. It was kind of endearing actually, seeing him get a little tongue-tied. It reassured Lola that she wasn’t a complete spaz, that he was just as worried about messing up. “Cuter, actually. Beautiful.”

“You look cute too,” Lola teased, trying to keep from blushing. She eyed his outfit up-and-down, observing the classic Miles Hollingworth look: a blue patterned button-up, a pair of old shoes that looked a smidge big on him, and, as always, those damn salmon pants. If Lola had seen this outfit on anyone else, she would have called in to What Not to Wear, but on Miles, it was, well, cute. It was just him, and she liked how unapologetically himself he was. It was something that had drawn her to him from the very beginning, back when he was just a Grade 8 with a big, flirty smile and a tendency to show off.

A waiter came by just then and Lola’s appetite suddenly came roaring back. “What can I get you two?”

“Umm,” Lola quickly flipped through the desserts section, “Can I get a sundae with two scoops of cookies and cream, whipped cream and cherries?” She felt her stomach rumble. “Oh! And a scoop of rainbow sherbet in between.”

The waiter scribbled down Lola’s order, giving her an odd look. Miles just shook his head laughing. “I’ll just have a scoop of chocolate.”

“Interesting, uh, choice of ice cream,” Miles grinned to Lola once the waiter left.

Lola whacked his hand playfully. “What? I’m eating for two,” she said. “But honestly, it’s not that far off from my usual order. It’s so hard to choose between chocolatey and fruity, so why not both?”

“You speak my language,” Miles smirked. He kissed her hand. “But you know, I do like that we’re kinda different.”

“Yeah, me too,” Lola smiled. “Mi amor.” All of the nervousness and doubt she’d had earlier had melted away. There was no one else in the world she’d rather be eating ice cream with. 

Their orders arrived, and Lola dug into her sundae right away. “Oh my god, so good!” Everything just tasted better to her nowadays. It was true what they said about weird cravings.

Miles snuck a bite of hers. “Mmm, not bad,” he smacked his lips.

“You have a chocolate mustache,” Lola giggled.

“Oh yeah? How’s it look?”

Once Miles finished his ice cream, he excused himself to go to the bathroom real quick. Lola opened her phone while she waited for him to come back, seeing a text from Frankie. How’s your big date? Don’t go getting pregnant. Lola rolled her eyes and laughed, scrolling to find an emoji to send back in response. 

“Lola?” 

Lola glanced up at the sound of the familiar voice. “Zoe!” she said, surprised. Even after everything, Zoe Rivas’ presence still kind of intimidated her. She wasn’t sure if she should be nervous about running into her while on a date with Miles – after all, she was still Tristan’s best friend. But also, if it wasn’t for Zoe, Lola sure as hell wouldn’t be sitting in this booth sharing ice cream with Miles now. Honestly, the fact that any of this had even worked out at all was kind of thanks to Zoe. If she hadn’t convinced Lola to give Miles another chance, who knows where they’d be now? “What are you- uh, how are you…?” 

“I’m fine,” Zoe said, and her tone was surprisingly warm. “I’m just waiting to meet Rasha. I saw you and Miles. I take it that talking to him helped?”

“Yeah… you could say that,” Lola said meekly. 

“I’m not mad, you know,” Zoe said. “I mean, helping Tristan heal is still my priority. But I’m actually glad you and Miles are working things out. Miles seems really… actually, I don’t think I’ve ever seen him this happy.”

“Thanks for getting me to talk to him,” Lola acknowledged, and offered a small smile. “Really. Without you, I wouldn’t have… we wouldn’t…” Lola decided to just stop talking and pulled out her phone. She scrolled through her photos and showed one to Zoe, figuring pictures spoke louder than words here. Beginning to openly acknowledge the life growing inside of her was both nerve-wracking but admittedly exciting. She knew she was probably going to be one of those moms who Hastygrammed everything.

Zoe’s eyes widened as she examined the ultrasound picture. “Wow. Well, let’s hope it gets your looks.” She handed Lola her phone back, some more warmth in her expression now. “Like I said, I’m not exactly about to become captain of the Miles and Lola… Mola… ship or whatever. But I’m glad I could help.” 

Miles walked up just then. “Well, well,” he beamed, “if it isn’t our brilliant stage manager. Don’t worry, I’m working on those scene revisions. I’ll get them to you by Tuesday.” He slid back into the booth and placed his arm around Lola, like there was nothing odd about this situation at all. The Miles way of doing things.

“Monday,” Zoe corrected him, her tongue as sharp as ever. “I gotta go. Rasha’s gonna be here soon. I’ll see you guys at rehearsal.” She waved goodbye and walked off. She glanced back and threw a small smile Lola’s way. Lola smiled back. She knew she wasn’t going to have a whole lot of people supporting her over the next few months, and she was going to need support wherever she could get it. Even if it came from the most unlikely sources. 

They finished their ice cream and got the check. Miles of course insisted on paying for everything. “Don’t even think about it,” he’d said to Lola when she tried to pull out her wallet. She knew it was just ice cream and that the Hollingsworths had way more money than her, but she still felt like he was spoiling her. 

“So, what’d you think? Okay for a first date?” Miles asked her on the way out.

“Hmm…” Lola pretended to think about it. “Yeah, I’d say it was a pretty good first date,” she teased. She stood on her tippy-toes and planted a kiss on his cheek, or at least as close as she could get. She guessed now she knew what they meant by “feeling butterflies.” 

Just then, there was a noise from across the restaurant that made both Lola and Miles freeze: a baby cry. It was so faint that Lola couldn’t even tell exactly where it was coming from, but it was still enough to catch her off guard. She and Miles locked eyes, and he hugged her suddenly. He just held her for a second, and it felt like he could tell exactly what she was feeling without her having to say a word. Miles could always sense what Lola needed. She was really beginning to be able to rely on that comfort. 

As wonderful as this first official date was... it didn’t change how scary their new reality was going to be. Lola was grateful as hell to have Miles — and Frankie, heck, even Zoe — through all this.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola finally lets Shay in on her secret.

“Stop tugging at your shirt,” Frankie chastised Lola for the third time since the two girls had arrived at school. “You look cute.” Frankie could try her best to reassure her, but Lola was in full stress mode. Now that she was bordering thirteen weeks pregnant, none of Lola’s pants buttoned comfortably anymore. She had tried to hide wearing pants unzipped and unbuttoned to school earlier in the week with a long, flowy shirt but she had gotten called out by Baaz for her fly being down. So now, in an attempt to avoid more attention being drawn, Lola had to resort to sweatpants, which felt  _ very  _ un-Lola like. Giving up her fashion wasn’t an aspect of pregnancy she’d considered, and it was really bumming her out to think about having to survive in ugly maternity clothes for the next several months. More importantly though, she felt like she was running out of time to keep this a secret.

“The fabric keeps riding up.” Lola snapped back, frustration and anxiety laced through her tone. “My stupid huge stomach keeps getting stupider and huger.”

In reality, Lola’s bump was still pretty tiny and undetectable to the naked eye. The empire waist yellow top Lola had chosen, however, was definitely not doing her any favors. She had spent almost forty-five minutes trying on everything in her closet that morning and came out thinking that this was the best option. Frankie’s hesitant reaction when Lola first arrived and asked how she looked had sent Lola into a bit of a spin.

“Do you want me to see if Miles has a jacket in his locker or something?” Frankie offered a half-hearted solution. 

“Nah, he’s at play practice…” Lola offered up a quick excuse. She and Miles had agreed that they weren’t going to hide their relationship, but she was still a bit hesitant to broadcast it to the whole school. She knew as soon as word spread, so would rumors. Lola was usually pretty good at not caring what others thought, but her hormones and the stakes were a bit higher than usual. “I’ll just deal.”

“Aren’t you two officially together now?” Frankie questioned. “Like, he’s your…  _ don’t make me say it _ … now?” 

Lola laughed a little at Frankie, who had now made it a point every time she spoke about Miles and Lola to poke fun at the disgust she felt toward the pair that was slowly melting away. “Yeah, he’s my boyfriend, but… I dunno. I don’t wanna shove it in everyone’s face by wearing his hoodie. That’d just draw  _ more _ attention, right? I don’t want to put our names in the rumor mill.” 

“You’re kinda right.” Frankie shrugged, removing her bag from her shoulders and placing it on the floor for a moment. “Are people gonna think we’re dating if you wear  _ my _ hoodie?” She unzipped the oversized hoodie she was wearing and offered it up to Lola. 

Lola hesitated for a moment. She already felt like a bum in these sweats, and Frankie’s burnt orange hoodie would absolutely clash with the shirt she was wearing… but hiding her growing stomach and concealing the secret  _ had _ to be worth the fashion faux pas. “Thanks, Franks.” Lola spoke, grabbing the hoodie and quickly covering her torso. “You’re a lifesaver.” 

“Guys!” A familiar voice called from the other side of the hallway.

“Shay!” Both girls spoke in panicked unison. Lola and Frankie knew that their ability to evade Shay was going to be short-lived. There was only so long they could shut out their third best friend before Shay started getting suspicious. It wasn’t that Lola  _ wanted  _ to hide stuff from Shay. She just didn’t want to risk anyone else finding out and the whole school knowing before she was ready. 

Shay raised her brow at Lola’s outfit. “Uh, trying out a new style, Lo?”

“All my jeans were dirty. And then I forgot a cardigan, and I couldn’t risk getting dress coded,” Lola said quickly. “If I got another detention, my dad would  _ flip _ ,” she added, secretly wishing that was her actual biggest problem. “Luckily, Franks lent me her hoodie.”

“It’s a good thing I’m always here to save you,” Frankie said. Lola shot her a look. 

“Uh-huh,” Shay said, unconvinced. “Listen, is something up? I feel like you guys are never around lately. Like you’re avoiding me. Or you’re avoiding telling me something.”

Frankie and Lola exchanged looks. Neither of them had ever been particularly good liars. And, as much drama as the three of them had been through together, they weren’t used to flat-out keeping  _ secrets  _ like this. Sooner or later, one of them was going to crack, Lola realized. Maybe this whole charade wasn’t worth it. Maybe it was better if Shay just knew already. “Let’s go talk somewhere,” Lola finally said.

…

“So…” Shay broke the silence between the three girls the moment they were completely alone in the girls’ locker room. “Are you and Miles dating?” She directed the question towards Lola. 

Lola liked to think that she had at least a little bit of subtlety in her, but Shay’s immediate guess made her start to wonder if the whole school knew already. 

“...Yes.” Lola replied nervously. “How did you know?”

“Tiny saw you guys together at The Dot. He texted me immediately. I thought about texting you and asking you about it, but I figured I’d get a more direct response in person. Neither of you have been returning my texts lately. So… is that it?”

Here it was. A chance to share her news and get a genuine reaction. That moment had been robbed from her when it came to telling Frankie, so this was her first real chance to  _ tell _ someone. 

“I’ve got something to show you.” Lola pulled her phone from her back pocket and scrolled to the ultrasound photo, handing it to Shay. 

“That’s not yours, right?” Shay’s eyes were wider than either girl had ever seen before. “That’s yours.” Shay confirmed, grabbing the phone and looking up at Lola, then back at the photo. “So when you took that test a while ago, you were…”

“Pregnant. With Miles’ baby.” Lola confirmed. It was getting slightly easier to say every time she said it. The fact that Miles was her boyfriend now also helped. All she had to do was forget that she was sixteen with no money and no way her dad was gonna be cool with this. “I’m sorry I lied, Shay. I felt so weird keeping something so big from my bestie.”

“How long has Frankie known?” Shay seemed a little hurt that she had been kept out of the loop. 

“Not long at all. I swear.” Lola responded. 

Shay took a moment, seemingly reflecting for a moment on the bombshell. “I get it.” She said. “Are you… sure you can handle this, Lo?”

“She can,” Frankie cut in. “I doubted her, because this whole situation is weird…  _ especially  _ with my brother, but if anyone can handle it, it’s Miles and Lola. I’ve seen them both step up a lot just within the past couple of weeks or so. Miles is actually making mature decisions for once.” 

“That  _ is  _ weird.” Shay noted. “The Miles making mature decisions part.” She clarified. “And the pregnancy, if I’m being honest.” 

Lola smiled slightly. “You’re not wrong.” She had definitely gotten a lot less sensitive and defensive since all of this started. At this point, knowing the storm that was coming, there wasn’t time or energy in Lola’s day for petty drama and worrying what everyone thought. “Wanna see something weirder?” She offered, her fingers teasing the zipper of her borrowed hoodie. 

Shay nodded, still seemingly in a state of disbelief. “Why not? Can’t get weirder.” 

Lola watched Shay’s expression carefully as she unzipped the hoodie and dramatically revealed her microscopic bump. Shay squinted when Lola’s clothed stomach was revealed. 

“You’re still tiny. Are you guys playing a prank on me or something?” 

It sort of boosted Lola’s confidence to know that Shay didn’t immediately think she looked pregnant. When Lola looked in the mirror, her eyes were automatically drawn to every little physical change that pregnancy was causing. The way she saw her flaws was like when she had a bad zit, but a million times worse. Probably because of the hormones. 

Lola hastily lifted her shirt, flashing her slightly swollen bare belly for Shay. This time, Shay’s eyes widened a bit. Lola could tell, Shay finally fully believed it. 

“You’re actually pregnant.” Shay stated. 

“Indeed.” Lola confirmed. “And I’m only getting more pregnant every day. Which means I’m running out of time to keep things quiet.” 

“I won’t tell.” Shay promised. 

“Not even Tiny?” Frankie cut in once again. 

Shay hesitated. “Tiny and I talk about everything.” 

“Not me being pregnant. Not before I’m ready to tell people.” Lola’s tone got serious. “Seriously, Shay. You can’t.”

Her body language still hesitant, Shay nodded. “Okay. But when are you telling people? I suck at keeping secrets from him. And my parents. And you know my mom wouldn’t stay silent if she found out about this…” 

Suddenly, Lola remembered the many reasons why she didn’t want to tell Shay yet. Shay was level-headed, honest and smart, but her track record with secrets and schemes was subpar to say the least. 

“Soon. We’re gonna tell our parents sometime in the next week or so.” Lola said. 

“How are things under control if you guys haven’t told an adult?” Shay’s concern seemed to grow. 

Frankie spoke up. “They’ve been to the doctor more than once. I even went with them for the ultrasound. Miles is 17, Lola is 16. They’re basically adults.” 

“But they’re not. I’m not trying to attack you guys, I’m happy that you’re happy, Lo. I just don’t want to see this blow up in your face. I’ve heard too many teen parent horror stories from my mom. The sooner you know where you have support, the better you can prepare for what you’re actually gonna be going through with the baby.” 

Shay’s words struck Lola. She was right. This definitely wasn’t the reaction she was hoping for, since she knew that there were going to be endless lectures in her future for the next...eternity, but Shay was right. Even though talking to her father and the Hollingsworth parents was literally the last thing she wanted to do, pushing that next step back further and further wouldn’t make things stop progressing. Both of them were terrified of what their parents would say, but the sooner she and Miles knew what support they would or wouldn’t be receiving, the better for their baby. 

“Why you gotta be so mature all the time, Shay?” Lola pulled Shay close and wrapped her arm around her two best friends. “And so  _ right _ . Ugh, it’s annoying.” Lola teased. 

The three girls all hugged one another tight. Lola was so grateful to have real, close friends, especially during a chaotic time like this. 

“Just please keep things quiet, just for a few more days. We’ll tell our parents, then the world. Promise.” Lola offered her pinky for Shay to interlock and promise. Shay obliged. 

“I promise.” Shay disconnected their pinkies and moved her hand to hover over Lola’s stomach. “Can I… feel it?” 

Lola nodded, allowing Shay to rest her hand on her stomach through her shirt. “I guess I gotta get used to people wanting to touch this, huh?” 

“Probably.” Frankie smiled. “Maybe you should charge. That’d be a way to raise baby funds.” 

All three girls erupted into laughter. “Somehow… I think we’ll find another way.” Lola said, bringing her friends into one last tight hug. 


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frankie makes a decision about her relationship with Jonah. She and Esme grow closer.

Now that Shay finally knew Lola’s secret, a huge weight was lifted off of Frankie’s shoulders. She no longer needed to tip-toe and avoid one of her closest friends, along with people like Tiny and Zig by extension, which made it a lot easier to walk through the hallways without constantly looking over her shoulder. 

Her focus on the whole Miles and Lola drama had been a perfect distraction for all of the other things going on in her life. So much so that she had almost completely forgotten that she was on a break with Jonah. The two had just sort of...left one another alone for the past couple weeks. It was weird, especially for Frankie. She knew that if her mind weren’t plagued with a million other concerns, like how her entire family dynamic was about to change, she’d probably obsess over Jonah’s every move. Now… it all just felt so foreign. The things that hurt her so much about Jonah just a few mere weeks ago suddenly felt like such small peanuts in comparison to what the future held. 

“Hey, you.” Jonah’s voice entered Frankie’s space unexpectedly, interrupting the bubble of distraction and thought that she had built around herself. “Haven’t heard from you in a couple of days. Wanna catch lunch or something?” 

Jonah was showing more interest in Frankie than he had since their break had started. Maybe the fact that she was unintentionally ignoring him had drawn him in. Distance supposedly made the heart grow fonder, at least that was what Frankie had always heard. She had never been able to keep her chill long enough to give Jonah distance before. Maybe incredibly distracting drama was all they needed for their relationship to find clarity, Frankie thought. 

“I… promised Lola I’d meet her for lunch.” Frankie came up with a quick excuse. 

“Coulda sworn I heard her and your brother making plans to raid the caf for burrito day at our play meeting this morning.” Jonah spoke in a teasing tone. The same tone he’d used to condescend Frankie into falling for him in the first place. At one point he was irritating, then endearing… Now, Frankie thought, he was sort of teetering toward irritating again. 

“I’m meeting them.” Frankie shot back, unintentionally allowing her annoyance to show. “We’re all friends.”

Jonah raised his eyebrows, seeming intrigued by Frankie’s fiery tone. “Lola and Miles seem like more than friends lately. Are you sure your brother and bestie aren’t sneaking around behind your back?” 

“Why are you being a provocative jerk?” Frankie questioned Jonah. 

“Why are you still so mad at me?” Jonah matched Frankie’s tone. “It’s seeming more and more like you just want nothing to do with me anymore. In the past you’d at least text me, or like… creep on my FaceRange pics at one in the morning, but this time… nothing. I’m getting nothing from you, Franks. Do you want this break to be more than just a break?” 

“Like… a break up?” Frankie dared to vocalize it. The concept was scary, but it was no longer terrifying. Something had switched inside of her. She no longer felt like desperately seeking Jonah’s love and approval was worth it. It just seemed… useless. “I think that might be the best call. I’m sorry, Jonah.” 

Frankie was surprised at how sure of her decision she was, but something in her gut told her this was the right decision. She didn’t need Jonah anymore. She didn’t even really feel like she  _ wanted _ him. 

Jonah examined Frankie’s face for signs that this was some sort of prank or test to see what he’d say, but Frankie just nodded, confirming her decision. 

“If that’s how you feel.” Jonah’s tone went colder. He was never the type to beg for another chance. That was usually Frankie’s territory. “So you’re a hundred percent over me?” 

“I don’t know about that,” Frankie answered honestly. “It’ll definitely take some time to fully get over what we had. But…” She paused for longer than originally intended. Something - or  _ someone _ had caught her eye. Esme Song was prancing down the hallway with Zig following behind like a puppy dog. 

“But what?” Jonah spoke up, reminding Frankie of his existence. 

Frankie’s eyes followed Esme for a moment longer before her gaze snapped back to Jonah, her now  _ ex _ -boyfriend. “Things have changed. I have a lot of...new stuff going on. And a lot of growing up to do. I think it’ll be good for both of us.” Frankie rested her hand on Jonah’s shoulder, attempting to comfort him without getting too intimate or giving him the wrong idea. “Now, I gotta go talk to someone. Thanks, and… I’m sorry.” Frankie knew her last words were lackluster, but her focus was honestly elsewhere right now. Between everything she had going on in her life now and everything her future seemed to promise, Jonah was something she was comfortably leaving in her rearview mirror. 

Leaving Jonah in the dust, Frankie sped up her pace to catch up to Esme and Zig. She joined Zig in following Esme as she bounced around the halls excitedly. 

“So… what are we celebrating?” Frankie struck up a conversation with Zig, who was just admiring Esme as he walked with a goofy smile on his face. 

“Esme got an A on her math midterm.” Zig beamed with pride. It was cute how supportive he was of Esme. Not that Frankie thought Zig was cute…

Esme ran up and grabbed Frankie’s cheek, pulling it slightly before Frankie resisted . “Not just an A, an A+. And extra, extra credit.”

Frankie smiled. Esme was so magnetizing when she was in a good mood. “So basically you kicked math’s ass.” She remarked. 

“And made it my bitch.” Esme added, then motioned as if she was spanking the air. 

Mrs. Grell passed by, witnessing the slightly lewd gesture, and made a disapproving face. “Language, Esme.” She warned, but quickly lightened her demeanor. “But congratulations on your results. It’s good to see you doing well.” 

As soon as Mrs. Grell exited the immediate area, Esme rolled her eyes. “Vibe killer. And that’s why I avoid that witch every time I see her in the hall. Anytime she’s barging my way looking like she wants to reform me, I divert my path.”

Zig chimes in. “Grell has sort of unintentionally inspired a ton of ditch days. Esme avoids her like the plague.” 

“She put you and Tiny in that rubber room. It’s degrading, and totally a form of public shaming. How is it acceptable to dedicate an entire area of the school to the kids that you deem ‘troubled?’ Sectioning you off like that… it’s like prison.” 

“Esme’s soapbox, get your tickets here.” Zig made a joke, causing Esme to scoff. 

“Whatever.” Esme’s mood quickly turned sour. Her attention turned to Frankie. “Wanna go get some celebratory pretzels at the mall?” 

Without much need for contemplation, Frankie agreed. Esme was admittedly the only one she had really been able to feel even slightly at ease around recently outside of Lola, who was a little caught up in her own drama as of late. The concept of just kicking back with a pretzel and someone as interesting as Esme, not having to think about her life or the problems of those around her… 

“Why are we still here?” Frankie asked with a smile taking over her face. 

“You’re speaking my language, Hollingsworth. Let’s blow this popsicle stand.” Esme pointed her words toward Zig with a bit of a tone. Apparently the soapbox remark had really gotten under her skin. That was one thing Frankie noticed about Esme. Every emotion seemed to be cranked up to eleven. Before Frankie could ponder too much on how chaotic that must feel, Esme snuck her arm between the crook of Frankie’s elbow and interlaced their arms together. “I need a pretzel with extra mustard, stat.” 

The two girls walked away from Zig without a formal goodbye. Frankie looked back for a moment, but Zig didn’t seem too phased. Maybe he was used to Esme abruptly exiting. Whatever the case, Zig wasn’t Frankie’s problem. He wasn’t her boyfriend.  _ Nobody was.  _ It felt freeing to let go and focus on what she wanted for herself for once. “I think that can be arranged,” Frankie said, gripping her arm tightly against Esme’s and beaming from ear-to-ear. 

…

“My mouth needed a salty pretzel dipped in mustard like, twenty minutes ago.” Esme whined. 

“ _ Please  _ stop telling me what your mouth needs. I will provide, I promise.” 

They had arrived at the mall a few minutes prior, but Frankie was struggling to park the car. “We’ve just gotta get within these stupid lines…”

“If I don’t get fed soon, hangry Esme comes out. That’s hungry Esme  _ and  _ angry Esme. Two of everyone’s least favorite Esme. You don’t want to see that, I promise. Our budding friendship will not survive.” 

It made Frankie crack a smile to think that Esme was concerned about preserving the friendship they had been slowly cultivating. If someone had told Frankie a year ago that Esme would be her new friend prospect, she would’ve told them that they were crazier than Esme. Now that she had spent a bit of time with Esme, though, her perception was definitely changing. She just needed to get the girl a pretzel pronto. 

Esme impatiently reached her hands across to touch the steering wheel, resting her perfectly manicured fingers on Frankie’s hands. “Just… turn the wheel to the right more. Like this. You’re just a little crooked. You gotta cut the wheel quick and tight to get it straight.” 

Within only a few seconds, Frankie was parked perfectly.

“I much prefer Esme’s driving school to Jonah’s. He was always so impatient.” Frankie didn’t mean to bring up her ex, it just slipped out. “Maybe you could finally be the one who fixes my foul parallel parking. I’ve gotten notes on my windshield about it.” 

“I think…” Esme paused for a moment, her fingers still resting on Frankie’s hands even though the two were now parked perfectly. “I might have left a note on your car in the Degrassi parking lot. I just can’t help it sometimes when people park like total jerks and jackasses. I just have to let it out sometimes before I can continue my day.”

“You know what? It was a pretty well-worded note. I think I have it floating around in the bottom of my backpack somewhere…” Frankie spoke in a teasing tone, but she was half-serious. Unless the sea of mediocrely graded homework and broken pens had somehow washed it out of existence, she was pretty sure that note was still in her possession somewhere. 

“A relic for another time. Maybe the day we address your backpack hoarding.” Esme’s tone was consistently pleasant, something Frankie had never experienced for this long of a time period before. Frankie knew there were definitely concrete reasons why she didn’t trust Esme in the past, but the girl was showing nothing but kindness recently. Who was Frankie to turn down kindness? 

“Let’s get you that pretzel before your evil side comes out.” Frankie joked as she pulled the keys out of the ignition. 

Frankie linked arms once again with Esme as they made their way from the parking garage to the mall. As soon as they entered the mall Esme pulled Frankie in the direction of the food court. 

“Pretzels!” Esme exclaimed, embodying the excitement of a four year old the moment she spotted the pretzel stand. Frankie giggled as she watched one of the smartest and most cunning individuals she had ever met lose her mind over a mall pretzel. Esme kept things entertaining to say the least. 

Frankie and Esme stood in line for a few minutes before receiving their order: two large pretzels with extra mustard. Frankie had never particularly cared for mustard in the past, but something about the way Esme had been talking it up since before they left Degrassi had tempted her to try it out. 

Once they received their order, Esme led Frankie to a small wobbly table in the food court and pulled out a chair with a smile. 

“First the car door the other day at the ravine, now pulling out my chair…” Frankie started joking. 

“I’m a gentleman, I know.” Esme boasted, then laughed. “Just sit down, little Hollingsworth. You’ve starved me.” 

Once both girls were settled in and set up with their pretzels, Esme began wolfing down her portion. 

“Munchies?” Frankie asked. She knew that Miles and Esme had done drugs in the past, and she had witnessed Miles high and munching on random snacks far too many times to count. Esme smoking up right before their hangout and having a major case of the munchies wasn’t completely out of the realm of possibility. 

Esme paused her chewing for a moment, seeming to contemplate before she spoke, which was something Esme Song seemed to do often. “I don’t eat much at home. Most of the time Zig cooks extra meals and brings ‘em to me, but...finals, and… I dunno,” Esme took another large bite of the pretzel. “My dad doesn’t exactly stimulate my appetite.”

“Do you want me to start bringing you extra food?” Frankie dared to ask. She didn’t want to seem like she was taking pity or offering handouts, but no matter what, Frankie thought, nobody should go hungry. “We always end up with leftovers because my mom either buys way too much and feels the need to prepare like, six casseroles at a time or hires a caterer and like, way overestimates what human beings are capable of eating. Sometimes it’s gross stuff, but most of the time it’s at least edible.” 

A smile crept onto Esme’s face, even though it was clear she was trying to act tough. “I guess you could bring me some edible food sometime. Does this package come with some of those divine breakfast croissants your family always weirdly has like, a boatload of, just chilling on their breakfast table every morning?”

“If you’re lucky you might reach the breakfast croissant tier. You’ve really gotta work for that one.” Frankie really enjoyed the silly banter she and Esme seemed to have developed. 

“That’s one of the things I miss most about hanging out with Miles. The food.” Esme said, seeming to reminisce as she dunked her pretzel in mustard. A devious smile crept onto Esme’s face before she spoke again. “I don’t think you wanna hear about the other thing I miss.” 

_ Of course _ Esme had to go there. “Do you not have a filter?” Frankie asked genuinely. 

“Do you not consider what I just did as filtering myself?” Esme responded. She sort of had a point. 

“You still reminded me that you hooked up with my brother, whether you said it explicitly or not.” Frankie set her pretzel down. Her appetite was getting ruined too many times by her brother’s sex life as of late. “Just saying… Not everyone wants to talk about sex all the time.” 

Esme reached over and broke off a piece of Frankie’s discarded pretzel, shrugging and snacking with a level of coolness that Frankie could never quite grasp. Esme was in no way intimidated or uncomfortable with confrontation. It almost felt like she invited complicated conversations at times. Usually, as soon as conversations got too complicated Frankie ran for the hills. The way Esme just casually confronted most things that came her way was compelling up close. 

“I feel like you’re just burned out from having to hide Miles and Lola’s secret.” 

Frankie scrambled a bit. “You mean the fact that they’re seeing each other? They’re technically dating now, and it’s not really a secret, they’re just keeping it quiet for now…” 

Esme raised her brow, signifying that she definitely knew more. Or had at least come to some sort of assumption. 

“What do you think you know?” Frankie asked with a twinge of nervousness pushing through in her tone. She wasn’t nearly as good at keeping her cool as Esme. 

“Lola is pregnant. Duh.” Esme let the words slip out so casually, as if she wasn’t dropping a huge bomb. 

Was there any point in trying to deny it? Esme had probably known for weeks. She seemed to somehow  _ always  _ know. “Why do you say that?” Frankie asked. She wanted to know where she had slipped up in keeping the secret to gauge how many other people could possibly already know. Lola was running out of time, but Frankie wanted Miles and Lola to be able to tell people on their own terms, in their own way. 

“Frankie… anyone with eyes could know. Luckily nobody at Degrassi seems to be able to focus on anything but their own petty drama.” Esme wasn’t elaborating fast enough. Seeming to be able to read that on Frankie’s face, Esme continued. “I noticed Miles diverting his attention to Lola earlier this semester. He started off super miserable and obsessed with Tristan, but over time, he chilled. You’re telling me you didn’t notice how much he changed since the beginning of the semester?” 

Frankie had noticed the behavior and attitude changes in her brother, but she had just attributed it to Miles focusing his energy and channeling his anxiety into writing the play. After a whole summer of witnessing her older brother fall into a pit of depression and hopelessness, she was just happy to see him doing better and writing again. She wasn’t on lookout for a curveball. “I don’t know if I was just so tied up in Jonah stuff or just…” 

“Willfully ignorant?” Esme offered a bit too quickly. 

“I was gonna go with blind. I guess that works too, though.” Frankie said. Some aspects of Esme’s brash persona would take some time to get used to. “I didn’t even realize how much Lola and Miles were hanging out. Were they really that obvious all along?” 

Esme reached across the table and put her hand on Frankie’s strawberry lemonade. “May I?” She asked permission for a sip, and Frankie agreed. After taking a large sip from Frankie’s straw, Esme spoke again. “Like I said, I noticed them hanging out a bunch. Then the play was conceived.” Esme paused and smiled. “Not the only thing conceived, but that was a little later on.” 

“Cheap shot.” Frankie grabbed her drink back from Esme and took a sip, then stuck out her tongue playfully. “Alright, recount the story without constantly reminding me of my niece or nephew’s conception.” 

Esme started listing off bits of evidence that seemed obvious in retrospect. “Miles suddenly had a crusade of hope, started writing the play and stopped mentioning his depressing boyfriend situation every two minutes in class… Miles started working at the cantina despite absolutely sucking at food service and spent half of the time following Lola around or watching her from across the restaurant…” 

“But when did you know that they were together?” Frankie asked. This was the moment she was really curious about.

“One day, I was on my way to math class and I saw Miles,” Esme stated. “He was staring across the hallway right at Lola. He wasn’t exactly being subtle about it. Just the  _ way  _ he was looking at her… you don’t look at someone like that unless you love them.”

Frankie never felt like she had looked at Jonah or even Winston in the way Esme was describing. She liked them, sure, but she never  _ longed.  _ She always felt like she was chasing her crushes and obsessing, but it wasn’t the same as how Esme was describing Lola and Miles. Or what she’d seen firsthand with Lola and Miles. Witnessing the relationship problems between her parents, knowing about her father’s infidelities and seeing how her mother had fallen apart afterward had undoubtedly messed with her view of love. Had it made her completely  _ unable  _ to love, though? 

“That’s how Zig looks at you.” Frankie tried to shake off the intense thoughts she was having and focus on learning more about Esme. “He follows you around like you speak the gospel or something.” 

Esme sighed. “I dunno. He likes me when I’m up.” 

“What do you mean?” Frankie questioned. 

“When I’m up. You know, dancing around the hallways, telling him how awesome his biceps are, watching him play video games, hooking up in the parking lot…” 

Frankie attempted to conceal her recoiling as she recalled the parking lot incident. She still just thought public sex, especially at school where the odds of getting caught and facing consequences were high, was too risky and sort of tacky. “And when you’re not in a good mood?” She pushed Esme to continue opening up. 

“I just feel like we can never get _ deep.  _ Whenever I open up to him, it scares him away. He tries to be there, but he just doesn’t know how to handle it. I hate feeling like I’m hiding parts of myself from him, but I feel like whenever I try to reveal myself…” Esme tapered off, realizing how much she had opened up. She paused, looking down at the table before looking up and making eye contact with Frankie.

“Pretending bad things aren’t happening and aren't affecting you makes you a whole lot easier to be around, but it eats at you.” Frankie spoke, still holding Esme’s gaze. Esme was vocalizing so many of the feelings that Frankie had been feeling for the past couple of years. Like she couldn’t open up to people, like she had to be a certain  _ happy  _ version of herself in order to get acceptance from the people around her. All because more complicated, darker feelings made people uncomfortable. 

This was something that Frankie was discovering everyone went through, but for some reason breaking those barriers and being able to fully be yourself in front of someone else seemed like such an impossible task at times. Until you found the right person. 

“Yeah, and sometimes I feel like I’ve been gnawed up by a pack of wolves… do you?” Esme’s head tilted slightly as she posed the question to Frankie. She really just seemed like she wanted to relate with Frankie. Other than Zig and previously Miles, Frankie didn’t really know who else Esme was friends with. 

“Something like that.” Frankie responded. She wasn’t sure if that was the way she’d immediately describe it, but there were definitely times when she felt chewed up and spit out by the world. 

“I just wish I could talk to Zig about stuff like this.” Esme signed, causing Frankie to suddenly remember where her thought train was going before it derailed. 

“So you guys aren’t the perfect couple?” Frankie allowed herself to ask. She already knew that Esme and Zig weren’t, she had seen them fight and heard their secondhand drama from Tiny, who could never shut up about how much he disliked Esme. Hearing the truth about their relationship from Esme’s mouth gave Frankie a different perspective, though. 

Esme shook her head. “I’ll tell you more if this never leaves this table, okay?” She began leaning in, ready to spill some secrets. 

“As long as you don’t tell anyone about Lola and Miles.” Frankie reminded Esme. Knowing that an outside person officially knew about Lola’s situation made Frankie  _ nervous.  _ This was really becoming real. 

“I like you, Frankie. I’m not gonna betray your trust like that.” Esme spoke sweetly. 

Frankie thought back to some of the chaos that Esme had caused in the past. It wasn’t completely outside of the realm of possibility for Esme to flip a switch or cause some drama, but based on recent behavior, it seemed sort of unlikely to Frankie. In this instance, Esme seemed to have good intentions. Maybe she just wanted a friend all along and completely sucked at showing it. 

“I like you too, Esme.” Frankie said, not quite sure what it fully meant. Her feelings toward Esme were  _ complicated.  _ She felt like she was being drawn in by a beautiful siren who had the capability to collapse her life. She had seen what being involved with Esme brought Miles. Maybe learning more about the inner workings of Esme’s supposedly failing relationship with Zig would help clear some things up. “Let’s trust each other.” She reached out a pinky, signifying a promise made between the two girls. 

Esme happily accepted, curling her pinky around Frankie’s. “Where do I begin…” she sighed, then began pouring her heart out about every problem, indiscretion and parking ticket that Zig had ever had. Frankie sipped her lemonade and listened.  _ This is going to be a long and interesting ride _ , Frankie thought, allowing a smile on her face as she intently listened to Esme vent. 


	14. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola and Frankie discuss and prepare for a night nobody will ever forget.

Lola stood in the Cantina kitchen and let out an exhausted sigh, winded from the back-to-back orders she’d just taken. She’d been hoping to get off early and maybe see Miles, but they were crazy packed today. Her uniform was starting to feel super tight, so she made sure to keep her apron on at all times. She was really beginning to appreciate that ugly apron. 

Being over three months pregnant now, Lola was in full paranoia mode. She didn’t think any of her co-workers had caught on yet, or at least desperately hoped they hadn’t. But any time she overheard whispers or laughter in the kitchen, she automatically panicked. A little gossip was a Cantina staple, and it was largely harmless — ordinarily, Lola loved overhearing juicy comments about waiters’ secret hook ups, regular customers’ questionable new haircuts, the feuds her co-workers were having with their mother-in-laws. Now, she freaked out at the mere sight of her co-workers laughing and talking closely. Like two of the 40-something-year-old waitresses, Belinda and Lucia, were doing now. 

“Hey!” Lola chriped, knowing she was coming off a little too enthusiastic. “What’s so funny?”

“Oh, just this cat video my niece sent me on FaceRange,” Lucia said, and Lola instantly felt stupid for having been so worried. “Here, have a look! Belinda here nearly _died_ of laughter.”

Lola faked a laugh at the video, which she’d already seen about a million times when it first went viral around two months ago. “Super adorbs,” she smiled, relieved. “Well, I should get back to-”

But Belinda grabbed her shoulder. Normally Lola didn’t mind that type of thing, but lately her co-workers having no concept of personal space was really starting to get on her nerves. “Wait a second, Mija,” she said, “we’ve been wondering something.”

Lola froze, her heart suddenly pounding like crazy. Maybe this apron hadn’t been concealing her secret as well as she’d thought. The thought of her co-workers, some of whom she’d known since grade school, knowing she had one in the oven was already intimidating as hell, but the thought of them figuring it out before she’d even gotten a chance to tell her dad was absolutely terrifying. 

But then Lucia cut in. “What shampoo do you use? Your hair looks absolutely _radiant_ lately.” 

Lola wanted to let out a giant sigh of relief. “Umm, it’s a special brand from my hairdresser. You know, to preserve the color. I can’t remember the name off the top of my head, but-”

“Well, whatever you’re using, I simply _must_ know,” Belinda said, taking it upon herself to twirl one of Lola’s loose ends. “I haven’t been able to get roots that shiny since I was pregnant with my daughter years ago.”

Lola’s face dropped, all of the relief she’d felt seconds ago totally dissipated. She hadn’t even considered that there would be noticeable physical changes besides her weight. 

Once her co-workers were gone, Lola discreetly pulled up the pregnancy tracker app she’d downloaded on her phone a few weeks ago. Yup, there it was: second trimester— shinier hair, bigger boobs, more defined curves. All of these were supposed to be considered “perks,” but they certainly didn’t feel that way to Lola. They were just another reminder that her body was changing to accommodate this growing baby.

This settled it. She needed to call Miles after work and make a plan to tell their parents already, for real this time.

…..

“You’re quiet tonight.”

Lola glanced over at her father from the passenger seat on their way home from work. She was super tired, and honestly mostly just thinking about the Taco Bell she was going to order when she got home. That, and how in the hell she and Miles were going to pull this off. There wasn’t time anymore. They had to come clean. “Hmm? Oh, just tired from work.”

“Mmm. Tell me about it.” Her dad played around with the radio for a second, finally settling on some Spanish pop station. He had a weird, playful look on his face, and it made Lola uneasy. Like the kind of smile he used to give her when he dragged her to the dentist but promised they’d get ice cream after. “So, when do I get to meet this new boy of yours? Obviously he won’t be good enough for my princesa, but I at least need to make sure he knows his tamales from his enchiladas.”

Lola sat up straight. “How did…?”

“I always know these things, Mija. Believe me, you teenagers aren’t as good at keeping secrets as you think.”

_Wanna bet?_ Lola thought, resting her hand on her slightly round stomach. Okay, so the cat was out of the bag about her having a boyfriend, but at least her father didn’t seem to suspect anything more. Right? “Well, uh, you’ve actually already met him,” Lola said, figuring it was worth it to rip off the tiny band-aid if it meant she could keep the bigger one on a little longer. “Miles. You know, Frankie’s brother? He did some shifts at the Cantina a while ago. He definitely knows his tamales from his enchiladas. He was a super good waiter — he even picked up some Spanish.” Lola knew she was rambling, but she still went on. It felt kind of good to brag about her boy a little. Heck, maybe her father would even take the baby bombshell easier if he liked Miles. Wishful thinking probably, but… “And he can kinda cook! He makes these really good quesadillas… and he’s an _amazing_ writer, we wrote that whole play together-”

“Miles, hmm?” Lola couldn’t read her dad’s expression. “Is he staying out of trouble these days?”

“Uh-huh!” Lola spoke quickly. “Yeah, totally. Um, in fact, he and his mom invited us over for dinner next weekend.” _Why was she still talking? There was no dinner invite. What on earth was she saying?_ “I think it’d be fun! You’ll like him, I promise. He’s… he’s grown up a lot. And did I mention he was a _really_ good waiter?”

Lola’s father just smiled. “Well, I’d do anything for you, Mija,” he said as they pulled into the driveway. He sighed under his breath. “You know that, don’t you?” 

“Yeah,” Lola gulped, hoping that sentiment would still be true in a week. “Um, I’ll meet you inside in a few minutes, okay? Love you, Dad.” 

She waited for her father to get out of the car, then pulled out her cell and dialed Miles’ number. How in the world were they going to pull this off?

...

Frankie pulled up to Lola’s house early Sunday evening to pick her up, preparing herself for what was sure to be the most memorable dinner of their high school lives.

Never in a million years had she imagined she’d be sitting across from her older brother and best friend as they dropped a baby bombshell on their parents. Frankie was of course worried for Lola and Miles, and anxious as hell about how this news was inevitably going to mess up the already very messy Hollingsworth family dynamic. But she had to admit she was also pretty grateful that it wasn’t her turn to be the problem child tonight for once. After all the years their mother had spent lecturing Frankie on not getting pregnant, had she once considered talking to her _sons_ about being safe and smart about sex? Not that Frankie thought Hunter would be getting any action anytime soon.

Lola hopped into the passenger seat, already looking crazy nervous. She was wearing a floral dress and had a bouquet of red roses in her lap to match. “Do you think your mom will like these?” Lola rambled. “I know Miles said tulips are her favorite, but the market was all sold out, and-”

“Lo, relax. Breathe,” Frankie tried to assure her. “My mom already loves you, remember?” 

“Yeah, for _now_ ,” Lola huffed, setting the bouquet on the floor. Frankie could tell she was in total stress mode. “Something tells me she won’t be feeling that way by dessert.”

Truthfully, with that dress Lola had chosen, her mother might figure it out before they’d even finished their appetizers. Lola was doing her best to conceal her growing bump, but there was no denying that she was looking more pregnant these days. It still weirded Frankie out a little, if she was honest. But she trusted Lola to know what she was doing, and- she couldn’t believe she was saying it, but- she trusted her older brother did too. 

“So what’s the game plan?” Frankie asked.

“My dad will come straight to your place right after work,” Lola said, like it was a play rehearsal. “Miles and I will play it cool for a bit. You know, talk about all the work we’ve been doing on _I.M. Hope_ , Miles’ shifts at the Cantina, how adorable we look together....”

Frankie was grateful Miles had opted not to invite their father over for this occasion. Sure, Mr. Hollingsworth would have to hear about the baby eventually, but Frankie couldn’t imagine the added stress his presence would bring on top of all this. It was also probably a good thing that Hunter, who was still out of the loop with this whole thing as far as Frankie knew, was sleeping over at Baaz’s. The less Hollingsworths around tonight, the better. “And then…?”

“And then…” Lola continued, her voice growing more anxious as she spoke. “We’ll tell them that we have some, uh… news.”

Frankie couldn’t help but make a face. “ _News_? You sound like Simpson at an assembly.”

“Well, what would _you_ call it?!” Lola snapped. She took a second to breathe, then backtracked, “Sorry. Hormones are kind of a bitch.” 

Frankie and Lola both gave in and laughed for a second. Frankie could already hear her mom, _There’s nothing funny about this situation!_ But this whole thing almost _was_ funny, in a messed up way. It was just so absurd, so… _Degrassi._

_“_ Anyways,” Lola collected herself, “Miles and I will tell them we’ve already been to the doctor, that we’re really serious about this. That we know what we’re getting into and how… how we’re going to do _everything_ we can to be good parents. And that we’re both still going to finish school and go to uni and...” She sighed and gave a half-hearted shrug. Frankie couldn’t tell if Lola was trying to convince her she knew what she was doing, or convince herself. “If that doesn’t work… well, there’s always crying, right? I wore waterproof mascara for a reason.”

Frankie could already imagine the million questions her mother would have. How was Lola going to handle school pregnant, much less with a screaming infant to take care of? What would they do for day-care? How would they pay for baby clothes and diapers and whatever the hell else babies needed? Had either Lola or Miles ever even _held_ a baby before? Frankie knew her best friend and brother had endless grilling and lectures ahead of them. Even though she’d never been in _this_ type of situation, she knew all too well what it was like to seriously mess up and have to own it. Instead of pushing Lola for further details, she just reached over and squeezed her hand. Lola leaned against Frankie’s shoulder and sighed, basking in that comfort. They both knew they had a long night- and a very long road- ahead of them. It was a comfort to know that through all this, Lola was still Lola, Frankie was still Frankie, and they were still them. 

It was strange...when Frankie first found out about Lola and Miles, both girls were convinced their friendship would never recover. But after they got over the drama and awkwardness of it all, this pregnancy had actually made Frankie and Lola closer in a way. Frankie seeing her niece or nephew on that screen a few weeks ago had been enough to snap her out of whatever grudge she was holding and focus on what really mattered.

Honestly, Frankie had always felt a little threatened by the idea of Lola getting close to Miles. Maybe because deep down, she was afraid of becoming a second choice, afraid Lola would end up being just like all the girls who had used Frankie to get with Miles in the past, those “friends” who left her in the dust once they found out she had a way cooler brother they could flirt with. But Frankie saw now that it wasn’t like that with Lola and Miles, at all. She could tell they really cared about each other in a way that most couples just didn’t, especially ones their age. Frankie would never admit this to either of them, but seeing the two of them together kind of gave her some hope that maybe love wasn’t a total bust. Maybe there was more out there than guys who called her immature behind her back and made her feel crazy all the time. Who would have thought there was more to life than- as Lola had so lovingly put it- “the guy whose hairstyle is _needs a bath_ ”?

Right now, all Frankie really cared about was making sure Lola, Miles, and the baby were okay. It was crazy how much her priorities had shifted over the past few weeks, how much she’d… wait, was this growing up? 

She supposed she had one person in particular to really thank for this sudden dose of perspective. “Hey, Lo… what do you think of Esme?”

Lola cocked her head with confusion. “Uh… she’s not exactly my bestie.” 

“But she’s not the _worst._ ” Frankie weakly defended her newfound friend. Now she sort of felt like she wanted to feel out how Lola felt before spilling about her escapades with Esme. Not that she needed Lola’s approval, but… maybe she did? Lola _was_ important to Frankie. What she thought mattered. 

“Have you guys been hanging out?” Lola asked casually. 

“A little bit.” Frankie admitted. “She’s actually pretty down to earth and cool sometimes. We get along more than I was expecting.” 

Lola didn’t seem shocked or upset. “Jonah actually told me at play practice that he noticed you two seemed to be getting close. He seemed jealous.”

Frankie raised her brows. She was shocked that Jonah had been keeping an eye on her, and even more shocked that Jonah had gone out of her way to ask Lola about Frankie.

“I told him I didn’t know anything. Because I didn’t, til now.” Lola shrugged. “So… you like Esme now?” 

“No!” Frankie said instinctively. “I mean… I like her. I don’t _like_ her like her. But I don’t not like her. Like…” She knew she sounded like an idiot, but Lola’s question had caught her off guard. _Did_ she like Esme? Frankie had never really questioned her sexuality or given much thought to the idea that she might not be straight. She knew she liked guys, that was a given. But Esme… there was something different about the way she thought of her, the way Frankie’s heart raced when they crossed paths in the hallway, the way she had been so excited to share pretzels with her at the mall. “I… I don’t know,” Frankie admitted.

“Hey, it’s chill- you don’t have to have everything figured out,” Lola said gently. She squeezed Frankie’s shoulder to assure her, always the mom friend. Well, _literally_ the mom friend now. “Whatever makes you happy, you know?”

Frankie nodded, absorbing her best friend’s words. “Are _you_ happy, Lo?” she asked as they pulled up to the Hollingsworth house. “I mean, all things considered.” _Baby considered._

Lola didn’t hesitate. “Yeah, I am,” she said. She looked down at her lap and sighed. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, everything about this situation is totally nuts. But your brother makes me really happy. I feel like… I feel like I’ve found my person.”

_Her person..._ Frankie couldn’t help but wonder when she’d find hers too. Or if, maybe, she already had. 


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Miles helps Lola calm down before an eventful family dinner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is slightly more suggestive than usual, but we don't go into any detail.

When Lola walked into the Hollingsworth house that night, it felt…  _ different _ . For years, this had just been a place to kick back with Frankie, gossip by the pool, and have sleepovers. It had always been kind of like her second home. But tonight, it felt cold and uninviting. Lola felt less like she was getting ready to have dinner with her boyfriend’s family, and more like she was suiting up for battle.

“Hey,” Miles greeted her with a peck on the cheek. He looked handsome: blue button-down shirt, slacks, nice shoes, hair combed back. He looked exactly the way you would want your boyfriend to look for dinner with your dad, or least, under normal circumstances. But he also looked sexy as hell, Lola thought to herself.

“ _G_ _ ak!”  _ Frankie said all dramatically. She put the bouquet of roses Lola brought on the table. “No PDA in front of me, remember?”

“Fine,” Miles said, but then smirked and added, “We’ll just go do it upstairs then. Mind if we use your room?”

Before Frankie could object, Lola snapped, “Will you two knock it off? I’m already crazy stressed enough without your little bicker fest.” Miles gave her those big puppy dog eyes of his, and she unclenched a little. Normally she found these little Hollingsworth spats amusing, but tonight it just felt annoying. She glanced around the house, still tense. “Where’s your mom?”

“She’s getting dinner ready outside,” Miles said. He paused. “Well. The chef made dinner. And our housekeeper got the table ready. But Mom still has to make it look like she’s fussing over  _ something _ .”

Lola couldn’t shake these nerves. She didn’t know how Miles was so calm right now. Or even Frankie, for that matter. She needed to do something to get rid of these jitters so she could think straight. Not that she could ever  _ really _ think straight around Miles. Even in Lola’s stressed out state, she still couldn’t ignore how  _ good  _ her boyfriend looked right now. Suddenly she was no longer just a ball of stress, but a mess of stress  _ and _ hormones. Really crazy ones. “Actually…  _ can _ we go upstairs for a minute, babe?” she said to Miles. Huh. That felt weird, calling him babe. Were they one of those pet name couples? Lola couldn’t tell yet. She turned to Frankie and clarified, “ _ Just  _ to talk. No other reason.” That was a complete lie, but what else was she supposed to say to her bestie?

“Sure…  _ talking _ …” Frankie mumbled, but took the hint and left the two of them to themselves. 

Lola and Miles went upstairs to his room, closing the door behind them. “You know I was just kidding around with Frankie, right?” Miles said.

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” Lola said quickly. She couldn’t stop pacing around. This was a really inconvenient time to be this turned on. She had no idea how all these hormones worked exactly, but it was driving her nuts. “How are you so  _ calm  _ right now?” she asked Miles, dumbfounded. Sure, he wasn’t the one pregnant, but he was still going to have to answer to Lola’s dad and his mom. 

“Uh, practice, I guess?” Miles shrugged. “Not with getting girls pregnant,” he quickly clarified, letting out a nervous laugh. “Just. You know. I’m kind of already used to being the family disappointment. If my dad was here, it’d be another story, but my mom… I can handle her.” He pulled Lola into a tight hug and added, “We’re going to be okay. No matter what happens, I’m not leaving you or our baby, okay? I promise.”

Lola leaned into his chest and sighed, still overwhelmed and crazy nervous, but also just feeling really grateful to have Miles by her side through this. “Hey… you know how I said it was too weird to hook up with you while Frankie’s home?” 

Miles raised his eyebrow. “Yeah...?”

“Forget about that.”

Miles laughed as his hands slowly migrated from rubbing Lola’s shoulders to the middle of her back. “I  _ thought _ I was getting those vibes from you.” 

“Yeah, yeah… I’m not subtle.” Lola reached up and wrapped her arms around her boyfriend’s neck. She pushed up on her tiptoes so that she could reach and mess up the back of Miles’ hair. “I know we don’t have that much time, but… being in your bedroom again like this alone…” Lola’s words got softer as her lips got closer to his lips. “Kinda reminds me of our first kiss.” 

Miles touched the tip of his nose to Lola’s. They were so, so close to kissing. Resisting Miles was literally impossible at this point. Since the first time she laid her lips on Miles, Lola hadn’t been able to get the way he made her feel out of her head. And now, as he held her closely in the same room they consummated their relationship and made a baby, albeit accidentally, her entire body was electrified by those intense feelings. Instead of hesitating for another moment, Lola planted a kiss on Miles’ lips. Miles moved his hand slowly from the middle of Lola’s back toward her growing bump. Lola paused, stepping back self-consciously. 

“The baby is getting so big already.” Her voice ventured into a slight whine as she placed her hand where Miles had a moment earlier. “I feel like your mom is gonna call us out the moment I come downstairs in this dress.” 

“Your dress looks great.” Miles reached and placed his hand on top of Lola’s. “You don’t look a day past six weeks pregnant.” He threw out a lighthearted joke, causing Lola to poke him with her elbow. Miles laughed and grabbed Lola’s elbow, pulling it up to his face and placing a gentle kiss on it. 

Lola smiled, but she was still self conscious. She didn’t want to look pregnant  _ at all.  _ She knew that wasn’t an option, and Miles saying she looked six weeks pregnant was generous considering she had recently entered her second trimester. Lola stepped away from Miles and in front of the mirror that rested against his wall. She turned to the side and examined the slight bump under her dress. 

Miles stepped behind her, appearing in the mirror and placing his head on top of her head. “It’s really not noticeable unless you’re looking for it. And when you notice it… it’s cute. Beautiful.” Miles pulled Lola closer. “Sexy, even…”

Lola turned around and looked up at him. “Are you gonna think I’m sexy when I look like I’m smuggling a beach ball under my shirt?” 

“I’m gonna take that shirt off and kiss that beach ball all over.” Miles touched her stomach again. This time she didn’t resist or step back. “And then I’m gonna kiss you everywhere else.” He kissed her neck, then her jaw. “Everywhere.” He whispered in her ear, causing chills to go down Lola’s spine. 

Suddenly, the anxiety and panic over whatever was going to happen at dinner disappeared. All Lola could focus on was how Miles was making her feel. He was intoxicating on a level she had never felt or even imagined. She reached into her pocket and checked the time. “We have thirty minutes before my dad gets off work. Then it’ll probably take him about twenty five minutes to get here…” Lola was cut off by a kiss on the lips. 

“We have time.” Miles said between kisses. “I’ll make sure you’re in tip-top shape before we go downstairs. Everything is going to go perfectly. Now relax,” He paused, reaching to unzip Lola’s dress, helping her out of it. “And let me make sure my door is locked.” 

Miles walked over to the door and turned the lock, causing it to  _ click.  _ He stepped toward Lola again, his hand reaching up to caress her cheek. “I can’t wait to keep doing this. Over and over.” Lola couldn’t resist leaning in and kissing him again. And again, and again… 

…

Lola and Miles had been lost in a post-sex glow for much longer than originally intended. So many things with Miles were  _ different _ now. Not that the first time hadn’t been magical, but this time especially was unlike anything she had ever felt before. She wasn’t sure if it was the pregnancy hormones or their recent relationship status confirmation, but everything just felt so natural between them now. What felt natural happened to also feel ridiculously good. 

“Are you sure I took your virginity? Because you do not…” Miles paused, recounting parts of their encounter with a goofy smile on his face. “You don’t do any of that like a virgin.” 

Lola blushed, shoving one of Miles’ pillows in his face. “Hush. You know I was so nervous the first time. You just make me feel comfy.” 

Miles reached his long, lanky arm around Lola’s body, smoothing out the back of her hair. “I noticed. I love it. And…” Miles paused, almost seeming like he was about to tell Lola he loved her. “I love all of this. The relationship we’re building… the family we’re making…” 

“The family we’re about to disappoint…” Lola’s mind couldn’t help but wander back to the stressful situation at hand. Hooking up was a good distraction, but the rush she got from it was wearing off a bit as she laid in Miles’ bed for longer than originally intended. 

“We have plenty of time to be stressed about that. Just… be with me here for a minute.” Miles pulled Lola tight to his chest. “And then we’ll get dressed and we can practice telling them one more time before we go downstairs.” 

Miles and Lola had been practicing what they were going to say together for days. Luckily being a part of the school play had taught both of them how to memorize certain lines. 

Lola sighed dramatically, allowing her body to fully relax in Miles’ arms once again. She hadn’t realized just how tense her muscles had gotten just thinking about the night they had ahead. The stress was nearly impossible to escape. After this, her life was forever different. Lola pushed the thoughts out of her head for the time being. Right now, she just needed to enjoy Miles. 

Lola’s phone buzzed on Miles’ bedside table, taking both teenagers out of the moment. It was her father calling. She showed the screen to Miles, then answered it with slightly shaky hands. 

“Hello?” Lola answered, pulling away from Miles. It just felt weird to talk to her father while she was in bed with a boy, even if her father was about to find out that she had  _ definitely  _ already been in bed with that boy. Hence… pregnancy. 

“I’m on my way to your boyfriend’s house, Mija. Sorry for the wait, some customers ran out on a huge bill right before closing and Belinda was really upset about it. Had to deal with security camera stuff, then consoling her because she thought it was her fault…” 

Lola pulled her phone away from her face and checked the time. She had spent  _ way _ longer in bed with Miles than intended. If her father hadn’t gotten caught up at the cantina, he would be about five minutes from arriving. They needed to get downstairs pronto. “How far are you now?” Lola asked as she climbed out of bed and searched the floor for her dress. 

“About fifteen minutes, but don’t worry, I’m rushing.” Her father responded. 

“No need to rush, we’re just...hanging out.” Lola tossed Miles’ now-wrinkled shirt, then his pants, toward him. “I’ll see you soon, Dad.” She let nervousness bleed into her tone a little bit. Hopefully, Lola thought, that didn’t translate over the phone. Before her father could speak again, Lola hung up and tossed her phone onto the bed. 

“Don’t panic.” Miles said preemptively. He could already sense the flood of stress and emotions overcoming Lola. The sex had been a great distraction and hormonal rush, but now she felt like every bit of preparation she had done was completely unraveled. 

Miles helped Lola into her slightly tight dress and assisted with the zipper, placing a kiss on the base of her neck before he stepped away to dress himself. The spot where his lips met her skin felt tingly even after he walked away. Her entire torso, chest and stomach felt like bees and butterflies were at war with one another, but in a good way. In a way she never wanted to stop. Even if everything was a complete disaster after tonight, Lola thought, at least she found someone who made her feel like this. 

Lola checked herself out in the mirror, turning and observing herself at every angle to make sure there was nothing immediately clockable about her appearance. For all anyone else in the house needed to know, Miles and Lola had only been talking, nothing more. 

“Let’s go downstairs before my mom or Frankie comes up to try and find us.” Miles swooped in and wrapped his arm around Lola, ushering her toward the door. 

Frankie knew that Lola and her brother had disappeared upstairs with less than pure thoughts and intentions, but the extended absence really just confirmed everything that she didn’t want to imagine or walk in on. She was glad that Lola and Miles were happy and that her little nephew or niece had parents that loved one another, but something about being under the same roof while her brother and best friend were hooking up just made Frankie feel uneasy. 

“Frankie! Are you ready for dinner?” Frankie’s mother entered the kitchen holding the roses that Lola had brought, now placed in a crystal vase. “Come on outside and check out how I have the table set up. I want your opinion before Lola’s father gets here.” 

“Mr. Pacini has been here a dozen times. He’s not some political ally or something that you need to impress.” Frankie followed her mother toward their outdoor dining area. 

“Those are  _ associates _ , not allies.” Frankie’s mother corrected. 

“What’s the difference?” Frankie asked. They approached the table and Frankie observed what her mother had put together. It was way fancier than it needed to be. White tablecloth, three different types of flowers on the table, tons of candles… it was pretty, but  _ overboard _ . Especially considering her mother didn’t yet know just how much of an event this night was going to be. For all Diana Hollingsworth knew at this moment, this dinner was just meant to celebrate Miles and Lola’s new relationship and get to know Lola’s dad a little more. Maybe her mother felt like she had to overcompensate because she wasn’t used to handling things without her husband, Frankie thought. Her mother knew how to throw an event or fancy dinner, but she didn’t usually throw any soirées solo.

As Frankie’s mother picked up a folded napkin, unfolded it and began refolding it, she reluctantly explained. “An ally is someone who you build a mutually beneficial relationship with. An associate is someone you have a business relationship with, that you need to maintain in order to ensure that business runs smoothly.” Her mother seemed to easily distinguish that most of the people her husband was involved with were simply  _ associates _ , nothing more. 

Frankie wondered if that was a reflection of the type of person her father was. Someone who, outside of necessary business interactions, nobody really wanted to be around. He wasn’t invited to this dinner, after all. It was hard not to let her complicated relationship with her father taint everything in her life. He didn’t live with them anymore, but that didn’t mean he didn’t constantly come up in her mind. 

“But why are you going so overboard for Mr. Pacini?” Frankie got back to the main point. 

“He’s your brother’s girlfriend’s father. I want to be involved in your brother’s life before it’s too late.”  _ Too late for what?  _ Frankie thought. Miles was leaving for college, but that was like a year away. Assuming he was still even  _ going _ to college now that he was about to become a whole dad. “Plus, I just want to show your brother I care.” Her mother answered, and as if he was summoned, Miles appeared. 

“You’re sweet, mom.” Miles approached, looking happy as ever. “I care about you too.” He examined the overly decorated table that his mother had set up and his smile slowly turned to a grimace. “Mom, can I help you make this look a little less like Thanksgiving Dinner? And Frankie… Lola’s in the kitchen, wanna help her out before her dad gets here?” 

Frankie was okay with getting excused, though she had to admit as the clock was running out she was getting more and more anxious. She could only imagine how much Lola was freaking out. She walked briskly toward the kitchen. “Lo?” She called out. 

She turned the corner into the kitchen and found her blue-haired person of interest standing in the kitchen with a finger dipped into the iced top of a cupcake. 

“Your mom made cupcakes. With blue icing.” Lola spoke, the insides of her lips now tinted slightly blue. “I saw them, and I just… could not resist. It must be a craving or something, because I cannot stop eating. The icing has _coconut_ _flakes,_ Franks _._ ” 

Frankie couldn’t help but giggle a bit. “You’re gonna give your secret away if you walk up with blue teeth before dinner.” She reached around and smoothed out the back of Lola’s hair, which was definitely a little messed up from  _ activities  _ with Miles. “You might wanna make sure you don’t have bed head either.” 

“Fix me?” Lola asked. 

“Always.” Frankie responded, taking Lola’s hand and leading her to the bathroom nearest to the kitchen. “Finish the cupcake first.” Frankie gestured to the half-eaten cupcake that Lola was still happily munching on. 

Lola quickly shoved the rest of the cupcake in her mouth and chewed furiously, still clearly enjoying every last bite. “Your mom knows how to bake.” She spoke with a mostly full mouth. 

“Maybe wait until next time you taste the dessert to compliment her on that.” Frankie joked.

While Lola finished eating, Frankie helped fix her hair and dress, both of which were definitely a bit askew despite Lola’s best efforts to fix herself up. Her eyes fixated on Lola’s growing stomach for longer than intended. It was really starting to become apparent, no matter what Lola wore or how she stood, that there was a growing baby in there. A baby that was getting bigger and bigger every day. Tonight was just the beginning of this journey becoming more than just Lola’s not so little secret. 

The doorbell rang, interrupting Frankie’s thoughts. “That would be your dad.” She said while handing Lola a bottle of mouthwash to help wash out the blue icing that had partially stained her teeth. “Want me to go answer that?” 

Lola nodded, clearly not feeling ready or fully secure about what was about to unfold. This was a scary but important step, Frankie thought. She was glad she could be there for her best friend for a moment that she would otherwise likely have to deal with on her own. There were  _ some _ perks to her brother knocking up her best friend rather than some random scumbag. 


	16. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola and Miles open up about their situation to their parents.

Lola wandered out to the hallway, the taste of blue frosting still lingering on her lips. She passed by a photo of Miles on her way over, one of his senior portraits. It must have been taken at the beginning of the semester. He was smiling in the picture, but his eyes looked so glum, almost grey. The way they’d looked when they collided in the school hallway that fateful afternoon. Now, when Lola looked up and saw her boyfriend, all she could notice was how bright his eyes were. They matched his bright smile perfectly- just like the way his shirt perfectly matched her hair. Sometimes Lola felt like the two of them were each other’s missing puzzle pieces, the way they unexpectedly completed each other so well, the way they just _worked_ in a way that didn’t always make sense to anyone else. Lola hoped their baby would get the best pieces of both of them.

“Hey,” Miles said quietly, still smiling, but obviously just as nervous. He held his hand out for her to hold. “Ready for this?”

“Not at all,” Lola said, honest. She grabbed his hand and squeezed it. “But at least we get to eat.”

“Miles! Good to see you, Mijo.”

“You too, Mr. Pacini.” Miles shook her father’s hand, clearly more nervous now. Lola’s dad always had such a warm, friendly demeanor to him— it was hard to imagine anyone being intimidated by this 5’7 man who always had a smile on his face, hummed while he worked, and waved to every little kid who came through the Cantina. But he was also protective as hell of Lola and not afraid to be crazy strict when he needed to be. He’d grounded her for two months after the Degrassi Nudes scandal back in Grade 9. What was he going to do now, ground her until she was 30?

Mrs. Hollingsworth scurried into the living room, looking rushed as always, even though there was no real hurry and all she’d really done was decorate a table. “What are we all waiting for? Dinner is on the table outside! I hope everyone likes mushroom chicken...”

Lola, Frankie, and Miles all exchanged a nervous glance as they followed the parents outside. Lola felt her chest tighten with stress again. It didn’t help that she hated mushrooms.

At least, Lola _thought_ she hated them. But as soon as they sat down at the table, she wanted to devour everything in sight. She grabbed a roll from the bread basket and dug right into the pure fluffy bliss. It was so good that she almost didn’t notice when Frankie kicked her under the table. “Slow down!” Frankie hissed quietly. She was sitting to Lola’s right, Miles to her left. “You’re gonna give yourself away before your dad even makes his plate.”

“I’m _hungry_ ,” Lola snapped, trying to keep to a whisper. 

Miles’ mother cleared her throat. “Well, thank you for coming tonight.” She smiled warmly at her and Miles, and her approval seemed genuine. It almost made Lola sad— she knew that after this dinner, Miles’ mom was probably never going to look at her like that again. “I have to say, Lola, I’m glad you two are seeing each other. Ever since you started working on that play together, Miles has been so much happier and more grounded…” _Grounded. Ironic_ , Lola thought. “...and I think you’re a wonderful influence on him.”

Miles squeezed Lola’s hand and smiled. For a minute, it almost felt like they were just having a normal family dinner. “I couldn’t agree more.”

Mr. Pacini beamed. “Well, I only hope you’re just as good of an influence on my daughter,” he chuckled to Miles. Lola nervously traced her hand across her stomach, feeling that stress again. She didn’t even have to look at Miles to know he felt it too. 

“So, let’s have a toast,” her father continued. He raised his glass of wine and nodded at Mrs. Hollingsworth. “To our kids, and to their future.”

Lola glanced over to Miles and smiled nervously, raising her glass. She just wanted to bask in the celebration and compliments for a few minutes more, then she’d break the news. Miles raised his glass as well, seeming to understand what Lola was trying to tell him through her glance.

Everyone at the table stood up for a moment and joined their glasses, causing several tiny _clinks._

As everyone settled into their seats again, Lola snuck in a few more bites of dinner. She noticed Mrs. Hollingsworth’s eyes on her and felt a wave of self- consciousness hit her. Lola was doing everything she could not to blow everything up before everyone got a good taste of their entrees, but nerves and paranoia felt like they were bubbling up in her stomach. She needed to speak. _Soon._

Frankie, perhaps noticing Lola’s increasing panic, was the first to break the silence. “How are things at the Cantina these days, Mr. Pacini?” 

Lola’s father gave Frankie his trademark kind smile. “Things are good as always. A little slower than usual.” He paused, looking to Lola. “Honestly, I think the wait staff and the usuals miss Lola being around all the time. They’re always asking _‘Where’s your little blue haired girl?’_ I have to tell them that my little girl is growing up. She doesn’t have time to hang around my little Cantina all the time.” He wiped the corners of his eyes, attempting to shake off the emotional moment. “Sorry, I know you hate when I get mushy, Mija. Especially around company.” 

Usually Lola hated her father reminding her that she was his little girl. Usually it made her feel small and immature and discounted as a growing woman, but now she just wished she could keep that image of herself in her father’s head. It was too late now, though. She was growing up, far more than he realized. It was time he knew the truth. 

“I’m sorry, Dad.” Lola said, her voice already getting a little shaky. “You’re right, I am growing up.”

Lola’s father’s face softened. “Oh, Lola. It’s okay. Growing up is a part of life. It’s beautiful. I’m just glad you’re growing up to be a good seed.” 

“Miles and I are having a baby.” Lola blurted the words out, losing all semblance of chill or grace. “I’m pregnant.” 

Mrs. Hollingsworth was the first to react, dropping her fork and creating a large _clash._ “Oh God…” She said, looking to Lola, then Miles. “You’re not. You didn’t get her pregnant.” She seemed to be attempting to speak the outcome she wanted into existence. _Too late._

“You’re doing what now?” Lola’s father’s warm, soft tone had been replaced with a stern, loud one. “Please tell me this is a joke.”

“Sometimes I wish it was.” Lola said, mostly speaking with her stress brain. “I… I know this is a shock. But Dad… Mrs. Hollingsworth... Miles and I are committed to this. And to each other. We’re ready to do whatever it takes.” 

“Do you even know how much it _costs_ to raise a baby?” Mrs. Hollingsworth raised a question, still unable to remove her hand from excessively rubbing her forehead. Miles did the same thing when he was ultra-stressed, Lola noted. 

Miles spoke up instantly, like he’d rehearsed his exact response in his head. But he still spoke with a slight crack in his voice, “We have plenty of money, Mom.” 

Mrs. Hollingsworth stuttered. Lola wondered if she was thinking, ‘ _Yeah, but Lola doesn’t’._ “There’s more to raising a baby than that. _Especially_ when you’re sixteen-!”

“I’m seventeen.” Miles corrected. 

“Same thing.” Mrs. Hollingsworth shot back. She looked calm enough, but her tone was laced with a mix of anger, fear, and desperation. “Lola… I just… you and Miles are both way too young. This is more of a commitment than you two realize. This is…” She fell silent, seemingly lost for words. 

Lola looked over to her father. He was silent. He looked both confused and fuming. “Dad…?” She dared to ask for his thoughts. 

Mr. Pacini finally spoke up, his voice sharp and booming now in a way Lola had never heard before, “How could the two of you let this happen?!” He shifted his gaze to Miles. “You. Did you pressure her or something?”

“Dad, _no_!” Lola cut in before Miles could open his mouth. “It wasn’t like that, at all. I’m just as responsible, okay? Like you said… I’m not a little kid anymore.” She felt her eyes getting watery as she spoke. She hadn’t expected any of this to go well, but actually facing her dad’s disappointment and anger like this, having Miles’ mom look at her like she’d ruined her son’s life… it was hard to swallow. 

Miles took a deep breath, looking like he was steadying his thoughts. “Look, I know this isn’t ideal at all,” he said, looking back and forth between his mother and Lola’s father. “I know it’s probably the last thing you wanted. Lola and I felt that way at first too-” He reached over and held Lola’s hand. “But I _promise_ , I’m more committed to this than I’ve ever been to anything in my whole life. Not just to Lola, but to this baby too. I’m not walking away from this. Ever.” He paused, looked at Lola again. “I- I know we’re both too young. But I’m going to do everything I can to be a good father.”

Lola digested this, thankful her boyfriend was good with words — that was one definite perk of dating a playwright. She was also so grateful he was in a much better place now than he’d been that very first day they’d collided in the hallway, that he was capable of being calm and collected in the midst of a crisis, something she knew he’d had way too much practice with for someone their age. Miles was right, they _were_ too young to be dealing with this — yet, here they were, handling it as best as two teenagers could. She mustered up the courage to speak again. “We know this probably seems totally nuts right now,” Lola admitted, surprising herself with how self-assured her words came out. A few weeks ago, her father’s sharp tone would have turned her into a blubbering mess, but she was more sure of herself now, and of her and Miles’ ability to handle this. “And I don’t blame you guys if you’re super mad or disappointed. But Miles and I are serious about this. I’m going to stay in school, and I still want Miles to go to uni next year. Degrassi has lots of resources for teen parents. And we’ve already been to the doctor more than once.”

“That’s true,” Frankie chimed in, her mouth still stuffed with chicken. She’d been quiet up until now, seemingly unsure of when to butt in and defend the two of them. “Miles and Lola have been super on top of things. I even went to the ultrasound with them.”

Now, Mrs. Hollingsworth’s stern eyes fell on Frankie. “Wait - you _knew_ about this?!” All that warmth in her voice was long gone. “How could you not say anything?”

“Don’t blame Frankie, Mom,” Miles mumbled.

“Ultrasound?” Mr. Pacini questioned. “Wait a minute. Lola, just how far along _are_ you?”

“And how long have you known?” Mrs. Hollingsworth said. “All _three_ of you,” she added, still eyeing Frankie sternly. Lola felt really bad for dragging her best friend into this — it wasn’t like Frankie was the one pregnant. All she was guilty of was trying to support her and her brother through this messed up situation.

“Umm,” Lola stumbled, admittingly feeling a lot less self-assured now. “About...three, almost four months along?” She glanced at Miles, who just nodded along anxiously. “It’s the size of a pear,” she added clumsily, as if some cutesy fact was going to help lighten the mood here. 

Lola’s father was still fuming, although his tone was more frustration and concern than genuine anger. “Why didn’t one of you tell an adult?” he said, directing his question towards all three teenagers, but mostly focusing on his daughter. “Why didn’t you tell _me_?”

“I- I needed time!” Lola stuttered. “We didn’t know what we wanted to do at first. It was _scary_. It still is.” She felt her eyes start to brim with tears as the reality of everything sunk in again. “But this is what we’ve decided to do. We’re keeping this baby,” she said. She looked to Miles, and he nodded in agreement. “And we’re going to need help. But if you can’t give us your support, then…”

…

Frankie watched anxiously as all this drama unfolded around her. It wasn’t too long ago that she’d been the one in deep trouble, scrambling to find the words to explain herself. She understood why both parents were upset, but Miles and Lola were at least trying their best to handle the situation as well as two clueless teenagers could. Frankie didn’t have any idea what she would have done in Lola’s position... she’d never been more glad to be a virgin. She observed her older brother as he chewed at his fingernails nervously, something he used to do as a little kid. It always made their father angry — _Knock that off,_ he’d snap, _you’re not a baby._

“Of course we’re going to help you, Mija,” Mr. Pacini said, and Mrs. Hollingsworth nodded, albeit reluctantly. Frankie breathed a little sigh of relief along with Lola and Miles. “But this is a _very_ big deal,” he added solemnly. “Much bigger than you realize. It’s going to change your lives forever.”

“That’s right,” Mrs. Hollingsworth chimed in. She turned her attention to Miles. “You can forget about going away to university, or that Europe trip.” She paused, looking hesitant, and Frankie wondered just what her mother was about to say. “But… you know… there _is_ still the option of a quiet adoption-”

Miles spoke up right away. “No. Lola and I have already talked about it. That’s not what she wants.”

The confident and assured way Miles was handling this was concrete proof to Frankie that her brother truly was growing and changing. A year earlier, Miles would have just ran away from conflict or just completely self-destructed. Now, he was taking real accountability and standing up for what he believed in. Frankie was honestly proud. 

“Your cousin Marina was adopted, you know?” Lola’s father cut in, speaking directly to his daughter. “Her biological mother gave her up after she tried taking care of Marina alone for a few months. That’s how your cousin ended up with your tía y tio.” 

Frankie looked across the table to evaluate Lola’s expression. If Frankie felt conflicted and confused right now, she could only imagine how Lola was feeling. Frankie understood why Lola’s father was trying to appeal to his daughter and pull on her heart strings, but she hated sitting by and watching her best friend and brother basically be told they’re not responsible enough. 

“Your tía had been trying for almost ten years to have a baby. Marina coming into their life was the biggest blessing they ever had.” Lola’s father continued. 

“But…” Lola started, but it was clear she didn’t quite know what to say. 

“I just want you to think about it.” Her father responded. 

Frankie wasn’t usually the type to stand up and speak, especially when she had no real obligation to step in. However, something compelled her to get involved again. “They’ve thought about it a lot, Mr. Pacini. I’ve seen it. I’ve heard Lola agonize over every possibility. Lola doesn’t just _want_ what’s right for her baby, she needs it.” Frankie looked over to Lola and made eye contact making sure that what she was saying wasn’t out of line. “Since this whole thing started, Lola has made nothing but responsible decisions. Miles too.” Frankie directed her words toward her mom, making sure that both parents knew just how much their children had stepped up. “Please just trust them. They know what they’re getting into.” Frankie slinked down into her seat, feeling a bit self conscious - but not regretful in one bit - about her impassioned speech. 

“I’m sorry, but you _don’t_ know what you’re getting into,” Mrs. Hollingsworth spoke to both Lola and Miles, who, as Frankie noticed, were gripping one another’s hands tight underneath the table for support. “I thought I knew everything when I was pregnant with Miles. I read every book I could get my hands on and took prenatal yoga and got all of the old wives tales from my mother’s friends… My obstetrician actually made special exceptions and answered my calls at all hours of the day and night because I had more questions than she said she had ever had a patient ask.”

“My wife was the same way.” Lola’s father interjected. 

“But when it came down to it, after all of the careful planning and everything, even with a husband who had a stable job in my late twenties… becoming a mother and raising an infant for the first time was the hardest thing I had ever done. Everything had to take a back seat.” She picked up her glass of wine, taking a rather long sip, Frankie noticed. “And that’s just not something you two are ready for. Not even close. Miles honey, just a few months ago, you were spending every day at the hospital visiting Tristan. And just a year before that, you were dealing with addi-”

“ _Mom_ ,” Frankie cut in before her brother went full defense mode. Sheesh. Maybe their mother had a point, but what purpose did bringing up Miles’ past serve except to hurt him? Especially in front of Lola’s dad. 

“You were dealing with what, now?” Mr. Pacini raised his eyebrow. 

“Look, I’m not perfect,” Miles said, his voice much more tense now. “Okay? But I’m not the same stupid kid I was a year ago. Is it so hard to believe I’m capable of change?” He was definitely all worked up now, and Lola looked like she was in desperate need of a stress ball to squeeze. “You can go on and on about how I’m irresponsible and not ready. But ever since Lola told me about this baby, I’ve done nothing but try and step up to do the right thing.” He paused, like he was carefully formulating his next words. Frankie felt her chest get all tight. She’d seen these showdowns between her brother and mom before. She knew from the look in his eyes that he was about to say something that would just set their mother off entirely. “...and I can assure you, I’m going to be a much better father than Dad ever was to me.”

…

The table went completely silent. Lola just sat there staring straight ahead, wishing she could daydream herself out of this whole conversation. She kind of would have preferred everyone just yelled at each other, if she was honest. The long, hard stares and sighs of disappointment were harder to digest. The fierce appetite she’d had earlier was long gone now and had been replaced by a dull ache. She stroked her hand across her stomach reassuringly, partly for her baby and partly for herself. 

“Well,” Mrs. Hollingsworth finally broke the silence, “I think it’d be best to call it a night.” She was gripping her wine glass so tightly that Lola thought she might break it. She turned to Lola’s father, “You have my cell number, right? I’d like the two of us to stay in contact so we can discuss…” She pursed her lips, like she was trying to avoid saying anything along the lines of _pregnancy_ or _baby_ . “...the _situation_ between the kids.” Bingo.

“Absolutely,” Mr. Pacini nodded quickly. He put on his coat and stood up from the table, letting out the most exhausted-sounding groan Lola had ever heard. The last time she had seen him look this tired was when the Cantina tried offering bottomless brunch for a weekend, only to be jam-packed with drunk uni students and Degrassi kids with fakes. “Thank you for dinner, Diana. Mija, let’s get going.”

Following her dad out to the driveway was the absolute last thing Lola wanted to do right now. She knew she couldn’t run forever, but after this dinner, she wasn’t sure she could handle even _more_ lectures and grilling when she got home. She just wanted to curl up in Miles’ arms and cry. “I think I’m just going to stay here with Frankie,” she said meekly, knowing she was really testing the parents’ limits here. “I already packed my sleepover bag.”

“Yeah, we made plans to watch _Twilight_ ,” Frankie chimed in, getting the hint.

Mr. Pacini didn’t even blink. “Absolutely _not_ ,” he said firmly. “Lola, you’re coming straight home with me. And now that you’re dating Miles, I don’t want you sleeping over here. Frankie is welcome at our home another time.”

Mrs. Hollingsworth nodded. “I agree completely.”

“That’s not fair!” Frankie whined to her mom. “So because of _Miles_ , I can’t have my friends sleep over now? We have plans with Shay next weekend!”

“I don’t think Lola will have time for sleepovers for quite awhile,” Mr. Pacini said. “Lola. Get your stuff and let’s go. _Now.”_

Lola squeezed Miles’ hand goodbye and nodded sadly at Frankie, then followed her father out to the driveway, her eyes brimming with tears. She wasn’t carrying this heavy secret around alone anymore, but this dinner had only created more confusion and conflict. She’d been right about one thing: her life was forever different now. 


	17. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola and Miles’ secret slowly begins to unravel at school after their explosive family dinner.

Frankie sat in the passenger seat of Miles’ car, glancing back every once in a while at Hunter as they drove to school. 

“So… why did Mom refuse to even  _ look _ at Miles this morning?” Hunter finally broke the silence, something both Frankie and Miles were anxiously anticipating. Hunter had missed the entire dinner mess the night before, so he was still clueless. “What did you do this time, doofus?” Hunter questioned, reaching forward and attempting to flick Miles on the head. Frankie quickly reached over and slapped her twin brother’s hand out of the way. 

“He didn’t do anything.” Frankie came to her older brother’s defense. “Mom’s just… not happy about the circumstances surrounding his new girlfriend.” 

“So you officially sealed the deal with Lola?” Hunter sat up in his seat, apparently excited by the idea of his brother getting with Lola. Frankie knew that Hunter thought Lola was cute, but his excitement grossed her out. She was never going to get used to her brothers lusting after her friends. 

“You could say that.” Miles replied with a smirk, keeping his eyes on the road. 

Frankie reached over and slapped her older brother’s arm. “Just tell him.” She insisted. “Mom’s probably telling Dad while we’re at school today, so I’m sure it’ll be all blown up by tonight. He might as well know now.” 

The concept of their father finding out that Miles was soon to be a father freaked Frankie out beyond comprehension. She wanted to believe he had come a long way from the physical and mental abuse that had become far too rampant in their family only a couple years prior, but he was still their angry and reputation-focused father. Teen pregnancy wasn’t going to be something he’d just let slide without a reaction. 

“Lola and I…” Miles started. “We’re having a baby.” 

“Baaz owes me ten bucks.” Hunter said immediately, not a drop of shock in his tone. 

“You didn’t  _ know _ .” Frankie replied defensively. She hoped Lola and Miles’ secret wasn’t so obvious to figure out that people had begun betting money on it. 

“You’re right, I didn’t. I just guessed.” Hunter replied in his usual smug tone. “So... Mom is pissed?” 

Frankie thought back to the way her mother’s face fell when she first heard the news.  _ Pissed  _ was probably an understatement. Disappointed, horrified, completely displaced… those might be better words to describe how Diana Hollingsworth seemed to feel since she found out she was going to be a very young grandmother. 

“She’s processing it.” Miles said, sounding more like he was trying to reassure himself than Hunter. “She’s not thrilled, of course, but Lola and I are having this baby whether our parents like it or not.” 

“Rebellious.” Hunter quipped. “But… geez. This is for real? You’re really ready to be a dad? You do know a baby isn’t just a shiny toy you can use to piss off our parents, right?”

“Trust me, I’m aware,” Miles said, visibly annoyed now. “And, no. I’m not ready. But I’m going to have to be. This is my kid, and I’m taking this seriously. So save it, dumbass.”

“I always thought  _ Frankie  _ would be the one to end up getting pregnant by some dummy and pissing dad off beyond belief,” Hunter stated in a very matter of fact way. 

“ _ Shut up. _ ” Frankie rolled her eyes. 

If Hunter had easily guessed and bet money on Lola being pregnant, how many others had taken notice and begun making their own assumptions about Frankie’s brother and best friend? Frankie had a sinking feeling time was quickly running out for this to stay a secret. “You can’t tell anyone,” she added to her twin. “Swear on your computer that you won’t.”

“I won’t,” Hunter said. “But something tells me it won’t be long before the rest of Degrassi figures it out.” Hunter unbuckled his seatbelt as they pulled into the school parking lot, probably eager to go find his nerd friends. “Good luck, bro,” he said to Miles, patting him on the back. “You’re going to need it.”

… 

Frankie entered Degrassi’s halls feeling apprehensive. After the night before and the conversation with Hunter about Lola’s pregnancy, Frankie felt like this secret was bursting at the seams. It wasn’t long before the halls became buzzing with rumors about Lola’s growing bump and involvement with Frankie’s older brother. 

She noticed Jonah in the hallway and quickly dodged him, avoiding all interaction. It would definitely take some time before Frankie could look Jonah in the eye comfortably, let alone talk to him. There was no doubt in her mind that she was nearly over their relationship, but it was still uncomfortable to face head-on. 

As Frankie headed toward her locker, she began noticing more and more people becoming quiet as she walked past, which was never a good sign. If high school students suddenly stop talking, it’s usually because they’re gawking. Frankie avoided eye contact with anyone who stared at her and made a beeline for her locker. 

When Frankie arrived at her locker, Lola was already there waiting. This whole situation was officially and completely unavoidable. 

“Have you noticed people staring?” Lola questioned, sounding pretty paranoid. “Like, since I arrived this morning, it feels like everyone can’t stop looking at me.” 

Frankie observed her surroundings and noticed a few students keeping an eye on their conversation, which definitely made her uneasy. 

“You didn’t tell anyone, did you?” 

“No!” Frankie said instinctively. That wasn’t exactly the truth, but unless Hunter had managed to spread a  _ Gossip Girl  _ mass text to all of Degrassi the instant they pulled into the parking lot, she guessed he wasn’t the source of this. Frankie hadn’t told anybody else. Except. Wait…

Frankie’s eyes immediately gravitated towards the braided-haired girl walking several feet ahead of her. “Give me a second, Lo.” She pushed past the crowd and slung her arm around Esme’s shoulder, yanking her away from her surprised boyfriend. “Zig, I need to steal your girlfriend for a minute,” she said, managing to look cheery still. 

“As long as you don’t steal her for good,” Zig smirked. “Later, babe,” he said to Esme, planting a sloppy kiss on her cheek before disappearing into the crowd. 

“What’s up?” Esme asked, still peppy. 

“I need to talk to you,” Frankie yanked her hand and led her into the girls’ bathroom, locking the door behind them.

Esme looked at Frankie like she’d lost her mind. “What’s your damage, Hollingsworth? You don’t look happy.” 

“People are staring and talking.” Frankie said through gritted teeth. 

“Well duh,” Esme said, placing herself comfortably on one of the bathroom sinks after wiping it down meticulously with a paper towel. “You just whisked me away from my boyfriend for a private moment alone. Everyone probably thinks we’re making out.” 

“Not about that.” Frankie rolled her eyes. Esme’s quips and jokes weren’t appreciated right now. “About Lola. And her…” Frankie placed her hand on her own stomach, signifying Lola’s pregnancy without saying it out loud. She didn’t feel safe openly talking about this in any corner of Degrassi at this point. Lola’s secret wasn’t far from being let out, but Frankie didn’t want to be the one responsible for the drama that would ensue once the whole school knew. Frankie had decided after seeing the ultrasound for the first time that she’d do nearly anything in her power to protect her niece or nephew and help her best friend and brother. Spreading their secret was  _ not  _ helpful. “Did you tell anyone?” 

Esme furrowed her brow. “I would never, and I’m a little hurt you’d accuse me of that.” Her voice sounded genuine, but Frankie knew Esme had a knack for manipulation. 

“Esme, don’t bullshit me.” Frankie said, a little harsher than she’d meant to. The last thing she wanted was to start this friendship off on a bad foot, or end it altogether, but she couldn’t just blindly believe Esme. Outside of Hunter, Esme was the only one directly  _ told _ about Lola’s pregnancy. It wasn’t outside of the realm of possibility to believe Esme let it slip. 

Esme scoffed. “You really think I care enough about Lola and Miles’ little love child to blab to the whole school? Please.”

Frankie really wanted to believe Esme was sincere, that she wasn’t the manipulative witch everyone pegged her for. But Frankie had never been good at trusting people- she supposed she had her father and, to a lesser extent, Jonah to thank for that. She wanted to trust Esme. But this  _ was  _ the same girl who’d led her older brother down a drug-ridden spiral just a few semesters ago. Frankie couldn’t just allow herself to be naive about her, not when Lola’s secret was at stake. Maybe Esme had just been playing her all along, airing out her secrets and laughing behind her back. “I  _ knew  _ I shouldn’t have told you,” Frankie said, the words just kind of stumbling out now, and she knew something hurtful was about to slip out. “Miles always said you were a good liar… maybe he was right.”

“I’m not  _ lying. _ ” The sweetness from Esme’s tone had been completely absorbed at this point. “I didn’t say anything to anyone, Frankie. I wouldn’t do that to you. We’re… friends.” Esme choked a little before she said the word ‘friends’. Frankie couldn’t discern if it was emotion that choked Esme or discomfort with the concept of having a friend. 

Frankie couldn’t quite explain what it was, whether it was Esme’s wounded expression or the way she had choked on her words, but something in her suddenly fully believed Esme. Her stomach dropped, and the anger she’d had just seconds ago had suddenly been replaced by a quick need to fix everything. She opened her mouth to begin apologizing, but Esme, offended by Frankie’s accusations, continued into a rant. “Maybe our peers came to the crazy conclusion that Lola’s knocked up because Miles and Lola spend every waking second together and Lola can’t fit into any of her pants anymore.” Esme sniped. 

_ There’s classic Esme _ , Frankie thought. Having more understanding and experience with Esme now, however, Frankie was able to discern that Esme wasn’t just being a bitch. She was actually right. Lola’s baby wasn’t the size of a grape anymore. According to Lola’s pregnancy app, the baby was growing little peach fuzz on their head now. Maybe this secret, and baby, was too big to hide. Rather than interrupting Esme, Frankie let her continue. Sometimes a girl just needed to rant. 

“Lola’s boobs have gotten huge, she went from barely being able to keep down lunch to getting double servings almost every day, she’s eating candy in class constantly…” Esme was really listing these reasons off. “The last English assignment that Miles read in front of the class was about  _ taking personal responsibility  _ and being better than our parents were.” 

“So it’s becoming obvious.” Frankie finished Esme’s thought, feeling slightly resigned. 

“Your girl’s secret is leaking. I almost made a joke about other stuff that’s gonna start leaking from her soon, but that’s too gross, even for me.” Esme walked toward the door, seeming ready to unlock it and leave. “I’m not mad, Franks. Maybe disappointed.” Esme’s tone really wasn’t too serious, which made Frankie hopeful that this bump in the road wasn’t going to cause long-term damage for their budding friendship. “I don’t tell people’s secrets. Especially people I actually care about.” 

Esme expressing that she cared about Frankie caused the hairs on the back of Frankie’s neck to stand up slightly. Frankie had no idea what it was, or what it meant, but Esme was surprisingly one of the most genuine people she had ever met. A little rough around the edges for sure, and she had some problems she needed to sort out, but so did Frankie and everyone else. 

“I care about you too.” Frankie said. “I’m sorry I accused you of telling people. I guess we all want to pretend this isn’t happening as quickly as it is.” She sighed. “But I… I shouldn’t have said that stuff about you. Whatever happened between you and my brother isn’t my business. You’re…” God, why was talking suddenly  _ so  _ difficult. “You’re not a bad person. I know that.”

Esme absorbed this. She nodded, seeming to accept the apology, but still clearly hurt. “Have you told your parents yet?” she inquired. 

“It wasn’t pretty.” Frankie responded, thinking back to the night before and recoiling slightly. “But it’s only the beginning of the mess that is now our lives.”

A knock on the bathroom door interrupted their conversation. Zig’s voice boomed through the door, muffled heavily. “Can I have my girlfriend back before the bell rings?” 

Esme’s face lit up when she heard Zig’s voice through the door. “I should probably get back to Ziggy,” she said, her hand now placed on the lock, ready to unlock it. “Make everything up to me tonight over chips and guacamole at Lola’s Cantina?”

Frankie softened, relieved she hadn’t completely sabotaged this new friendship. For a girl known for her scandals and drama, Esme was surprisingly forgiving. Esme was surprisingly a  _ lot _ of things, Frankie was learning. “Yeah, okay… as long as we get queso too,” Frankie said, letting herself smile a little.

“We can order whatever you want— you’re paying.” Esme allowed a smile to commandeer her features. Before Frankie could respond, Esme clicked the lock of the bathroom door and opened the door, prancing away with Zig.

Frankie shut the door behind her and quickly locked the door again. She just needed another minute or two before braving the halls again. If everyone was staring and talking, it was only a matter of time before some bold person started asking questions. If Esme weren’t on the inside, that person would probably be her. The last thing Frankie needed was someone approaching her in the hall and asking her a direct question about Miles and Lola’s predicament. Frankie completely sucked at lying, especially when she was caught off guard.

And…  _ everything _ about Esme made Frankie feel caught off guard.

…

Lola lingered in the hallway near her locker, a bit annoyed that Frankie had seemingly ditched her for Esme. She didn’t know what exactly was going on between her bestie and Esme, but did it  _ have  _ to be dealt with right this minute? It felt like every pair of eyeballs in the hall was staring at her, zeroing in on her stomach. Was she just being paranoid, or did she really have a reason to worry?

Nothing was normal these days, not at school or at home. Since the dinner, Lola’s dad had alternated between barely looking at her and talking her ear off about how wonderful adoption could be. Plus, he kept insisting she try these traditional Argentinian drinks and medicines, something about making sure the baby’s head was getting shaped right. It was driving her nuts. 

Once it became obvious that Frankie wasn’t coming back in time before the bell, Lola gave up on waiting around and went in search of Miles, the only person who could make her feel even remotely stable right now. She walked down the hall in a daze of her thoughts, trying her best to ignore the feeling that everyone was watching. 

“Hey! Careful!”

_ Whoops.  _ Lola snapped out of her trance and looked up at a very startled Baaz clutching his books. She’d been so focused on trying  _ not  _ to pay attention to people that she’d bumped right into him. He was probably one of the last people she wanted to talk to right now, but she still felt bad for almost knocking him over. “Oh my gosh, I’m sorry…!” she rambled. 

“Don’t worry about it,” Baaz sighed. He stared at Lola for a little longer than just a second, and she started to feel uneasy. It felt like she was walking around with a milk moustache or something. He broke his gaze and reached into his pocket, pulling out a crumpled ten dollar bill. “Hey- you’ve got first period with Hunter, right? Give this to him for me, will you?”

Lola cocked her head to the side slightly. “What, did he pay for your lunch the other day or something?” 

“Just some money I owe him from an old bet.” Baaz’s eyes migrated slowly down to Lola’s chest before darting back up to her face. Lola couldn’t tell if this was just normal Baaz weirdness or if he was treating her differently. Maybe she was just paranoid. 

Not wanting to question it any further, Lola grabbed the crumpled up money from Baaz’s hand and continued her trek down the hallway. If she wanted to get to Miles before the bell rang and she had to rush to history class, she needed to pick up her pace a bit. 

“Lola, over here!” Grace called out from across the hall. Grace, Jonah, Rasha and Miles were all huddled together by Rasha’s locker. 

“Did I miss a memo or something?” Lola said as she approached the group. “Hey.” She said softly to Miles in particular. 

Miles smiled at Lola’s greeting, then began explaining. “I was just, uh… sharing some of the recent script changes with our cast and crew. Rasha was worried that I was writing Coma Boy out completely since, uh…” Miles was at a bit of a loss for words. 

“We were all just worried since…” Grace trailed off, seeming to not know how to phrase what she wanted to say. “Since the source material has changed so much recently. We just want to make sure we’re _ up to date _ .” 

“What does that mean?” Lola spoke, her voice sounding much more defensive than she originally intended. She was beginning to feel like a hormonal ticking time bomb. Every time anyone looked at her she felt like they were judging her or that they knew her secret. All of the control and security that she felt she had in this situation was melting away like a big ice cream cone in the middle of summer and she hated it immensely. 

“I just don’t want a showmance messing up what we’ve been working so hard for.” Jonah cut in. “This is basically my senior project. Distractions aren’t welcome here.” 

Jonah always knew exactly which buttons to push to either annoy the crap out of someone or really stress them out. This time, he was doing both. One of the many reasons Lola was glad he was no longer involved with Frankie. 

“Nothing’s gonna get in the way of us putting on a fantastic show.” Miles reassured, though his voice sounded slightly less steady. “Don’t worry about anything, guys.” He looked toward Lola, raising his brows. “Got a second to catch up before class?” 

“Definitely.” Lola was glad there was still time for them to talk privately. That was all she wanted to begin with. 

Grace reached her arm out for Lola before the two could depart. “Actually, Lola… could we talk for a minute, just you and me?” 

Lola reluctantly nodded and stepped aside with Grace. As much as Lola had tried over the years, Grace had never pulled Lola aside for girl talk in the past. There was a pretty slim chance that this conversation wasn’t going somewhere stressful. “What’s up?” Lola asked, trying to be nonchalant.

“I don’t want to offend you, or overstep...” Grace said.  _ Not a great start,  _ Lola thought. She was pretty sure she knew exactly where the rest of this conversation was going and it made her heart race in the worst way. “Are you pregnant?” 

Of course Grace would be the one to just outright ask. Lola should’ve expected for this to happen sooner or later, but it still left her stunned, standing there like a deer in headlights. Her hands reached unconsciously to caress her stomach, something she had begun doing more and more as the baby inside grew. “I’m…” She felt the small bump where her once-flat stomach was. There was no denying her body had changed a noticeable amount since the beginning of the semester. It was probably obvious to everyone who walked past. They had probably known for weeks. “Yes.” She finally confirmed. There was no point in lying. 

Grace’s eyes widened at Lola’s not-so-big reveal. She was probably just more shocked that Lola admitted it in the middle of the hallway. Grace looked around and moved closer, attempting to be a bit more discreet and quiet with the sensitive information she had just learned. “Okay, so… what does this mean for the play?” 

“What do you mean?” Lola questioned, a bit defensive but also genuinely confused. It wasn’t like she was going out on maternity leave next week. 

“I mean…” Grace started, trying to keep her voice down. “Are you still gonna have time for rehearsals? Can you still do all your scenes with…” Grace gestured to her stomach to finish her sentence 

“Of course I can,” Lola said. It wasn’t like she was a stunt double in an action movie. This was a high school play they were talking about. Even if Grace was coming from a genuine place, it still irritated Lola a little that people were already seeing her differently, like she was less capable now. She could only imagine how much worse that sentiment was going to get over the next few months as the baby and the size of her bump grew.

Grace nodded, not seeming all that convinced. “Okay… look, we’re not trying to get into your business. It’s just… if it affects the play, it affects all of us.”

“Well, it won’t, so...” The first bell rang. Lola desperately wanted to make an exit from this conversation already, but something held her back. “Wait,” she added to Grace, then brought her voice to a whisper, “How long have you known? About me being… pregnant?”

“I guessed a while ago,” Grace shrugged. “Jonah too.”  _ Great _ , Lola thought. “Lola, I’m not here to spread your secrets around. I swear. But… girl to girl? I’m pretty sure most of the school has caught on by now.” 

Grace gave Lola what felt like a sympathetic glance, then turned away, disappearing into the hall in a blur. The second bell rang, but Lola couldn’t bring her pair of purple sneakers to take a single step. She leaned against her locker, watching as the crowd around her got smaller and smaller. Third bell— she was officially tardy now, but what did that even matter anymore? Everyone knew now. Nobody in this school was ever going to look at her the same way again. She’d survived embarrassing herself in Mandarin class, accidentally showing a vibrator off to Tiny and his friends, having a meltdown in class about Shay dating her ex… but this was different. A pregnancy wasn’t something you could just live down, especially given the scandalous circumstances their baby had been conceived under. Even at a place as crazy as Degrassi.

Her phone went off with a faint  _ ding _ . She reached into her sweats pocket and checked the notification from the pregnancy tracker app:  _ Your baby is a busy bee, growing peach fuzz, building its bones, and sucking its thumb. Enjoy some time to yourself while you still can. _

With the hall around her largely empty now, she allowed herself to just let out a loud  _ sob _ . What in the hell was she doing?

As if he could read her mind, a text from Miles popped up on her phone just then.  _ Up for ditching class this morning? Meet me in the theater dressing room. _


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Lola and Miles take the morning off from school, Lola comes back and begins to realize she has no choice but to face the rumors head on.

Miles opened the dressing room door for Lola and took a seat on the counter, inviting Lola to do the same beside him. “So… now we have  _ more _ people to worry about letting down.” Miles said, referring to the pressure Grace and Jonah had just placed on them. 

“Yeah… I know,” Lola sighed. To be honest though, disappointing Jonah and Grace wasn’t exactly the top of her worries. She was more focused on the fact that the whole school probably knew her secret now. That, and the fact that she was actually going to have to walk around pregnant for the next several months. In the past week, their baby had gone from being a secret between mostly just the two of them to being  _ real _ . “Miles, everyone knows,” she said, choking on her words as they came out. “Not Just Jonah and Grace, but  _ everyone.  _ Like, all of Degrassi can’t stop staring at me…”

“Well, they were going to figure it out eventually,” Miles muttered, rubbing his forehead like he was trying to fend off a headache. Lola knew he wasn’t intentionally trying to dismiss her, but the way he just shrugged it off still bugged her. Like it was so easy to get used to everyone knowing you were knocked up.

“Not this soon!” Lola said, more worked up than she’d realized. “I thought I’d have more time before I started showing. I’m already  _ huge _ .” She knew the last point was a bit of an exaggeration considering the actual size of her bump, but she couldn’t help feeling like a hippo looking at herself in the mirror at that moment. “I’m gaining weight like crazy, my feet are all swollen, I keep getting weird cravings for pistachio ice cream at two in the morning…” she rambled, suddenly just airing out every little thing that had been bothering her lately. “And I can’t even dye my hair for at least five months! Do you know how bad my roots are gonna get?”

Miles seemed to be in a bit of a daze, chewing at his fingernails and staring straight into space. It was clear he hadn’t absorbed a word of Lola’s little rant. She waved a hand in front of his face to bring him back to focus. “Did you hear me?” she snapped.  _ “Roots _ !”

Miles looked up, still seemingly out of it. “Huh? Yeah, sorry, I just…” He sighed, more agitated than Lola had seen him in a while. “I got a text from my dad a few minutes ago. Let’s just say he hasn’t been this upset since Mom filed for divorce. Just…  _ everyone  _ is on my ass today. Him, my mom, Frankie, Jonah, Grace…”

“Your crazy pregnant girlfriend...” Lola added.

Miles frowned. “I didn’t say that,” he shot back. “Look, I’m just stressed, okay? My phone has been blowing up all morning with texts from my parents asking how we’re going to pay for all this. My dad says he won’t give us a single cent and he’s threatening to give my trust fund to the twins if I can’t prove I’m responsible. Mom says he’s bluffing, but she’s not exactly going out of her way to help make my case either.”

“I’m sorry, what?” Lola was shocked. “How are you supposed to prove that to him? His standards are like, impossible.” She began chewing on her nails, a habit that she thought she had outgrown years ago when she discovered nail polish. Usually keeping an unchipped manicure was more important than whatever stress she was going through. Definitely not this time. 

“I don’t know, Lola.” Miles said. 

Lola’s stress broke through in her tone. “Having your parents help financially isn’t, like, an  _ option.  _ We need to make things work with them. You saw the bills from the ultrasound. Pregnancy only gets more expensive from here on out. Then there’ll be diapers, and…” 

“You think I don’t know?” Miles interrupted Lola abruptly. His voice was loud but it wasn’t angry. He mostly sounded scared. “The one thing my stupid dad is supposed to be good for is his stupid money. That’s the one thing he’s always provided. Couldn’t provide basic love and affection, but at least he always paid away our troubles where he could.” Miles paused. “I know I’ve fucked up, but it just feels like he doesn’t even want to give me a chance. Like he already wrote me off years ago and he’s just waiting for the first chance he gets to cut me out and finally have his perfect family.”

It truly did seem like Mr. Hollingsworth had some sort of grudge against Miles at times. That was something Lola could never understand. Miles was right, he had his fair share of mistakes in the past, but what teenager hadn’t? Even his own siblings weren’t held to the ridiculous standards Miles was. “The way he treats you isn’t fair.” Lola stated the obvious. She wished she knew what else to say in this situation. Unlike Miles, she wasn’t a writer who seemed to always have the perfect words. 

“We’ve known that for years. I don’t think that’s gonna change.” Miles said. “What are we gonna do?”

“Prove that we’re responsible together.” Lola stepped toward Miles. Something about seeing the person she cared about so much feeling so hopeless lit a fire in her. “Prove him wrong. Prove everyone wrong.” 

“Everyone?” Miles questioned. 

Lola nodded. “Everyone who tells us we’re not responsible enough, or can’t do this. Your parents, my dad, the losers at Degrassi who never fail to have an opinion about everything…” She didn’t quite know where this surge of confidence had come from or if she even fully believed the words she was saying, but what other option did they have? Let everyone decide for them that they weren’t responsible enough, that they couldn’t do this? To say she felt unprepared to be a parent was an understatement, but she and Miles already loved their baby more than she thought it was possible to love anything in this world. They  _ had _ to prove everyone wrong. For their baby and for each other.

Miles pulled Lola into his lap and planted a kiss on the back of her bright blue head. “I really do know how to make a mess, don’t I?” He rubbed Lola’s shoulders and sighed.

Lola felt her stress levels immediately go down as Miles massaged her neck. She fully intended to milk her boyfriend’s masseuse skills for the rest of this pregnancy. Probably even after that. “Hey… we made this mess  _ together _ , remember?” She slid his hands down and placed them on her bump.

Miles finally allowed a smile to crack through. “You know... my dad can have his perfect little family,” he said quietly. He kissed the top of Lola’s head, and added, “I’ve got mine.”

Lola sighed contentedly, no longer nearly as freaked. Miles always knew just what to say to make her cheeks turn rosy, even if they’d been snapping at each other just minutes beforehand. She reached into her pocket and pulled out the ten dollar bill from Baaz. “Hey, um… any idea what Baaz owes Hunter this for? He said it was an old bet of some sort..”

Miles stared at the money for a second, then made a face like a light bulb had just gone off in his head. “Yeah,” Miles muttered. “Yeah, I have a  _ pretty  _ good idea.” He snatched the money out of Lola’s hands like she was a kid holding a sucker. “You know… we’ve still got the rest of this class period, plus break. What do you say we use these nerds’ money and treat ourselves to some coffee while we brainstorm how exactly we’re going to prove everyone wrong? My brother will never know.”

Lola matched his devilish smirk. “I like when you get all rebellious,” she said, leaning into his shoulders. “But um, I can’t have caffeine, remember? Unless you want our baby to be born with two heads.”

“Oh er, right,” Miles stumbled. They were both still getting used to acknowledging the pregnancy and all the weird little quirks and rules that came with it. Lola supposed trying to do the right things for her body was one step towards proving responsibility for this baby. A baby step, but still. “Well… hot chocolate then? Apple cider?”

Lola’s eyes lit up. “Wait, no… let’s get milkshakes!”

Miles laughed. “Milkshakes? It’s not even nine a.m.”

“Cravings have no schedule,” Lola shrugged. “Come on, don’t strawberry milkshakes from The Dot sound like heaven?” She turned around to face him and batted her eyelashes. “We’re being rebellious, remember?”

Miles planted another kiss on Lola’s head. “You have a weird definition of rebellious.” He leapt off the counter and held his hand out to her. “Alright,” he gave in with a genuine smile now. “Milkshakes. For the three of us.”

...

Lola was feeling slightly better when Miles dropped her off at the steps of Degrassi. He needed to go find a parking spot, plus the bell was only a few short minutes from ringing. Lola had already skipped one class today. The last thing she needed was to be late for the next one. She avoided eye contact with most everyone as she made a beeline toward Mr. Perino’s classroom. Whether or not people were staring or gossiping about her, she wasn’t going to let it bug her… at least not until she could get home and cry into her pillow about it. 

“Miss Pacini, glad you could join us.” Mr. Perino put on a fake chipper voice as Lola approached the classroom. “The teacher from your last class said not to expect your presence when we crossed paths in the teacher’s lounge. Glad  _ my  _ class is worth attending!” 

“Wasn’t feeling well.” Lola responded, not caring to match Mr. Perino’s faux-niceness. Was it normal for teachers to discuss whether or not a specific student attended their class? Did the rumors of her pregnancy run so deep through the Degrassi halls that it had even intercepted the teacher’s lounge? She’d like to think her teachers had better things to talk about than the personal lives of their students, but she wouldn’t be surprised if the administration that was in control of her education was just as petty and gossip-centric at their core as the students themselves. She couldn’t lie, if she was dealing with a bunch of teenagers all day she’d probably treat their drama as her own personal soap opera too. 

Lola took her seat next to Yael and got as settled in and comfortable as she could while feeling like every eye in the classroom was on her. The words Grace said about how the whole school had probably already figured out her secret rung through her head over and over. She hated feeling this insecure - like there was a huge spotlight on her. Yael’s voice interrupted Lola’s train of thought.

“Are you feeling okay?” They leaned over and questioned nicely. Unlike Mr. Perino, Yael’s niceness wasn’t fake. A bit unnatural and uncharacteristic, definitely, but Lola could tell Yael was genuinely concerned. 

“Yeah, I’m good.” Lola adjusted in her seat. “Why? What’d you hear?”

Yael raised an eyebrow. “Nothing?” They said, then quickly seemed to walk it back. “I mean… I’ve heard some rumors about you, I just wanted to make sure you were  _ physically _ okay. And… I guess, mentally?” 

Lola didn’t really feel like playing dumb. She was mentally exhausted from hiding this secret and worrying about what people would think. Yael already knew from the sounds of it, and they genuinely just wanted to check in on Lola, so… “I’m okay, physically. Mentally a little messed up, but I guess stress is expected in my situation…” She dipped her toes into the  _ ‘casually talking about being pregnant to people other than Frankie or Miles’ _ pool and it didn’t make her want to immediately combust, that was definitely a step in the right direction. 

“So it’s true?” Yael fished for official confirmation and Lola simply nodded, which made Yael’s jaw drop. They definitely already knew, but hearing it right from the horse’s mouth was bound to shock anyone. 

Before either party could speak more, Mr. Perino entered the classroom and shut the door behind him. This conversation would have to continue later. 

…

The moment the bell rang signifying the end of the class period, Yael turned toward Lola. “Is there anything I can do?” They asked.

“Um, what do you mean?” Lola asked, completely thrown off by the question. She had honestly gotten so engrossed in Mr. Perino’s lecture about Canadian Immigration that she had almost forgotten that she had officially revealed her news to Yael at the beginning of class. 

“For the… you know, your  _ situation _ .” Yael said. At least they were trying to keep the conversation about Lola’s not-so-secret under wraps. Lola always appreciated that Yael wasn’t all about sensational stories and the hottest gossip. For the most part, when they weren’t lowkey shading Lola for being into girly things like makeup and clothes, Yael was pretty cool. “I’m here to help.” 

Lola collected her notebooks and pens and tossed them into her bag, quickly packing up to catch up with Yael who had somehow packed all of their things into their backpack neatly the moment the bell rang. “I mean… I don’t really know how you  _ can  _ help. Miles and I are figuring it out.” 

A voice came up from behind as Lola and Yael stood up from their seats. Hunter. “Hey Lola… How ya feeling?” He started awkwardly. He obviously knew but wasn’t fully comfortable saying more. 

“Yael knows now.” Lola said. 

Hunter let out a big sigh of relief. “Good! I was gonna have  _ so  _ much trouble keeping that one a secret. I almost told Vijay just now but I barely held my tongue. This is all so weird.” He paused looking to Yael, who gave him a disapproving look. “I don’t mean weird, it’s just… um…” He was failing to find a better way to phrase what he wanted to say. Hunter was never great at cushioning anything. 

Lola rolled her eyes. “Doesn’t everyone basically know by now anyway?” 

“Not for sure.” Hunter responded, pulling his phone out of his pocket and scrolling through his notifications as the three teenagers exited the classroom into the hallway. “But… yeah, most people think you’re probably carrying my brother’s seed.” 

“I just wish I had taken control of this whole thing earlier… Gotten a chance to tell everyone on my own terms...” Lola admitted. “I guess people are gonna talk crap either way, so it doesn’t really matter…” 

“It’s not too late,” Yael said. “People have made assumptions.”

“Pretty clear assumptions.” Hunter said, causing Yael to shove an elbow in his ribs to shut him up. “Sorry. It’s not that bad, I promise. Just a few rumors.” He added rather awkwardly and insincerely.

“Like I was saying before this ass with no social skills butted in…” Yael continued. “They don’t know for sure. You could still tell them on your own terms.” Yael offered an idea. “What if you announced it in a vlog?” 

Lola scoffed. “And tell the  _ whole world _ my big secret instead of just everyone I know and love?” 

“What if it’s not your secret? What if it’s your  _ story _ ?” Yael pitched. 

They were planting a tiny seed in Lola’s brain, but subjecting herself to possible full on public humiliation sounded way too scary. Not to mention she was sure her father and Miles’ parents would hate something like this being highly publicized. The last thing she wanted was to make things more tense. 

“I dunno.” Lola said after considering it for a moment. Her stomach was starting to turn imagining the views rolling in and everyone sharing the video in their group chats and talking crap about her. If she were to post anything about her pregnancy the comments would for sure need to be monitored if not turned off altogether. Teen pregnancy may always be a trending topic, but not for any good reason. “I’ll consider it.” She said honestly. It wasn’t the worst idea, it was just… intimidating. Even though she knew the time was coming where she couldn’t even pretend to hide what was happening, she still wasn’t near comfortable broadcasting it to the entire Internet. That was like purposefully throwing yourself into the flames. 

“Of course. Just let me know.” Yael said softly, not pushing Lola any more. “Still on for the vlog squad meeting tomorrow after school? We’re discussing what the winter holds for our channel.” 

Lola nodded in agreement before parting ways with Yael in the hallway. She was still so uneasy at the concept of letting the whole world know her secret, but there wasn’t really much more time or choice for her. Luckily the school day was almost over. Even though she still had to brave a shift at the cantina, she’d just be glad to be away from the leering, judgmental eyes of her peers. And at least there was a new nacho special at the Cantina.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Miles gets involved in an unexpected conflict at Lola's cantina.

Frankie scanned the hallways for Esme after the final bell rang signifying the end of the school day. She had been on edge all day. Though nobody had directly asked her about Lola or Miles, she could definitely feel more eyes on her than usual. Frankie’s eyes fell on Jonah, who was standing up against a locker chatting up Grace.  _ Ignore it,  _ she thought. Now was the time to move on, not get caught up on stupid ex-boyfriend drama. 

“Ready for our date?” Esme suddenly appeared behind Frankie, taking the brunette girl by surprise. 

“Affirmative.” Frankie confirmed, happy to be in the presence of someone who wasn’t judging her or secretly wanting to pry for her secrets for the first time in hours. “You, me, a big bowl of guacamole?” She proposed.

“I’ve been waiting my whole life.” Esme teased. “You driving?” 

Frankie nodded, holding up her set of keys. “I just need to see if Lola needs a ride to the Cantina.” 

Esme raised a brow. “Am I allowed to talk about…” She said, following Frankie as she made her way down the hallway searching for Lola. 

“I haven’t told her that you know yet...” Frankie responded knowing Esme was referring to the pregnancy news. “Maybe let her tell you on her own terms?” 

“Like that’s gonna happen. Lola wouldn’t tell me if her  _ dog  _ was pregnant.” 

“Well, Fernando is a boy…” Frankie said, though she knew that wasn’t the point. Lola and Esme had zero established history outside of minor drama. It was pretty unlikely that Lola was going to spill her guts with Esme in the car. “I don’t really want her to know I told you.” Frankie admitted. She had felt sort of guilty since the moment she told Esme Lola’s secret. It was never really her place, but… technically Esme guessed. Not that that fact made the fact that Frankie had technically betrayed her best friend by telling her secret any better. 

“You know what I mean.” Esme rolled her eyes. “So I just gotta play dumb?” 

Frankie’s eyes finally fell on a short tuft of blue hair from across the hallway. “Would you mind?” She asked with a fake grin plastered onto her face. The last thing she needed was to start more drama with Lola by revealing that she had blabbed to Esme a while ago. 

“Whatever, sure...” Esme said after a bit of hesitation. “Hey, Lola!” She quickly changed her tone when Lola was in earshot. 

“Hey, Esme…” Lola greeted Esme cautiously. 

“Esme is going to carpool with us to the Cantina, is that cool?” Frankie asked. The way the question was posed, though, didn’t really give Lola much of a choice. Frankie apologized silently with her eyes. She knew Lola was probably on edge at the moment and really didn’t want extra company, but Frankie wasn’t really wanting to ditch Esme either. “We’re grabbing dinner.” Frankie clarified. 

“You and Esme are?” Lola asked, her tone clearly dripping with a bit of confusion. 

In typical fashion, Esme couldn’t help but cut in. “Yeah, Franks and I are basically dating.” She said, wrapping her arm around Frankie. Esme never passed up a chance to make someone slightly uncomfortable or uneasy. 

“She’s kidding.” Frankie clarified. She allowed Esme’s arm to remain around her shoulder, though. 

Lola just shook her head. With the kind of day she’d probably had, Frankie had to assume this Esme stuff was the least of her best friend’s concerns. “Actually, I’m riding with Miles,” she said, sounding tired. “He’s helping me out with my shift. He said making sure I spend less time on my pretty feet is the least he could do…” Frankie observed as Lola paused and studied Esme, like she was trying to gage her reaction to the vague hint. She didn’t think Lola was at a point where she was actively  _ telling  _ people about the pregnancy, but with the whole school pretty much knowing by now, she seemed to care less about keeping it a total secret. 

“Good for you, Lola,” Esme said, seeming genuine. “You should  _ always  _ take advantage of the patriarchy.”

Lola smiled meekly, and Frankie hoped it was a sign she was warming up to Esme. She knew Lola had never been Esme’s biggest fan per say, but she also knew that Lola Pacini could pretty much make a friend out of anyone. “Yeah…” Lola said. She took a long pause, and Frankie eyed her. “So, uh, if you didn’t already know, I’m pregnant.”

Frankie’s jaw nearly dropped. She couldn’t believe Lola was willingly opening up like this, and to  _ Esme  _ of all people.

“What? Really?” Esme seemed to genuinely try to fake her surprise. For a good liar, she sure was sucking at this, Frankie thought… but it was a nice effort. And once again Esme was saving her butt by not revealing that Frankie had already technically blabbed Lola’s secret. “Never would have guessed,” Esme added. “How far along? And is it Miles’?” Frankie wanted to elbow her for that last part.

“Almost four months,” Lola sighed, caressing the middle of her top, which was noticeably tight. Lola still kept her voice down, but she seemed to be getting more comfortable openly talking about it. “And yeah. Miles is the dad.”

Esme nodded. “Cool. Well, tell him to give us a discount on our chips and guac.”

“Let’s get going,” Frankie cut in, pulling Esme away while the conversation was still going well. “See you there, Lo.” As relieved as Frankie was about the way that convo went, she was just  _ starving _ .

… 

Lola stared at the familiar trees and buildings swiftly passing her by in the passenger side window of Miles’ car. The drive from Degrassi to the Cantina was short and burned into her brain. It was sort of comforting to see the same things nearly everyday. Lola was never a huge fan of change. She looked over to Miles and allowed her stressed brain to rest for a moment. Just like the cupcakery, the hardware store and the big chestnut tree on her route to work, she never really got sick of looking at Miles. 

“How do you think it’s gonna be at the Cantina now that your Dad knows?” Miles asked, breaking the comfortable silence between the two. 

“Well, I’m sure at this point  _ everyone  _ knows.” Lola said. “It’s Cantina culture. Everything _ is super _ tight knit. Secrets aren’t a thing. At the Cantina, they call any private information _ ‘news’ _ and spread it like it’s the morning announcements.” 

Miles sighed. “Great. So… should I be expecting congratulations or for the cooks to take me out back and teach me a lesson?” 

Lola shrugged. “Honestly? Probably a bit of both. Nobody’s gonna harm a hair on your head, though. A lot of them have just known me since I was two feet tall. I’m sure  _ this _ is a bit of a shock.” She referred down to her bump, which looked much more accentuated when she was seated. “But most of them are like family. They just want the best for me.” 

“Is that me?” Miles asked, seeming partially serious but keeping his tone light. He kept his eyes looking straight toward the road as they approached the Cantina and Miles pulled into a parking spot. He put the car in park and let out a sigh. He looked like he just needed a moment to relax, so Lola reached over and placed a light kiss on his cheek before grabbing his right hand and lightly massaging it. 

“Of course it is.” She said, her fingers slowly tracing the lines in his palms and observing them. “I wonder if our baby will have your hands or mine…” She allowed herself to fantasize for a moment about tiny baby hands with stubby little fingers and fingernails smaller than tic-tacs. 

Miles pulled the keys out of the ignition with his left hand and tossed the keys in his jacket pocket, allowing Lola to keep caressing his other hand. “I hope they get everything from you.” He gripped Lola’s hand tightly, causing Lola’s heart to skip a beat. 

Every time Lola and Miles were alone, Lola just wanted to pause the moment and live in it forever. Things were just so...imperfectly perfect. Even though the future terrified her and the past few weeks were a complete whirlwind, there was nobody she’d rather be holding hands with in the Cantina parking lot. He just felt like… home. Lola knew her shift started in a few short minutes, but she would gladly take a light scolding for a few more moments of quiet solace with her person. She had truly never felt like this before about anybody. Adoration and admiration didn’t cover it. There was another word for how he made her swoon, but any time she attempted to let it roll off her tongue she felt like her brain turned to mush and her heart started racing a million miles a minute. She knew there was a pretty likely chance that he would say it back, but she was still just afraid to let the words fall out. 

“Let’s go in.” Miles said after a moment, squeezing Lola’s hand one more time before finally letting it go and exiting the car. He quickly walked around to the passenger side and opened Lola’s door for her, reuniting their hands and escorting her to the front door of the Cantina. 

…

Walking into the Cantina felt a lot like walking into the halls of Degrassi: there was no shortage of stares and whispers. Unlike Degrassi students though, Lola’s coworkers didn’t bother trying to be subtle about their gossip. 

Right away, a few of the waitresses gawked at Miles and Lola holding hands. Belinda whistled from the kitchen. “Oy! Who’s the handsome  _ chico _ , Lola?”

Lola turned red as all eyes fell on her. “Um, you remember Miles. My… _boyfriend_.” She knew it was kind of silly considering she was literally carrying his child, but it still gave her goosebumps to call him that. She’d never introduced a boy to all her coworkers like this.

Miles waved nervously, his cheeks turning a similar color. “I’m gonna go start cleaning tables out back,” he said to Lola, clearly wanting to get away from the spotlight before anyone clobbered him. He gave her a peck on the cheek before he turned to go, and another one of the waiters whistled loudly.

Once Miles was out of sight, Lola cautiously made her way into the kitchen. She didn’t bother trying to cover her bump with her apron at this point— everyone probably already knew, and if they didn’t, they might as well know now. There was no point in trying to hide anymore. Lola had a long several months ahead of her, and she was only going to get more pregnant from here on out. She was going to have to get used to everyone talking. “Well? What do you think of him?” she asked the group of women in the kitchen.

One of the other waitresses, Lucia, didn’t hesitate to jump in and address the elephant in the room. She stared at Lola’s bump with eyes wider than her head. “Oh my! You’re carrying high, Lola…” She put her hand on Lola’s stomach. If it were anyone else it would have startled Lola, but she’d kind of gotten used to the Cantina gals having no sense of personal space or boundaries. “It’s definitely going to be a girl.”

“You’re not still dyeing your hair, right?” Belinda cut in sternly, nearly swatting Lucia’s hand out of her way. “You don’t want the chemicals messing the baby.”

Lola just stood there for a second, overwhelmed by all the questions and suggestions, but also confused. “Why isn’t anybody like… freaking out at me over this?”

“Well, we  _ were  _ quite shocked,” Lucia said. “When your dad called that meeting and told us… why, he was  _ so  _ upset, Mija! Understandably. But we talked him down.”

Lola moved away from the girls suddenly. “Wait- my dad called a  _ meeting _ ?” She hadn’t expected him to keep completely quiet about this, but like,  _ announcing  _ it? Lola was kind of mortified. It felt like that time he’d stumbled upon her diary and read the first three pages. Except this was a million times worse. Lola was starting to feel okay with people knowing, but she’d wanted to tell everyone on her own terms. Or at least, not through her  _ dad _ .

“Sí,” Belinda nodded. “He just… he needed advice, Mija. He thought it was his fault, you not having your mom around…”

Lucia offered Lola a weak smile, clearly picking up on the tension. “At least your mother knows now…”

Lola froze, Lucia’s words just ringing in her ears like static noise. She couldn’t have possibly heard that right. Lola hadn’t spoken to her mom since their last phone call weeks ago, and she  _ definitely  _ hadn’t mentioned the pregnancy to her. She hadn’t even considered how she was going to tell her mom, who she barely even saw outside of FaceRange. It wasn’t that her mom didn’t care, per say… it was just, she wasn’t physically  _ around  _ enough to. Lola knew her parents’ split had been hardest on her mom, that her leaving town hadn’t been an easy decision for any of them. But that didn’t give her the right to just decide to be a full-time parent again. The only way she’d know about the pregnancy was if Lola’s father had…

“Hey, Lo? Mind giving me a hand outside?” Miles’ voice called out before Lola could even think of anything else to add. She had never been so thankful for his timing.

“Coming…” she called back. She reached into the bag of tortilla chips and grabbed a handful on her way out. If there was one perk of pregnancy, it was that she could get away with stress eating.

Lola exited the Cantina and headed toward the outdoor tables. As she walked she suddenly got a flashback to the time that Miles and Esme were wasted off their asses sitting outside antagonizing Tiny. Oh, to go back to when Lola thought that was the dramatic peak of her life. She was so glad to see how Miles had grown since that unfortunate time period. Even Esme had grown a considerable amount since then. Her eyes fell on an impatient looking older couple. Clearly this was the table Miles was asking for assistance with. 

“Is that our chips and salsa?” A shrill voice called out. Lola was only a few feet away but the customer was speaking as if she was a football field away. 

Lola kept her tone polite. “Yes, ma’am.” No need in making already obnoxious customers even more irritated. “Sorry if we made you wait. I’d be glad to offer you guys an order of empanadas free of charge for the inconvenience.” 

“We’ll take that as soon as possible, thank you.” One of the customers, an older woman with hay-yellow bleached hair said. Not a single hint of thankfulness in her voice. Lola wasn’t a fan of customers like this. She dropped the chips and salsa on the table and stepped away without much more than a simple smile and nod offered to the customers. As soon as Lola was out of earshot she heard the customer add another comment. “I bet this girl will expect an extra tip.” 

That comment caused Lola to be immediately self-conscious. A customer had never said anything like that before. Was it because she was visibly pregnant? She knew that strangers were going to make assumptions once she started showing but she didn’t expect it to happen this soon. She tried to tell herself she was jumping to conclusions, but before she went back into the restaurant she heard more stinging words. 

“I don’t want to give my money to a girl like _ that. _ If she’s pregnant that young who knows what other trouble she’s getting herself into? I’m not putting my money toward  _ that _ .” 

Lola rushed back into the Cantina with tears welling up in her eyes. Customers had been known to be callous assholes but she’d never had one judge her so harshly, especially over something she couldn’t control. Usually customers would get mad over stuff like their plate being too hot or too cold. Nothing like what had officially begun trickling in since her secret became overtly obvious. 

“Lo… you good?” A familiar face and voice collided with Lola. Shay was walking through the Cantina toward an outdoor seat along with Tiny and Zig. “You look upset.” 

Lola reached up and wiped the beginnings of tears from her eyes.  _ Look strong, Lola _ . “Oh, yeah, I’m great. Just a complicated order. This business man was really harsh because he said ‘no pickles, extra tomatoes’ and I accidentally gave him extra pickles and no tomatoes.” She made up an excuse on the spot. There was no business man or pickles or tomatoes. She just didn’t want to talk about what was making her cry. 

“We’re sitting outside, hope we get you as our server.” Shay tried to lift Lola’s spirits. “Zig is third-wheeling because Esme ditched him for Frankie. Do you know what’s up with that?” 

Zig and Tiny had gone and taken their seats, not concerned with Lola and Shay’s girl talk. 

“Uh, I dunno… They’re friends now?” Lola shrugged. She didn’t know the full details of Frankie and Esme’s budding friendship nor did she really feel like discussing the little that she did know when she had a table of nagging customers already chomping at the bit for their free empanadas. 

Shay didn’t seem fully satisfied with that answer. “Is it a good idea for Frankie to get close to...her?” Shay had always had her issues with Esme, mostly for good reason. 

“I really don’t have time for this, Shay.” Lola pushed past her friend. She’d deal with that later. She walked over to Miles, feeling Zig and Tiny’s eyeballs falling on her nearby. She was sure  _ they’d  _ have opinions to say too. “Could you deal with the new table outside?” Lola sighed to her boyfriend, her eyes still kind of watery. “Familiar faces. I just...can’t today.” 

Miles nodded, immediately understanding. Lola appreciated that she didn’t have to explain what she was feeling, that he just understood without having to ask questions. “Sure, I got you.” He leaned down and wiped a tear from Lola’s cheek, then quickly planted a light kiss on her lips, which caused Tiny’s eyes to widen. Whether or not a kiss was against health code violations, or what her father would call “unprofessional,” Lola didn’t really care. She just loved having Miles nearby. He had a magical way of melting her stress away every time.

…

Frankie shifted in her seat as she waited for Esme to return from the bathroom. If someone had told her two months ago that she would be hanging out one-on-one with Esme Song, she would’ve called them crazy. But surprisingly, Esme understood her far more than most people she had met. Sure, she was unconventional, but she was actually pretty genuine. 

Esme returned to the table and held a hand out for Frankie to hold. “It’s too cold in here. I wanna eat outside.” 

“Okay?” Frankie didn’t mind sitting outside. She grabbed Esme’s hand and stood up, taking a menu and the water that she had ordered. 

The two girls headed toward the outdoor area of the Cantina. Frankie’s eyes immediately fell on Zig, Shay and Tiny all seated together. 

“Did you know they were here?” Frankie asked. 

“I… _ may _ have seen Ziggy walking in when I was headed toward the bathroom.” Esme admitted. “Look, I just like to keep an eye on him. We don’t have to talk to him.” 

Frankie rolled her eyes slightly. She didn’t dislike Zig, but she really didn’t want to spend her whole night obsessing over Esme’s boyfriend. “Alright, fine. At least it’s nice outside.” She set her cup of water down and sat down across from Esme, readjusting to their new setting. 

Miles emerged from the Cantina looking as if he was making a beeline toward the table with Shay, Tiny and Zig. When his eyes fell on Frankie and Esme, however, he paused and redirected his path. “What are you doing here?” he asked Frankie, his tone sharp. 

“That’s no way to take an order.” Esme chimed in. “Guacamole, please. A whole bucket. And _ tons  _ of chips.” 

Miles nodded slowly, seeming to not fully process the fact that Frankie was hanging out with Esme. With all of the Lola drama, he probably hadn’t even noticed the blossoming friendship between his ex-flame and his younger sister. “Anything else…?” he questioned slowly, not even bothering to remove the order pad from his pocket. 

“That’s it for now, big bro.” Frankie smiled. Something about making her brother slightly uncomfortable due to her choice in company made her feel weirdly good. Maybe it was having to witness her brother and best friend falling for one another that made things so oddly satisfying, like a weird version of cosmic justice. 

Miles wandered away from Frankie and Esme’s table and toward the other table of Degrassians. The other table was just close enough that Frankie could hear what they were saying if she listened closely. 

“Hey guys, can I take your order?” Miles asked. Frankie watched as Zig and Tiny immediately exchanged glances. It was no secret they weren’t exactly fond of her older brother.

“I thought Lola was supposed to be our waitress...” Shay said. 

“Was dealing with a difficult table,” Miles said, nodding his head slightly toward a table of older customers who looked impatient and annoyed. One woman was impatiently tapping her fingers on an empty water glass while the other was glued to her phone. “I’ll be your waiter for now. She’ll swing by when she’s less occupied.” 

“Yeah, she looked  _ pretty _ upset when we first came in…” Zig spoke up. He sort of sounded like he was probing and slightly antagonizing Miles. It’d be far from the first time that Frankie’s brother got involved in some sort of misunderstanding involving him. Zig was cute but a bit of a meathead in Frankie’s opinion. Frankie definitely felt like Esme deserved better than him, but Esme was completely invested and obsessed for  _ some _ reason. 

Esme’s voice took Frankie’s attention away from the other table. “Did you hear me?” she asked. Frankie really hadn’t. 

“No, sorry. I was just watching…” Frankie motioned toward the table with their peers. 

“They’re boring.” Esme stated. “Help me figure out what I wanna order. I’m thinking I might get veggie fajitas. I just love that  _ rush _ when the waiter walks past everyone else with my loud sizzling plate and everyone just watches in awe like it's my birthday…” A giant smile had appeared on Esme’s face. “Plus if Miles is our server I want the slight chance that he might fumble the fajitas and make a giant mess, or maybe when he tells me that the plate is hot and not to touch it I could touch it and sue him!” 

“You’re truly an evil genius.” Frankie teased. “Get the fajitas. I’ll just warn Miles to be extra careful.” 

Esme continued to inspect the menu, giving Frankie a chance to check back in on Miles. Frankie didn’t know if it was because she was sitting with Esme, he was serving his girlfriend’s ex, or simply because his girlfriend was pregnant and everything was stressful constantly nowadays, but her brother seemed pretty on the edge.

“Lola’s fine, she was just stressed about an order,” Miles said, more agitation slipping through his words now. “Nothing to concern yourself with.”

“It seemed more like  _ you _ were stressing her out,” Tiny shot back, and Frankie swore she felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up. Where was this even coming from? Frankie wondered. Sure, Lola and Tiny were friends, but this really wasn’t his place anymore.

Shay seemed to be similarly uncomfortable. “Tiny…” she started.

“Hey, I’m not trying to start anything...” Tiny’s voice was already slightly raised. Sure sounded like he was starting something. What had Frankie missed in the two minutes that she had diverted her attention to her dinner partner? “I’ve just been hearing some rumors that I  _ really _ don’t like.” 

“What are you talking about?” Shay turned to Tiny, seeming thrown off by whatever rising conflict was happening. 

Frankie assessed the situation and came to a pretty quick conclusion. “Esme, I think Tiny found out about Miles and Lola…”

Esme immediately looked up from her menu. “He and Zig have been speculating for the past week…” She revealed info that would have been nice to know as soon as it happened.

“This is something that would’ve been nice to know!” Frankie exclaimed. 

“I’ve been throwing them off Lola’s trail, I swear,” Esme said. 

Miles attempted to de-escalate before things got too heated. “Look, can we talk about this another time? The last thing Lola needs is more drama.” 

“You  _ are _ drama, dude. You think I don’t remember like a year ago when you were strung out sending my girl junk pics?” Tiny was clearly fine with escalating things. 

“ _ Your girl? _ ” Shay interjected. 

“My  _ ex _ -girl.” He clarified. “That’s not what this is about.” Tiny tried to backtrack and reassure his girlfriend. 

Frankie was about two seconds from stepping in. She sort of understood where Tiny was coming from but now was neither the place or the time. 

Miles looked like he was doing everything he could to avoid erupting. He’d held it together long enough, but Frankie could tell he was breaking. “What’s your problem?”

“Should I…?” Frankie asked Esme if she should jump in. 

Esme shook her head. “Tiny’s all bark, no bite. Like a big ol’ chihuahua. This’ll be over before we know it.” 

“My problem is you making Lola cry,” Tiny said sharply, suddenly rising from his chair. Huh? Frankie was confused. Had she missed something? 

Miles nearly laughed. “Are you dense? That’s not what happened. I told you, she was stressed about a table.” He stepped towards Tiny, getting awfully close. “Now, do everyone a favor and focus on your own girl. It’s not my fault you had your chance with Lola and blew it.”

“Stay out of my face,” Tiny warned. Frankie wasn’t sure she had ever seen Tiny this upset. His disposition was usually on a spectrum from chill to absolutely sunny. He was definitely protective over the people he loved, but his direct confrontation of Miles surprised Frankie. “You hop from person to person… Maya, Zoe, Tristan… Zoe again, Esme…” 

“Ooh, that’s me!” Esme raised her hand slightly. 

Zig’s eyes fell on his girlfriend, not seeming to appreciate her interjection. He turned to Tiny and encouraged his friend to continue. 

“Back to Tristan, and then when he’s in a coma you sweep Lola up and use her...” 

Frankie watched closely, hoping she could trust her brother to handle this well. “Could you go grab Lola?” Frankie asked Esme. She’d do it herself but she was afraid to take her eyes off this car crash. 

“Sure.” Esme reached over and grabbed Frankie’s empty water cup. “Gonna snag a refill while I’m at it.” She disappeared into the Cantina to search for Lola. Hopefully this situation would be diffused before Lola had to step in. 

“Nobody used anyone. I care about Lola and this baby more than anything.” Miles defended himself. 

Zig’s eyes widened. “Oh shit! Guess we were right. Moneybags can’t stop destroying everything he touches, huh?”

“So you really knocked her up?” Tiny seemed a bit shocked. It seemed like he assumed the rumors were true, but he was still surprised to have it so plainly confirmed. Especially since Frankie knew for a fact that Lola and Tiny hadn’t done anything more than swap tongues that whole time they were together. She imagined it had to be kind of a shock to hear your ex was having a kid with someone else, even if you didn’t have romantic feelings for them anymore. “I can’t believe you’d do this to her.” 

“I didn’t  _ do _ anything to her.” Miles said defensively. “We fucked up and we’re just trying to handle it in the most responsible way we can. Okay? It’s none of your business.”

“The most responsible thing you could’ve done would be to stay the hell away from Lola. You’ve messed her whole life up before it’s even gotten a chance to start.” Tiny stepped closer to Miles. The heat was definitely getting turned up. Frankie observed the tables around them. A young couple had stopped playing with the baby in a high chair in front of them because they had taken notice of the unfolding drama. The table of older customers had also stopped their conversation and were plainly staring. 

Frankie looked quickly to see if there was any sign of Esme or Lola. Not yet.  _ Come on, guys…  _ She was starting to feel helpless just sitting on the sidelines watching. She didn’t want to jump in and cause even more problems, but the longer she let this drama heat up, the more chance it’d boil over and make a giant mess. She made eye contact with Shay, who seemed to be just as nervous.

“Alright, Tiny… take it down a notch.” Shay finally spoke up. “You’re not the guy who gets in stupid fights anymore.” 

Frankie had only heard bits and pieces of Tiny’s past but she knew it was rough. He’d grown up in a harsh neighborhood with a single mom and been dealt some pretty crappy cards. Same with Zig. They’d definitely come a long way from whatever had landed them in the Rubber Room. 

“This isn’t a stupid fight. Lola is  _ sixteen. _ ” Tiny said. “She’s too young for all of this. She’s too young to have her life ruined by some jerk who will probably just get his rich daddy to throw money at the problem and dip off to some private college the minute things get hard.” 

That was it. That was what finally set Miles off. Frankie knew as soon as she heard the mention of their father that things were going to get ugly. She opened her mouth to finally say something, but her brother beat her to it before she could. “What do you care, anyway?!” Miles snapped, finally succumbing to his anger. Every table was staring at them now. “ _ You  _ were the one who broke her heart! I was just there to pick up the pieces. Now you suddenly get to decide who’s not good enough for her?”

“It wasn’t like that,” Tiny said. “This has nothing to do with…”

“Just admit you’re mad that I got further with her in one night than you did in eight months,” Miles said. 

That was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Before Miles could open his mouth to say another word, Tiny’s fist collided with Miles’ jaw. 

  
  



	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The conflict at Lola's Cantina continues.

“ _ Miles… _ !” Frankie looked around for help frantically. Everyone around was frozen, totally in shock by the fact that a punch was thrown, even Zig. Where in the hell was Esme or Lola right now? 

Miles snapped out of the little trance of initial shock, holding his stinging cheek. “Back off,” he growled at Tiny, getting in his face and causing him to back up. Miles grabbed his arm. “Back the fuck off or…”

_ “Back down, big brother…” _ Frankie said, but it came at a volume that only she could hear. 

“Let go of me,” Tiny said.

“Just stop!” Shay yelled out. Zig started to stand up, presumably to back Tiny up, but Esme shot him a  _ don’t you dare  _ look and he quickly sat back down.

Tiny pulled his arm back, trying to release his fist from Miles’ grip. Miles refused to let go. He was gripping Tiny’s arm so strongly Frankie was afraid he would snap it in half. “Let go!” Tiny said more forcefully, jerking around and trying to regain control of his hand. 

“Are you gonna back off?” Miles held Tiny’s hand hostage. He was surprisingly strong for such a lanky guy. 

Before answering, Tiny managed to wiggle his hand free from Miles’ grip and swing again. This time his fist connected with Miles’ cheek. 

“Tiny!” Lola’s voice suddenly squeaked from the entrance of the outdoor area. “Get off of him!” 

Of course Lola showed up  _ after  _ punches were thrown. Why had it taken Esme so freaking long to find Lola? The Cantina wasn’t ginormous. 

Miles shoved Tiny, so hard he almost fell to the concrete. Tiny pushed him back with equal force. It seemed like nothing would stop them at this point. Except...

Lola ran up on the altercation immediately placing herself in the middle. “Stop right now!” she nearly screamed. 

Frankie felt for her best friend. She was going through enough without having to break up physical fights at her place of work between her ex and her baby’s father. Lola’s presence was finally enough for her to stand up and rush over as well. Frankie grabbed her brother’s shoulders and pulled him away from Tiny. If only she had stepped in sooner, maybe this whole mess could’ve been avoided. 

…

As soon as Esme found Lola in the Cantina and gave her the lowdown on what was happening outside between Miles and Tiny, she immediately rushed over. She was too late, as it turned out.

Lola watched in shock for a moment as Miles grabbed Tiny’s fist tightly and refused to let go. Tiny wiggled free from Miles’ grip and landed a punch on his cheek and Lola cried out.

“Tiny!” She called out. She didn’t know the full context of what had happened but from what Esme had shared, it seemed like Tiny had thrown the first punch. Whether or not his concern came from a good place or if Miles had antagonized him back, there was no world in which the two of them fighting at her family’s Cantina like this was acceptable. “Get off of him!” 

As if they didn’t hear Lola, the two boys continued fighting. Miles pushed Tiny and Tiny shoved him back, both boys too heated to back down at this point. Apparently she was going to have to physically place herself in the middle of this fight to get it to end. Not only were these idiots destroying the Cantina, they were also putting her  _ and  _ the baby at risk too. What a  _ great _ way to prove how responsible she and Miles were. “Stop right now!” she yelled at the top of her lungs, charging in between them. 

If everyone at the Cantina wasn’t watching already, they sure as hell were now. Both boys put their fists down and backed off of each other. It had worked for Bella with Edward and Jacob, and apparently it had worked for Lola too. As long as that didn’t make their baby Renesmee.

Frankie pulled Miles to the side and placed him in a nearby chair, examining his injuries quickly while Lola charged up to Tiny. 

“I’m not some damsel in distress who needs my ex-boyfriend to beat someone up for me! Not anymore. Especially not when it’s my  _ boyfriend _ !” Lola said right to Tiny’s face. “I can’t believe you would come here and cause trouble like this-” She turned and looked at Miles. “ _ Both  _ of you!” Lola felt like her emotions and hormones were going completely haywire. She couldn’t even think straight, let alone calm down enough to measure her words.

“He was just trying to…” Zig tried to defend Tiny but Lola quickly held a hand up in front of his face. 

“Don’t even try it, Zig.” Lola was so angry right now. There was no excuse or explanation that Zig or anyone else could give that could make what she had just witnessed okay. Tiny had gotten into a fight for her before and had apparently completely forgotten how horribly that turned out. She wasn’t the girl who needed anyone to defend her honor anymore. She was sick of of everyone treating her like she was some stupid little girl who couldn’t make her own decisions. “I would never want anyone to  _ fight _ over me, especially not like this! Especially not here! Are you guys completely out of your minds?” Lola had lost control of everything, including her volume. 

Esme started a slow clap. Lola and Frankie both shot her a look, and she went back to eating her chips. Lola looked around at the crowd of customers who had gathered to watch the altercation. Great. It was only a matter of time before…

“ _ What _ is going on here, Lola?” Lautaro, the Cantina’s assistant manager emerged from the crowd. “First I get complaints that the serving staff outside isn’t doing their jobs, now a  _ fight? _ Esto es inaceptable!” 

Lola turned to Lautaro, now feeling her heart beating like a hummingbird’s wings.  _ At least it wasn’t her father. _ He was away from the Cantina for the day for some meeting. “Lo siento mucho, Lautaro. I… I can explain.” 

“Explain it to your father. You and your little boyfriend need to take your aprons off right now and clock out. Your dad will make the final call with disciplinary actions.” Lautaro said firmly. “And you two…” Lautaro pointed to Tiny and Zig. “Leave right now.” 

Lola hung her head and unwrapped the apron from around her waist. She walked over to Miles and helped him up from the seat he was recuperating in. A part of her wanted to immediately make sure he was okay and the other part wanted to yell at him for participating in the fight and making an ass of himself,  _ especially  _ at her family’s restaurant like this. To say this wasn’t the first impression she’d wanted her boyfriend to make on everyone was a massive understatement. 

“I’m sorry, everyone,” she apologized to the customers in the immediate area before her eyes fell on Tiny and Zig. “Almost everyone.” She didn’t really care at this point if Tiny and Zig were mad at her. They had caused a gigantic mess with absolutely no regard for Lola or the safety of her baby. She  _ really _ didn’t want to see their faces right now. “You guys heard Lautaro. Get going.” 

Both Tiny and Zig exited the Cantina looking rightfully embarrassed. Lautaro disappeared to go fix the customer complaints that had racked up while the altercation was taking place. 

Shay walked up to Lola as soon as they were out of earshot. “Are you okay? I had no idea Tiny would do that.” Shay started, resting her hand on Lola’s shoulder with concern.

“Well, he did,” Miles responded to Shay, his hand shakily gripping the cheek that Tiny had punched. “What the  _ hell?  _ This hurts so bad.” 

“I’ll go look for some ice,” Frankie volunteered, probably just eager to get away from the situation. Esme followed her. Lola was surprised Esme was even still here— she’d assumed she would have followed her boyfriend, not Frankie.

Lola gently rubbed her hand against her boyfriend’s cheek. She wasn’t at all happy with Miles for fighting back, but from what she could tell, he hadn’t thrown the first punch. “I can’t believe Tiny would just hit you out of nowhere like this…”

Shay spoke up quietly. “Um, well… it wasn’t exactly out of  _ nowhere _ …”

Lola turned her attention to Shay. “Are you really defending him?!” 

“No, I’m just saying… Miles  _ did  _ kind of provoke him…”

“Whose side are you on?” Lola snapped. She kind of understood Shay wanting to stand by her man, and she would definitely be chewing Miles out for his part in this later, but it was hard for Lola to think through this calmly right now when her boyfriend’s face was swelling up and her hormones were going haywire.

“I’m not!” Shay said defensively. “You think I liked seeing my boyfriend fight over another girl? Yeah, I’m having a real blast, Lo.”

Lola had enough. “You know what? You can go too.” She knew she was being kind of petty and would probably regret this later, but she was cranky, hormonal, and exhausted. The last thing she needed was to rehash all the drama between her and Shay and Tiny that had led her to connect with Miles in the first place. 

Shay just shook her head at Lola. “Fine. If that’s what you want.” She turned to leave the Cantina, chasing after Tiny and Zig.

Lola was sure she hadn’t heard the end of this from anyone. Right now, though, she just wanted to focus on making sure Miles’ face didn’t totally swell up. The spot on his jaw was already starting to bruise. Dammit, where were Frankie and Esme with that ice?

“Follow me.” Lola said, grabbing Miles’ hand and guiding him toward the kitchen. “Let’s get something cold on your face.” 

....

Miles sat on top of one of the counters in the very back of the kitchen, Lola pressing a pack of frozen strawberries to his cheek. “This was all I could find,” she muttered, stress seething through her voice. “You’d think a cantina would have more first aid stuff…”

“I’ll be fine,” Miles said. “I’ve had worse done to my pretty face… by Zig, no less.”

Frankie and Esme stumbled into the kitchen. “Sorry,” Frankie said. “We got distracted by a couple of waitresses demanding every detail of the idiots fighting outside.”

“ _ Hey _ .” Miles glared at his sister.

“The waitress’ words, not ours,” Esme clarified. “I would have said cretins. Maybe goons.”

“Alright, enough,” Lola said, pressing the frozen strawberries harder. She turned her full attention on her boyfriend. “So what  _ happened  _ out there? I need to get this story straight for my dad before he bans you from the Cantina…” She reached her other hand into a bag of tortilla chips and furiously munched down a handful. “If you messed up any of the pots and plants, you’re paying for them! My dad takes his begonias  _ very  _ seriously.”

“You saw what happened,” Miles said, still wincing from the sting of his injuries. “Tiny figured out I got you pregnant, and he lost his shit.”

Something didn’t quite add up to Lola, though. She hadn’t exactly expected Tiny to react positively to her and Miles having a baby, but he wasn’t the type of guy who just started fights for no reason. “So he just… punched you? Out of nowhere?”

“Yeah. Basically…” Miles muttered. He lifted the frozen pack from his cheek. “Do you have anything else? I can feel strawberry juice on my cheeks.”

Frankie made a face. “I think that’s just blood…”

Lola wasn’t quite done. “What do you mean ‘basically?’”

Esme cleared her throat, having been awfully quiet until now. “He means  _ basically _ Tiny decked him after he bragged about swiping your v-card.”

Frankie butted in. “Uh, that’s… not  _ quite  _ what-”

“You did  _ what _ ?!” Lola exclaimed at Miles, speaking right over Frankie. 

“Oh look, time to go!” Frankie said, pulling Esme toward the exit before her or Miles could get in another word. “Lo, I’ll… call you later.” She practically dragged Esme out the door with her.

Now it was just Lola alone with Miles. She threw the frozen pack of berries back in his lap, suddenly a little less concerned with making him feel better. “Well?!” she crossed her arms at him, waiting for an explanation.

Miles sighed and pressed the berries back on his cheek. “Tiny was egging me on. He thought I made you cry, and he kept saying that I was just trouble for you. And then he said I would just get my dad to throw money at you and bail once I got bored. And I snapped and made a stupid joke about how I got further with you in one night than he did the whole time you guys dated…” He slowly dared to make eye contact with Lola. “I’m really sorry, Lo. I was being an idiot.”

Lola grabbed another handful of tortilla chips and flicked one at Miles. “Well, you're not wrong about  _ that _ part.” She had calmed down a little bit from the hormonal mess she’d been a few minutes ago, but she was still  _ pissed off.  _ Maybe Tiny had started the fight, but she was also annoyed with her boyfriend for his part in this embarrassing fiasco. Especially after she’d just stuck her neck out for him with Shay— ugh, now she was going to have to apologize to her too, right? This whole mess could have been avoided if Miles had just  _ walked away.  _ But, even so… she had to admit she found it hard to stay legitimately  _ angry  _ at Miles. They all had their breaking points, and she guessed the remark about his dad’s money had been Miles’, and whatever Miles said back was Tiny’s. It didn’t excuse the fighting, but still. 

Miles nodded. “Are you mad at me?”

“Yes.” Lola grabbed the frozen berries out of Miles’ hands and went back to pressing it for him. “Look, you can’t go around getting into stupid fights like this, okay?!” she raised her voice, although it was more like she was just yelling in general than yelling  _ at  _ him. Today was just… high emotions, in every possible way. Being here with Miles, seeing him get hurt, it just brought out a million feelings in her. “We’re supposed to be proving we’re responsible enough to take care of our  _ baby _ , not trashing my family’s Cantina. And… I don’t want anything to happen to you. Because…” She took a deep breath and gently brushed her other hand against his swollen, strawberry-stained cheek. Her words were coming out faster than she could think at this point. “Because I think I’m in love with you.”

It went quiet between them, and Lola almost completely regretted that clumsy monologue she’d just delivered out of nowhere. Crazy circumstances aside, they’d really only been seeing each other officially for a few weeks. But she’d never felt so certain about anything, about anyone before. Knowing she could be so angry with someone and yet so infatuated with him at the same time… it was crazy what this boy made her feel. Miles slowly formed a smile across his face. “You love me?” he said, a little cocky, like he was almost teasing her.

Lola felt her cheeks go all rosy. Miles making her spell it out like this was somehow both irritating and totally endearing. “It doesn’t mean I’m not still mad at you…”

Miles gently reached for her hand and pulled her into his lap. “Well, it’s a good thing you’re not giving up on me, because I  _ am _ sorry. Really sorry. And I’m going to make it up to you. And because… I think I’m in love with you too,” he said, a trace of a crooked smile still on his face. 

He leaned in and kissed her, and suddenly Lola felt her stress and anger melt away. His touch made her feel like she was finally right at home, in the arms of the person who’d been right for her all along, no matter how messy the journey along the way had been.

“Lola! Haven’t you clocked out yet? Ándale!”

The moment was short lived, with Lautaro storming in just then, rightfully irritated. But despite everything, despite the giant mess they’d made at the Cantina and the mess they’d made of their lives...somehow, something in Lola felt like it was going to be okay. She had one long night ahead of her with her father, and she’d probably be making apology phone calls for a week, but Miles’ words felt like enough to carry her through it. 

“Lo siento, Lautaro…!” she hollered out, then gently kissed Miles’ cheek before turning away.  Miles was somehow  _ always _ enough to get her through.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola deals with her father in the aftermath of the Cantina fiasco. Miles confronts Frankie about her newfound friendship with Esme.

Lola’s fingers nervously gripped the handle of her home’s front door. She was not looking forward to whatever her father’s reaction to the whole Cantina debacle would be. He wasn’t an angry man, but possibly costing his restaurant business or risking its reputation was something he didn’t really mess around with. Last week Lola was telling him she was pregnant, this week fights were erupting in her honor… at this point, she just wanted to be invisible until her due date.

“Lola, is that you?” Her father’s voice called from the kitchen the moment Lola stepped inside. 

“Yes?” She responded hesitantly. She couldn’t quite figure out if that was anger in his voice or just stress. Maybe Lautaro hadn’t called him yet? She wandered toward the kitchen slowly. 

“So… we need to talk. About a few things...” Lola’s father spoke as soon as Lola entered the kitchen. His voice was even, but she could definitely tell he’d been taking his frustration out on whatever project this was that he was tinkering with on the kitchen table. There was a huge mess of broken down cardboard boxes and other things lying around. “First, how about you explain to me why Lautaro called me and said there was a  _ fight  _ at my Cantina today?”

Lola’s breath caught in her throat. So much for pinning her hopes on Lautaro. She made a beeline for the fridge and opened it. “Uh...” she started. Her eyes scanned the contents of the refrigerator nervously. Even though she had snacked on chips at the Cantina and trail mix in Miles’ car on the way home, she was still  _ hungry. _ At this point, she wasn’t sure if her bump was all baby or part-snack.

“Dime más?” Her father prodded for more information. His hands were still busy messing with whatever he had made such a gigantic mess with. Knowing Lola’s father it could be anything. He had a bit of an online shopping addiction and tended to order random little things that he thought could improve the house or the Cantina. 

“Just… one sec…” She knew it was in her best interest to start groveling immediately, but before she could even attempt this conversation, Lola seriously needed to satisfy this craving. She reached into the fridge and decided on a snack - a big bowl of strawberries. She couldn’t help but think of the frozen fruit she held to Miles’ bruised face only a couple hours earlier… this wasn’t gonna be easy to explain. Now was as good a time as any to start trying, though… 

“So, you remember that boy I was dating before Miles?” Lola asked her father.

“Mhmm, Mr. Tiny?” Lola’s father muttered, grinding that poor wrench awfully hard as if his tools were responsible for the fight. He’d always had a soft spot for Tiny, though. “And how is he doing?” 

Lola sprinkled some sugar on top of the freshly washed strawberries that she had placed in front of herself. “Uh, not so good, I guess…” She popped a sugared strawberry in her mouth. It tasted  _ so good.  _ For a moment she almost forgot what she was doing. “He came into the Cantina today with some friends and they started some trouble with Miles.” 

“What about?” Her father asked, as if he couldn’t make a wild guess. He was really going to make her spell it all out. 

Lola hesitated for a moment. “Tiny and a friend of his had been hearing rumors about me. Rumors about…” She placed her hand on her stomach. “Me, Miles and… the baby.” She still struggled to look at her father as she mentioned her baby. Lola had been very slowly growing past the shame about being pregnant, but the disappointment in her father’s face when the news broke still made her heart ache. She hated feeling like she wasn’t living up to what her father expected of her anymore. It was out of her control at this point, just like so many other things, but it didn’t sting any less. “I guess Miles was trying to diffuse the situation, but Tiny was trying to defend my honor…” 

“Mija, no matter what they were saying, it doesn’t justify your boyfriend getting violent at my restaurant. I can’t have him representing our family in this way. Especially with a baby on the way.” Her father acknowledged the baby with the most casual tone he had used about the situation yet. It  _ almost _ sounded like he was coming to terms with things. Almost. “If this boy is going to be the father of your baby, he needs to learn how to handle stressful situations without putting you or the baby in danger.” 

“He already is the father of my baby. It’s not an  _ if. _ ” Lola corrected. “But you’re right. That’s basically what I told him…” 

Lola’s father kept working with his hands as he talked. “If you’re trying to prove you’re responsible, this is not the way to do it. You think I don’t remember that Miles is the same boy who came causing trouble at our Cantina a while back with that other girl? I want to trust your judgment Mija, but you’re making it difficult.”

Lola shoved a handful of strawberries in her mouth to stop herself from talking back. She understood her father’s anger and he wasn’t wrong, but she just sort of felt like he was talking to her like a child. He was usually pretty good about not doing that. 

“I promise, Dad. It was a one-time thing. Tiny swung first. Miles was just...” Lola finally said. 

“I don’t care who started it. I want you both to apologize to Lautaro and the rest of the staff,” Lola’s father said sternly, though there was a little less anger in his voice now. “I’m taking your word for it that this was a one-time mistake, but if your boyfriend ever does anything like this again, I won’t allow him at the Cantina. My place of business is not you and your friends’ playground. Understood?”

Lola nodded sadly. She still didn’t think her dad was being entirely fair about Miles or willing to listen to the full story, but she supposed his reaction could have been a lot worse, especially given the amount of stress she’d placed on him lately. “Okay, Dad. I’m sorry.”

Her father barely looked up from his tools. “Now, then… I have something else I need to discuss with you. You know how I had an important meeting today?”

“Is everything okay with the Cantina?” Lola asked nervously, shoveling the last few strawberries into her mouth. Maybe she could get Miles to bake her a strawberry pie sometime…

“Sí. The thing is, the meeting wasn’t about the Cantina at all. It was… with your mother.”

Lola nearly choked on the strawberries. She’d been so distracted by the fight that she’d completely forgotten about the conversation she’d had with the waitresses a couple of hours ago. Her parents were on fine terms as co-parents, but that didn’t mean their divorce had been smooth sailing or not totally traumatic for Lola as a kid. And they definitely wouldn’t meet up unless it was specifically to discuss something pertaining to Lola. “Uh. Excuse me?!”

“Let me finish,” Lola’s father said sharply. “I know you may not be happy with me for meeting up with her without telling you, but your mother has a right to know about your…  _ situation _ .” 

“Fine, maybe. But why didn’t you let me tell her myself?” Lola said, crossing her arms. It wasn’t a great look for her to be pouting over this, but she felt she had a right to feel a little betrayed. Even if she hadn’t planned on telling her mom until Christmas. Maybe Easter.

“And when were you planning on doing that? Look Mija, even if you think you’re grown up enough to handle this, you’re still a child. And I have a responsibility as your parent to take care of you and keep your mother in the loop…” He shook his head and continued to busy his hands with whatever this project was. “As you’ll soon learn, parenthood is no  _ caminar en el parque _ .”

“Yeah, well…” Lola muttered, glancing down at her growing bump. She didn’t know how to respond to that. “What did Mom have to say?” She was talking like she didn’t care, but she actually was pretty afraid to hear her mother’s reaction. Whether her mom lived with them or not, she was still her mom. 

Her father finally set his tools down for a minute. “Well, she was in denial at first. She cried a little, wanted to know what we were planning on doing. I told her you and I were discussing everything.”

Lola’s heart hurt a little picturing this whole conversation. No matter how many times her father had brought up adoption, she was still adamant that she and Miles were keeping the baby, and him reciprocating her “I love you” today had only made her more sure of that decision. But they obviously hadn’t exactly succeeded in proving their responsibility for this. “Was Mom mad at me?” she asked her father, her eyes growing sort of teary again.

“I think she was more angry with me. And herself,” her father said. “She thinks she hasn’t been around enough.”  _ Well, she’s not wrong _ , Lola thought to herself. “She wants to see you soon.”

Meeting up with her mother while she was pregnant and hormonal and feeling gross was about the last thing Lola wanted to do. But also, she knew she didn’t really have a choice in the matter. “Okay,” she shrugged, knowing full well she was going to cry into her pillow about this later.

“Also…” her father reached into a bag behind him. She hadn’t even noticed it. “Your mother found this in her closet.” 

Lola gasped as her father pulled out an old stuffed bear. It was worn in every single way, but you could tell it was well loved. It was Lola’s favorite toy as a little kid. According to her father, she wouldn’t so much as go down for a nap without it. “Honey!” she reached for her stuffed friend, fondly remembering its name.

Her father’s expression softened a little. “She thought you might like to have it. Or, I guess maybe the baby would.” He stumbled a little over the word, clearly still having trouble processing that his baby was having a baby.

Lola nodded quickly, hugging the little bear. It was kind of silly how much comfort a stuffed animal could bring her, but she really needed it right now. The thought that her baby might find comfort in it too made her heart happy. She allowed her mind to wander for a second and picture all the cute little baby toys she and Miles were going to spoil him or her with. Or at least, whatever they could afford… “Thanks, Dad,” she said. She looked at whatever project he’d been working on this whole time, still puzzled by it. “What are you building?”

Her father got quiet all of a sudden. “Oh, erm…” he said. He looked almost slightly embarrassed. “I stopped by the hardware store on my way home and picked up some things to build a little mobile. I’m not sure how we’re going to afford a crib yet, but-”

Lola abruptly leaped up from her chair and hugged her dad before he could get in another word. It didn’t matter if he was going to ban Miles from the Cantina or ground her for life, she suddenly was just so grateful to have him as a parent. She could tell he still wasn’t convinced she was responsible enough to handle this and was still a bit disappointed in her, but… he was making an effort. 

Between him and Miles and her friends, Lola was actually starting to feel like she really wasn’t alone in this. That she had people who loved her and would support her no matter what kind of mess she’d gotten into. The circumstances were far from ideal, but it made her happy to know that her baby was going to be loved. 

_ That was all any of them really needed at the end of the day, right? _ she thought, her mind wandering back to Miles and their blur of an afternoon, from the fight with Tiny to the frozen strawberries.  _ To feel loved. _

....

Frankie came home that night to her mother stomping around the kitchen and putting the dishes away in a fluster. Considering this was a task she usually left for the maids, or the kids, Frankie could tell she was “off.” And Miles sitting at the table with an ice pack to his face probably had something to do with that. 

“Hi, Mom,” Frankie said cautiously. She nodded at Miles. “Brother. Nice face.”

Frankie had apparently guessed her mother’s mood correctly. “What are you doing home so late?” Mrs. Hollingsworth snapped, furiously scrubbing a pan that didn’t even look used.

“It’s only nine…” Frankie pointed out, taking a seat next to her older brother and observing the half-dozen baby catalogues mixed in with the mail spread out over the table. After their not-quite-successful Cantina outing, Esme had been persistent in her quest for chips and guac, so she and Frankie wound up getting burritos from a taco stand and eating them by the ravine. Frankie had honestly just lost track of time.

“It’s a  _ school night _ ,” Mrs. Hollingsworth said sharply. She tossed the pan aside and approached Miles with another ice pack. “Here. Let me see your face again…”

“Mom, I’m  _ fine _ ,” Miles insisted. Their mom was often completely oblivious to things going on right under her own roof, yet she always seemed to instantly snap into overprotective mother mode the second one of her children got into obvious trouble. 

Mrs. Hollingsworth just shook her head, muttering something under her breath. She picked up one of the envelopes from the pile of mail, a bill of some sort. “I need to make some phone calls,” she muttered, and excused herself to go upstairs.

It was just Frankie and Miles now. “So…” she turned to her brother. “That was a shit show today.”

“Yeah, no kidding,” Miles muttered, still nursing a purple bruise on his cheek. “I didn’t mean to get into a fight. It’s just, Tiny was saying all these things and he’s got that whole history with Lola, and… it was stupid.” He paused, then glanced pointedly at Frankie. “Hey. What were you doing at the Cantina with Esme today?”

Frankie took a deep breath. She figured her big brother would question her about her newfound friendship with Esme eventually. She didn’t know a whole lot about their messed up history other than what Esme had told her: that they’d done drugs together, had sex on more than one occasion ( _ ew _ ), and cared about each other in some capacity. Honestly, Frankie didn’t like this whole idea of sharing friends with her brother. But considering her best friend was currently carrying his seed, it didn’t look like they were going to escape their respective circles mingling anytime soon. “We’ve just been hanging out,” Frankie said, trying to play it cool. “She’s fun.”

“ _ Fun _ . Yeah, that’s a word for it…”

“I know what you think she’s like, but she’s not like that,” Frankie said, feeling the need to defend her for some reason. Maybe it was because she understood what it was like to have a reputation you couldn’t escape. “At least, not anymore. I mean, I know she can be a lot, but she’s actually really nice. I like her.”

Miles sighed, clearly unconvinced. “Look, Frankie. I just… I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to be hanging out with her.” He looked her in the eye, weirdly super serious. “Just trust me on this.”

Frankie rolled her eyes. Maybe he was coming from a well-intentioned place, but honestly, who was  _ Miles  _ to be telling her who she should and shouldn’t hang out with? “Says the guy who got my best friend pregnant,” she shot back.

“I’m just looking out for you,” Miles said, seemingly ignoring that last remark. He got up from the table and reached into the fridge, pulling out a soda. “Do whatever you want. But be careful, Frankenstein. Be really careful.” He opened the soda can, causing a fizzling sound to fill the kitchen. Then he went upstairs, leaving Frankie with nothing but a million questions and a giant pile of homework to catch up on.


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola finds a way to set the record straight about her pregnancy. Esme and Frankie make plans to go to Miles and Lola's play together.

“How was the rest of yesterday?” Yael struck up a conversation as soon as Lola entered the doorway of the vlog squad meeting room. Lola and Yael were the first to arrive at the emergency before-school meeting that Baaz had called the night before. 

Lola slowly removed her headphones and sighed. “Good morning to you too.” She said with an uncharacteristically dry tone. Yael had done nothing to deserve the snark, but it was just too early to get into the intricacies of her crappy, complicated night. Things hadn’t ended on the complete worst note, but there was definitely still some stress hanging above her head like a heavy, grey cloud. “Have you heard anything yet?” Lola asked. She had a feeling Yael had already heard some rumors. If that were the case, Lola didn’t really want to waste time catching her friend up to speed. 

“Just that Tiny and Zig got kicked out of the Cantina.” Yael admitted. People always acting like they knew less than they did was sort of starting to get under Lola’s skin. Lola knew people were talking. The least they could offer was straightforwardness. A few seconds passed and Yael spoke again. “And... there was a fight?” 

Hunter entered the room before Lola got a chance to explain further. “ _ Oh, there was a fight. _ ” He interrupted, his voice slightly sarcastic and antagonizing. 

Lola couldn’t help but roll her eyes. “You weren’t there.” She said. She was sure Frankie or Miles had filled him in, but she wasn’t really in the mood for him to act like he knew what he was talking about. 

“Neither was my mother, but it didn’t stop her from talking about it all night.” Hunter replied, not phased by Lola’s sass. 

Miles hadn’t really texted much after he dropped her off at home. Lola had told him not to bother, since she was half-expecting her father to confiscate her phone anyway. 

“Is that true? Was she mad?” Lola asked. She wasn’t shocked that news of the fight had gotten to Mrs. Hollingsworth and upset her. She was just sort of shocked Miles hadn’t mentioned anything about it yet.

“Let’s just say she wasn’t super thrilled to see Miles come home with bruises all over his face.” Hunter replied. 

Yael cut in, concerned. “Bruises? Is he okay?” 

“He’s fine.” Lola reassured quickly. “Tiny and Zig got all worked up like they always do and caused a big mess that Miles and I have to answer for now. I just wish people would stop acting like they know everything when they literally know  _ nothing _ .”

“Well, you’re not really offering much info…” Yael spoke cautiously, clearly not wanting to step on any toes. “Maybe if you set the record straight?” 

Yael had pitched the idea of Lola making a vlog about her pregnancy the day before and it had seemed like a surefire way for public embarrassment, but what happened yesterday was possibly worse. Maybe things wouldn’t have turned out so messy if Tiny had learned the details about Lola and Miles’ pregnancy through a calm and collected video of Lola rather than the vicious rumor mill. Lola considered it for a moment. If everyone basically already knew, what damage would it really do? 

Lola considered the idea for a few moments. Before speaking again, she placed herself in a chair and propped her feet up. Her toes and ankles were swelling, which was apparently another fantastic symptom of pregnancy, so she needed to relax a bit. “Do you really think it’s a good idea?” 

Yael opened their mouth to speak, but Baaz barged in with a pile of papers and an open laptop in hand, interrupting the moment completely. 

“We need to talk about the comments.” Baaz said, looking immediately to Lola and squinting at her stretched out legs. “There’s a  _ certain subject _ that’s completely clogging the comments section of every video.” 

Lola started to respond nervously. “Yael and I were just talking about what to do…” 

“Ah, so you already talked to her about it, Hunter?” Baaz replied, speaking as if he and Hunter had some agreed-upon ‘talk’ to give Lola. Baaz’s eyes fell to Lola’s feet that were perfectly placed on a secondary chair. “Do… Do you have to sit like that? It’s very distracting.” 

“It’s comfy.” Lola shrugged, shifting and placing her feet slightly higher to protest Baaz’s protests. “I’m pregnant, leave me alone.” 

Baaz looked uncomfortable. “So did you and Hunter talk or not? This meeting was held for a very specific reason.” 

Lola looked to Yael. “Did you know about this?” She was hoping the entire vlog squad hadn’t pulled an ambush attack on her. Yael shook their head, signifying that they were just as clueless as Lola. “What’s going on?” Lola asked.

“We just think, maybe it’s better if you spend more time… behind the camera for now.” Hunter spoke up. “Just until everything blows over.” 

“I’m pregnant. Nothing is  _ blowing over  _ anytime soon.” Lola got a bit defensive.

Baaz set his laptop down, turning it around to show Lola a page of channel statistics. “It’s a  _ scandal. _ It’s distracting!  _ Eighty percent _ of this week’s comments have included the key terms ‘Lola’, ‘baby’, or ‘pregnant’. There was barely any feedback on my latest movie review because they were too busy talking about your  _ drama _ !” 

“Don’t pop a blood vessel.” Lola wasn’t feeling Baaz’s stressful vibe. “Are you trying to say I shouldn’t appear on camera until after my baby is born? Because that’s ridiculous.” Lola hadn’t honestly thought about the fate of her involvement in the vlog channel once her pregnancy got more serious. Now that Baaz was threatening to take it away, however, she was suddenly feeling super protective over her spot in All Inclusive. Who was  _ he  _ to say she should stay behind the camera?

“We just think it’s a distraction from what our content’s supposed to be.” Hunter added. “I mean, we’re not a mommy vlog.” 

Lola raised an eyebrow. “Who said I was trying to do that? I’m just trying to make it through.” 

“Well, you can’t control what people say about you, so… why not control how much you’re, you know…  _ putting it out there? _ ” Baaz spoke, unafraid of sounding like he was shaming Lola. He never was great at evaluating how much of an asshole he sounded like. 

“What, do you expect me to just suck it in?” Lola shifted in her seat and poked her stomach out more, showing off just how impossible it was to hide her condition at this point. “I can’t really hide this forever. It’s a part of who I am now. I thought this channel was supposed to be  _ All Inclusive _ .” She threw the channel name in Baaz’s face. She always thought it was slightly hypocritical that Baaz and Hunter of all people claimed to be inclusive when they judged just about everybody. 

Baaz responded with a straight face, not seeming to even sense Lola’s sarcasm. “I think you’re past sucking it in at this point. Staying off camera for a few months, maybe even taking some maternity leave, would be your best bet in my opinion. I wrote up some proposals for a few tweaks in your contract last night.” Baaz pulled out some papers from under his arm and offered them to Lola. 

Lola grabbed the papers from Baaz and dropped them on the floor, allowing them to scatter slightly. It wasn’t her intention to be so dramatic, but Baaz was really getting under her skin. “I’m not staying off camera or changing my contract. Me being pregnant doesn’t change a thing.”

“It seems like it’s been changing everything.” Hunter remarked under his breath. 

Lola was so sick of everyone’s comments and opinions, especially when they truly didn’t know what they were talking about. “Well I’m not letting it change this part of my life!” She decided out loud. “This meeting is over. Yael, would you like to help me set up some lights and cameras?” 

“You’re doing it?” Yael seemed shocked, but quickly shuffled past Baaz to grab some lighting equipment. “I wrote down some notes, just talking points if you wanted…” Yael began rambling on. 

“I know what I want to say.” Lola said simply, taking a moment to will herself to un-elevate her feet and stand up. Her feet and ankles were definitely still a bit swollen and uncomfortable. As it seemed, Lola was going to have to get used to being uncomfortable. 

...

The moment the lunch bell rang, Frankie made a beeline for the picnic table outside of Degrassi. She and Esme had been texting each other about meeting there since the first period. With every boring minute that passed, she had grown increasingly antsy for the time to come. Esme was just about the only thing in Frankie’s life right now that  _ didn’t  _ stress her out. That little talk from Miles had been in the back of her mind all morning, but she mostly just thought it was nonsense. What was so wrong about spending time with someone who made her happy? And what did her dumb older brother know anyway?

“Frankie!” Esme’s voice cut through the buzzing crowd of students exiting the building. 

Frankie turned her head and observed Esme for the first time that day. Esme always looked put-together, but she looked especially nice today. A mid-thigh pressed pink plaid skirt matched with a buttoned up white cardigan along with Esme’s signature side braid… There was no mistaking Esme’s signature style. Like a main character from  _ Gossip Girl _ or another equally unrealistic teen show, Esme Song was always dressed to the nines, way better than her peers. Somehow, though, her perfectly put together ensembles never felt weird or out of place. She just always looked…  _ cute _ .

“Hey, E.” Frankie greeted her friend, placing herself on one side of the picnic bench and inviting Esme to sit across from her. 

Instead of taking the spot across the table, Esme placed herself right next to Frankie. “How has your day been?” Esme asked, as if Frankie hadn’t been complaining over text the entire day. 

“Banning one topic off the bat,” Frankie started. “Miles and Lola. I love them, but if I have to hear their names one more time today, I might lose my marbles.”

Esme laughed. “Understandable. People were even asking  _ me  _ if the reason Tiny sucker punched your brother was because Lola wasn’t sure which one of them was the father. Like _ I  _ would know.” 

Frankie squinted for a moment. “You  _ do  _ know, though.” 

“ _ They _ don’t know that!” Esme retorted. “I’m still, like, your secret friend. Nobody really knows we’ve been kicking it for weeks except Zig. He’s starting to think you’re gonna steal me from him, by the way.” 

“You’re not a secret friend.” Frankie said before pausing for a moment to reflect. She  _ had  _ sort of been treating Esme like her father treated his affairs. Other than their short-lived Cantina date, which barely got started before the scuffle began, most of the time Frankie and Esme spent together was in private. Rendezvous in the ravine, skipping class together… Frankie hadn’t intentionally avoided hanging with Esme in public, it just kept working out that way. The two girls felt more comfortable away from the peering, judgy eyes of their peers. Frankie felt really bad at the prospect of Esme feeling like Frankie was treating her like a skeleton in her closet. “I’m sorry if I made you feel like I was hiding you.” 

Esme shrugged. “I’m used to it. Though I’d much rather not be hidden. Especially when I look this cute.” She flipped her braid over her shoulder nonchalantly. Any moment of vulnerability Esme displayed always seemed to be followed by overcompensating confidence. 

“Well, do you want to go to the play next week together? We can sit in the front row and everyone can know we’re going together.” Frankie proposed

“Is it a date?” Esme’s face lit up. 

_ Why _ , Frankie thought, was she so gung-ho to call every hangout with Frankie a  _ date _ ? Frankie chalked it up to Esme loving getting a reaction out of people, but she couldn’t help but wonder if there was something more behind Esme’s touchiness and comments.

“I don’t think Zig would appreciate that very much. He’s already onto me about my plan to steal his girlfriend.” Frankie teased, deciding to play along instead of questioning things. “Is that a yes or a no?” She asked after a few seconds of silence. 

“Yes.” Esme’s face displayed what seemed to be a genuine smile. Her presence had become an unexpected but very welcome addition to Frankie’s life. “You’re much better theater company than Zig would be. You’re buying the tickets, right?” Esme asked. 

“Are you and Zig good?” Frankie dared to ask.

Esme seemed to freeze up a little bit. “We’re fine, why?”  _ That  _ sounded like denial. Frankie knew from years of watching her mother do the exact same thing. Instead of interjecting, Frankie chose to stay silent for a moment. The silence drew more words out of Esme. “He’s just being distant and weird. Ever since I caught him and Maya kissing in the hallway…” 

“Maya kissed  _ him. _ Not the other way around.” Frankie reminded her, trying to be reassuring. She didn’t know the whole story behind that most recent kiss, but she knew Maya and Zig had history. History that Esme could easily feel like she couldn’t compare to. Frankie knew if she dated a guy like Zig who had an epic romance in his past, she would always be insecure about measuring up. “There’s no reason to be insecure. You’re Esme Song. You’re awesome.” She placed her hand on Esme’s shoulder hoping to provide some comfort. 

Esme suddenly placed her hands on either side of Frankie’s cheeks and brought her forehead close to Frankie’s - so intimately that for a moment Frankie thought Esme was leaning in for a kiss. This quick action caused Frankie’s breath to catch in her throat for a moment. Frankie had no idea why she was feeling so nervous as Esme pulled her close, but she was literally on the edge of her seat. “ _ You’re _ awesome, Frankie.” Esme said before pulling away. Just typical boundary-free Esme. “Zig may suck, but at least I have you.” 

Even after Esme backed up and began focusing on unpacking her lunch, Frankie’s entire forehead where Esme had pressed up against her felt like static. She was clueless as to why Esme was affecting her like this. “So… that’s why you stuck around with me instead of leaving with Zig yesterday at the Cantina?” 

“Because Zig sucks? Yeah, basically. Plus he was getting  _ kicked out. _ I prefer to leave with more style.” Esme unzipped a bag of baby carrots and reached in, grabbing one and popping it in her mouth. “Plus I came to the Cantina with you."

“So you’re not gonna ditch me for your boyfriend the first chance you get?” Frankie thought of the many experiences she had with Lola and Shay abandoning plans last minute for a date. “I mean, I get that you’ve been with Zig longer…” 

Esme cut Frankie off before she could finish her sentence. “I promise I won’t ditch you, especially not for Zig.” She held her pinky out, offering a promise. Who knew Esme was such a stickler for friend loyalty? 

Frankie and Esme’s pinkies linked and were held together in the air for a few moments before Esme pulled her hand away. 

“Alright, I need my hand back to eat lunch.” Esme cracked a joke, reaching her now-free hand into the bag of baby carrots once again and fishing one out. “You hungry?” She asked, waving a carrot in Frankie’s face and offering her a snack. 

…

Lola walked into the cafeteria that afternoon somehow feeling both confident and nervous at the same time. The video had been up for less than an hour and it already had hundreds of views. People were definitely staring and whispering  _ now _ , but she hoped that by confirming these rumors she would help the novelty of them wear off faster. Degrassi scandals mainly thrived on speculation and misinformation. And it was hard to  _ speculate _ about something Lola had just announced on her own. 

She wandered around the cafeteria, sort of lost in a trance. Miles was still in line for food and she couldn’t seem to find Frankie anywhere. She was about to give up and just go wait in the theater when she came across a familiar face in the sea of students. 

“Hey…” she approached Shay timidly. She wasn’t quite sure where they stood after the Cantina fiasco. “Can I sit here?”

Shay slowly nodded, clearly feeling a bit awkward too. “Everyone’s talking.”

“Oh, yeah?” Lola took a seat next to her, clutching her stomach as she sat down. “What about? Your boyfriend and my boyfriend fighting or me being set to star in the next season of  _ Teen Mom _ ?” She tried to lighten the mood a little.

“Kind of both,” Shay admitted, and smiled back clumsily. “I’m sorry for what Tiny did,” Shay added. “He shouldn’t have come at Miles like that-”

“No,  _ I’m _ sorry,” Lola interrupted before Shay could even finish her sentence. “I mean, yeah, Tiny definitely owes me apology nachos. But I know the fight wasn’t all his fault. Miles shouldn’t have been such an ass either.” She reached over and pulled Shay into a hug. To her relief, Shay hugged her back. The two girls had been through so much together over the years — there was no way their friendship could break over Tiny and Miles. But there was just so much uncertainty in Lola’s life right now, and it was nice to know she still had friends she could count on. 

“Leave it to our boyfriends to make things even more complicated, huh?” Shay sighed, but then laughed softly.

Lola eased into a smile. She glanced over Shay’s shoulder and peeked at her phone. “Ooh- who’s that cutie you’re watching?”

Shay handed the phone to her, Lola’s video already pulled up. “I was just taking a look before it starts trending on Hastygram. Three people already sent it to me in Armstrong’s class. He almost took my phone away.” She hit play, and Lola heard the sound of her own voice:

_ “My name is Lola Pacini. I’m sixteen and… I’m pregnant. And I’d like to talk about it.” _

It was hard for Lola to not instantly critique every little flaw, like her hair being kind of flat and her bump looking way more pronounced on camera. But also, she was proud of herself for owning this and refusing to let anyone make her feel small. Yael was right — this was  _ her story _ .

_ “I never thought I’d be a mom in high school. This is all really unexpected and scary, but I’ve made the decision to keep my baby and I’m gonna do everything I can to be a parent  _ and _ a Degrassi student. It may not be everyone’s choice, but it’s mine. And I’m not ashamed.” _

Shay glanced over at her and smiled proudly, which brought Lola’s fears at ease again. This wasn’t going to be easy. None of this was. But… she  _ wasn’t _ ashamed.

_ “So, for those of you who are nosy… no, I’m not having twins or quintuplets or whatever you heard. I’m almost four months along. We don’t know if it’s a boy or a girl yet. And yes… Miles  _ is  _ the father _ .  _ Don’t forget to get your tickets to I.M. Hope…!” _

Before they could finish the remaining few seconds of the video, Miles’ voice snuck up behind them. “Too bad I didn’t know about the video before. I could have made a cameo.”

Lola turned around, startled but happy to see her boyfriend. She was even happier to see the huge tray of food he was carrying, if she was honest. “I hope you’re not mad at me for not talking to you first…” she said, trying to gage his reaction.

“Mad? Of course not,” Miles took a seat next to Lola and wrapped his arm around her. “I told you, I could care less what anyone thinks. And the way I see it, anything that pisses my dad off is a good thing.” 

“Yeah, except we’re still asking for his help financially…” Lola reminded him. She hadn’t even considered how Mr. Hollingsworth might react to the public video. The words felt sort of gross coming out of her mouth — she never wanted Miles to think she was with him for his money. But at the same time, they were just teenagers, and babies weren’t cheap. Her Cantina shifts and Miles’ lifeguarding money could only cover so much. 

“I should go find Tiny,” Shay got up, sensing that Miles and Lola needed a minute. “Uh, sorry again about your face, Miles,” she added awkwardly. 

Miles shrugged, not seeming too worked up over it anymore. “Yeah... sorry too.” Lola supposed she was satisfied with that for now, but she would definitely make sure he and Tiny  _ properly  _ apologized to each other later. The last thing she needed was for all her friends to hate each other.

Miles turned his attention back to Lola. “So...Frankie didn’t tell you yet?” Miles asked once Shay left. Lola shook her head in confusion.  _ Tell her what? _ “Mom gave in,” he smiled. “She won’t pay for  _ everything _ , but she said she’ll cover the doctor bills and buy us a crib for my graduation present. We still have to buy clothes and diapers and stuff, but… it’s something.”

“Oh my god, seriously?!” Lola wanted to squeal, she was so relieved. They still didn’t really have a thought-out plan for how they were going to manage everything, but it felt like they were starting to get somewhere at least. Having their families on board, or at least somewhat willing to help, was a huge step. She planted a big kiss on his cheek. “Oh, thank you, thank you,  _ thank you _ , Miles!”

Miles winced. “Still a little sore there…” he reminded her, his cheek still pretty banged up.

“Oops,” Lola said, and stroked his face gently. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be,” Miles said, and kissed the palm of her hand. “Now, let’s eat and watch this video I keep hearing about. I hear the girl in it is  _ hot _ .”

Lola laughed and slid the lunch tray in front of her as he pulled up her video. A piece of pizza, two bean and cheese taquitos, a little thing of applesauce, and a carton of chocolate milk. Somehow Miles had gotten her cravings exactly right.


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola and Miles work together to prepare and perform I.M. Hope. Frankie and Esme have a moment of clarity followed by a traumatic moment they’ll never forget. Check chapter notes for trigger warnings please!!)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: suicide attempt, overdose

“I can’t believe tonight is the play.” Frankie struck up a conversation with Esme as they made their way from the front steps of Degrassi into the school building. 

“Have you bought our tickets yet?” Esme questioned. “Because I wanna hang with you, but I also really don’t want to spend like two hours listening to your brother gush about Lola.” She feigned sticking a finger down her throat and gagging. “No offense. I don’t mind PDA, but writing a play about someone and forcing the whole school to watch…?” 

Frankie shrugged, her eyes catching on the I.M Hope graphics which covered flyers and monitors all over Degrassi’s hallways. “I think it’s sweet. And I’m sorta proud of my brother for pulling all of this together.” She admitted. “And he technically gave me comp tickets, so… didn’t have to spend a dime on the tix, but I got ‘em.” She held up two tickets. 

Esme reached over and attempted to grab the tickets from Frankie’s hand. “What if we traded these tickets for like, two bottles of wine? I know a senior who makes the weirdest trades, I bet he’d be down.” 

Frankie laughed. “No, Esme. We’re going and we’re gonna have fun. If you’re good, maybe we can get ice cream at The Dot after.” 

Esme and Frankie leaned up against a wall in the foyer for a moment. Students were still arriving so the entrance and halls were looking a bit crowded, but Frankie noticed one particular face among the crowd -- Maya. The blonde girl was looking more tired than usual, holding a small gold box in her hand and looking around sort of dazed and aimlessly.

“Who do you think she’s looking for?” Frankie asked Esme, her hands reaching into the pockets of her denim jacket looking for somewhere comfortable to settle. “And what’s in the box?” 

“Better not be Zig.” Esme huffed. “But who knows? He completely blew me off last night and only texted me twice this morning. I think I’m really losing him.” Her tone got considerably more worried. Stressing Esme out by pointing out Maya was the absolute last thing Frankie had been trying to do.

Maya finally found her target -- _Jonah_ . Frankie and Esme were too far to hear anything Jonah or Maya was saying, but they were definitely watching. Jonah and Maya talked politely for less than a minute before Jonah reached into his pocket and handed Maya a ticket to the play. The box remained in Maya’s hand, though. _Curious._

Jonah walked away from Maya and the smile on Maya’s face immediately wiped and her demeanor changed back to looking disconnected and dazed. 

“Do you think she’s okay?” Frankie asked Esme but didn’t get a response. Frankie looked over and saw that Esme’s attention had been diverted to Zig, who was across the hall having a dance battle with Tiny. Frankie smiled slightly, glad that Esme’s concerns about Zig were calmed for the time being. “See? You’re not losing him. You just might have to share him with Tiny.” 

Esme managed to give a weak smile at that comment, but Frankie could tell she wasn’t convinced. “Let’s go see them. I wanna see if I can peel Zig away from his _boyfriend_ before the bell rings.” 

…

Ever since releasing her vlog and officially setting the record straight about her pregnancy, it seemed like slightly less people were watching Lola’s every move. Sure, there were still stares and whispers as she casually toted a slightly noticeable baby bump under her grey t-shirt embroidered with pearls and gems, but at least the speculation and gossip had died down. Now everyone just _knew_. 

As Lola approached her locker, she was shocked to find a beautiful floral arrangement with pink, purple and white daisies. Those had been her favorite colors since she was a child. Her heart swelled as she tore the arrangement from her locker and held it tight to her chest. She was _so lucky_. 

After grabbing what she needed from her locker, Lola made her way toward where she assumed Miles would be. The play was only a few short hours away, so she was sure that he was either in the auditorium or in the costume area. Either way, she knew he’d be checking over every detail to ensure opening night would be perfect. 

Lola checked the auditorium first, but the only ones in there were Grace and Jonah, who were in the middle of a very flirty-looking tech rehearsal. Lola made a mental note to be mad at Jonah for possibly moving on from Frankie later. 

“Sorry to interrupt.” Lola said, watching as Jonah and Grace quickly separated from one another as soon as they noticed Lola’s presence. “Have you guys seen Miles anywhere?” 

“Nice flowers.” Grace remarked. “He’s not here, though.”

“Did Miles get those for you?” Jonah asked slightly mockingly. Lola just nodded.

“I wanna thank him.” Lola said. 

Grace and Jonah exchanged a suggestive look, then burst out laughing together. “I think you already did that.” Grace joked. 

Lola rolled her eyes. “Oh, hush.” Clearly they weren’t going to be any help. She continued to the room where all of the costumes, hair and makeup were. She burst through the door a bit quickly, opening the curtains and revealing a shirtless Miles. _“Oh, hey.”_ She held the flowers to her chest instinctively, covering herself even though Miles was the one who was mostly exposed. 

“Hello to you too.” Miles said, clearly feeling self-satisfied noticing Lola’s flustered reaction to his shirtlessness. 

“Should I…” Lola turned around, still blushing at the unexpected sight of Miles shirtless. She only stood like that for a second before Miles grabbed her shoulders and turned her around to face him. 

“It’s not like we haven’t seen each other like this before.” Miles teased. He glanced pointedly at her baby bump. “Obviously.”

It was true, but seeing him like this still gave her so many butterflies. It reminded her of the first time she slept over at Frankie’s house when she was thirteen and Miles walked around shirtless and she couldn’t keep her eyes off him every time he walked through the room during her and Frankie’s _Twilight_ marathon. Miles was _such_ an Edward. The only thing he was missing was the sharp teeth and glittery skin. 

“...True.” Lola hesitantly stepped toward her shirtless boyfriend and tried to keep her eyes on his face. She wasn’t sure if it was the hormones or what, but part of her brain couldn’t stop thinking about a secret makeout session while they were alone and behind a curtain. She wondered if the door to this room locked…

“Where’d you get those?” Miles asked, referencing the flowers that Lola had forgotten she was holding. 

“Wait — these aren’t from you?” Lola looked down at the flowers and noticed a note sticking out between two of the flowers. “I just assumed…” She pulled the card out and opened it. 

_‘Good luck on your play tonight. Hope to see you soon. Miss and love you, Chiquilla. XOXO, Mama.’_

Lola stared at the note for a moment before handing it to Miles wordlessly.

“Oh.” Miles said as soon as he finished reading the note. He knew Lola’s history with her mother. He had been the only one Lola ever felt comfortable opening up to about all of the details regarding that situation. Miles was the only person Lola had ever met who seemed to understand the complicated feelings she had about her mom. “Does she know about the baby?” 

“Yeah.” Lola admitted. Between everything that had happened recently, she had almost forgotten that her father had met up with her mother and had told her about Lola’s pregnancy. “My dad shared the news with her about it the day everything went down at the Cantina. I forgot to tell you.”

Miles reached his arm out, touching Lola’s shoulder lightly. “Are you okay?”

Lola didn’t know how to answer that question. “The flowers are pretty,” she said instead. 

She knew that the flowers were supposed to be a nice gesture from her mother, but it was honestly also a gigantic distraction. She had been able to mostly push away the thought of her mother coming back into her life since her father had mentioned it -- mostly because she was so freaking stressed about everything else. The play, the baby, her vlog… but now this thing with her mom was at the forefront of her brain at the worst time. 

Miles, sensing Lola’s growing stress, pulled her into a warm embrace. Lola breathed in slowly as her cheeks warmed up, pressed against Miles’ chest. “You smell so good...” she said, the words slipping out before she could control them. Miles holding her was such an easy and effective distraction from every problem in the world. “Sorry. That was weird. But you do smell good…” She held him tighter and took in another deep breath, clearing her head and enjoying his scent. Her sense of smell getting stronger had been a negative side effect of pregnancy for the most part thus far, but she was enjoying this part of it. 

After the two lingered for a moment in one another’s arms, Miles let out a slight chuckle. 

“What?” Lola blushed, pulling away to observe Miles’ expression to understand why he was laughing. 

“Nothing. You’re just cute.” Miles said, placing a kiss on the tip of Lola’s nose. “And… I love you.” He said it much more seamlessly and confidently this time. Hearing Miles say those three words and truly mean it made Lola feel like the happiest and safest girl in the entire universe -- like she could do anything. Despite all the chaos that had ensued since he entered her life, she had never felt more secure. 

“I love you too.” Lola said, leaning up and getting onto the tips of her toes to kiss Miles on the lips. “Are you ready for tonight?” 

Miles bent down slightly for her so she wouldn’t have to reach too high to kiss him — _such a gentleman_. “I think so,” he said, wiping the trace of Lola’s lipstick off his face. “I just hope I don’t forget any of my lines.”

Lola clung to his chest still. “Well, if you do, I can always rescue you.”

Miles gave her a crooked smile. “I think you _did_ rescue me.”

Lola felt her cheeks flush with pink. Miles always knew how to make her blush in just a few words. But he had a point— they had come such a long way since that day in the hallway at the beginning of the semester. “You rescued me too.”

She just clung to Miles for a moment, appreciating the warmth of his body. There was something really comforting about him holding her and knowing their baby was right there in between them. “You okay?” she whispered after a bit of silence. 

“Mhmm,” Miles said. He was still smiling, but something in his voice sounded a little off to Lola. She eyed him, giving him a ‘mom’ look. He slowly let go of Lola and sighed. “It’s nothing, really. It’s just, Zoe told me today that Tristan is coming back next semester.”

“Oh,” Lola said. She really didn’t know what to say. She was glad he was recovering, but the thought of facing him admittedly made her worry, especially now that the details of her pregnancy were out in the open. It wasn’t that she doubted Miles’ loyalty to her, it was just… how could it not be awkward? 

“It doesn’t mean anything for us,” Miles tried to reassure her. “I promise.”

Lola just nodded. She really didn’t want to think about Tristan right now, or her mom, or the play, or the fact that her costume didn’t fit anymore. She just wanted to distract herself. And her shirtless boyfriend standing two feet in front of her was a _very_ good distraction. 

“How much time do you think we have before Jonah and Grace come back here?” she whispered, and before she knew it, Miles’ lips were right back on hers.

...

“Do we have to stay the whole time?” Esme groaned, her tone starting off grumpy before she or Frankie could even enter the auditorium. 

Frankie fished the tickets from her purse and handed one to Esme as they entered the small line of students waiting to gain entrance. “You promised. Stay through the play and then we get ice cream with unlimited toppings at The Dot afterward.” 

“I’m not Lola, I can’t be bribed with ice cream.” Esme pointed out. 

“Gelato?” Frankie offered. 

“Slightly better. I’d still prefer, like, a bottle of wine, though.” Esme shrugged.

Frankie rolled her eyes. “If you’re really good, you can spend the night and I might be able to swipe a bottle from my mom’s wine fridge.” She knew stealing a bottle from her mom’s vast collection was likely possible -- she hadn’t done it herself, but she had observed Miles swiping bottles undetected for years. Either their mother was completely clueless or she just didn’t think it was too big a deal. Frankie wasn’t sure if their mother had become more aware since Miles had gone through his issues last year, but she honestly highly doubted it. Their mother did her best to be aware, but she was pretty prone to having blind spots when it came to her children.

“I would’ve settled for gelato.” Esme stuck her tongue out at Frankie as the two girls entered the auditorium and handed their tickets to Yael. As they made their way to their assigned seats, Esme quickly tugged Frankie’s arm and directed her toward seats closer to the front. “Your best friend and brother are running the damn thing. We deserve the best seats in the house.” 

Frankie reluctantly agreed. “Technically those are someone else’s seats…” 

“They’ll get over it!” Esme said, firmly planting herself in one of the seats and wiggling her butt around, confirming that she had no intention of moving. 

People started filling up the auditorium slowly as curtain time neared. Frankie looked around and noticed several familiar faces. Tiny and Shay had made themselves comfortable and were snuggling up with one another near the back— apparently Shay had forced Tiny to apologize to Miles and Lola for the Cantina mishap and the apology was good enough that Lola still gave Shay free tickets. Mr. Pacini was sitting on his own, examining a play program. Frankie’s mother had gotten there early and was off to the side, readying her camera despite a clear “no photography” sign. Another familiar face, one that Frankie had honestly forgotten since that morning, Maya Matlin entered and seemed to be caught up in a short conversation with Yael. Maya was still holding that small gold box. Frankie couldn’t lie -- her curiosity was more than piqued. 

“Hey, do you think…” Frankie started bringing Maya up to Esme but quickly paused. Esme was already in an iffy mood. The last thing Frankie needed was to remind Esme about Maya or Zig again -- she’d never hear the end of it then. Quick subject change. “Do you think I would look good with a braid like yours?” 

Frankie quickly glanced back at Maya again and she could swear that Maya was looking right back at her and Esme. Was this Maya’s seat? Esme had influenced Frankie to dial back her overthinking a considerable amount, but something about Maya’s strange demeanor was eating at Frankie. 

Esme, not completely fooled, turned around and spotted Maya. “She’s here? Ugh. Are you sure we can’t dip out? I know a spot on the roof…” 

“No!” Frankie chastised Esme. “I told you, we’re supporting Lola and Miles tonight. You can take me on the school roof another night.” 

“There won’t be another night where the school is unlocked at night!” Esme made a decent point, but Frankie wasn’t budging. 

“Again… no.” Frankie said. The lights in the auditorium slowly started dimming signifying that the show was about to begin. “It’ll be fine. I’m pretty sure Miles said the play was under two hours.” Now she was just completely messing with Esme. She had no idea what the runtime of the play was, but she knew it wasn’t nearly that long. 

Before Esme could respond, the play’s score -- a cacophony of bus crash sounds -- began. Graphics depicting different panicked text messages from the day of the crash started popping up on the screens and Miles began walking from the back of the auditorium, reciting texts similar to what he must have sent Tristan the night of the crash. 

“Where are you? Answer me.” Miles said, pretending to frantically text on his phone. The play had officially begun. 

Frankie hadn’t really realized just how close to home this play was going to hit. She thought back to the day of the crash, feeling all of the panic and fear that not knowing had caused. Suddenly, she understood why some students thought the play could be triggering. She was fine after a moment, but reliving those moments of anxiety brought her back for a moment in a way that was sort of overwhelming. This was what good art did, she had always heard. It made you feel something. 

Frankie looked back to check and see if Maya had found another seat but she was nowhere to be found. She tried not to focus on that for now. Tonight was Miles and Lola’s night. All she needed to do right now was focus and enjoy the fruits of her brother and best friend’s labors. 

…

“I want to see you, Hope.” Miles paced around the stage delivering his lines with emotion. 

The first portion of the play, mostly about Miles’ summer by Tristan’s side while he was in a coma, had been well-written but more than a bit depressing. Re-living the anguish, hopelessness and guilt that Miles felt for months, remembering how much he’d struggled to find someone to understand him... Frankie was very glad that Hope was introduced into the narrative, both in real life and in the play. It took her awhile to get used to the idea of Miles and Lola… or, Hero and Hope, together -- but at the end of the day -- and in the play, they truly seemed like the best, healthiest option for one another. 

“You can’t.” Lola responded as a text message coinciding with what she was saying popped up on the screen behind Miles. “He’s only made it this far because you were by his side.” 

“But I’ve only made it this far because you were by mine.” Miles said, and Frankie’s heart stopped for a moment. That… that was the line that encapsulated everything and made Frankie fully understand where her brother was coming from. She could only hope the rest of the audience would understand him now too. “Please… you’ve given me so much. You changed my entire life, Hope.” Miles said, now stepping closer to Lola and allowing their lips to almost touch. “I love you.” He whispered barely loud enough for the audience to hear. Frankie had to wonder if that last line was part of the play… it felt very intimate. 

Esme’s hushed voice broke through and took Frankie’s attention from the intense scene. “Blah, blah… they fall in love, Lola gets knocked up, they leave Tristan to rot in a hospital bed... I’ve seen this one.” Esme clearly wasn’t as emotionally invested in the play and had zero intention of pretending to be. 

Frankie nudged Esme’s shoulders lightly. “Chill.” She said. “It’s almost over. You can’t sit still?” 

“I gotta pee.” Esme said, attempting to stand up. 

Frankie quickly pulled her back down into her seat. “Come on, please behave.” She felt like she was wrangling a child. 

“You gonna make me pee in my seat? I’m pretty sure that’d be a bigger distraction than a quick bathroom break…” Esme acted as if she was threatening to actually go through with wetting her skirt. She was acting like a bigger brat than Frankie did when she was eight and wanted something extravagant at the toy shop -- and that was saying something. 

“Fine, just come right back.” Frankie responded, rolling her eyes slightly and trying to turn her attention back to the play. 

“I can’t go alone!” Esme was still acting like a bit of a child. “Buddy system, right?” 

Frankie sighed, looking up at the stage and gauging if Miles or Lola would notice her leaving the auditorium for a few minutes. Miles was deep into a monologue about breaking up with Tristan while Lola was off-stage, probably fixing her hair and makeup before the last scene. This was likely the best time to sneak out. “Fine.” 

Esme clapped lightly, satisfied with herself for convincing Frankie to leave the auditorium. She then grabbed Frankie’s left hand and pulled her out of the seat. The two girls scurried toward the exit, doing their best to not block anyone’s view or distract from the production. Frankie led Esme toward the nearest bathroom, hoping they could get this over with before the end of the play, but Esme quickly grabbed Frankie’s hand and led her in a different direction. 

“Just a few minutes on the roof? I’ll make it worth your while…” Esme sounded almost like she was trying to seduce Frankie. “Come on, don’t you want to be at the top of the world?” 

“No! I wanna be here for Miles and Lola…” Frankie said. She didn’t like Esme pushing her like this. “The play is almost over. We can skip out on the afterparty and go to the roof if you really want.” What was so great about the stupid roof anyway?

Esme yanked at Frankie’s hand a bit. “No, come on. Let’s go!” 

“What’s your problem?” Frankie pulled her arm back, not fully losing Esme’s grip. “You’re being even more difficult than usual. Do you not wanna be here with me?” 

“It’s not you.” Esme mumbled, seeming to be uninclined to open up. “I’m just sick of being here, sick of sitting still in that dumb stuffy room watching your dumb brother’s stupid play.”

“Do you have to insult Miles and the play?” Frankie responded. “He worked really hard. Both he and Lola did. I wanted to be there for them tonight, not have to babysit you.”

Esme rolled her eyes. “You don’t. Don’t worry. Just go.” 

“I don’t want to go!” Frankie raised her voice more than she originally intended and it echoed slightly through the empty hallway. “I want to be here with you, hanging out and having fun. That plan is kinda ruined when you’re in a sour mood and won’t talk to me.” 

“I’m not in a sour mood.” Esme denied, now refusing eye contact with Frankie. This getting was more than frustrating. “I can’t think here. I don’t want to talk here.” 

Frankie sighed, reluctantly allowing Esme to pull her toward the door for the school roof. She had already probably missed the end of the play by now. She just had to hope Lola or Miles didn’t notice her absence… At least if they went up onto the roof they could have a little bit of alone time and Frankie could figure out why Esme was being so bullheaded and strange. 

The two girls arrived at a door with a big sign that said ‘Do Not Open. Alarm Will Sound!’. 

“Oops, looks like we can’t go up there!” Frankie was more than glad to dodge this risky endeavor. She liked taking risks with Esme, but this was just poorly planned and timed.

The sign wasn’t enough to deter Esme. She just shrugged and reached out, turning the door handle and opening it. Frankie flinched, expecting her ears to be filled with a loud alarm, but there was nothing. 

“You don’t let stupid signs control what you do, do you?” Esme rested her back against the door, holding it open for Frankie. 

“Why have you been such a brat tonight?” Frankie questioned, still standing in the doorway. “Now that I followed you to the roof…” 

“Nothing is wrong.” Esme’s eyes slightly glazed over. It was clear Esme wanted distractions -- not deep conversations. That may have worked with Zig, who seemed like he’d drop any serious discussion for a chance to reach third base, but Frankie was sort of starting to think she cared about Esme more than Zig. Or at least… she cared in a different way. 

Frankie looked at Esme, clearly not convinced. “What’s going on, Esme?” She continued to probe. 

“It’s just… I can’t stop thinking about stupid Zig. He’s been pulling away for weeks and I feel so helpless and boring. I feel like I’ve been pulling out all the stops and he just doesn’t love me anymore…” 

Frankie placed a hand on Esme’s shoulder. “You are not boring, Esme. You’re anything but. If Zig doesn’t love you, then… he’s an idiot. You’re the best, Esme. Kind of a pain in the ass sometimes, but... you’re not like anyone I’ve ever met. In a good way.” She observed the corners of Esme’s lips slightly upturning, indicating that Esme’s mood was lightening at least a little bit. That inspired Frankie to continue. “I’m not kidding, Esme. You shouldn’t have to force Zig to pay attention to you. If he was really the right person, he’d just want to spend time with you. I learned that with Jonah. Sometimes, even if you really want things to work with a guy, sometimes they’re just not right.” 

“I’m just scared to let him go.” Esme allowed a single tear to roll down her cheek. Frankie could tell it was taking everything in Esme to keep her emotions in control. “He’s the only person who loves me. My dad can barely look at me, my mom...” She trailed off, clearly not wanting to discuss her mom. Frankie had no idea what the deal with Esme’s mother was but she had to assume it wasn’t good. “People at school can’t stand me…”

Frankie raised her eyebrows and offered Esme a supportive half-smile. “What about me?” 

Esme paused. Her eyes, which had mostly been fixated on the ground, fell on Frankie. “What about you?” Her voice sounded much weaker than usual. Hard emotions and stress had taken a toll on Esme’s usual chipper, smart tone. 

The next thing Frankie said slipped out, but in a way where Frankie knew she truly meant it. She just didn’t know what it meant. “I love you. Don’t I count for something?” 

Those words seemed to affect Esme like a drug. Immediately, her demeanor went from agitated and panic-stricken to relaxed with a beaming smile on her face. “You…” Esme’s eyes seemed to examine each part of Frankie’s face. Her eyes, her nose, her lips... She was definitely getting closer until… 

Esme’s lips met Frankie’s. 

Esme’s lips tasted like peppermint chapstick. Not quite the cherry flavor that Katy Perry had promised all those years ago, but Frankie had to admit, the kiss was nice. So nice that she got lost in it for a moment, allowing Esme’s fingers to entangle slightly in her long, wavy brown hair. Kissing a girl felt way different than any boy she had ever kissed. It was a strange, but good type of different. 

After a few moments of kissing, Frankie detached herself from Esme and studied her features for a moment, trying to figure out what either of them were feeling in this moment. 

“Wow.” Esme said finally. “I knew you had a crush on me.” She taunted slightly. 

“Shut up.” Frankie allowed herself to laugh. Their faces were still dangerously close and she wondered if she should pull away. “Do you feel a little better now?” She asked, though she was pretty sure she knew the answer based on Esme’s current smirk. 

Esme was the first to pull away. “Yeah, all I needed was a kiss from my new best friend who may or may not be in love with me now.” 

“You kissed me too...” Frankie’s cheeks got slightly hot. She knew Esme was just teasing -- that was about all she knew and understood about this whole situation. Her feelings about and possibly for Esme were suddenly about ten thousand times more complex than they were a moment ago. Was Esme into girls? Was Frankie into girls now? There were far too many questions.

“I know!” Esme admitted casually, finally fully stepping away from Frankie and beginning to explore the roof slightly. Frankie stood there for a moment, still fully processing what had just happened. Her thoughts were immediately interrupted, however, when Esme called out… “Wait, what the hell is that?” 

Frankie looked over but Esme had already rushed halfway across the roof. There was definitely something near the ledge, and the closer Frankie got, the more it looked like the worst case scenario... it was Maya.

“Oh my god!” Frankie screamed, rushing over to Esme, now crouched over Maya’s lifeless body. There was foam going down Maya’s cheeks and her eyes were open but glassy. This was undoubtedly the scariest thing Frankie had ever seen in real life.

Esme’s voice was desperate. “She’s OD’ing!” 

OD’ing as in… Overdosing. Maya didn’t do drugs. Did that mean… “Did she try to kill herself? Oh my god, what do we do?” Frankie asked. She had never felt so useless and helpless. Someone was dying in front of her and she was just… panicking. “Should we make her throw up? Shove our fingers down her throat or something?” Frankie offered up knowledge she had learned from some TV show. 

“No! You can’t… You never do that! I learned that with…” Esme paused for a moment, seeming to want to hold in information, but panic took over and she blurted it out. “I learned that with my mom! I can’t… we can’t...” Her brain seemed to be unable to form words. Esme reached down and she began turning Maya’s body into a different position. “This will help until the ambulance arrives…” She said shakily. 

Everything felt like it was crumbling in the matter of less than a minute. Frankie had a feeling somewhere deep inside of herself that going to the roof would be a bad idea but she had no idea that something like this would happen. Frankie reached into her pocket and grabbed her phone, dialing 911 and watching Esme as she did her best to save Maya’s life. Tears filled Esme’s eyes and her entire body was shaking as she sobbed over Maya’s body, clearly desperate to do something to help. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Please consider giving us comments & kudos! We have been working really hard on this story for almost a year and love hearing feedback and love!  
> ♡︎♡︎♡︎


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola, Frankie, Miles and Esme convene at the hospital to check on Maya's condition.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: talks of suicide/death, overdose and hospitals.

The afterparty for I.M. Hope had just begun kicking off when the ambulances arrived. For a moment, everyone was just confused, watching where the EMTs were going and wondering who needed help. Then, horror spread as people overheard the nature of the emergency -- a female student overdosing on the roof. 

That feeling of horror, however, paled in comparison to the way that the room went cold when everyone discovered the  _ identity _ of the person being wheeled out on a gurney --  _ Maya Matlin _ . 

Miles and Lola were silent almost the entire drive to the hospital. What do you say in a situation like this? Lola was worried if she opened her mouth to speak she might end up barfing all over the interior of Miles’ car. None of this felt real. It all felt like a sick, terrifying dream. 

“I can’t believe Maya was in that headspace…” Miles finally said as he spotted the sign for the hospital and made a quick turn. Only about a mile away now. “I should’ve known, I should’ve noticed… A few weeks back, she talked to me…” Miles put his hand to his forehead — something Lola knew he only did when he was really stressed. 

Lola wanted to tell him to take a deep breath but she didn’t want to interrupt whatever he was about to say. 

“I was stressed about the baby stuff and Tristan and everything… I was just casually talking to her and she said that if I didn’t want to deal with my problems, maybe I should just kill myself. I should’ve seen that as a sign. I should’ve done something.” His voice sounded broken and guilty. 

Lola knew that Miles and Maya had a good deal of history, so she guessed that it made a lot of sense why Miles was so impacted. The pure tragedy of the situation was enough for Lola to be distraught. Lola couldn’t imagine how much more intensely she’d feel if she was actually close with Maya at one point. 

“You couldn’t have known,” Lola tried to reassure him. Her hand reached down to rub her stomach. Something about feeling connected with her baby helped in a time like this. “It’s not your fault, Miles. Obviously you know that.” 

Miles nodded. “I know... It’s just…” He paused, pulling into the hotel parking lot and beginning to scan for a free parking spot. “She was always there for me when I needed it most. I can’t help but feel crappy.” 

Lola pointed out an empty parking spot and Miles quickly pulled into it. The hospital was surprisingly packed for an average night. “I understand feeling crappy,” she said as Miles took the keys out of the ignition. She wished she had the perfect words for this moment, but she really didn’t. It hurt to see the person she loved in so much pain and not be able to do anything. “You never know what’s going on inside someone else’s head. You can’t blame yourself…” she added, but felt like she was just rambling at this point. She just wanted to  _ help _ somehow.

“I  _ know _ . I’m just…” Miles threw his hands to his lap, exasperated. “Let’s go inside.” 

Lola wanted things to be on a better note as they walked from the car to the hospital, but she knew that was nearly impossible right now. At least until they heard news that Maya was going to recover from this, things were going to feel  _ tense _ . Lola seriously, seriously hoped they were going to receive good news tonight. 

Upon entering the hospital, Lola’s entire body began shivering. Miles immediately noticed and placed his oversized red jacket over Lola’s shoulders, then put his arm around Lola and led her to the waiting area. The fact that Miles could anticipate and fulfill her needs even during such a horrible time made Lola’s heart warm up just a little bit. 

Grace, Zoe, Frankie and Esme immediately rose to their feet when Lola and Miles entered the waiting area.  _ What were Frankie and Esme doing there? _

“Are you guys okay?” Grace asked, nervously twiddling a small ring shaped like a guitar in her fingers. 

“Is  _ Maya _ okay?” Lola asked before responding to Grace’s question. She pulled Miles’ oversized jacket around her like a security blanket before taking a seat and resting her swollen feet. “Miles and I are fine. Just… shaken up. That’s all. This was not how we expected the night to go...” 

“We haven’t heard about Maya yet.” Zoe responded before bursting into tears. From the way her makeup was smudged, this was far from the first time Zoe had cried tonight. “I can’t believe this is happening…”

Grace took over speaking, pulling Zoe into a close side-hug and attempting to provide some comfort. “Maya’s mom and sister are back there now waiting on word from the doctors.”

“Good.” Miles said, taking a seat next to Lola and wrapping his arm around her, making it clear that Lola’s well-being was his next concern after receiving an update on Maya. 

…

Frankie sat next to Esme while they waited, casually keeping her arm around her to comfort her. Even if Esme wasn’t flat-out sobbing, Frankie could tell she was absolutely distraught. She couldn’t stop thinking about what Esme had said on the roof,  _ “I learned that with my mom.” _ She’d assumed Esme’s mom was just out of the picture. But she’d never thought… Suddenly, so many things about Esme made sense.

Frankie glanced across the room at her brother and best friend. Lola was curled up in Miles’ oversized jacket and he was rubbing her back. They both looked scared, especially Miles. She hadn’t seen this much fear in his eyes since the day of the crash. “You okay?” she whispered to him, breaking the silence.

Miles just shook his head. Clearly he wasn’t. Frankie could tell he was blaming himself. “I should have known,” he said. “I should have seen the signs, I should have-”

“Will you stop?” Esme spoke up suddenly. “It’s nobody’s fault. You can’t know…” She broke into a sob, causing Frankie to squeeze her hand as tight as she could. If _ she _ was feeling scared, she couldn’t imagine how Esme must have been feeling. It had to be traumatizing and re-traumatizing in so many ways. Frankie wished she could do something, anything, to make Esme feel better. To let her know she wasn’t alone, that she didn’t think she was crazy or weird for feeling like this. Maybe if Maya had had someone do that for her… Frankie settled for just holding Esme’s hand. At least she could offer that.

…

Lola leaned into Miles’ embrace, truly desperate for comfort. She couldn’t imagine what Maya’s mother and sister were going through right now. Not knowing if the person you love most in the world was going to make it through the night and being completely helpless to do anything about it… she couldn’t even begin to imagine that level of pain. Suddenly, a wave of dread washed over Lola. Her eyes fell down to the small bump under her dress — her  _ baby _ , who she could only fully protect as long as they were still inside of her. Once she gave birth and that baby turned into a toddler, then into a child, teenager, adult… Lola could do everything in her power to try and protect them, but she still wouldn’t always be able to control what happened to her child, good or bad. She guessed she always knew that in theory, but she honestly hadn’t been able to think that far ahead until now, when she was imagining herself in Mrs. Matlin’s shoes. 

Miles, who had been rubbing Lola’s back in small circles, seemed to pick up on her anxiety quickly. “What’s on your mind?” 

“Do you think…” Lola choked up a bit. She  _ hated  _ crying in public. “Can we really do this?” She placed Miles’ hand on her stomach, really needing to feel connected to both him and the baby at this moment. This was the first time since she had made the decision to keep her baby that she really, truly had begun to doubt herself. “What if I mess everything up?” 

“You are not going to mess everything up, Lola.” Miles said immediately. “If anyone’s messing things up, it’s me. But I’ve gotten so much better since you’ve been around. Everything has. You make me want to be better for all three of us.” His hand still rested on her stomach, but now his grip on her rounding belly was more intentional. “I hate to say it, but… If things had gone differently this semester, it could’ve been me on that roof.” Miles admitted shakily. “I told you before and I meant it. You are my hope. I love you.”

Lola’s whole body became electrified. “I love you,” she said. The words became easier and easier every time she said them. Especially when Miles was able to comfort her like this so naturally. She really didn’t know if she would’ve been able to keep this baby without Miles. He was what made this scary journey — and  _ everything else  _ worthwhile. “I’m just scared.” She admitted something that she knew he already knew. 

“Me too.” Miles said, pulling Lola’s forehead to his mouth and placing several light kisses. “Me too.” 

…

Maya’s sister Katie came out into the waiting room, causing everyone to snap back into focus. Katie’s eyes were red and puffy and she looked shaken up, but not broken. Frankie couldn’t help but feel a tiny, desperate glimmer of hope that things were okay. 

“She’s gonna make it,” Katie finally spoke, still crying a little. “She’s been through something and it’s been really hard, but...I hope you guys will stand by her side through this.” 

“We will,” Grace said instantly with a sob, and Zoe and Jonah and Miles immediately nodded in agreement. The friends hugged Maya’s sister, sharing a moment together, everyone just so relieved. Lola and Frankie, still in their seats, exchanged a glance, both emotional and exhausted, but grateful. Frankie had seen some intense stuff over the years — the bus crash, Hunter’s mental health, their dad’s abuse, Lola’s unplanned pregnancy… at this point, Frankie wasn’t sure if she was good in a crisis or merely just used to them.

“It’s alright,” she whispered to Esme, and pulled her close. “You did the right thing tonight. You saved her. It’s going to be alright now, I promise…” 

“I’m glad you’re here with me, Frankie.” Esme said quietly. 

Things could have turned out so differently that night. If Esme hadn’t been such a brat and dragged her out to the roof, if they hadn’t found Maya, if Esme hadn’t known what to do… it was crazy how much life could change in just a single moment. Frankie sighed and kissed the top of Esme’s head. “Me too,” she whispered, and something in her shook loose. She didn’t know what the feeling was exactly, but it was something very real. 

Frankie looked over to Miles and Lola, observing them hugging one another with a sense of restored hope. Frankie’s eyes fell to Lola’s baby bump, which was getting more prominent by the day. She thought back to everything that had happened this semester and how differently things had turned out than she expected. Despite the whirlwind of drama, everything was going to be okay. 

“Wanna go check on Lola?” Esme offered. “I could stand to go find the vending machine. I’m kinda parched.” Her voice still sounded a bit broken. Frankie didn’t really want to leave Esme alone quite yet. 

Frankie grabbed Esme’s hand and walked a few feet over to where Miles and Lola were still holding one another tight. “Hey brother?” she started.

Miles turned around and broke his embrace with Lola. “Yeah, Franks?” His gaze immediately went down to Frankie and Esme’s joined hands. Frankie was sure he had a million questions, but she was glad he refrained. “What’s up?” 

“I think I’d like a minute alone with my best friend. Do you think you could help Esme find the vending machine for some water? I know you know your way around this place better than any of us do.”

“Sure.” Miles nodded, breaking away from Lola and looking at Esme with the kindest expression he could muster. “There’s a few right down the hall. Anyone else want anything?” 

Frankie appreciated him for not bringing old drama and biases into the way he treated Esme right now. Perhaps he was just too emotionally exhausted to bother, but Frankie liked to believe he could possibly see the positive impact Frankie and Esme had on one another. Or maybe there was a chance he knew about Esme’s mom too? 

“Peanut butter cookies — if they have any.” Lola shyly interjected. 

Miles placed a kiss on Lola’s forehead before disappearing down the hall with Esme. 

Frankie looked at Lola for a moment before her eyes began welling up with tears. “I’m so glad you’re in my life, Lo.” she started, speaking right from her heart. Before she could speak again, Lola pulled her into a tight hug. “I will always be there for you — you know that, right?” Frankie now felt like she needed to reassure everybody in her life of that. She didn’t ever want another scare like this for herself or anyone else she loved. 

“I know.” Lola said, leaving wet tears on Frankie’s shirt as they continued to comfort one another. “I never wanna imagine my life without you or Miles… you’re like family, you know?” Lola pulled away and looked Frankie in the eye. “And pretty soon we’ll be even more family. I really want you to be with me every step of the way, Franks.”

Frankie started crying again. She knew the emotional whirlwind was far from over, but she had hoped that the crying portion of the evening was at least over. “Of course I will.” Frankie said shakily. 

She could've never imagined feeling like this based on the moment she found out about Miles and Lola. Frankie remembered feeling beyond angry and betrayed that day. But now Frankie felt like she would do anything for Lola and the baby. This was more than investment — it was  _ love.  _ And it was some of the purest love Frankie had ever felt. 

Frankie pulled Lola in for another tight hug and lingered for a moment. Out of the corner of their eyes they saw Esme and Miles re-emerging. Miles had a mountain of a variety of snacks nestled in his arms and Esme had a bottle of water in each hand. 

“One question real quick… you and Esme?” Lola asked before Esme and Miles entered earshot. 

“I’ll tell you later.” Frankie let out a small, tired laugh. “After I figure it out myself.” 

The two girls broke apart as Esme and Miles walked up. 

“They had peanut butter cookies, but I also saw a few other things I thought you might be in the mood for…” Miles unloaded the ridiculous amount of snacks he was carrying. He must have bought out half of the vending machine. 

“Perfect.” Lola smiled, exchanging a polite glance with Frankie and Esme, who had rejoined hands. “Feel free to grab a snack, guys. I may be pregnant, but I can’t eat this all by myself.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys for reading part 1 of this fic! We worked very hard since January to put this story together and it has been our comfort/safe zone through this crazy world. We will continue posting on every Tuesday and Friday, but there is a time skip/jump of about 2 months that will occur narratively in between part one and part 2! Please consider leaving feedback if you've enjoyed what we've been posting so far!!


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola is driven to her six month doctor's appointment by Mrs. Hollingsworth and Frankie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter takes place a couple months after where you saw our characters last! The appointment will continue in our next chapter which will be posted on Tuesday! Enjoy! ~

Lola steadied herself as she stepped out of her father’s car at the front doorstep of the Hollingsworth mansion. If she weren’t pregnant, she probably would have gotten her driver’s license by now. A  _ lot _ of normal teenage things were going to have to take a backseat now.  _ Just three long months to go _ , she thought. Lola was glad to have a good support system to the point where someone was always willing to give her a ride to where she needed to go — heck, even her mom, who lived over an hour away, had offered to drive her to appointments. But the fact that she was growing a tiny human inside her body yet couldn’t even drive herself to the doctor’s appointments made her feel a bit…childish. 

“Thanks, Dad. I’ll let you know how it goes.” Lola said before shutting the car door. 

She had a doctor’s appointment today -- this was her  _ six month _ appointment. She had vowed not to let any baby stuff interfere with school, so she had made her appointment on a Saturday morning. Unfortunately that meant her father was far too busy with the Cantina to do much more than give Lola a ride to the Hollingsworths’ so that Frankie could take her to the appointment. 

Lola was kind of glad her dad couldn’t make it to the appointment, though. The thought of her father seeing her bare belly, which now looked like a tiny melon stuck on Lola’s tiny, short frame, all covered in ultrasound goo wasn’t her idea of comfortable or fun. He had gotten a bit warmer on the whole idea of the baby over the past few months, but it would still be... _ weird _ . 

Lola walked up to the front door of the Hollingsworth house, knocking on the front door and waiting for someone to come open it up. She knew that Miles usually left the front door unlocked -- a bad habit. Lola never felt fully comfortable just barging into their house, though. Especially when Mrs. Hollingsworth was home. The last thing Lola wanted was for her baby’s future grandma to think she was rude. 

Frankie answered the door almost instantly. “You don’t have to knock, you know,” she laughed, ushering her best friend into the living room. “You’re basically family. I mean…technically you  _ are  _ family,” she added.

“...true,” Lola smiled slightly, tracing her fingers over the tight seam of her top. The baby was definitely no longer just a tiny pea-sized thing. According to the pregnancy app, they were growing little eyelashes and starting to pick up on sounds now. Lola had also been feeling these little twitches lately, like tiny flutters.  _ Like just now. _

“Do you feel this?” she grabbed Frankie’s hand and placed it on her stomach. Lola still couldn’t discern if these were actual baby kicks or just annoying gas bubbles or something. It was honestly frustrating. Shouldn’t she be able to recognize her own baby kicking? It just felt like another reminder that she really had no idea what she was getting into with this whole motherhood thing.

Frankie’s expression was blank. “Um…am I  _ supposed  _ to feel something?”

“Never mind,” Lola sighed. “Did Miles leave already? I wanna wish him good luck.”

Frankie shook her head. “You just missed him,” she said. “Also,  _ ew _ .”

Lola jabbed Frankie with her elbow. “That’s not what I meant!” 

“I know.” Frankie teased. “So look, I have something I need to tell you about the appointment today…”

“Good morning, Lola.” Mrs. Hollingsworth suddenly appeared in the foyer. Her ice blue eyes scanned Lola, stopping at her belly for a moment before retreating back up to Lola’s face and offering a polite- _ ish _ half smile. She was definitely still a bit uncomfortable with the concept of having a grandbaby, but she had come a long way since Lola and Miles first told her. “How are you feeling? Are you two about ready for me to drive you to the appointment?” 

Lola looked over to Frankie, who had her eyes glued to the floor, clearly knowing Lola would be a bit upset with her. The plan was for  _ Frankie  _ to drive Lola to the appointment, just the two of them. This was Lola’s first doctor’s appointment without Miles by her side — she was already nervous enough without having her boyfriend's mother tagging along too. “Umm…yeah?” Lola said, not really knowing what else to say. 

“Fantastic.” Mrs. Hollingsworth said. “Let me just grab my purse and then I’ll go start the car. There are muffins in the kitchen — please eat one before we go.” Mrs. Hollingsworth seemed to be demanding Lola eat something rather than just politely offering. She had eaten a sausage and egg frittata this morning, but muffins  _ did _ sound pretty good… 

Mrs. Hollingsworth left the room and Lola immediately yanked Frankie toward the kitchen. Lola’s first priority was to find the aforementioned muffins. Her second priority was to find out how and why Frankie had allowed her mother to tag along to this doctor’s appointment. 

“I can explain…” Frankie started. 

“Please do.” Lola said, her eyes landing on a big basket of muffins. She had no idea how or why whoever baked goods for the Hollingsworth house always made enough for an army every single time, but she wasn’t complaining. Plus, she was definitely taking a few home for later. “Do you know what flavor these are?” 

“Yellow wrappers are banana, blue wrappers are blueberry, red wrappers are strawberry.” Frankie rattled off the variety of flavors.  _ Man,  _ Lola loved the Hollingsworth house sometimes — even if only for the superior snack selections.

Lola’s hands reached into the basket and grabbed two muffins with red wrappers. Strawberry was always an easy choice. “One for now, one to go.” She spoke out loud, mostly to herself. “So, explain?” she said, unwrapping a muffin and taking a big bite. 

“She doesn’t trust me to take you on my own. She thinks I’m the worst driver in the world. Plus she’s  _ paying… _ ” Frankie said sheepishly. 

Okay, fair, she  _ was  _ paying for all of Lola’s doctor’s appointments. Lola’s father’s health insurance wasn’t great and there was no way Lola could afford the great care she was getting without Mrs. Hollingsworth’s help. But  _ still —  _ unexpectedly crashing one of Lola’s biggest appointments without warning wasn’t really cool. Lola took a breath and then took another bite of her muffin, trying to swallow her annoyance and quickly convince herself that Mrs. Hollingsworth was just trying to help. The last thing Lola needed was another thing weighing on her mind right now. 

“Fine.” Lola conceded, not honestly feeling like she had a choice. One of the downsides of not being eighteen yet was always at least slightly being at the mercy of your parents and the other adults in your life. After all, they _ knew best _ . “I got my muffins, let’s not keep our ride waiting.” 

…

Frankie couldn’t help but feel like she was in grade nine again, sitting in the backseat with Lola while her mother chauffeured them. 

“So, girls, uh…” Mrs. Hollingsworth broke the silence. “How’s school?” 

“It’s high school and she’s pregnant,” Frankie quickly responded. “She’s the most popular girl in school, obviously.” She knew her sarcasm wouldn’t be appreciated by her mother, but she couldn’t resist. 

“It’s…as good as it can be.” Lola said, not fully seeming to appreciate Frankie’s sarcasm either. The car ride was getting more than a little tense. If only her mother had just trusted her to drive Lola alone. 

Frankie’s mother seemed confused. “Well, as long as nobody is being too mean.” Her mother always meant well, but usually missed the mark. “And how are you and Miles?” 

Frankie wondered why her mother couldn’t take a hint and drive quietly. Her mother was never the queen of small talk. Frankie had zero idea why she was trying now. 

“Good, I guess?” Lola said. She really didn’t seem to be in the mood to make conversation. “I wish he could be here today, but I told him he’d be crazy to pass up this interview…” She’d never say this to Lola of course, but Frankie couldn’t help but think that bright yellow top she was wearing made her look like a balloon. Maybe Esme’s snarkiness was starting to rub off on her.

“You do realize there’s no way he’s  _ going _ ,” Frankie interjected. She didn’t understand why Lola was encouraging Miles to accept an interview from a university in  _ London _ when they had a baby on the way. Not to mention, Lola was a whole year behind Miles in school. 

“I know, that’s not the point,” Lola muttered, digging into her second strawberry muffin. She glanced at Mrs. Hollingsworth through the mirror. “Are you sure you and my dad are okay…payment wise? I don’t wanna totally impose.”

“You’re not  _ imposing _ , this is my grandchild and I have an obligation,” Frankie’s mother replied plainly. Somehow her mother could make even a baby sound like a business contract. “Speaking of, are you eating enough folic acid? Taking vitamins every morning? It’s  _ very  _ important near the end of your second trimester.”

Lola started to respond with a mouth full of muffin. “Umm..” She held her hand in front of her mouth to block crumbs from coming out. “My dad has all that stuff figured out. He’s been making me these special smoothies and giving me some natural supplements. He told me what they were, but I forgot...” 

“Oh.” Frankie’s mother seemed slightly dissatisfied with that answer. Frankie noticed that her mother’s eyes were darting back and forth between the road and her rearview mirror, where she was keeping an eye on Lola. “Remember to drink some of that water bottle. Hydration becomes more and more important as your baby develops. I felt like I was drinking ten gallons a day when I was pregnant with the twins.” Frankie’s mother let out a small, almost friendly laugh. 

Frankie looked over to Lola and noticed that she was shifting in her seat. She looked a bit uncomfortable and irritated. Either that or she just needed to pee. Frankie guessed Lola being annoyed was understandable, but she was usually a bit better at putting on a polite facade. 

“Will do,” Lola said, uncapping the water bottle that she had been holding between her knees and taking a long sip to prove a point. Just as she took the bottle away from her mouth and went to replace the cap, Mrs. Hollingsworth hit a giant pothole. “Oh my — !” Lola gasped and jumped, accidentally pouring almost half the bottle all over her lap and the backseat. 

Mrs. Hollingsworth tapped the brakes quickly. “Lola!” she exclaimed before putting on her turn signal, preparing to pull over to the side of the road. Frankie couldn’t quite discern her mother’s tone. Was she concerned? Angry? 

“I’m sorry about the seats!” Lola apologized immediately, her cheeks turning a light shade of pink from embarrassment. Her hands touched her yellow shirt and white pants, now covered in patches of spilled water. “Ay dios mio…”

Now that the car was safely pulled over to the side of the road, Frankie’s mother put it in park and turned around fully to check on Lola and Frankie. “Are you two okay? Oh, Lola, your  _ pants… _ ” She looked apologetic. “I think I’ve got an extra pair of yoga pants in the trunk. But I doubt they’d fit you...” 

Frankie watched as Lola’s expression turned from polite and apologetic to downright cold. Frankie knew her mother meant well and she wasn’t  _ wrong _ , but it was obvious that comment definitely struck a nerve. “We should probably just get to my appointment. I don’t wanna be late,” Lola shot back.

Frankie’s mother didn’t push further. “As long as you’re both okay,” she said, turning around and preparing to continue the drive. 

Frankie looked over at Lola, who was dabbing at the wet spots on her pants with a wad of napkins that she had pulled from her purse. Maybe it was best if the rest of this car ride was silent… 

…

Lola shuffled into the doctor’s office, soaking wet and grumpy. “Hmmph!” she snarked quietly to Frankie. Mrs. Hollingsworth was a few feet ahead of them, and hopefully out of ear shot. “Like everyone wasn’t  _ already  _ going to be staring at the pregnant teenager with blue hair. Now I look like I wet my pants too. Why couldn’t you have just driven me? I bet  _ you  _ wouldn’t have hit that pothole.”

Frankie laughed slightly. “What, you think my mom hit it on purpose?”

“...maybe,” Lola mumbled, half-serious. She blotted her hopelessly soaked shirt with another napkin and watched as Mrs. Hollingsworth took it upon herself to sign them in at the front desk. “Plus, did you hear what she said about her yoga pants being too tight on me? She might as well have called me fat,” she whispered to Frankie.

“Okay, you’re officially being ridiculous now,” Frankie rolled her eyes. “Lo, you’re  _ pregnant _ . Of course her yoga pants won’t fit you.” She reached for her water bottle and took a sip. “And yeah, my mom can be annoying. But at least she’s…trying to help? In her own way.”

Lola knew Frankie had a point. She knew she was being a bit dramatic, but it was hard to calm herself down lately once she got worked up. She wanted things to go perfectly, and they just  _ weren’t  _ today. “I miss Miles,” she admitted.

“He was willing to come today.” Frankie said. It was true. Miles had made it more than clear that he was willing to cancel his plans for Lola’s appointment, but Lola had insisted. “If you wanted him here, I don’t know why you pushed him away.” 

Lola and Frankie caught up with Mrs. Hollingsworth, which caused their conversation to temporarily cease. “Lola Pacini, eleven o’clock.” Mrs. Hollingsworth said to the receptionist, pointing to Lola to identify who was there for the appointment — as if the tiny basketball under Lola’s shirt weren’t a clue-in to who would be here for an appointment. 

The receptionist typed furiously, then looked back up to Mrs. Hollingsworth. “Could I get your insurance information, please?” The question was directed toward Lola, but Mrs. Hollingsworth cut in first. 

“I’ll handle that,” Mrs. Hollingsworth said quickly. 

There was more typing from the receptionist before a response. “Alright, I’ll just need you to come back real quickly to confirm your payment and insurance info. That cool, hon?” 

Mrs. Hollingsworth nodded. “You two stay put in the waiting room, okay?” 

Lola and Frankie nodded in agreeance and sat down, allowing Frankie’s mother to disappear. The pair of friends just sat there in silence for a minute, having left their conversation off on a bit of an awkward note. Frankie turned to her phone, probably busy texting Esme. Lola just let her mind wander for a moment as she felt another one of those strange flutters, thinking about tiny little baby feet and wondering how Miles’ interview was going.

A nurse poked her head through the door. “Lola Pacini? Come on back, miss.” Lola smiled politely at the nurse and steadied herself to get out of her chair, a task that was becoming more and more difficult by the day. 

Frankie reached for Lola’s arm. “Shouldn’t we wait for my mom?” she reminded her.

Lola knew they probably  _ should  _ wait for Frankie’s mother, but in all honesty, she just wanted to get to the ultrasound already. And if she didn’t want her own father seeing her bare stomach, she definitely didn’t want her boyfriend’s mother to hover over her for the whole thing. “Nah… she’ll find us when she’s done with the insurance stuff,” Lola reasoned quickly. “Erhm, but first, can you help me out of my chair?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading our story! We always appreciate kudos, comments and hits on our story! If you like it, please consider sharing this fic with a friend and supporting us! :] -Eevee


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola has her six month ultrasound and finds common ground with Mrs. Hollingsworth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is one of my personal faves. So fluffy and sweet. Enjoy guys!   
> ♡ - Eevee

“Now, put your wrist through here and wait for a squeeze…”

Lola sat up straight on the exam table while the nurse took her blood pressure. These visits were starting to feel a little less intimidating, but it was still  _ nerve-wrecking.  _ She felt like she was taking the world’s hardest class and every doctor’s appointment was an exam. One that she wasn’t sure she was passing.

“Hmm…” the nurse muttered as she read the numbers, and Lola’s heart sped up with nervousness. “...good. Normal range. Although, you  _ are _ a couple of weeks overdue for a checkup. We like to see our patients frequently.”

“I know, I’m sorry,” Lola said apologetically. She glanced over at Frankie, who was sitting in a nearby chair, still glued to her phone. “It’s just…school, and work, and everything. It’s been busy.”

“Oh, hon. If you think you think you’re busy  _ now _ , just wait til the baby’s here,” the nurse said, and cracked a smile. Lola couldn’t tell if she was being friendly or judgy. That was the case with most of her interactions these days. “Mkay, your numbers look fine. Lay down and the doctor will be here in a minute for your ultrasound, alright?” She took her clipboard and disappeared into the hallway, leaving just Lola and Frankie again.

Frankie finally put her phone down. “Still missing Miles?” she asked, slightly mockingly.

“Yes,” Lola grunted, shifting to lie down on the table and feeling the water from the car still soaking through the fabric of her top. She wondered what the baby was thinking right now, feeling more and more antsy to just see them on that ultrasound screen again and confirm they were safe and healthy and that she wasn’t totally messing this up. 

“So…why  _ didn’t _ you tell Miles to come today?” Frankie probed, though now her tone sounded more genuinely curious than nosy. “I mean, you said you  _ know _ he won’t go to London. So why tell him to take the interview?”

When Miles first told Lola a recruiter from London Writer’s Academy was interested in him, she was honestly a bit freaked. She was proud of him of course, but she’d be lying if she said it didn’t bring back her fear of abandonment in full force. Miles had of course assured her that he would never leave her and the baby, and that he wasn’t even interested in the first place. But Lola could see it in his eyes when he talked about writing, how the play had helped him through everything, how he would write short stories to blow off steam about his dad, how it made him feel like he was good at something for once in his life. And…Lola wanted Miles to have that. She wanted him to know how talented and special he was, that he  _ deserved _ this opportunity even if he couldn’t take it. So, she’d told him to go to the interview instead of her appointment today. “I wanted him to know he’s good enough,” Lola explained to Frankie. “I feel like he’s giving up so much for me and the baby. I just want him to feel special still. He deserves it.”

“That’s…kinda sweet, actually,” Frankie said. She’d definitely come a long way since the day she found out about Lola and Miles. “I wish I could make Esme feel like that too. She acts like getting into Ivy Leagues is a freakin’ participation trophy. Like she doesn’t deserve to be proud of herself or something. Especially ever since she and Zig broke up…”

“Are you two like,  _ dating  _ now?” Lola questioned. There was a lot she was curious to know about Frankie and Esme, but Frankie never seemed to open up to her and Shay all the way when it came to this topic. Either that, or Frankie was still trying to figure it out herself. 

Before Frankie could even muster a reply, the doctor came in. “Good morning, Lola,” the doctor said, a lot warmer than the nurse from a minute ago. “My, my, six months already…how are you feeling?"

“Umm…exhausted?” Lola said honestly, letting out a light chuckle. “But I’m fine. Just the usual heartburn and aches. Is there anything you can do about these varicose veins on my ankles, though? They’re  _ really  _ clashing with my shoes.”

“Ahh, I’m afraid you’ll have to wait until you deliver for that,” the doctor responded plainly. She glanced  _ hello _ at Frankie and took note of the empty seat next to her. Lola hoped she wasn’t thinking Miles’ absence meant he didn’t want to be here. He’d been by her side every appointment so far, and he’d actually had  _ so _ many questions for the doctors that Lola had contemplated kicking him out of the room once. “Now, are you ready to see your baby?”

“ _ Yes _ ,” Frankie responded before Lola could even open her mouth. She had her oomfchat camera ready and everything. This was Frankie’s first time being here since that very first ultrasound, back when the baby was just a little strawberry. Again, she really had come a long way on this whole Miles-Lola baby thing.

“Definitely,” Lola added with a chuckle, and pulled up her shirt. She shared a warm glance with her best friend as the doctor squirted gel on her belly and set up the machine, feeling less anxious now. Maybe Miles couldn’t be here, but at least she had one Hollingsworth sibling by her side today— and Lola  _ definitely  _ preferred it be Frankie over Hunter. 

Frankie’s phone camera shutter was the only sound in the room as the doctor finished setting up the ultrasound machine. “I’m just snapping a few quick pics of your belly for Miles. I can’t believe it’s getting so big…” 

“You know,” the doctor started. “Technically you could find out today which sex  _ it _ is…your baby, I mean. That was always my favorite part...” Lola’s doctor seemed to pause and reminisce. During Lola’s second appointment her doctor had taken the time to show off the photos of all seven of her children. That was one of the things that made Lola trust her doctor more — clearly after having that many kids, the doctor knew what the heck she was doing. 

“Um…” Lola paused to think. She and Miles had talked about this a couple weeks ago, but they hadn’t come to a final decision on whether or not they wanted to know the baby’s sex. “I definitely don’t want to find out without Miles here. Is there any way that you would like, write it down so we could look at it later?” Lola was pretty sure she had seen that done in a half-dozen movies and sitcoms. 

Lola knew that there was a possibility that if she looked too closely at what the ultrasound captured today that she could accidentally spoil the surprise for herself — if she could even figure out what she was looking at. She made a mental note not to look  _ too  _ hard. She didn’t want Miles to miss any more important moments of her pregnancy. She knew she would love this baby no matter what, though — boy, girl, anything. As long as they were happy and healthy. That was all that mattered.

“Sure.” The doctor said, nodding quickly before officially placing the transducer on Lola’s bump. “Are you ready to see your baby?”

“Ready!” Lola and Frankie both said at the same time before exchanging a glance and a giggle. 

Lola was really glad to have a best friend like Frankie. The fact that her best friend also got to be her child’s aunt was a blessing she could’ve never expected. This new familial link added a sense of  _ permanence  _ to her relationship with Frankie. Like now, no matter what they went through, their bond ran too deep to drift apart or throw one another away. 

…

“Ohmigod, Franks! Look at the little feet!”

Frankie stared at the ultrasound, feeling like she was watching the world’s strangest movie. This was really her niece or nephew on that screen, half her brother and half her best friend. The baby had grown  _ so  _ much since that first ultrasound when Frankie had to humor them and pretend she saw anything but a tiny blob. Now there was like, a whole tiny _ human  _ inside Lola. It was equal parts exciting and freaky, to be honest. “I can’t believe how  _ big  _ it is now,” Frankie said. “No wonder you’re getting huge,” she added to Lola teasingly.

Lola rolled her eyes at her friend, then glued her eyes back on the screen. “I think it looks like Miles,” she said dreamily.  _ It looks like E.T. _ , Frankie thought, but didn’t say. She knew her little niece or nephew was going to be absolutely adorable, though. They just needed some more time to cook first.

The doctor moved the transducer over Lola’s belly. “There’s the head,” she said. “The arms…”

Lola was totally mesmerized. Frankie knew her friend was scared about becoming a mother, but she could also see it in her eyes just how much she loved her baby already. “Oh! I think it’s sucking its thumb!” Lola gushed, pointing to the screen. 

Frankie pulled her cell phone back out to take an Oomfchat video. “Miles is  _ definitely _ gonna wanna see this.”

The doctor cleared her throat. “Well, baby looks like they’re in tip-top shape,” she smiled. “Have you been feeling kicks yet? You should be at this point.”

Lola’s expression suddenly shifted. “Umm…” she said, her eyes darting back and forth between the ultrasound and her bump. “I’m not sure? I’ve been feeling these like, little flutters. But I don’t know what I’m supposed to be feeling. I thought I’d know right away when they kicked…” Lola’s voice trailed off and she sounded worried and discouraged, like she’d just been called on in Perino’s class to answer a question about a chapter she hadn’t read.

“That’s normal, just keep an eye out for it,” the doctor tried to reassure her, and she didn’t seem all that concerned. She stared pointedly at the screen. “Now…you still want me to just write down the sex? I can tell what it is.” 

Everything in Frankie was screaming for her to convince Lola to find out right this second. The anticipation was killing her. Besides, she and Esme had a bet. But Frankie knew it had to be Lola’s call, and that Lola certainly wouldn’t want to find out without Miles here. “You can write it down and give it to me,” she offered. “I’ll hang onto it until they’re ready. I won’t peek Lo, I promise.”

Lola made a face, doubtful of Frankie’s ability not to snoop. “Since when can you keep a secret?” 

“I kept this baby a secret, didn’t I?” Frankie shot back. She had technically blabbed to Esme that one time, but whatever. She’d still kept the biggest secret of her life for weeks.

“Okay, fair point,” Lola giggled. “Yeah, can you write it down, please?” she added to the doctor. 

“Mhmm, no problem, honey,” the doctor said, already scribbling down on a little note. She folded it up and taped it shut, then handed it to Frankie. Two seconds and it was already insanely difficult for Frankie to not peek. She thought back to that Christmas when she was eight and Miles found all of “Santa’s” presents hidden under the bed, already wrapped. She’d opened one of the gifts right away, then immediately regretted ruining the surprise for herself. 

Frankie’s phone buzzed just then, lighting up with a text from Esme.  _ Wanna hang after your Hollingspawn appt? I feel like swimming. _

Frankie thought back to Lola’s question:  _ “Are you guys like, dating now?”  _ Frankie hadn’t answered that, partly because they’d been interrupted, but also partly because…Frankie didn’t  _ know.  _ She wasn’t sure what they were doing. They’d hung out constantly these past few months, especially since the Zig breakup. And they seemed…closer than other friends. Flirty, even. But Frankie didn’t know what any of that actually  _ meant _ . They hadn’t even discussed the kiss since that night on the roof. Maybe because that night had been traumatic as hell with Maya…but also, what if Esme didn’t  _ want  _ to discuss it? What if it didn’t mean anything? Frankie sure as hell didn’t know what it meant. She didn’t even know for sure if she liked girls in that way. But… it felt different hanging with Esme than it did with Lola or Shay. It felt more like how she used to feel with Winston and Jonah in the very beginning. Everything was just a bit… _ confusing _ . Frankie didn’t know what to think. She texted back,  _ Maybe, I’ll let you know _ . 

“Alright, everything looks a-okay, Ms. Lola. Any questions before we wrap this up?” 

Lola’s eyes were still glued to the ultrasound, a bit teary-eyed as she looked at the baby. She grabbed Frankie’s arm. “Can you go get your mom? I know I said I didn’t want her tagging along, but…I think she should see this.” 

Frankie had almost forgotten that her mother had tagged along to the doctor’s office. “Sure, I’ll go find her. She's probably done with the payment stuff now.” Frankie said before disappearing out into the hallway to search for her mother.

…

Lola let out a large sigh before looking over to the ultrasound image again. She couldn’t believe her eyes. That was  _ her  _ baby. A real, growing human who would exit her body and breathe and eat and poop and cry in less than four months. 

“Does this ever stop being slightly terrifying?” Lola went to rub her stomach instinctively but her fingers got caught in the ultrasound goo that was still spread over her bump. “Like...am I ever gonna feel like I’m ready to be a mom?”

“Let me grab something to clean you up really quickly, sorry for the stickiness.” The doctor apologized. “And to answer your questions...yes and no.” Lola appreciated her doctor’s honesty, but she was definitely going to prod for more information. 

“What do you mean?” Lola questioned as the doctor assisted in cleaning the goo off of her stomach.

“Becoming a parent is always scary — especially when you’re so young…sixteen, right?” The doctor looked for confirmation and Lola nodded. “Yeah. You’re doing fantastic, all things considered.” 

Lola raised a brow. “I am?” 

“You seem to have a great support system, which is more rare than I can even begin to explain. You’re a healthy young woman, your baby is developing perfectly…all things considered, you’re very lucky, Miss Pacini. Not all teen moms have so much help, opportunity, or hope in their lives.”  _ Hope.  _ That word stuck with Lola for a moment for obvious Miles-related reasons. She had been his source of hope when he needed it and now he was returning the favor tenfold by being by her side through all of this. 

“You’re right.” Lola smiled, placing her hand on her bump and suddenly feeling extremely lucky and blessed. It was easy to forget how lucky she was in the heat of the moment sometimes. 

Lola’s doctor had just begun the process of printing the ultrasound captures when Frankie and Mrs. Hollingsworth emerged in the doorway. 

“Is everything okay?” Mrs. Hollingsworth asked, her gaze being pulled to Lola’s bare stomach almost immediately. It was clear by her expression that she was shocked at how much Lola’s bump had grown. Lola quickly pulled her shirt back down, suddenly self-conscious again.

“Everything is great.” Lola’s doctor cut in. “Lola is carrying the healthiest and most beautiful baby I’ve seen all day.” 

“I’m your first appointment of the day, aren’t I?” Lola giggled, a light blush appearing across her cheeks. 

Lola’s doctor nodded and laughed. “Doesn’t mean it’s not true. I’ll give you three a few minutes alone,” she said, handing Lola the printed ultrasound images before exiting the room and shutting the door behind her. Having a doctor who made her feel at ease definitely made this whole pregnancy thing a lot less intimidating for Lola.

Lola observed the photos closely for a minute, taking in the beautiful images of her baby from every angle for a moment before sharing them with Frankie and Mrs. Hollingsworth. She very slowly sat up, then handed the photos to Mrs. Hollingsworth. “So…this is your grandbaby,” she said, and actually tried to make an effort to smile genuinely. Maybe things weren’t  _ perfect _ , but her doctor was right that she was incredibly lucky to have a support system like this.

Mrs. Hollingsworth’s eyes widened as she looked at the pictures. She seemed like she was truly processing everything for the first time, like she was either about to smile or burst into tears. Her expression was impossible to read, a mixture of overwhelmed, excited, and scared. Lola could honestly relate. But then Mrs. Hollingsworth smiled. “The baby’s  _ beautiful _ , Lola.”

Frankie snapped a few pics on her phone. “How could they not be? They clearly won the genetic lottery.”

Lola laughed, finally feeling at ease. Maybe today wasn’t a total disaster. There would be bumps in the road, but they’d make it through. She placed her hand over her stomach, feeling a fluttering sensation again. Only this time it felt sharper, more distinct. Without thinking much, she reached for Mrs. Hollingsworth’s hand and placed it on her bump. “Do you…feel this?”

“Oh my...” Mrs. Hollingsworth said, and paused for a moment. She looked up at Lola, and her expression softened. “It’s  _ kicking. _ ”


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frankie opens up to Miles a bit about her current situation with Esme. Miles reveals that his London Writer's Academy spot was a diversity spot and the siblings get into a discussion regarding defining your sexuality versus feeling like your identity defines you.

Frankie had been waiting in the kitchen impatiently for almost an hour prior to returning home from Lola’s doctor’s appointment. Miles was due home any moment and she was excited to show him the photos from the appointment as well as hear about his meeting regarding the London Writer’s Academy. 

Her phone lit up. Another Oomfchat from Esme. Frankie hesitated for a moment before opening it. She never knew what to expect when opening a message from Esme. Most of the time it was innocent. A selfie, a funny meme, a cute dog Esme saw on the street… but occasionally Esme got a bit…  _ revealing.  _ Frankie didn’t necessarily  _ mind  _ but she did wonder what Esme sending her risqué Oomfchats  _ meant _ . 

The two girls didn’t really talk about it when they hung out — it was just… a thing that happened. Continuously. Sometimes back and forth. It started with Esme sending a few bikini pics and asking Frankie which she liked best and escalated from there to say the least. Frankie always responded positively, because… well, she kind of liked it, whether she knew exactly what that meant or not. Frankie also figured her friend could use a little extra validation after breaking things off with Zig. Not to mention Esme  _ really _ knew her angles. 

Frankie held her finger about an inch away from her screen, hesitant to open up Esme’s chat in the middle of her family’s kitchen. She finally gave into temptation, clicking to open what Esme had sent. It was Esme, standing and smiling in the mirror in a lacy white bikini top and shorts. Not the  _ most _ explicit thing Esme had ever sent, but it still made Frankie’s heart race a bit. She couldn’t help but stare for a moment…

“Is _ ‘Degrassi Nudes’ _ back?” Miles scoffed from behind Frankie, causing Frankie to nearly jump out of her skin and toss her phone down. “Esme was always quite the Oomfchat photographer... _ do not  _ tell Lola I said that.”

“So gross, brother.” Frankie was so uncomfortable. From her brother walking in on her opening a sexy picture to that sexy picture being from a girl Frankie knew he had... _ associated _ with, the whole situation was just  _ icky.  _

“I’m just kidding,” Miles said. “I mean, I  _ do  _ remember getting those pics from Esme, but…no judgment, whatever you’re doing. I mean, slight judgment for  _ who  _ you’re doing it with, but…anyways. Winston and I send junk pics to each other all the time.”

Frankie paused. “You guys do…what?” She knew her brother and her ex-boyfriend had a weird relationship, but this piece of information took the cake. 

“Not like, sexually,” Miles clarified.  _ Still weird,  _ Frankie thought but didn’t say. “It’s like...an inside joke.”

The pictures sent between Frankie and Esme definitely weren’t just inside jokes -- but what  _ did _ they mean? Frankie pondered for a second before remembering that her brother was right there.

“How was your meeting?” Frankie asked, changing the subject.

Miles rolled his eyes slightly but quickly conceded -- not prodding Frankie for more information. “Uh...it was…” His hesitance made Frankie start to think it went poorly. That was  _ not _ what she was expecting. 

“What happened?” Frankie questioned flatly. 

“It was fine until I realized that the only reason Mr. Mitchell even put me up for the London Writer’s Academy thing was because I’m…well, because of  _ Tristan _ .” 

Frankie cocked her head to the side slightly. “Like he felt bad about the bus crash…?” She wasn’t able to easily discern what her brother meant. 

“No, like…because I like guys.” 

“But you don’t  _ just _ like guys.” Frankie said quickly. “I mean, you have a pregnant girlfriend after all.” 

“The interviewer kept going on about how  _ unique _ my perspective is because of my  _ bisexuality _ . Like everything I’ve done and everything I am just boils down to who I may or may not go to bed with.” Miles’ tone was sounding increasingly more upset. Frankie was starting to think that her brother had taken a good amount of time attempting to cool down before coming home. This conversation, however, was clearly bringing his frustration right back up. “I just…thought I  _ earned _ this opportunity. Like, I even bragged to Dad about it. Even if I couldn’t take it because of the baby and Lola and everything, I kinda liked the idea that Mr. Mitchell and everyone else thought I was a good writer just because of  _ me _ \-- not what I’ve been through or who I’ve dated.” 

Frankie thought for a second. “I’m sorry…” She wished that she was better at knowing just the right thing to say. “I guess I have a question…”

“Yeah?” Miles focused his gaze on the kitchen counter. 

“Do you feel like your sexuality defines you -- like...as a human person?” Frankie was asking partially because she wanted to know his perspective on himself, but partially because...honestly, she was really confused about herself and her own identity. When Miles first started expressing that he liked both boys and girls, Frankie really didn’t understand how that worked. Like her father, part of Frankie wondered at first if it was just a phase or something Miles was doing for attention. Miles’ outward exploration of his sexuality  _ had _ come around the exact same time that he was lashing out against his father. She understood being gay or straight, but liking  _ both _ ? Frankie couldn’t fully comprehend how that was possible. That was, until  _ Esme  _ came into her life and kissed her…then made Frankie unable to stop thinking about kissing her… 

“Are you asking for me or for you, Franks?” Miles picked up on Frankie’s non-subtlety quickly. 

Frankie blushed. “Both, maybe? I don’t know...” Even though she knew Miles wouldn’t judge, Frankie was still apprehensive to open up about this -- especially since her thoughts were still so jumbled.

“Well… it’s definitely a huge part of me and my history, but… it’s not  _ me _ .” Miles said. “This is about more than my London Writer’s Academy stuff -- isn’t it?” Frankie’s brother was way too perceptive. 

“Did you open my Oomfchats?” Frankie asked, trying to quickly change the subject. She wanted to talk about Esme, but…maybe not right this second. “I sent you a ton of stuff from Lola’s appointment.” 

Miles smirked, clearly noting that Frankie was avoiding the topic of Esme. “Lola sent me the motherload when she got home but I haven’t gotten a chance to open it. Wanna check the pictures out together before we continue this conversation?” 

Frankie nodded, pulling her phone up and opening the camera roll. “Let’s start with the pictures in the waiting room…” She began showing a chronological gallery of photos, every step of Lola’s appointment completely documented. Miles watched as Frankie swiped through the pictures, gasping and smiling as the appointment progressed and things got more exciting and intimate. The moment he saw the ultrasound photos he stopped in his tracks. 

“There’s no way our baby is  _ that _ big.” Miles said, grabbing Frankie’s phone and getting a closer look. “That has… _ thumbs _ . And a  _ face. _ ” He was completely dumbfounded. Frankie was too as she looked back over at the photo. It was pretty unbelievable that Lola had this tiny mostly-developed human inside of her. She wasn’t far off from the point where her baby could technically survive outside of the womb.  _ Six whole months  _ along  _ \-- _ it was hard for Frankie to conceptualize sometimes. Six whole months since Lola and Miles had slept together and started this whole thing. Only half a year since everything had changed forever. 

“That’s definitely your baby. You’ve  _ seen _ Lola’s belly lately, right?” Frankie joked. “She’s gonna have a full-sized watermelon strapped to her torso by prom.” 

“Yeah…” Miles responded, his eyes still focused on the ultrasound photo. “I still can’t believe this is happening…this is  _ mine… _ ” 

Frankie smiled for a moment watching her brother fawn over the photo of his unborn baby. “You should’ve seen Mom’s reaction.”

Miles was slightly taken aback. “Mom was in the room? And she was…nice?” 

“It surprised me too. She got all teary-eyed. I think she’s really  _ trying _ with Lola,” Frankie said. “She even helped Lola feel the baby kick for the first time.” 

Miles froze. “Wait. Our baby  _ kicked _ ?” his jaw dropped, a mixture of excitement and disappointment spread across his face. “I can’t believe I missed it…” 

Frankie felt a pang of guilt for bragging about the events of Lola’s doctor’s appointment since her brother couldn’t be there. She knew Miles was hesitant to miss it in the first place. “Yeah, just a little bit…” She wished she could walk her statements back sometimes. “I’m sure you can feel the baby kick Monday at school.” 

Miles still seemed down. “I just don’t want to miss any more important stuff with the baby. Especially not for another interview like  _ that _ .” He sighed, eyes still glued to the ultrasound pics. “You guys didn’t find out the sex without me, right?”

Frankie shook her head. “Nope. Lola said you guys still haven’t decided if you want to know, so she had the doctor just write it down for us…” She reached into her pocket for the little piece of paper and handed it to her brother.

But Miles handed it back. “You hang onto this for us,” he said, and Frankie felt kind of honored. “Just…keep it somewhere safe. And don’t peek, yeah?”

“Yeah, okay. Sure.” Frankie slipped the note back into her pocket. Her phone went off with another text from Esme just then. “Well, uh, Esme wants to come over so we can go swimming, so...” She turned to make an awkward exit. Miles hadn’t been  _ rude _ or anything to Esme, but he had also made it pretty clear he didn’t like her hanging out at their house all the time. Frankie figured he lost the right to have an opinion after he impregnated her best friend under this roof at  _ her  _ sleepover.

Miles set a hand on her shoulder. “Hey, Franks?” he said, and somehow Frankie knew he was still thinking about the question she’d asked him. “You know you can talk to me about…whatever, right? I mean it.”

Frankie smiled, but didn’t hop on the opportunity to open up more. She had to figure this Esme stuff out on her own first. But she did appreciate knowing that Miles was here to listen. There were some benefits to growing up with a sibling who had done everything before her. “I know. Thanks, big bro,” she said, and smiled back at him as she turned towards the stairs. Now all she had to do was find her cutest bikini and she was set...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really, really loved this chance to sort of delve into Frankie's inner struggle when it comes to defining and understanding what she's going through when questioning her sexuality. I hope you guys enjoy too! Please don't hesitate to leave a comment or review. We appreciate your opinions, love and feedback! <3


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Miles updates Lola on what happened at his London Writer’s Academy meeting. Degrassi students pair up for a robo-baby assignment in Home Economics class.

Lola had almost grown accustomed to the stares she received from her peers in the Degrassi hallways. _Almost_ \-- until her eyes met a pair of all-too-familiar judging eyes… _Tristan_. Miles had told her that he would be returning in the next week or so but Lola was still caught by surprise when she nearly collided with Tristan’s walker on the way to Home Economics class. 

“Hey, Lola…” Tristan spoke. His quick wit and sassy demeanor had been replaced with a much slower drawl. Miles wasn’t kidding when he said that everything had changed for Tristan. Lola hadn’t exactly visited him in the hospital when he woke up, so this was the first time she was truly seeing it for herself. “You look...round.” 

Zoe, who seemed to have taken over the responsibility of ushering Tristan from class-to-class, quickly blushed and attempted to apologize on his behalf. “He didn’t mean…he just meant...this is the first time he’s seeing you...like _this._ ” Zoe motioned to Lola’s baby bump. “You know…uh, _pregnant._ ” The words were much less foreign than the first time Lola told Zoe, but it was still clearly an uncomfortable conversation for Zoe to breach. 

Lola wasn’t sure what it was about teenage pregnancy that made everyone completely incapable of saying normal things. Adults and teenagers alike seemed to have their brains turn to mush the second the topic of Lola’s pregnancy came up. It was literal kryptonite to _everybody._ “It’s okay,” Lola started, looking at Zoe and then Tristan, trying to muster the kindest face she could put on. “I know, I’m getting huge.” At the very least she could _try_ to act friendly and joke around, even if Tristan was just about the last person at Degrassi she wanted to continue to converse with. 

Tristan just sort of gave Lola a blank stare. Lola wondered if his brain wanted to say something snarky but his mouth just wasn’t cooperating. “Good luck.” He finally said after a few moments of silence. “Hope you guys are happy.” 

Lola couldn’t quite discern Tristan’s true intent or feelings behind that statement, whether it was sarcasm or genuineness. Everything he said sort of lacked emotion and affectation. He was just sort of… neutral. This Tristan was honestly more intimidating than the catty persona the boy put on before the bus crash. For someone who usually prided herself on being able to feel out peoples’ vibes efficiently, Lola was feeling pretty clueless here. “Uh…thanks.” Lola said, allowing Zoe to lead Tristan away without much more than a glance that said _‘I’m sorry for the awkwardness.’_

“That went about as well as it could have…” Lola said to nobody in particular, sort of just glad to have escaped the encounter unscathed. 

“Please tell me you weren’t just talking to Tristan.” Miles’ voice broke through from the hallway chatter from behind Lola. “I know that’s a stupid request considering I just saw him walking away from you....” His hands met his forehead, full of concern and nerves. “How bad was it?”

Lola turned around and looked up at her handsome boyfriend for a moment before speaking. “Hello to you too.” She greeted Miles with a hug which he accepted graciously. “It was fine. _Awkward,_ but I don’t really know if Tristan is capable of being like, _that_ pissed right now...” 

“Oh, trust me. You didn’t hear him after he watched your vlog and put two and two together about your pregnancy.” Miles said, placing a light kiss on Lola’s forehead through her blue bangs before offering to take Lola’s bag off of her shoulder. Lola obliged without a fight. “Zoe took one for the team and handled the worst of Tris’s anger, but…she gave me the highlights and he _definitely_ wasn’t happy for us.” Miles seemed to take a moment to recall the unpleasant memory. 

Lola attempted to recount the moments prior but stress was beginning to cloud her memory. _What exactly did Tristan’s tone sound like again?_ “I dunno. I just hope Tristan doesn’t hate me…” 

“If he does, it sucks, but you really can’t control that.” Miles attempted to reassure Lola but she wasn’t feeling fully comforted. She wasn’t really the type of person who could just _ignore_ someone hating her. Whether it was rational or not, Lola wanted everyone to like her. “I learned a long time ago that people are gonna think what they want to think. If those thoughts are judgmental, all you can do is try to stop yourself from caring, because they’re never gonna stop judging.” 

Lola took Miles’ words as an opportunity to spin the subject away from his ex-boyfriend. “Speaking of judging… _sort of…_ ” She laced her fingers with Miles’ and held his hand as they began walking down the hall toward her Home Economics class, which was taught by Mr. Mitchell. “How was your interview? You were kinda vague over text…” Vague was an understatement. Miles had responded ecstatically about the ultrasound and updates from Lola’s doctor, but other than that, Lola’s texts about his London Writer’s Academy meeting had been met with radio silence. Frankie had warned Lola that Miles seemed a bit moody when he came home but Lola had wanted to give her boyfriend a chance to bring things up organically before she started probing him for info. She didn’t want to be _that_ kind of girl -- after all.

Miles took a deep breath before looking at Lola. “Honestly… _not great_.” 

Lola pulled Miles aside, leaning against a set of neon lockers. They had at least a few minutes before the bell rang and she wanted more answers from him -- pronto. “Tell me what happened.” Lola said, then quickly added a bit of reassurance, “Whatever happened, it’s okay.” 

“It was a diversity spot. Mr. Mitchell only considered me because…” Miles paused for a moment, seeming hesitant to finish his sentence. “Because I’m bisexual. You know, because I dated Tristan.” 

“Being with Tristan speaks to your identity just as much as dating me or any other girl you’ve dated in the past...” Lola said sincerely. “One of your exes being a boy isn’t the one thing that validates your bisexuality. You know that…right?” 

Miles raised a brow. Clearly he wasn’t completely sure what Lola meant.

“I just mean like, I don’t know everything about how bisexuality works but…the _bi_ means _more than one,_ right?” Lola asked, and Miles shook his head yes. “So then you dating Tristan makes you just as bisexual as you dating me, doesn’t it?” 

“I guess I never thought of it like that. Tristan always made me feel like I had to choose a side. He didn’t exactly like that I was into girls too.”

Lola raised her eyebrow, suddenly feeling herself slip into protective girlfriend mode. She remembered Miles telling her a while back that Tristan wasn’t exactly accepting of his bisexuality, but she’d never pressed him for details. It didn’t make any sense to her — how could you _disagree_ with someone’s sexuality? Especially when you claimed to love that someone? Maybe Lola had worried a bit about Miles going back to Tristan in the beginning, but she’d never once felt threatened just because he was attracted to guys too. “What do you mean?” she questioned.

Miles sighed, pressing his palm to his temple. “Like…he wanted to be the only person I’d ever cared about. He saw the girls I’d dated before him as like, a stupid phase or a stepping stone to admitting I was gay or something. He told me I needed to _decide_ if I liked boys or girls.” He scoffed a little under his breath, like he was finally allowing himself to acknowledge how messed up it was. “I dunno if he ever really liked me for _me_ . He never wanted to actually talk about real stuff or listen to me. He just wanted me to stand next to him and look pretty so he could show me off -- like I was some _prize_ that he won.” Miles seemed to be getting slightly worked up. “As long as I kept my mouth shut and didn’t make things too _complicated…_ ” 

“You deserve way better than that.” Lola said, stepping closer to Miles and allowing her bump to slightly touch his waist. “I hope I don’t make you feel like that.” 

“You could never.” Miles quickly reassured. “You’ve been the one person who has always listened to me. That’s kind of how we got into this situation… remember?” His hand grazed Lola’s stomach intimately for a second before they both remembered they were still in the school hallway. Lola wondered… Did touching someone’s pregnant stomach count as PDA? Miles’ hands moved back up safely to grip Lola’s shoulder in a comforting way before continuing. “You like me for me. Flaws and all. You’ve listened to all my crazy stories and heard or witnessed most of my worst moments and you still stayed. You didn’t just _stay,_ you’re having a baby with me. That’s the most real it gets.” 

Lola wasn’t quite sure how this conversation had turned into Miles reassuring her, but she definitely wasn’t complaining. She looked up at him with admiration as he continued his speech. 

“You never make me doubt myself. In fact, you make me feel like I can do anything. From encouraging me to pursue this London Writer’s Academy thing even if it wasn’t gonna work in the first place, to making a _family_ together. Last year I didn’t know if I was gonna make it to graduation. Now, with you…I have this whole future to look forward to. And it’s real. _You’re_ real. And so, so fantastic.” 

“I love you.” Lola said, stretching onto her tippy-toes and sneaking a kiss onto Miles’ lips. Their kiss lingered just slightly longer than it should have in the school hallway. “So tell me...just how bad was the interview?” Lola said, attempting to get back to the subject.

Miles sighed. “Mr. Mitchell is already gonna chew me out for the way I handled the interview -- I don’t want him mad at me for making you late to class too. Let me try to give you the scoop while I walk you to class.” 

Lola nodded and allowed him to begin to guide her to the Home Economics classroom. “I wish you could take this class with me. Frankie and Esme are totally gonna partner up for every project and leave me with some rando.” 

“Esme’s got _girlfriend_ dibs.” Miles made a teasing remark. The ‘will-they-won’t-they’ nature of Frankie and Esme’s relationship had begun to be a bit of an inside joke between Miles and Lola. They were both admittedly curious about how this entanglement was going to end up, but they were stepping away and letting it play out from a safe distance -- which was usually the best course of action when it came to Esme -- or Frankie for that matter. 

“They’re just friends.” Lola shoulder-checked Miles playfully with a laugh. “Very close, _possibly romantic_ gal pals.” She couldn’t help herself. “Hush. Frankie will figure things out when she’s ready. I for one am glad she’s not spending the entire semester involved with some lame boy who’s only gonna break her heart.” 

“Yeah, cause Esme has a better track record…” Miles started. 

Lola understood why Miles was hesitant to trust Esme. Their history was checkered to say the least. “It seems like she’s changed at least a little bit, right? I mean, I’m not on her side or anything but if Frankie likes her and trusts her and they’ve been hanging out drama-free for months…maybe they’ve met their match, but in like…a healthy way.”

“Frankie _does_ seem happier than she’s been in a long time. And more stable, surprisingly.” Miles agreed. “As long as Esme doesn’t start showing major red flags I won’t have to intervene.” 

Lola paused, suddenly feeling the fluttering of the baby moving around again. It still caught her completely off guard every time. The life inside of her moving made everything about this situation feel so... _real_. It was both exciting and terrifying.

“What’s wrong?” Miles asked, seeming concerned.

“Nothing,” Lola said, forming a smile. “Just…the baby’s kicking.”

Miles’ eyes widened. “It is?” he sputtered, the goofiest, most awestruck look on his face. Lola loved how excited and nervous he got whenever he talked about their baby. She really couldn’t imagine going through this with anyone else.

Lola nodded. “Give me your hand so you can feel it too,” she said, and placed his hand on her bump, not really caring who was around to stare anymore.

Miles waited for the kick, but his expression turned blank. “I don’t feel anything…” 

Lola frowned. The baby was _just_ kicking. “I guess it stopped,” she sighed, apologetic. “I’m sorry…”

Miles looked disappointed, but brushed it off. “It’s alright,” he assured Lola, hand still grazing her bump. “Maybe our little one just has stage fright,” he teased.

“Mr. Hollingsworth, Miss Pacini.” A familiar deep voice -- Mr. Mitchell -- cut in with his usual friendly demeanor, greeting them at the classroom door. Lola quickly moved Miles’ hand away — definitely awkward timing. “I don’t mean to interrupt, but Miles, I’d like to chat for a moment alone…”

Lola and Miles had gotten so caught up discussing Frankie and Esme and the baby that Miles hadn’t gotten a chance to fill Lola in on the specifics regarding his London Writer’s Academy meeting. From the look on Mr. Mitchell’s face, though, it seemed like Miles might be in some hot water. 

Frankie walked into Home Economics class arm-in-arm with Esme completely not expecting to turn the corner and see her older brother embroiled in a discussion with Mr. Mitchell. She processed her brother’s presence, looked to Esme and shrugged, then continued to her seat. “I’m sure I’ll get filled in later,” she said to Esme. Frankie seemed to always get the downlow on whatever was going on, whether she wanted to hear it or not. 

“Ooh, wonder what he did,” Esme snickered, taking her seat next to Frankie. She turned around as Lola walked in. “Cute waddle, Lo.” 

Lola just stared blankly, seeming to be in a bit of a daze. “Uh…thanks, I guess?” 

Frankie winced a little. Esme usually meant well, but it didn’t always translate correctly. “Everything okay with you and Miles?”

“ _We’re_ fine,” Lola said. She clutched her belly and sank into her seat, letting out a tired sigh. “I’m not so sure Miles is, though. Did he tell you what happened at the interview? He barely talked to me about it.”

Frankie shrugged, watching out of the corner of her eye as Shay and Tiny walked in and took their seats in the back. “I don’t know, I think he just-”

Before Frankie could finish her thoughts, Mr. Mitchell walked in. He was carrying a large box and looking kind of disgruntled over something, probably whatever he and Miles had just been discussing. “Good morning, everyone. Sorry for the delay.”

Lola eyed the box in his hands. “Please tell me there are donuts in there…!”

Mr. Mitchell just laughed. “Unfortunately, no.” He reached into the box and pulled out...

 _Oh god,_ Frankie realized- _the robobaby project._ The same one Miles had warned her about last year after nearly flunking it himself. “This,” Mr. Mitchell said, holding up a demonic-looking baby doll, “is your midterm project. And it’s worth half your grade.”

The doll let out a shrill cry, strikingly realistic for a hunk of plastic. Frankie let out a loud sigh along with the rest of her classmates. The only one who didn’t immediately groan was Lola, who was too busy staring into space. 

“Partners?”

“Huh?” Frankie looked over at Esme and snapped out of her brief daydream trance. Everyone in the class was splitting into pairs now. Frankie glanced at Tiny and Shay already coupled up in the back, then her eyes fell on Lola, who was sitting alone. She did _want_ to partner with Esme, but…ditching Lola was kind of how they had ended up in this situation in the first place. And if she was being honest, she was becoming more and more confused about what her and Esme’s relationship actually _was_. Esme wanted to spend nearly every minute together, but hadn’t so much as mentioned the kiss between them that night on the roof. “I dunno,” Frankie said to Esme, still looking at Lola. “Maybe I should-”

Esme laid her hand over Frankie’s. “But I have _dibs._ You promised the other day when we were swimming that we’d pair up for every stupid project.” She gave her a pair of puppy eyes and added, “If they’re gonna force us to take this class, we have to at _least_ make it fun.”

Frankie slowly tore her eyes away from Lola. Damn Esme being so persuasive. “I guess you _do_ have dibs…”

….

Lola sat in the back of the class alone, watching frantically as everyone around her quickly partnered up. This type of thing didn’t _used_ to bother her so much — she could make friends pretty easily, and partnering up with a random for an assignment wasn’t the worst thing in the world. But now that she already stuck out at Degrassi like a sore thumb, she couldn’t help but feel a lot more self-conscious about being the only one in the class without a partner. Damn Esme for calling dibs on Frankie.

She glanced over at Shay, who was already making googly eyes at her robobaby with Tiny...maybe there was room for a third? She got up from her seat and (ugh, did she _really_ waddle?) shyly tapped Shay on the shoulder. “Can I uh, maybe partner with you guys? Poly parenting is a thing, right?” she tried, letting out an awkward laugh. The three of them didn’t exactly have the smoothest history, and it would probably be beyond weird, but they were still her _friends,_ right?

Tiny gave her a smile, but it was clearly rooted more in pity than anything. Again, pregnancy seemed to be a kryptonite to everyone. Lola didn’t want special treatment — she just wanted people to treat her like she wasn’t a freak. “I don’t think we’re allowed to have groups of three…” Tiny trailed off.

Lola pouted slightly at Shay. “Whatever happened to bros over hoes?” she stumbled on her words, knowing that wasn’t quite right. “I mean...hoes over bros? Whatever, aren’t bestie dibs a thing anymore?”

“Sorry, Lo…” Shay said, and gave her that same half-genuine smile. “Next project, you get dibs, okay? Promise.”

“Fine,” Lola said. She looked across the room at Frankie and Esme, who were laughing and passing their robo-baby back and forth. “Guess I’ll work alone.”

Mr. Mitchell called the class to attention. “Alright, does everyone have a partner? Raise your hand if you don’t.”

Lola raised her arm slightly. Why did teachers always single people out like that? To her surprise though, she wasn’t the only one to raise her hand. She shifted her gaze over to Saad, a quiet kid in the back corner by himself. She hadn’t even noticed him…

“Perfect,” Mr. Mitchell said, nodding at the both of them. “Lola, Saad, pair up.”

Lola awkwardly shuffled over to Saad. “Um, hi,” she said timidly. She didn’t know much about Saad, honestly. She knew Zig supposedly had beef with him and Hunter didn’t seem to like him… but why would she trust either of _their_ opinions? Besides, she definitely wasn’t in a position to be judging anyone else. “Guess you’re stuck with me. Do you mind?” She tried to muster a smile as she sat down next to him.

“Not at all,” Saad smiled back, and Lola breathed a sigh of relief. These days, she didn’t know what to expect from anyone. 

Mr. Mitchell came by and handed them their robo-baby, a little doll in a pink outfit. Lola froze as she took it into her arms, suddenly remembering how she was going to be holding a _real_ one of these in just a few months. For everyone else, this was an assignment— for her, it was a _test_. And to make matters worse, the doll was already crying. “Oh, um…” Lola scrambled, frantically rocking it in her arms.

Mr. Mitchell noticed the look of panic on her face and chuckled, “It’s alright, just take it easy.” None of the teachers at Degrassi had really been any better than the students at not being totally weird about Lola’s pregnancy, but Mr. Mitchell seemed to have a soft spot for her at least. Maybe because he probably knew the baby was Miles’. “You’ll be fine,” he added.

Lola turned to Saad after Mr. Mitchell was gone. “I’m not sure I’ll be getting us an A on this project…” she admitted. Of course _now_ the baby— her _real_ baby— was kicking away. She reached instinctively to feel it and nearly dropped the doll in doing so.

Saad quickly grabbed the fake baby from her before it hit the ground. As soon as he held it, it immediately stopped crying. “Good thing I have experience,” he said, his voice more reassuring than bragging. “Four little brothers and sisters,” he clarified, and smiled.

Lola felt more at ease already. This assignment was going to be the death of her, but as far as partners went…hers didn’t seem half bad. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please consider leaving a comment or kudos! We love feedback ♡︎✨


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola bonds with Esme over sushi. Frankie struggles with feeling like she's being left behind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger/content warning for very brief mentions of abortion in this chapter. 
> 
> We both personally love the friendship pairing of Lola/Esme and hope you do too!

Frankie didn’t know how Esme always convinced her to go on these last minute adventures on their lunch hour. Sometimes it was grabbing pretzels at the mall food court and occasionally blowing off class to watch a movie, other times it was just driving around town aimlessly and listening to playlists. Today, Esme had made lunch reservations at some fancy sushi place, the kind of restaurant where Frankie’s dad probably met rich donors. 

Frankie couldn’t help but feel like these little lunchtime outings were becoming more like _dates_ than an excuse to avoid eating cafeteria food. And this would be the perfect opportunity to finally talk and figure things out… if Lola wasn’t sitting in the booth with them.

“So you use the chopsticks for sashimi, but just use your hands for the nigiri,” Esme explained, pulling her chopsticks apart and taking a sip of her iced tea. She was obviously getting a kick out of being the only one who knew proper etiquette.

“Oh, wait…do they have anything here that’s not raw fish?” Lola frowned, scanning the menu. She split her chopsticks apart, but ended up accidentally breaking them in half. “I’m kinda craving this baked salmon… and these little rice balls are _adorable_ …”

Frankie sighed. A couple of months ago, she would have been elated to see Esme and Lola getting along like this. But now all she wanted was a minute alone where she could finally get some answers out of Esme. Ever since her and Miles’ conversation last weekend, Frankie couldn’t stop obsessing over what she and Esme were actually _doing_ here. Working together on the robo-baby last period had only confused Frankie more — Esme had even said what a cute _family_ they made.

Frankie had finally worked up the courage to try and initiate that conversation during their lunch date, but then Lola complained that Miles was stuck in a meeting with Mr. Mitchell and Shay was busy with Tiny, and Frankie felt too guilty about ditching her for the robo-baby project to say no when Lola begged to let her tag along. “I’m not that hungry,” Frankie muttered.

Esme made a face. “Oh, hush. You’ve been suggesting we get tempura for weeks.” She glanced at the blue-haired girl across the booth. “So, Lola. How’s the whole being pregnant thing going for you? I hope you’re milking it as much as you can. Miles should be kissing your feet every second.”

Lola seemed to be warming up to Esme lately, probably partially because she was one of the few people who hadn’t made a huge deal out of Lola’s pregnancy. Esme just kind of rolled with it. “It’s...got its ups and downs,” Lola said, grabbing another pair of chopsticks. “I could do without the extra pounds and the constant stares. But Miles makes it all worth it. I really think he’s gonna be the best dad. He and I are already talking baby names…”

“Please tell me there’s not going to be a Miles the _fourth_ ,” Esme said, scoffing a bit. “No offense.” she added quickly.

Lola just laughed. “God, no. But we were thinking, if it’s a girl…maybe Hope?”

Frankie looked up from her menu. She hadn’t even thought to ask Lola or Miles about baby names, honestly. No matter how big Lola’s belly got and how many ultrasound photos Frankie saw, her niece or nephew just still didn’t feel fully _real_ to her. “Like, after the play?”

“Well, yeah…and because it’s also kind of our thing,” Lola explained. “He said I was his hope last semester after the bus crash and everything. And he was kinda mine too...and still is. Like, this whole situation is so messy and scary, but I just feel… _hope_ when I’m around him. Hope for me and him and the baby.” 

“Yeah. Cute,” Frankie mumbled. She didn’t mean to come off so cynical. It _was_ cute, and she was glad Lola was happy. But she was a bit sick of hearing about her best friend and brother’s perfect relationship when she had absolutely no idea what was going on in her own love life.

Esme shot Frankie a look. “Well,” she said to Lola, “ _I_ like it. Honestly, I think you’re a real badass for staying at Degrassi. Screw whatever the prudes say.”

Frankie furrowed her brows at Esme. There weren’t really opposing sides to be taken in this discussion — but Frankie was still feeling like Esme wasn’t on her side. What had Frankie said or done that warranted one of Esme’s signature glacial glazes? Was Esme calling Frankie a _prude?_ Frankie immediately got a bit defensive. “Are you talking about me? I’m _not_ a prude.”

“I wasn’t referring to you, but if the prude shoe fits…” Esme gave Frankie a bit more attitude. Esme’s tone came across as slightly more light-hearted than when she was _actually_ coming for someone but Frankie still didn’t like being the target of Esme’s sass. Esme noticed Frankie’s confusion but didn’t address it. Instead, she turned to Lola. “Don’t let anyone judge you for what you do with your body. Even your best friends. Only you know what’s right for you.” 

Frankie was a bit shocked to hear Esme giving sage advice. Not that Esme wasn’t smart — in fact, she was probably the smartest person Frankie knew. She just didn’t usually come off as warm and fuzzy, especially to people she wasn’t really close to…which was almost the whole populous of Degrassi. 

Lola offered a small and sweet smile toward Esme. “Thank you,” she said, almost as if she was slightly poking at Frankie. Maybe it was a perceived slight, but it felt real to Frankie. 

“I need to pee,” Frankie said suddenly. “And, uh… powder my nose. Or... whatever needs powdering.” 

Lola and Esme both looked perplexed. “Okay…?” they both said, their voices almost in perfect unison. Frankie officially felt like she was being cast out. She got up and walked toward the bathroom, trying not to get emotionally overwhelmed before she could get confined to a bathroom stall. The last thing she wanted to do was get caught crying in public. 

…

“Do you think Frankie’s okay?” Lola asked, her voice dripping with genuine concern. “She’s been gone more than a few minutes…”

“Oh, she’s fine,” Esme tried to reassure, grabbing a bottle of soy sauce and beginning to pour it into a little green dish. “I was just messing around when I called her a prude. I forget she’s so sensitive sometimes.” 

Lola nodded. Honestly, Frankie _could_ be a bit over dramatic and delicate at times. “I just don’t want to leave her out.” 

“She hasn’t been through something like this. It’s hard to relate when you haven’t been there, especially when the topic is so… _specific_.” Esme raised her brows, seeming to slightly insinuate something, which immediately piqued Lola’s interest. 

“But _you’re_ comfortable talking with me about it?” Lola questioned. Esme had never seemed _approachable_ before. 

Esme twirled her signature side-braid with her left hand. “Something like that.” 

Lola was so, so curious now. Esme was always a bit of an enigma — not one that Lola necessarily had interest in unraveling. _Now_ , however…she couldn’t really resist. 

“Spell it out for me?” Lola decided to save time. She didn’t do well with people beating around the bush. Her mind usually wandered a bit too much for any accurate guesses to surface. “I mean, if you want.” 

“I’ve been where you are,” Esme said. “Well, where you were a few months ago.”

“ _Pregnant?”_ Lola questioned a bit too loud. “...I’m sorry,” she apologized immediately at a much quieter volume.

Esme hesitated for a moment before speaking up again, dipping her finger into the soy sauce that she had poured into a cute small painted dish. “I got pregnant in Grade 10. I used to go to another school. After everyone found out, I begged my dad to let us move. It was pretty much the worst thing ever, other than losing my mom.” 

“That must have been so hard,” Lola’s hand reached down to her own baby bump, something she did every time she was distressed. “What happened — if you don’t mind me asking?” Lola hoped she wouldn’t rip into her too much for probing. Esme _was_ the one who initially brought the information to light. 

“I learned to wrap it before I tap it,” Esme threw out a joke and a small smile. “Other than learning proper condom etiquette…” Esme trailed off for a moment, seeming like she was either lost in thought or recalling something. 

“But…” Lola was nervous to ask. “What happened to the baby?”

“I found out I was pregnant about eight weeks in. That gave me time to think and research my options,” Esme stated plainly. “I had an abortion.”

“Oh.” Lola admittedly didn’t quite know what to say. It wasn’t the fact that Esme had an abortion — she’d always been pro-choice, and deciding to carry her own pregnancy to term had only further cemented her view that nobody should ever be _forced_ to do this. She just hadn’t expected Esme to open up like this, to reveal something so personal. It wasn’t like the two of them were exactly close friends…in fact, this lunch was probably the first time they’d ever really gotten along so well. “Do you feel like it was the right decision?” Lola finally mustered up the courage to ask.

Esme sort of glanced off into space. “Yeah. It was. For me, anyway. Not easy — but right,” 

“I don’t think I could have done this if I didn’t have Miles,” Lola admitted. “I mean…I _could_ have. But I don’t think I would have wanted to…” She thought back to what her doctor said at her last appointment: _“Not all teen moms have so much help, opportunity, or hope in their lives,”_ She couldn’t imagine going through all this without the support she had. At the end of the day though, this was still really scary and she still had no idea what she was getting herself into. She couldn’t even imagine how Esme must have felt. “Have you ever told Frankie?” Lola couldn’t help herself from asking.

Esme shook her head, almost laughing. “No. She wouldn’t get it. Plus I don’t really go around announcing it to people. Not that I’m ashamed of it…I mean, I _used_ to be. I just don’t really like talking about it now. People get weird and judgy...”

“So is that why you’ve been so nice to me lately?” Lola asked. 

Esme offered Lola a slight smile. “Yeah, yeah…don’t get too used to it.”

"I appreciate that you're not judgy. I've pretty much been feeling _non-stop_ judged since everyone found out I was pregnant. It's nice to be able to breathe for a sec." 

"Just to be clear, I'm definitely still judging other things. Your choice of baby daddy for example..."

Feeling the need to defend her man, Lola chimed in, cutting Esme off. "Miles is in a lot better place now than he was before." 

"I can tell," Esme's voice was conveying _something_ , Lola just wasn't sure what it was. Was Esme upset? Possibly even _jealous_? "He's in a better place than he was when we were together. I'm happy for him." Esme's words seemed satisfactory, but her tone seemed slightly flat and off. 

"You're in a better place too, right?" Lola didn't really think too much about the fact that Esme and Miles were previously involved with one another. She had pretty much done pretty much everything she could to forget that fact. All of that seemed like so long ago too -- when Esme and Miles ran rampant on a drug and alcohol bender. Miles had explained to Lola that he was spiraling due to his family situation and feeling misunderstood by everyone including Tristan, but Lola had never really thought about or wondered why _Esme_ was acting out so severely. Lola's curiosity was piqued but she didn't want to push too much. "It seems like you and Frankie have something really good going.. _whatever_ it is,"

Esme shrugged nonchalantly, clearly downplaying her feelings and involvement. "Frankie is definitely the least chaotic Hollingsworth. I guess that's _something_."

Lola held back from prodding Esme for more information. In the short time that Lola had spent with Esme there was one thing she had learned for sure. It took a _lot_ for Esme to feel comfortable opening up and trusting someone. Esme reminded Lola of Miles in that respect. "You don't have to talk to me about anything if you don't want." Lola offered a soft smile. "I just wanna make sure you're good. Frankie really cares about you." 

Esme nodded, clearly indicating that she didn't have interest in delving any deeper into the topic for now. Lola respected her boundaries, focusing her eyes on the cute little plates the restaurant had provided to hold your soy sauce. "Why don't we get fancy little plates for dipping sauces at other types of restaurants? I want one of these to hold ketchup for my fries at The Dot." 

"Why don't you steal it, then?" Esme offered a solution.

"I dunno," Lola thought about it for a moment. "Maybe I'll just look online..."

In that same moment, Lola felt a familiar fluttering in her stomach. The baby was kicking again. Lola felt like she was never going to get used to the weird feeling of a living thing moving inside her body. Especially once the baby got close to the size of an actual _baby_. Lola couldn’t even begin to imagine how she would look and feel when she got to be nine months pregnant. She knew it was only a short few months away, but still…

“Wanna feel something weird?” Lola asked Esme, crossing over to the other side of the booth and offering her stomach for Esme to touch. Under any other circumstances this would be beyond bizarre. 

Esme hesitantly raised her hand up and placed it on Lola’s swollen stomach. “Just this once. I need to be reminded how blessed I am to have birth control.” 

Lola laughed and the baby kicked even harder. “I think my baby likes you.” 

“Who wouldn't?” Esme joked, a sarcastic smile playing across her features. 

For a long time, Lola admittedly didn’t care too much for Esme. Now she was starting to understand how and why Frankie had fallen in with this girl. Once you got past the intimidation factor, Esme was relatively harmless and sort of sweet…as long as you stayed on her good side. 

….

Frankie returned to the table with her eyes still a bit glossy. She knew she was being dramatic, but for some reason everything just felt all wrong today. She just wanted to get some clarity from Esme, but all she felt now was more confused. Maybe it was dumb, but seeing Esme cozy up to Lola so quickly made Frankie feel like maybe she wasn’t special after all. Maybe Esme had never even liked her in the way she thought. Maybe she was just some pet Esme kept around to feel good about herself after losing Zig to Maya…

Lola didn’t even seem to notice that Frankie had been crying. “Franks, you’ve _got_ to feel this,” she said, grabbing Frankie’s hand and placing it on her stomach before she could even respond. “The baby’s throwing a dance party in here.”

Frankie jolted upright as she felt the kick. To say it was strange was an understatement. She’d never felt anything like it, and knowing that the moving thing inside Lola was directly related to her was even stranger. Normally, Frankie’s heart did warm up a bit when it came to her niece or nephew, and if she was in a less sour mood, feeling this kick probably would have softened her. Right now though, she wasn’t really feeling like gushing about babies. “Sheesh. Hyper much?”

“Well it _is_ your brother’s baby…” Lola smiled teasingly. She paused, seeming to finally notice Frankie’s bad mood. “What’s the matter with you?”

“ _Nothing_ ,” Frankie whined. She couldn’t open up about this with both Lola _and_ Esme sitting here. “I’m just...hungry.”

Esme smirked at Lola. “Ignore her, she’s just being a princess.” The way she said it was clearly teasing, but Frankie felt more and more like she was _trying_ to piss her off. 

Before anyone could say anything else, the waiter approached with their food. _Lucky timing._ “Baked salmon roll, spicy tuna roll, and shrimp tempura roll,” he said, handing them to each of them.

Lola waited until the server was gone, then pulled out her phone. “Let me just double check that this is safe for me to eat…”

Frankie poked at her shrimp tempura roll. “I didn’t even get a chance to decide what to order,” she said towards Esme. 

“You were in the bathroom, so I just ordered for you,” Esme shrugged, digging into her spicy tuna. 

“Well, maybe you could have _asked_ me first,” Frankie said.

Esme put her chopsticks down. “What’s the big deal?” 

“The big deal is you should have asked me what I wanted instead of just assuming,” Frankie rambled, knowing full well she was coming off crazy. Esme was starting to look at her the way Jonah had, but she couldn’t stop now that the words were coming out. “Maybe you should have considered _my_ feelings and let me get a word in instead of just deciding everything yourself and expecting me to just go along with it.”

Esme stared blankly, clearly caught off guard. “Fine. Sorry for assuming.”

Lola, apparently totally oblivious, looked up from her phone. “Good news! Baked seafood is _totally_ fine to eat while you’re pregnant.” She shoved a whole piece in her mouth, then looked back and forth between Frankie and Esme. “What’s with you guys?”

“Nothing’s wrong with _me_ ,” Esme said pointedly to Lola, keeping eye contact with Frankie as she spoke. “Anyways, Lola. I heard about this ravine party next weekend, you should _totally_ come...”

Frankie blinked back tears and zoned out as Esme gushed to Lola about this ravine party, making no effort whatsoever to include Frankie anymore. Lola and Esme laughed with each other across the booth like she wasn’t even there, and Frankie felt like disappearing. She couldn’t even pretend she was upset about the sushi — Esme had gotten her order exactly right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please consider leaving feedback and sharing our story with anyone who might be interested! <3


	30. Chapter 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola discusses her upcoming responsibilities with her father.

Lola woke up to the sound of a baby crying. For a split second she felt like she had been transported months into the future — either that or she fell into some sort of space-time continuum or something…Lola wasn’t fully sure what that meant but she had heard Hunter talk about them during a vlog squad meeting once or twice. 

Once Lola woke up a bit more she remembered the reality of the situation. The robo-baby project. She had slept so well the night before that she was almost able to forget. 

“Mija,  _ please! _ ” Lola’s father called out from the other room. “That thing has been going off for  _ twenty  _ minutes!” 

Lola grumpily got out of bed and slowly shifted over to where her fake baby was going off like an alarm. Only a few months before this would be happening every morning and possibly all night. In this particular moment she was feeling completely frustrated and unready. She reached down and picked the crying robo-baby up, holding it close to her chest. There was a moment where Lola’s maternal instincts snuck in. Her heart fluttered and she felt the baby kick. Sometimes those moments felt like magic. Other times…

Lola carried the fake baby in her arms all the way to the bathroom down the hall. She set it down on the counter and quickly unloaded the contents of her stomach from her mouth into the toilet. 

“I thought this part was over…” Lola wiped her chin and picked the fake baby up again, observing it for a moment. “You know, you still need a name…”

Lola and Saad hadn’t really talked about much for this project. They  _ definitely _ hadn’t discussed things like baby names for their school project. Lola had been slowly picking through a baby name book on her own, but only for her  _ real _ baby. 

Lola’s now-empty stomach rumbled. Pregnancy was so  _ weird.  _ One moment she was completely nauseated, the next she was completely dying for an apple pastry. She would  _ not _ miss having these pregnancy symptoms. 

“Shhh…” Lola held the still-crying robo-baby to her chest as she headed to the kitchen after quickly throwing on the cutest maternity clothes she could find in her closet. She  _ really  _ didn’t know how to handle a crying baby. Probably not the best considering she’d be having one in a few short months. 

“Qué tal? Do you need a hand?” Lola’s father chimed in. His hands were full making what smelled like chocolate chip pancakes. Suddenly Lola’s craving shifted. This breakfast smelled and looked completely delicious. Ever since Lola revealed her pregnancy she swore her father started making more and more yummy breakfast every day. 

“You’re busy,” Lola pointed out. “I’ve got it. I just need to…” She shifted the baby onto her other shoulder, trying to find an angle that would make the tiny robot stop crying just for a minute. Her ears felt like they were ringing already. “Come on…just calm down…” she muttered as if the robot was going to hear her and suddenly cease. That, of course, did not happen. Instead, the robot spit up. Lola didn’t even know that was a feature. “Oh,  _ eww _ …!”

Lola’s father chuckled and tossed her a paper towel. “I suppose that thing is good practice, hmm?” he said. To his credit, her father had gotten much better about acknowledging baby stuff over the past couple of months. Lola could tell he still didn’t fully accept the idea that she was pregnant and that he was going to be a grandparent this young, but they had come a long way since that night at the Hollingsworth dinner. Lola just kind of felt like they still didn’t really have a  _ plan _ . Things were just sort of happening.

“I guess...” Lola mumbled. She cleaned herself and the robo-baby up, then sank into the kitchen chair and groaned. “Was I this loud and messy as a baby?” 

“Oh, no,” Mr. Pacini said. He flipped one of the pancakes over and added teasingly, “You were  _ much  _ worse, Mija.” 

“Great,” Lola sighed as she set the fake baby against her shoulder. Maybe Miles could handle their real baby in the morning…after the baby cried for half the night and wouldn’t stop no matter what Lola did.

Lola never claimed to be a morning person, but today she  _ really _ wasn’t feeling up to rising and shining. How was she going to handle school with almost zero sleep? This was just a preview into what her future would hold…admittedly, she was feeling much less ready than she had in months. 

“Having a bit of a reality check?” Lola’s dad spoke up, placing a plate of chocolate chip pancakes in front of Lola along with a jar of peanut butter. “Let me hold that thing for a while. You need to eat up.” 

Lola passed the robo-baby to her father without hesitating and looked down at the pancakes. She suddenly recalled the time Miles had cooked her pancakes and a smile crept onto her face. At least if she was going through this, it was with the best possible person for her. She just wished Miles could be there with her  _ now.  _ Having to wait for school to see Miles just really wasn’t cutting it anymore. Lola wondered if she and Miles would move in together once the baby was born. Would they get a place of their own or would Miles’ parents insist she moved into the Hollingsworth chateau under their supervision? Like her dad would let  _ either  _ of those happen. It didn’t help that they still didn’t have a crib or baby clothes or anything. There were still a lot of decisions to make — more than Lola could handle at 7 in the morning, especially before her pancakes. 

After scarfing down half of the plate, Lola looked up at her father. “What are we going to do when the baby gets here?” she asked directly, pancake crumbs spilling out of her mouth. She grabbed a napkin and cleaned the chocolate off her face. “I mean…”

Her father glanced up from rocking the robo-baby. He made it look so easy, Lola thought. “Well, you’ll get used to the lack of sleep, that’s for sure. Get ready to hear crying and screaming  _ all  _ night-” He smiled down at the fake baby, who was now cooing happily. “And unfortunately for you, yours won’t have a reset button.”

Lola didn’t feel any more reassured. “But…how am I gonna handle school? Or get any sleep? Am I ever gonna be able to have a sleepover with my friends or go on a normal date with Miles again? How am I supposed to still be a teenager with a  _ baby _ ?” she couldn’t help but ramble, suddenly feeling all her insecurities coming flooding out. She knew she and Miles had talked a big game about being responsible enough, but the closer it got to her due date, the more panicked Lola felt. She didn’t regret her choice, but still...this was  _ scary _ . And it felt a little like reality was starting to sink in.

“I told you this would change your whole life, remember?” Mr. Pacini said plainly, but it felt kind of like a  _ gotcha _ . “I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but with a little one, you won’t really  _ have _ time to be a normal teenager anymore. And of course I’m going to help you Mija, but besides school, this baby has  _ got _ to be your priority. It’s your responsibility.”

“And Miles’...” Lola added under her breath. She took another bite of pancakes and felt the baby squirm around, like it was doing a somersault. She felt like this conversation was causing her to quickly lose her appetite. She knew her dad was trying his best, but it felt more like he was lecturing than trying to be helpful. It also didn’t help that her hormones were really getting to her this morning. “I don’t understand why I can’t sleep over at the Hollingsworths’ anymore,” she found herself blurting out. “Or stay out on school nights? I should be spending time with my friends while I still can! And what’s the big deal if Miles happens to be home when I’m at Frankie’s, anyway? It’s not like I can get even  _ more _ pregnant.”

“That’s not a very good argument,” Lola’s father pointed out. 

“But it’s  _ true _ !” Lola shot back. 

Lola’s father’s eyebrows furrowed. “I need to know you’re safe, Mija. Especially in your _condition._ ”

“I’m pregnant, not made of glass. What’s with all these new rules?” Lola didn’t step down. Things had been kind of different between them since her father found out she was pregnant, but this morning he seemed over the top.

He let out a large sigh before sitting down at the table with her. Lola’s dog Fernando followed from the spot he had been occupying right next to the stove and began looking up at Lola with classic puppy dog eyes. “Please don’t feed that dog.” Mr. Pacini said, rubbing his forehead with his hands in a fashion similar to the way Miles would when he was stressed and overwhelmed. “I already refused Fernando the whole time I was cooking. Feeding him now is negative reinforcement.”

Lola usually only fed Fernando when her dad wasn’t looking. At this time, however, Lola quickly ripped off a piece of her pancake and offered it to the dog under the table. She then looked to her father to hear whatever lecture he was about to go into. Lola was already in hot water, after all…how much more anger could possibly be conjured up by feeding a dog a tiny piece of a pancake? 

“ _ Lola! _ ” her father raised his voice, sounding more stern. “You need to listen to me!”

“I think I know what I’m doing.” She squinted slightly, nonchalantly feeding another piece of her breakfast to her cute, fluffy dog. “You’re too hard on Fernando. He just wants a little…” Lola paused, noticing that Fernando was trying to climb into her lap for a better view of her plate. It didn’t help that there was really no room in her lap anymore. “Alright, get down…” she started attempting to advise the dog, but Fernando was on a mission. Lola tried to get the situation under control, but Fernando had already placed a paw on her plate and snagged the remaining pancake, which promptly fell to the floor. Lola placed the dog on the floor next to her now-ruined breakfast. 

“If you had listened to me in the first place…” Lola’s father began to chastise. 

“You sound just like Mom right now,” Lola said. “Definitely not a compliment, BTW.” 

“Probably because I  _ have  _ been talking to your mother,” her father said. “She thinks I’ve been too easy on you. And I think she’s right.” 

A small gasp escaped Lola’s lips. “So now you and mom are talking about parenting?” she said, scoffing slightly under her breath. She didn’t usually test her father this much, but when it came to her mom and these hormones... “I can’t believe you’d go behind my back like this.”

“Mija,  _ someone  _ has to talk to her. She’s your mother,” Lola’s father replied. “This isn’t a bad grade on a math quiz. This is a  _ baby. _ I know it’s hard for you to grasp right now, but this isn’t something you can just shove to the side.” 

“I  _ know! _ ” Lola exclaimed, already frustrated. The robo-baby started crying again. 

“Don’t use that tone with me,” Lola’s father warned sternly. “And why haven’t you returned your mom’s texts or calls for the past month? You’ve nearly worried her sick.”

Lola crossed her arms across her chest, resting them on her baby bump. “I didn’t know she cared…” Lola said, but she knew that was a cop-out. She knew her mother cared to some degree...that wasn’t the main problem. Lola just didn’t know if she could trust that her mother wouldn’t abandon her again. After all, her mom had skipped town at the beginning of puberty — right when a girl needed her mother the most. Lola tried her best to not resent her mom too much for the divorce, but sometimes she just couldn’t help it. Lola tried again, throwing out a statement that was closer to the truth this time, “I’m just scared. Of everything.” 

Lola’s father let out an exasperated sigh. “Well, if you weren’t prepared for this level of responsibility, then you shouldn’t have had sex…”

Lola froze, kind of taken aback by her father’s bluntness. He was really going to go there. She knew he was super traditional and didn’t really believe in premartial sex in the first place, but considering his own track record with marriage, could he really judge? Plus, she had thought she was being safe. She’d just screwed up taking her pills. It’s not like she’d waltzed into Miles’ room that night with the intentions of making a baby. Lola supposed she should have expected this lecture sooner, but it still stung. 

“If you had just waited, if you had just  _ listened _ to me…” Lola’s father continued. The robo-baby was starting to quiet down, but still kind of whimpering.

“I don’t want to talk about this,” Lola said meekly, as if that would make her dad suddenly just drop the subject. She wished today wasn’t a school day so she could just go into her room, bury herself in her pillows, and have a good cry. 

“I know you don’t want to hear it, but you have to take responsibility for your actions. Your baby needs to be your first priority. The first thing you think about when making any decision. And I know you have your problems with your mother, but she could really help right now — if you let her.”

Lola hated arguing with her father like this. She hated it even more when he had a point. Before she could even formulate a response, she was distracted by a chime from her cell phone. She glanced over and saw a text message from… _ Esme  _ pop up on the screen. Lola reached for her phone, immediately consumed with curiosity. 

Lola’s father frowned. He  _ hated _ it when she used her phone at the table. “Lola, are you listening to me?” he said, his voice still stern.

“Uh...yeah?” Lola said, knowing full-well she wasn’t. “Just...one sec…” She opened the text message:  _ “Hey Lo! Remember that ravine party I was telling you about? So it’s tomorrow night and you should DEF come. Drag Frankie with you. Or don’t. IDC.” _

Lola read the text over again and absorbed it. Did she honestly have a desire to go to some party in the woods? Not really. But the more she thought about what her father was saying, how she wasn’t going to be able to do any normal teenage stuff once the baby got here, the more she felt like she was running out of time to just...have _fun_. She knew her father would never let her go in a million years if she asked, but maybe he didn’t need to know. Maybe she could just try and be a normal teenager for one night while she still could. Was there really any harm in one night of fun? Granted, one night of fun was how she’d ended up pregnant in the first place, but still…

Without dwelling on it any further, Lola texted back,  _ “Down. Send me the deets.”  _ She made a mental note to talk to Frankie and Shay during lunch period and convince them to join. Should she bring Miles…? She wasn’t really sure he would be thrilled about her going to something like this with Esme. She finally set her phone down and looked up at her father, who definitely did  _ not  _ look happy. “Sorry, that was just…homework…” she fibbed weakly.

Lola’s father let out a long sigh. “I’d like you to pick a night to have dinner with your mother soon,” he said, rubbing his forehead again. “We can do it here or her place or the Cantina…it doesn’t matter. I just want you to talk with her.”

Lola didn’t really feel like arguing anymore. “Fine,” she conceded. She reached down and picked Fernando up to cuddle him, and he licked her face happily. Fernando was kind of like a baby, right? A really fuzzy, slobbery baby with bad breath.

Before either Lola or her dad could say anything else, the doorbell rang. Fernando leapt off of Lola’s lap and barked, causing the baby to kick sharply. “Ouch...” Lola muttered, holding her belly as she got out of her chair to answer the door. Fernando beat her to the door, howling and jumping up and down. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to Tess. Happy birthday! <3


	31. Chapter 31

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola and Miles discuss their future.

Lola gasped as soon as she opened the door. Right in front of her was a giant bouquet of white and yellow roses, the most beautiful flowers she’d ever seen. Miles poked his head out from behind and handed them to her with a smile, looking happy as ever. “Good morning, beautiful.”

“Ohmigosh!” Lola gushed, feeling a million butterflies all at once. She took in the smell of the roses for a second as Fernando jumped up and down on Miles’ salmon pants, suddenly reminded of how lucky she was to have him by her side during this pregnancy, someone who wanted to make her feel special just because. Only Miles could completely turn her bad mood around in an instant like this. Truly, having him by her side was what made any of this bearable.

“I love you,” Lola said to Miles, standing on her tippy toes to kiss him, something she could barely do anymore without her baby bump getting in the way. She savored the sensation of his lips against hers, wishing she could bottle up the feeling and keep it forever. She’d probably kissed him over a hundred times, but somehow every kiss still felt just as magical as their first, on that fateful night they’d made this baby and changed everything forever.

“Ahem.” Lola’s father cleared his throat from behind her. Kind of a mood killer… “Buenos dias, Miles,” he said plainly. Her father liked Miles _okay_ , but he still definitely saw him as the guy who knocked up his daughter. “Would you care for some pancakes? I think there’s a few left…”

“Oh, uh, that’s alright, Mr. Pacini,” Miles said, always a bit tongue-tied in front of his girlfriend’s father. “I just came to see if I could give Lola a ride to school. You can’t be too early for homeroom, right?” He gave her dad a crooked smile and reached to grab Lola’s bag for her before she could even attempt to bend down.

“Fine by me — I could stand to get to the Cantina earlier,” Lola’s father said, though it was clear from his expression that this morning’s conversation between him and Lola wasn’t yet finished. He looked at the bouquet in Lola’s hands and added, “I’ll put these in a vase for you, Mija. Be _safe.”_

“We’re just going to school,” Lola reminded her dad, handing him the flowers. “But we’ll drive carefully.” She planted a light peck on her father’s cheek, still not feeling great about how their conversation had gone this morning. She didn’t like fighting with her dad. It was just… _hard_ sometimes. 

“Ready to get going?” Miles looked to Lola. Fernando humped his shoe, causing Miles to shake him off. Fernando whined.

“Mhmm,” Lola said, trying to let go of the stress. She blew a kiss at Fernando and turned to follow Miles out the door. She’d deal with everything with her father later. Right now she just wanted to follow her boyfriend and get to school.

“Mija…forgetting something?”

Lola just stood there for a second, unsure of what her father was talking about. Then, it hit her. _“Oh, crap…!”_

Lola ran back into the kitchen and grabbed the robo-baby, which was already crying again. Miles chuckled and she promptly shoved the screaming baby in his arms, already feeling her ears start to ring again. Was this a glimpse into their future? Lola honestly didn’t know if she was prepared in the slightest anymore. At least she had Miles to hold her hand in the meantime…

Lola buckled herself into the passenger seat of Miles’ car and let out a large sigh, relieved to be getting out of the house and spending time with her boyfriend, even if they were just going to school. With everything going on, she felt like she hadn’t seen nearly enough of him lately. She’d never thought of herself as being the clingy type, but when it came to Miles, she just really wanted to be around him all the time. There was something about having him nearby that just made her feel better about... _everything_.

Miles glanced over at Lola as they turned into the Degrassi parking lot. “You feeling okay? You’ve been kinda quiet.” 

“Mhmm. Just...sleepy and thinking,” Lola yawned, leaning against the window. She didn’t really feel like rehashing all the details of this morning’s argument with her dad. She just wanted to get her mind off things.

Lola glanced in the rear-view mirror to check on the robo-baby, which she’d buckled into one of the back seats. The toy had calmed down since they’d started driving, thank god. She reached down to rub her baby bump, trying to picture their _real_ baby cradled back there in a car seat in a few months. Crap, that was _another_ thing they still needed to buy. “Do you ever get really scared about all this?” she finally asked Miles the question that had been weighing on her mind constantly these days. “I mean...about the baby and everything?”

Miles gave her that goofy smile of his. “Are you kidding?” he said as he pulled into the parking spot. His tone was light, but there was definitely a sense of fear laced in his voice. “Only _all the time!_ I don’t think I’ve slept more than four or five hours a night since you told me you were pregnant.”

Lola smiled back at him and let herself ease up a little. Not because she was any less stressed, but because she knew Miles understood exactly what she was feeling. Terrified, excited, overwhelmed, absolutely petrified…those were just some of the emotions Lola felt when she thought about the near future. She gently brushed her other hand against Miles’ cheek, just feeling really connected to both him and the baby at the moment. She always felt like she could be vulnerable with Miles in a way she couldn’t with anyone else. “I can’t believe we’re gonna be _parents!_ ” she said, allowing her voice to crack just a little. 

Miles gently removed her hand from his cheek so he could kiss it. “Me either,” he said, placing his hand on top of hers across her stomach. 

Miles was quiet for a second, looking like he was deep in thought about something. Then after a moment, he spoke up again, “Hey, Lo...what if we went to London?”

Lola sat up straight. “What?” she said, honestly confused.

“Not like, _now_. I was just thinking, after you graduate...what if we moved there? You, me, the baby.” Miles smiled earnestly. “I could go to school for writing, you could check out the fashion scene, we could get a cool little flat and take our baby for walks in the park and…” He stopped himself, seeming embarrassed about getting carried away. “Never mind. It’s a dumb idea.”

“No, I actually…” Lola started. She allowed her mind to wander and picture drinking a coffee in a cute little cafe while Miles sat across from her writing and their little baby sat in her lap. “I kind of love it!” 

Lola knew it was basically a fantasy considering that she had no money, not to mention she couldn’t imagine taking care of their baby thousands of miles away from her father, who would think this was ridiculous to even dream about. But still...it was a nice thought. “You really like that London Writer’s Academy, don’t you?” she asked.

“I didn’t really want to like it, but...yeah,” Miles admitted, biting his lip. “I mean, at first I was pissed that it was a diversity spot. But you and Mr. Mitchell helped me understand. I’ve been working on this essay I’m gonna send to the recruiter and-” He paused and reassured Lola, “I’m still not _going_. You know that. But if there’s a chance I could defer for a year or two, then maybe…” 

Lola could see the glimmer of hope in her boyfriend’s eyes as he talked. While she loved seeing him happy and excited about his passion, she couldn’t help but also feel a wave of guilt wash over her. “If it wasn’t for me, you’d be going to London _now_.”

Miles shook his head. “If it wasn’t for you, I don’t know if I’d be here at _all_. I told you, I have this whole future to look forward to with _you_.” He placed his hand on top of Lola’s rounding belly. “You and me and our baby. Our family.”

“I like hearing you say that,” Lola smiled, and let out a content sigh. “ _Our family_.” Her family hadn’t been intact since her parents divorced when she was eleven and Miles’ was messed up beyond words, but they were building a family of their own now. If only her boyfriend’s words were enough to make her feel at all ready for any of this...

Just then, the baby started kicking. It was kicking harder than it ever had, as if it was responding directly to Miles and Lola’s words. Miles’ eyes widened and he completely froze, like he wasn’t sure if what he had just felt was real. “Is that...is that the baby kicking?” he said to Lola, his voice almost at a whisper.

Lola nodded, her eyes lit up and a little glassy as she smiled at her boyfriend. “That’s our baby,” she confirmed. The baby kicked again, a little softer this time. Lola had felt the kicks so many times this past week that she’d forgotten how magical the sensation was to feel for the first time. They’d spent over six whole months knowing a baby was growing inside Lola, but feeling their baby kick just made things _real_ on a whole other level. 

“Holy crap…” Miles seemed lost for words, his hand still on Lola’s belly. “Holy crap, that’s _our baby._ ” He smiled wider than Lola had ever seen, and she noticed his eyes were glassy too. The look on his face was such a contrast to the despondent state he’d been in that fateful day he and Lola collided in the hallway. Now, there was a reignited sense of hope in Miles’ eyes, in his whole being, one that Lola loved seeing.

Lola slowly leaned in and kissed him, taking a second to savor this little moment before the first bell rang. “I love you,” she said, combing her fingers through his freshly cut, spiky hair. “So much.”

“I love you too,” Miles smiled. Lola just loved how easily the words came to them. He placed a kiss on top of her blue head. “Don’t ever forget how much.”

The school bell rang just then, signaling that their moment of bliss had officially come to an end. If Lola wasn’t on the verge of flunking geometry, she would have suggested they skip class just to prolong this moment a bit more. But Lola knew she couldn’t delay things forever…

Lola’s phone chimed as Miles stepped out of the car to go around and help her out of her seat. She quickly glanced at it — it was from...her mother. _“Chiquilla, your father said he talked to you about dinner. See you soon —Mama.”_

Miles opened the car door and reached for her hand to help her up. “Everything okay?” 

Lola sighed, suddenly remembering why she was so stressed this morning in the first place. “Can we sit here for a couple more minutes?” she said. “It’s only the first bell, no need to rush.” She slid her phone into her pocket and took Miles’ hand. Maybe she was fine with delaying things a little bit longer after all.


	32. Chapter 32

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola, Frankie, and Shay get ready for a night at the ravine with Esme. Miles and Lola have a disagreement.

Frankie eyed her own reflection in the mirror for a moment before her glance fell on her best friends, who stood in her bedroom primping and priming for a night in the ravine. What a fancy evening Esme had gotten them roped into…Frankie found herself more and more confused about her feelings for Esme as they got closer. Miles had warned Frankie not to get sucked in… _ too late now,  _ she thought. Esme had been dominating her mind for days, especially since Frankie kind of lost it on her at the sushi place. They were still working on the robo-baby assignment together, but things were definitely  _ off _ . Truthfully, Frankie wasn’t sure she wanted to go tonight at all. “Do you guys think this party is a good idea?” she sighed.

“Nothing in that nasty ravine is a good idea.” Shay played with her hair, flipping it behind her shoulders as she observed the Panther blue mesh tank top she was wearing that accentuated her perfectly toned shoulders. “Just saying.”

“You’re always _ just saying _ ,” Frankie snapped. 

“I speak my mind, okay?” Shay said, slightly defensive. 

“We know,” Lola added a coat of lip gloss onto her lips. Her tone was reassuring, but it was clear Lola mostly just wanted to appease Shay for the time being. “And we love you for it. But no amount of complaining is stopping tonight’s teen rebellion.” 

Frankie thought Lola was at her best when she had a fire lit under her. Still though, Frankie could honestly say that this path was not what she’d expected for her candy-haired friend. “Haven’t you already had enough  _ teen rebellion  _ this year?” she teased Lola.

Lola rolled her eyes. “Very funny.” She paused and examined herself in the mirror, her eyes self-consciously falling on the bump under her dark purple top. “Wait, ugh, should I change? I feel like I kinda look like Barney the Dinosaur in this…”

“You look...cute,” Frankie tried to reassure Lola. She threw a glance Shay’s way, not-so-subtly mouthing,  _ A little help here? _

Shay furrowed her brows, seeming to not understand Frankie’s cue to compliment Lola. Her silence stuck in the air for a moment. Just long enough for Lola to decide to pull the purple top above her head and take it off.

“Do you have another shirt for me to try?” Lola stood there in a bra and pants, her bump out and uncovered for the world, or at least Frankie and Shay, to see. “That top was way too clingy.” 

Shay interjected this time, but not with helpful advice. Instead she took the opportunity to poke at Frankie. “As clingy as Frankie is to Esme?” 

“Shush,” Frankie said, searching her closet for a loose-fitting top that Lola wouldn’t completely fill up with her baby bump. Her fingers and eyes fell onto an off-the-shoulder white peasant top with pink and gold detailing. Lola had complimented this shirt when Frankie wore it before once. “How’s this one? Nice and flowy.”

Lola considered it for a moment, still standing there with just a bra and pants. “Something else, maybe? That just doesn’t  _ feel _ right…”

“Who are you dressing to impress?” Shay asked. “You already have a perfect boyfriend.” 

“I just don’t want people to stare at me.” Lola admitted. “I mean, like…more than they already do.” 

Frankie tried to reason with Lola as she looked through her closet again for something else to offer. “You’ve had crazy-colored hair for  _ years _ , Lo. People already stare at you.” 

There was a quiet knock on Frankie’s bedroom door before the door swung open. Lola scrambled to cover her exposed body as Hunter appeared in the doorway holding a robo-baby over each shoulder. 

“Get out!” Frankie exclaimed, grabbing a throw pillow and tossing it at her twin brother. “We’re getting dressed!”

Lola did her best to cover her torso with the peasant top that she had just rejected. Hunter stopped and stared for a moment before turning around. 

“I was just trying to tell you that I figured out how to hack these things and get them to stop crying.” He sounded proud of himself. “If only I could do the same to  _ you, _ ” Hunter said pointedly to his twin sister. 

“Great, now go!” Frankie said. “You’re supposed to be  _ babysitting _ , not bugging us.” She had roped her antisocial brother into taking care of their robo-baby project while they got ready for the ravine party. Frankie wondered if Hunter would ever do this sort of thing when Lola’s  _ real _ baby arrived. She shivered slightly at the thought. He would  _ not  _ be a warm and fuzzy babysitter. 

Lola kept the rejected shirt wrapped around her torso as best she could — her comfort level with exposing her body had clearly just gone down to zero. She reached into Frankie’s closet and grabbed a flowy black dress with a bedazzled peter pan collar. “How did this end up here? This is  _ mine. _ ” She stripped down to her bra and underwear and quickly tossed the dress on. It fit perfectly, albeit a bit fancy for a ravine party. That dress didn’t really scream  _ stale cigarettes and bonfire smoke _ , but it also didn’t make Lola look  _ too  _ much like she was smuggling a watermelon under her dress, so this outfit was definitely an improvement. 

Frankie’s phone buzzed. 

‘ _ See u soon’  _ A text from Esme read. __

_ 'Ok _ ’ Frankie typed back, trying and failing to keep her cool and pretend the rift between her and Esme wasn’t bugging her. 

Frankie knew she shouldn’t be playing immature games again. That was one of her biggest faults in her relationships with Winston and Jonah. She was hoping to clear the air with Esme this evening -- she just needed to figure out the best way to get her back on her side. And figure out what was  _ really _ going on between them in the first place.

Since Frankie had sort of snapped at Esme while they were at the sushi restaurant, their text conversations had gotten a bit dry. She allowed herself to scroll through her texts with Esme, going back through and scanning their conversations for the last month. Anything Frankie and Esme talked about could get them going off on an hour-long tangent. Conversation just  _ flowed _ between the two. Frankie and Esme definitely didn’t always agree on everything, but they were able to discuss their differences without conflict for the most part. They were able to shed the versions of themselves that they put up as a charade in order to fit in and just  _ be _ . Frankie had never connected with someone so easily like this before...she didn’t want to lose this, whatever it was.

Another text from Esme popped up on Frankie’s screen.  _ ‘On the way, you’re driving home. I’m drinking.’ _ Frankie sighed. Drunk Esme could either be your best friend or your worst nightmare. Either way she was going to be a lot to handle.

….

Lola made her way down the staircase, her robo-baby on her hip and her hand over her baby bump as her two friends trailed behind her. She knew her attire was a bit much for the occasion, but the dress also gave her a surge of confidence. For a moment, she almost didn’t feel pregnant at all, like she was just a regular teenager going to a party with her friends. If only…

“Where are you headed looking so fancy?” Miles’ voice took Lola by surprise — she’d thought he was still at Winston’s. She normally told him everything, but she hadn’t quite figured out how to tell him she was going to a sketchy party in the ravine organized by Esme. It wasn’t that he was possessive at all, he was just… _ protective.  _ Mostly for good reason, especially with her nearing her third trimester.

“I didn’t know you’d be home.” Lola felt her cheeks get a little pink and warm. She had sort of hoped she could just slide by and mention the ravine party to Miles  _ after _ the fact. It was easier to ask for forgiveness than permission, Lola thought. “Taking the robo-baby on a field trip?” She wasn’t  _ technically  _ lying.

“Esme invited us to a party at the ravine. It should be no biggie,” Frankie cut in, making an attempt to save Lola, but totally not helping.

Miles sighed. “It’s bad enough that  _ you’re _ hanging out with Esme, Franks…do you really need to drag your friends and  _ my _ unborn baby into her web of deranged drama?”

“She’s actually pretty nice,” Lola softly stepped in, attempting to diffuse the spat between the Hollingsworth siblings. “She’s just been through a lot. She actually reminds me of you in a lot of ways.”

“That’s not a compliment,” Miles frowned.

“Just an observation,” Lola said, catching her breath from the stairs. The baby was squirming around again, probably because Lola was getting slightly worked up. “Why are you being a wet blanket? It’s no big deal. I’m not gonna do anything stupid.”

Miles didn’t seem any more convinced. “It’s not  _ you  _ I don’t trust, Lo. I just…do you really think this is a good idea?” His eyes softened a bit. “Can’t you just stay in with me tonight? I’ll even let you do a face mask on me,” he tried.

Lola hesitated for a moment. She got where Miles was coming from, and she didn’t want him to worry. But he was starting to sound way too much like her dad here. She just wanted to forget all the serious stuff and have fun for  _ one  _ night — what was so wrong about that? It’s not like she was going to drink or smoke or do anything to put the baby in danger. And frankly, Lola kind of felt like her being pregnant didn’t suddenly give Miles or  _ anyone _ a right to tell her what to do. “Miles, we’ve got  _ years  _ of staying in ahead of us,” she said, stating the obvious. “Sorry, but…I’m going with my friends.”

Miles sighed, looking slightly resigned. Lola knew he wasn’t one to make a scene when everyone was watching --  _ anymore _ , at least. His angst had recently been replaced with anxiety about every facet of Lola’s pregnancy and what the future held. Lola had noticed a change in Miles’ reactions to things and the fights he chose not to pick now. It wasn’t a negative change, but there was definitely a marked difference. A few months ago, Miles caused a huge commotion at the Cantina. Lola could have never imagined the troublemaking, cute older brother of her best friend would turn out so… _ responsible _ . “I  _ really  _ wish you wouldn’t, Lo,” Miles said with gritted teeth, getting his point across in just a simple sentence.

“Do you see  _ me _ telling you not to go to Winston’s?” Lola shot back. Frankie and Shay were staring and whispering amongst themselves, but Lola didn’t really care. “If  _ you _ wanted to go to some dumb thing in the ravine, I’d be cool with it.”

“That’s not the same thing, and you know it,” Miles said, sounding exasperated. “I just want you to be  _ safe _ .”

“So I suddenly need your permission now?” Lola raised her voice slightly, feeling herself getting carried away. She didn’t like arguing with Miles like this, but something,  _ everything  _ lately, was just eating at her tonight. “It’s bad enough that my dad and everyone at school and work act like I’m made of glass. I don’t need  _ you  _ doing it too. You of all people should understand what it’s like to have people using the pity voice on you and treating you like-”

Frankie cleared her throat awkwardly, interrupting Lola’s little impromptu monologue. “Uh, I think Esme’s here…” she said, reading a text on her phone.

Lola nodded and tore her eyes away from her boyfriend. She didn’t  _ want  _ to leave in a fight with Miles, but she really didn’t have the energy to continue this conversation right now. “Let’s not keep our ride waiting then,” she said to Frankie and Shay. She took a deep breath. “Look, I’ll…I’ll call you later, Miles. Don’t wait up worrying about me.” 

“Lola…” Miles said, but she was already headed towards the door.

“ _ Don’t worry, I’ll keep her safe _ ,” Frankie called out to Miles, the robo-baby in her arms already screaming. 

Lola threw one last glance Miles’ way. For a second, she almost wanted to turn back. But instead she just followed Frankie and Shay out the door.


	33. Chapter 33

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frankie tries to figure things out with Esme, but Esme has other plans. The ravine party takes a disastrous turn.

“I call shotgun!” Lola exclaimed the moment the three girls exited the Hollingsworth house and began walking toward Esme’s car. 

Frankie shot Lola a look. “But…” she started, but didn’t quite know what to say. She didn’t know exactly how she was going to handle this Esme conflict, but she knew she wanted things resolved before they arrived at the ravine. That was the only way that Frankie could try to redirect Esme from getting far too drunk, which was what happened nearly _every_ time Esme drank. “I wanted to talk to Esme.”

“Sorry, I need the extra space,” Lola explained as she opened the passenger door. “The backseat is way too cramped. You can still talk to Esme from the back.” 

Lola wasn’t wrong, but Frankie was much less likely to have a productive conversation with Esme when the only eye contact they could make was through the rearview mirror. Frankie sighed, though, accepting what she could not control and hopping into Esme’s backseat along with Shay. Hopefully Frankie could just pull Esme aside before she found the keg and make things right. 

Esme began blasting music the moment girls got in the car. She began playing one of Drake’s hits — a song which Frankie had previously said she would rather puke than listen to again. Frankie guessed this was a subtle hint to how Esme was feeling about Frankie in this particular moment. Esme’s feelings seemed to change with the weather. This wasn’t something Frankie necessarily minded, she just wished Esme would let her in enough to help sometimes. Frankie had helped her through her breakup with Zig and Esme had done the same in regards to Frankie’s breakup with Jonah. They had grown pretty close over the past few months. The current state of their communication was kinda killing Frankie. 

Frankie sighed as she settled into Esme’s backseat, looking over at Shay to gauge her reaction. Shay was _not_ happy to be in Esme’s car. Before the three friends had gone downstairs Shay had remarked that she didn’t want to get in Esme’s ‘sex-mobile’. Frankie just shushed Shay. At times she wanted to react with snark like Esme would, but it just wasn’t her style. 

… 

Lola observed her surroundings as Esme pulled into the ravine. There hadn’t been a point in time where Lola even _wanted_ to go to the ravine, let alone been invited. The crowd who usually hung out at the ravine were unsavory to say the least, or at least that was the reputation Lola had reaped from the rumors and gossip that surrounded them. Esme had turned out to be pretty cool, though, so maybe Lola was wrong to judge…

As Esme parked, Lola’s eyes fell on a couple leaning up against a tree making out. She squinted and made out the figures — Jonah and Grace. “ _No way_ …” Lola spoke quietly to herself. Frankie was _not_ going to take this well. 

Esme put the car in park and glanced over to what had caught Lola’s attention. “Is that…?” 

Lola looked over to Esme and quickly shushed her. Wanting to change the subject before Jonah and Grace came across Frankie’s radar, Lola quickly came up with a distraction. “Hey Esme, is Zig gonna be here?”

Esme scoffed. “Probably. Fuck him, though. It’s booze before boys tonight, after all.” Esme got out of the car and walked around to the back left seat where Frankie was still sitting. “Hey Frankie,” Esme started. Lola noticed Frankie perk up a bit. “Mind reaching under your seat and getting my bottle of vodka?” 

Frankie looked confused and a bit hurt. “Sure…” She reluctantly reached under her seat and grabbed a half-full bottle of vodka. “We just got this bottle the other day, why is it so empty?” Frankie asked. 

“I got thirsty, duh.” Esme reached over and wrapped her fingers around the neck of the bottle, removing the cap and bringing it to her mouth. “Want some, Shay?” She offered the bottle to Shay, who immediately declined. 

“I think I’m just gonna find Tiny,” Shay said as the four girls approached the party. Tiny immediately emerged from the crowd and greeted Shay, Frankie, and Lola, leaving Esme out, causing Esme to take another swig of the bottle. 

“Wanna find something to mix that with?” Frankie suggested as kindly as she could. At this rate, Esme would be blitzed before the sun started setting. Lola guessed someone else would have to be the designated driver. Lola’s lack of driver’s license took her out of the running and Shay was unlikely to want to take the chance of driving someone else’s car without insurance. That left Frankie as the only possible designated driver. 

Esme shrugged Frankie off and began walking away. Lola walked up to Frankie and placed a hand on her best friend’s shoulder. “You good?” Lola asked. 

“Yeah, I will be. I just need to figure things out with Esme…” She sort of patted Lola on the back and walked away aimlessly, presumably to go after her-... _whatever_ the hell Esme was to Frankie these days.

Lola was at least glad that Frankie seemed to have missed the sight of her ex-boyfriend with his tongue down Grace’s throat. She knew firsthand how _not_ fun it was to see your ex kissing someone else right in front of you. It had taken her a long time to get over seeing Tiny and Shay happy together — she hadn’t truly let go of her feelings for Tiny until she found Miles, someone who, despite the imperfect circumstances, was perfect for her in more ways than she’d thought possible...for the _most_ part. Lola’s stomach hurt a little bit thinking of how they’d left things before the party…

Standing alone for a moment, Lola came to a realization. “...the babies!” she exclaimed out loud to nobody in particular. She rushed back to Esme’s car and tried one of the back doors. Thank goodness Esme didn’t lock her car, Lola thought. She collected the two robo-babies and rested one on each hip. Shay was _so_ lucky her dad had agreed to watch her and Tiny’s robo-baby for a couple of hours. 

Apparently Lola was going to have to be the one who played babysitter until Frankie and Esme figured their crap out…this seemed like a small peek into Lola’s future. Less fun and more responsibility. In a few short months she’d be spending all of her quality time with a _real_ baby. Crying, spit-up and all. Her heart rate quickened a bit as she realized how overwhelmed she was at the thought. Sometimes she almost convinced herself she was ready to give birth and take full-time care of her baby, but Lola knew that was far from the truth. She still had a lot of growing up to do. 

“Hey, Shay…!” Lola called out for her other best friend and wandered towards her, desperately trying to distract from her thoughts. It felt like literally _everyone_ was staring at her. She was the only one with blue hair, a baby bump, and two fake babies on either side of her hips, so she guessed it wasn’t a surprise that she was a bit of a spectacle. So much for trying to blend in with the crowd and be normal for a night. She charged up to Shay and Tiny, not really caring if she was interrupting. “What’s up?” she said, mustering the best fake smile she could.

Tiny’s eyes widened at the fussing robo-babies on Lola’s hips. “I was just asking Shay about your guys’ _chauffeur_ over there,” he said, throwing a glance in the distance towards Esme. She was dancing with a solo cup and definitely looked more than a little blitzed already. Honestly, Lola was envious of how much of a good time Esme seemed to be having compared to the rest of them. If Lola weren’t pregnant, she’d probably have double of whatever Esme was drinking.

“Don’t look at me,” Shay said. “Frankie’s the one who’s so smitten with Esme. She’s _so_ clingy.”

Tiny seemed amused. “Mhmm. Because _you’re_ not at all,” he teased, pulling Shay from Lola and placing a kiss on her lips. 

Lola just looked down at the ground. Both robo-babies started crying. This was _not_ how she’d been hoping to spend her evening. “Thank god I’m not having twins…” Lola said frantically.

“So, uh...where’s Miles?” Tiny asked Lola. She couldn’t tell if he was genuinely asking or if he was just looking for a way to get rid of her and be alone with his girlfriend. Tiny definitely cared about her as a friend still, but there was no denying these circumstances were, well, _weird._

“Oh, he’s just uh, busy tonight,” Lola said quickly. She shushed the robo-babies and tried to keep up a fake smile. “We’re good, though! He’s good, I’m good, the baby’s good...totally good. Everything is good, good, good.” 

Tiny seemed to be able to sense that something else was going on. Despite the fact that they had been broken up for what seemed like forever, Tiny could still read Lola like a book. “Are you sure you’re okay? This doesn’t really seem like your scene anyway…” It was true, Lola was much more of a _kick back at home with a variety of snacks and a romcom_ type of gal. The ravine, where people were drinking and smoking and hooking up in gross vans with shag carpet, was far from her scene. 

“I’ll be fine, I promise.” Lola said, though she wasn’t sure if she truly meant it. She just didn’t want to be a third wheel all night. “You guys have fun. I’m gonna go find somewhere to sit. My feet are already killing me.” 

Lola wandered sort of aimlessly around the ravine party, looking for someone or something to distract herself. She _really_ hadn’t expected to be ditched by her friends the moment she arrived. 

“Hey, you’re the pregnant chick!” A greasy looking boy with stringy blonde hair and a cigarette hanging from his lips put a hand on Lola’s shoulder. “From Degrassi! I saw the video you posted a few months back.”

Lola backed away slightly, shrugging his hand off her shoulder. “Uh, yeah...that’s me.” 

“You looked hot,” he stated, his eyes moving down to stare at Lola’s chest. “Still do. Wanna hang out? Maybe have a beer?” 

“Uh, no?” Lola responded. “I’m _pregnant_.” She gripped the two robo-babies she was holding close to her chest, blocking the creep’s view. “Plus I have a boyfriend.”

“It’s not that serious,” he mumbled, stumbling away toward the next girl who was wandering around by herself. 

Lola needed to find someone to talk to _pronto._ Being alone at a party like this could be dangerous. Part of her wanted to call Miles and ask him to pick her up, but that would be admitting she was wrong, which she sort of sucked at. Her eyes scanned the party for familiar faces. Her eyes fell on Zig and Maya… _nope._ She had never been too close to Zig and Maya, even when she was dating Tiny. 

“Aren’t they just _adorable_?” 

Lola turned around to find a drunk Esme just inches from her, staring straight ahead at Zig and Maya, who seemed to be having a _great_ time together. Esme was clearly not taking this well. “Aren’t you just _so_ happy for them?” she continued to rant to Lola, her breath reeking of booze. “They get to have their happy little ending and ride off into the sunset away from the crazy bitch. Isn’t that just _great?_ ” She let out an almost deranged sounding laugh, then took another swig of her drink. 

While Lola could understand where Esme was coming from in this little rant, she admittedly had zero idea of how to handle drunk Esme in this situation. She was all for letting a girl vent, but the last thing they needed was a big scene. “What about Frankie?” Lola tried to divert the conversation.

Esme didn’t even blink. “What about her?”

“She cares about you, a lot,” Lola said. She honestly had no idea what she was doing or if Frankie would even want her to butt in like this, but she was tired of seeing the two of them going back and forth and hurting each other when their feelings were _so_ damn obvious. “How do you not see that? She seriously never shuts up about you. She’d do _anything_ for you Esme, and you’re standing here crying over stupid _Zig_. He’s not even that cute!”

Esme just stared down at the ground, seemingly absorbing Lola’s words. For a moment, Lola kind of regretted saying anything at all. She just wanted Frankie to be _happy_. And...Esme, for all her quirks, made Frankie happy. She just wished they would quit fighting and see things clearly…probably a hypocritical position to take considering she was currently fighting with Miles, but still. “You wanna take a shot with me?” Esme said after a minute. “Booze over boys, right?”

Lola let out a groan, though it came out sounding like a laugh. “ _Why_ does everyone keep forgetting I can’t drink?”

It took Esme a minute to grasp what Lola was saying. “Oh...oh, right! You’re knocked up. Right. Okay, well, more for me, then. But the second you pop that baby out, you’re drinking with me.”

“I’ll tell my doctor that,” Lola rolled her eyes, but laughed. She shoved Esme and Frankie’s robo-baby in Esme’s arms. “Now, will you watch your robo-baby yourself? I’ve got enough babysitting in my future.”

A mischievous smirk crept over Esme’s face. “You know what? I think it’s time for a party game.”

…

Frankie had gotten caught up in a dull conversation with a boy from her science class who was tightly rolling weed into a joint and telling Frankie a story about how his boss at the mechanic shop was the one who sold him the drugs. Frankie didn’t really care to listen or ask questions -- she was too caught up thinking about Esme. No matter how much she tried to distract herself, Frankie's worry for Esme was consuming her.

“So, you want a hit?” the boy asked, running his fingers through his hair which Frankie perceived as an attempt to flirt. “I’m about to light this thing up and I’d be stoked to share it with you.” 

The thought of flirting with this boy -- or most any boy, sounded completely dreadful to Frankie. It wasn’t like she’d suddenly stopped being attracted to guys just because she’d kissed a girl. It was just…nobody else in the world seemed to make her feel the way Esme did. “I think I’ll pass. I gotta find someone.” Frankie eyed the joint once more, slightly tempted to take a hit to calm her nerves before she tried to search for Esme. She decidedly shook her head and walked away, toward a bigger crowd of teens that had begun to form.

“You know what? I think it’s time for a party game.” Esme’s voice was the loudest in the crowd. _This_ couldn’t be good. “I don’t see any bottles to spin, so I vote _truth or dare_.” 

Frankie thought back to the last time Esme had started up a game of truth or dare at Frankie’s house. Things had changed so much since then. Frankie was still with Jonah, thinking they were about to have sex while Esme was curled up to Zig trying to cause trouble between Shay, Lola and Tiny. Frankie was not ready for another chaotic night like that. From what Frankie gathered and remembered, that was the night Lola and Miles had sex as well. Frankie felt pretty comfortable knowing that nobody she cared about would sneak off to the gross van that sat in the ravine to get pregnant. There was still so much chaos that could ensue, however, so Frankie definitely still felt anxiety taking over her chest and sitting on it like a gigantic boulder. 

“What if we just --” Frankie started and saw Esme look over to her, then back to her main focus…Zig and Maya. This was bound to be messy. 

“What if we just _what_?” Esme scoffed slightly, her tone getting harsher with each word. “Didn’t know you wanted to talk to me.”

“Come on, E…” Frankie attempted to appeal to her, but Esme had a clear goal. She took the robo-baby from Esme’s arms and sighed. “Fine. Let me start. Lola, truth or dare?”

Frankie knew Lola _also_ didn’t want to fan the flames of Esme’s drama. “Uh, truth?” Lola responded, clearly a bit uncomfortable being roped in. 

“What is the weirdest pregnancy craving you’ve had?” Frankie asked an innocent question.

“Oh, easy!” Lola perked up. “Fried ice cream! It’s on the menu at the Cantina so I used to get a serving every time I was there as a kid. I was craving it a couple weeks back at like 11 o’clock though and my dad whipped some up in the kitchen.” Lola smiled, easily distracted from the drama that had just been occurring. “Do I have to…? _Oh!"_ Lola remembered suddenly that she had to ask someone truth or dare as well. “Shay! Truth or dare?”

“Truth,” Shay said decidedly. 

“ _Of course,_ ” Esme scoffed. 

Lola and Shay both sort of disregarded Esme’s snide remarks. “Umm, what’s Tiny’s worst bad habit?” Lola asked. 

Esme interjected again, “Can we make this game a bit more _interesting?_ This isn’t middle school.” 

Frankie did _not_ like the look in Esme’s eyes. She knew that look — the one that came before Esme snapped and said something totally out of bounds. The calm before the storm, if you will. “Tiny,” Esme said, apparently just taking it upon herself to take over Lola’s turn, “who’s better in bed, Shay or Lola?”

If Frankie had been drinking something, she would have spit it out or choked right then. Several gasps and giggles escaped from the people around them. Shay and Lola both looked beyond uncomfortable and Tiny looked like he wanted to disappear. 

“Why would you even go there?” Lola shook her head at Esme, a fair amount of anger, and a little hurt, in her voice. She grabbed her robo-baby and walked off in a huff, not particularly headed anywhere except away from Esme.

“I’m over this game,” Shay followed her, seemingly just as pissed. Tiny started to get up, but Zig grabbed his sleeve and pulled him back down.

“Guys, wait..!” Frankie honestly felt embarrassed for dragging her friends into this. She knew that Lola had never even gone past second base with Tiny, and Shay, for all Frankie knew, was still too scared to even _discuss_ sex with Tiny. But still, why did Esme always have to go over the top and make everyone uncomfortable like this? 

Frankie always tried to give her the benefit of the doubt, but she was beginning to see why people were so wary of her getting involved with Esme. “What the _hell_ , Esme?” Frankie raised her voice slightly. She wondered if she should go after Lola and Shay, but she also really didn’t want to leave Esme alone in this state. 

Frankie knew Esme was better than this. She’d _seen_ the good side of her — the Esme who kept Lola’s secret, who brought Frankie her favorite pretzels and mustard just because she was having a bad day, who loved Zig so fiercely that she would have done anything to keep him, who sobbed so, so hard in Frankie’s arms the night they found Maya on the roof. She knew Esme was capable of being awesome. So why was she trying so hard to hurt everyone now?

“Oh, lighten up. I’m just trying to have fun,” Esme shot back, unfazed as she sipped on her bottle. She was definitely not in _any_ shape to be driving home tonight. “Zig, truth or dare?” Esme dared to say.

Zig awkwardly stumbled over his words, physically distancing himself from Maya as Esme stared him down. “Uh…dare?”

Esme smirked as she heard his response. “You were never very good at telling the truth anyway, I guess.” She took another swig of the bottle, which was getting dangerously close to empty. Frankie was going to need to do something _soon._ “I dare you to kiss Maya.” 

Zig furrowed his brows slightly. “Why would you dare me to do that, Esme?” 

“You know you want to. You’ve wanted to _forever._ I was just a cheap, easy replacement til’ she got her shit together and wanted you again,” Esme said.

“I don’t think this is...” Zig scrambled to find the right words. “You need help.” He was probably meaning to sound sympathetic, but his words just came out sounding mean. 

“I _do not_ need help. You were always an idiot anyway.” Esme was clearly spiraling and trying to hurt Zig at this point. “Just kiss her.” 

Frankie wanted to pull her away from this whole situation, but before she could stand up and interrupt the moment…Zig planted a kiss on Maya’s lips. The kiss wasn’t anything to write home about, but it was a kiss nonetheless. A kiss Esme was clearly hoping Zig wouldn’t dare to plant. 

Frankie watched Esme’s face fall. Esme seemed to have gotten in a bit over her head, and now she was hurting. One last swig emptied the bottle Esme had been working on. “Who’s next?” Esme slurred. 

Zig looked uncomfortable and a bit offended by the _‘idiot’_ comment, but Maya held onto his arm and silently calmed him down. His eyes examined the crowd of teens and fell on Frankie. “Truth or dare, Frankie?” 

_Oh no,_ Frankie thought. The last thing she needed right now was to get involved in this. She hesitated, looking to Esme before she spoke. Esme’s crazy drama train was off the rails but Esme couldn’t give less of a crap. _This_ was when she started getting destructive — which scared Frankie. 

“Truth,” Frankie replied reluctantly. 

“Of course. Same boring Frankie as always,” Esme jabbed. 

Frankie was getting pissed off and concerned at the same time. Through gritted teeth she looked at Zig, who shrugged. Nobody knew exactly what to do with Esme in this situation. 

Frankie’s eyes darted across the circle at the boy who had offered her a joint earlier. She watched as he lit the joint and slowly inhaled. Frankie felt something come over her and she grabbed the joint right out of the boy’s hands. 

“You want boring…?” she said to Esme. Marijuana was what Miles used when he was attempting to shed the stress of their father’s continual involvement in their life. That was of course before Miles spiraled into a pill addiction with the help of Esme. Miles seemed to feel pretty chill when he smoked weed, something Frankie recalled as she took a harsh hit of the joint. She tried to mimic what she saw Miles do as he floated in the pool, too high to care about anything — but she instantly started coughing. The robo-baby in her arms shrieked in response, causing everyone to laugh. Great. She set the baby on the log next to her, trying her best to catch her breath. 

“Wow,” Esme said, pretending to be all impressed. “ _S_ _o edgy,_ aren’t you?” 

Frankie was about ready to ditch Esme and hitchhike home. She took another hit of the joint just to prove her point, this time inhaling without coughing. “Why are you being such a-”

Before Frankie could finish that sentence, Zig spoke up again, “Frankie! You chose truth, right? You never let me ask my question.” Frankie hadn’t noticed before, but he seemed sort of drunk and out of it too. Not nearly on the level of Esme, but definitely not sober. “Are you into Esme?” he asked. _Why_ did Zig need to go there?

Frankie took a deep breath, looking over to Esme. Their eyes locked and Frankie hesitated for a moment, not because she didn’t like Esme, but because she _really_ didn’t want to do this when Esme was drunk in the middle of a ravine. Frankie had come to the realization that she liked...maybe even _loved_ Esme in _some_ way weeks ago, but other than their romantically charged moment on the roof minutes before they were traumatized for life and a few flirty moments, she didn’t truly know how Esme felt. The last thing she wanted was more public humiliation. 

Frankie was starting to feel kind of out of it, like it was difficult to form any coherent thoughts. Probably the high kicking in, but also just the _pressure_ of this situation. Admitting she liked Esme and having the implication of the whole crowd thinking it was _like_ _that_ was risky and scary -- but so was saying that she just liked Esme as a friend. That would be a straight up lie, first of all, and she didn’t want Esme to even _hear_ those words. She knew Esme, and if there was a chance that she felt the same way, such a public rejection would set her level of trust back and make their foundation crumble before they even truly started. So instead Frankie just sat there in silence, completely frozen. “I…” Frankie started, but couldn’t even begin to form any words. 

Before Frankie or anyone could say anything else, Esme took off running and disappeared into the darkening woods. 


	34. Chapter 34

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frankie and Esme have an eye-opening conversation.

Lola and Shay sat on a bench just far enough away from the crowd, mostly silent. They had definitely come a long way since that night Esme had dared Lola to go into the closet with Tiny, but it still kind of felt like Esme’s question had opened up old wounds between them. _So_ much could change in a year, Lola thought to herself. Everything just felt overwhelming and confusing. 

“I’ve never felt better about being _completely_ sober.” Shay broke the silence with a remark. Lola noticed she didn’t quite make eye contact with her as she spoke. 

“Me too.” Lola shifted the robo-baby in her arms. She honestly wanted to place the baby on the damn ground already. Nicely, of course, with a soft blanket underneath. Her arms were just tired and her maternal instincts were _not_ kicking in at this moment. 

Lola’s phone vibrated. She quickly pulled it out of her pocket and noticed Miles’ name on her caller ID. She could _not_ handle this call right now… _declined_ for now. Not that she thought Miles would chew her out or do anything unpleasant, but she just wasn’t quite ready to admit she was wrong yet. Her father always said she got her stubborn streak from her mom.

“Are you guys fighting?” Shay questioned. 

“I dunno,” Lola said, not fully feeling like she wanted to open up about it right now. She stared at her phone lockscreen, a picture of her latest ultrasound. She felt familiar flutters in her belly, putting her hand on top of the spot where she was feeling it the most. Something about knowing her baby was in there and growing day by day always gave Lola a reason to keep going. Imagining Miles’ sparkling eyes on a tiny baby’s head… _ugh,_ it made her heart skip a beat. “Hey...feel _this_ ,” Lola tried to change the subject. 

Shay reached over and touched Lola’s belly. Her eyes widened. “Oh! I think your baby might have hiccups. This is exactly what it felt like when my cousin was pregnant,” Shay said. “Hiccups are more rhythmic. Like…” Shay waited a moment and Lola felt another slight spasm in her stomach. “That! That was totally a hiccup!” She and Lola shared a glance and both giggled. This was _not_ how they’d expected their night at the ravine to end up.

Lola smiled as she felt another hiccup happen within a few seconds. There were slight differences between the way this felt from the kicks that she had slowly gotten used to. Her heart softened and for a second, she almost forgot everything she was stressing over. “I hate having hiccups, but...I _love_ these.” She felt like she’d cherish this moment forever — even if it was happening in a gross dingy ravine surrounded by teenage burnouts. 

Shay returned her smile. “We’re cool, right? You know, with Tiny and everything?” she addressed the elephant in the room. 

“You know I don’t like him like that anymore, right?” Lola wanted to confirm the obvious. “I mean…I’ve clearly moved on.” She gestured down to her pregnant state. “We’ve come a long way since that girls’ night. I don’t ever want anything, or any boy, to get between us ever again. I just...I really need my girls, _especially_ now.” As grateful as Lola was to have Frankie as her baby’s aunt, it was also really important to her that her baby had Shay in his or her life too, like another aunt. “You’ll always be here — right?” She just felt like she needed a bit of reassurance tonight. “Auntie Shay?” 

“Of course. _Always_ ,” Shay said warmly, her hand still on Lola’s stomach. “Is it weird for me to keep my hand here?” 

Lola shrugged, letting out a soft laugh. “If it is, who cares? I’m already a pregnant teenager at a lame ravine party with a robo-baby.” 

“Speaking of…” Shay looked across the ravine where the truth or dare game was still taking place. Esme and Frankie were nowhere in sight, but their robo-baby sat alone on a log between two random teenagers. “Want me to go grab Frankie and Esme’s baby before they get an ‘F?’” 

Lola slipped her feet out of her shoes and nodded. “Yes, please. _Ay dios mio_ , my feet are so swollen, I don’t think I can walk another step!” She was being dramatic of course, but her swollen feet and ankles were no joke. That was probably one of her least favorite pregnancy symptoms. She smiled as she felt the baby hiccup again, suddenly feeling a little more hopeful about everything. At least there were _some_ perks to carrying a tiny human inside of her.

…

Frankie was definitely feeling a bit stoned as she ran through the woods. Everything around her was sort of spinning and hazy. Just like the first time she got drunk at a birthday party with her fellow interns, she never seemed to know when to stop before she got too messed up to act normal. _Way to go, Frankie_. “Esme!” she called out. She continued to follow, but Esme was cutting through the trees surprisingly fast. “Stop running!”

Frankie felt like her thoughts were truly racing now. What if this was all in her head and she’d really just gotten obsessed with her best friend? Maybe Esme didn’t see her that way…the way Esme had kissed her made Frankie feel pretty sure this was real between them, but Esme’s feelings had fluctuated in about fifty different directions since they kissed on the roof that night. 

So many things were happening at the time. Maybe Frankie was just a fleeting thought in Esme’s mind that night? A way to gain love and attention when she was feeling crappy about Zig? Whatever the case was, Frankie quickly came to the conclusion that she didn’t care. No matter the circumstances… “Esme, stop! I _do_ care about you, okay?”

“Care… _how_ ?” A tearful Esme finally turned around and stepped toward Frankie. “I’m so sick of everyone _using_ me and not really loving me. Zig didn’t even _try_ to deny that I was just a replacement for Maya. Someone he could _use_.” 

“Why do you still care what Zig says? Like you said, he’s an idiot.” Frankie didn’t really think that, but she knew she needed to side with Esme right now to get her to listen. “He’s your ex and he treated you like crap.” 

“He’s the only one who…” Esme’s face was full of tears. She was breaking down and completely panicking and she didn’t even seem to know why. “He just…”

Frankie wrapped her arms around Esme’s body. “Hey. _Hey._ It’s okay. I’m here for you.” Esme sobbed in Frankie’s arms for a moment before pulling away to look her in the eyes. 

Something about the way Esme locked eyes with her in that moment just put Frankie into a trance, one much more powerful than any joint could cause. She _had_ to kiss Esme right this moment. She leaned closer and kissed Esme with all the intent and passion she had in her body. 

Esme kissed her right back, cupping Frankie’s jaw in her hands. Their lips touched softly for about a minute more, the girls looking into one another’s eyes with every few kisses. Frankie slipped the hair tie that held Esme’s hair and released it, letting her tightly braided hair fall from the side of her shoulder to her back. Frankie kept on kissing her, slowly combing her fingers through Esme’s hair as she pulled her close. This wasn’t like anybody Frankie had ever kissed before. This was intense and passionate and... _real._

Frankie slowly pulled away, not because she wanted to stop kissing, but because she needed to speak. “Esme...I want to be with you.”

Esme let out a soft laugh under her breath and shook her head. “You don’t really want that. Not after seeing how crazy I _really_ am…”

“Don’t tell me what I want,” Frankie said clumsily, the words just spilling out at this point. She put her hand on Esme’s shoulder. “And don’t call yourself crazy. I’m all kinds of messed up too. I mean, you’ve seen my family. You know how much I screwed up last year. You’ve seen the worst of me too. Esme, I don’t _care_ about what you’ve done or what people say. I like you. More than I’ve ever liked anyone.” There was another word for what she was feeling that was stronger than “like,” but Frankie couldn’t quite let it roll off her tongue yet. Sure, she’d said “ _I love you”_ in the heat of the moment on the roof that night, but now the stakes felt much higher. Now she knew what she was feeling was _real._

Esme absorbed this for a minute. She reached out for Frankie’s hand, a sense of hope restored in her beautiful brown eyes as they locked with Frankie’s. “Okay,” she said softly, sounding slightly scared, but calm now. 

Frankie knew this wasn’t going to fix everything in Esme’s life or hers — she’d learned by now that just getting into a relationship and anchoring yourself to someone couldn’t solve your problems. But holding Esme’s hand like this just felt... _right._

Esme used her other hand to wipe her tears away, her expression softening. “I’m sorry I was such a bitch tonight. I should probably apologize to Lola before she totally hates me.”

Frankie raised her brow. “Shay too,” she added.

Esme scoffed, but obliged. “Fine, I _guess_ Shay too…” She froze suddenly and let out a large gasp, and it sent alarm bells off in Frankie’s head again.

“... _What?_ ” Frankie said, a bit paranoid. She wasn’t sure she was cut out for this whole smoking in the ravine scene after all. 

“Where’d you leave the robo-baby?” Esme said, and both she and Frankie burst into laughter. 

_Way to go, Frankie,_ she thought to herself again. When Frankie told Esme she was all kinds of messed up too, she’d meant it. Thank _god_ they weren’t going to be parents themselves anytime soon.


	35. Chapter 35

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things don't go as planned as the group's night at the ravine wraps up.

“Do we have everything we need?” Shay asked Lola, trying to take inventory of the few items they had brought. The party was finally winding down and both girls were eager to go home.

“Everything but Frankie and Esme.” Lola remarked, two robo-babies placed perfectly on her hips. She was starting to get used to this, though she was definitely glad she wasn’t having twins. “I’m getting a little bit worried about them…” 

“I would worry about anyone going off into the woods with _Esme_.” Shay couldn’t quite control her tone. “I mean, she’s been a little better this semester, since she started hanging with Frankie, but I still don’t trust her. Especially after tonight…”

A voice came up behind Shay, “That’s cool. I really don’t live for your approval.” Esme had appeared behind them, hand-in-hand with Frankie. 

Lola’s eyes widened slightly at the sight of the two girls holding hands. “Does this mean you guys…?” She looked to Frankie for an answer. 

“Thanks for taking care of our baby.” Frankie avoided Lola’s question with a grin and reached out to grab the robo-baby from Lola’s arms. 

Lola refused to allow Frankie to get a good grip on the baby. “Not until you tell me what happened!” she teased, but she was definitely hoping either Frankie or Esme would disclose the status of their relationship. Lola had been low-key shipping them for months. It was almost enough to make her forget that she was still kind of mad at Esme in the first place.

Shay nudged Lola. “It’s none of our bus-” 

But Esme spoke up, cutting her off. “Actually, we’re together.” Esme squeezed Frankie’s hand, truly seeming happy for once without any conflict. 

Frankie nodded in agreement, blushing slightly. “Together — whatever that means.” She pulled Esme’s hand up to her mouth and placed a small kiss on the top of her hand. “And _whatever it takes._ ” 

Lola scrunched her nose and made a face, pretending to be disgusted. “Blegh, PDA.”

Frankie rolled her eyes, but laughed. “Oh please, look who’s talking,” she said, gesturing toward Lola’s baby bump. She seemed slightly out of it — Lola was mildly concerned for a second, but then decided to chalk it up to what a whirlwind of a night this had been. 

Shay yawned, seemingly not as invested in this whole Esme and Frankie thing as Lola, especially the _Esme_ part. “Do you guys wanna get going? It’s getting kind of late…” Lola trailed off with a yawn. It wasn’t _that_ late, but Lola was getting pretty tired, plus her feet were still swollen and the baby was still hiccuping. Plus, maybe it was time she finally called Miles back…

“Fine by me. I’m ready to blow this party,” Esme reached into her jacket pocket and tossed Frankie her car keys. Esme had sobered up since the truth or dare game, but she was _definitely_ still not sober enough to be driving any of them, especially Lola and her unborn baby.

Frankie cleared her throat and turned to Esme sternly. “But first, is there something you want to say to Lola and Shay, Esme?” 

Esme sighed, but gave in. “I’m sorry for being a bitch tonight,” she mumbled, mostly directing it at Lola, but seemingly making herself acknowledge Shay with eye contact for a second too. “Won’t happen again. Well, it probably will. But I won’t ask _that_ truth again, unless…”

Lola put her hand up. “Okay, good enough.” She really just wanted to get home at this point and rest her feet. She watched as Frankie planted a kiss on Esme’s cheek and smiled, just feeling relieved that her best friend was happy and that the “will they/won’t they” saga had finally come to a satisfactory conclusion.

After Shay said goodbye to Tiny and they packed up the robo-babies and all their stuff, the four girls piled into Esme’s car. Lola climbed into the passenger seat, her robo-baby cradled in her lap, and turned to Frankie. “Are you sure you’re good to drive?” she said, just wanting to check. “I mean, you weren’t drinking, right?”

Frankie nodded, but still seemed slightly out of it as she reached for the reverse. “Yeah, I’m totally good! I’m just--” 

_BAM!_

Before Frankie could even finish her sentence, she drove straight into a pole.

.....

_“Frankie…!”_

Frankie just sat there frozen and still gripping the wheel for a second, Lola’s scared voice ringing through her ears as she stared straight ahead. Frankie didn’t know what happened — she had meant to hit reverse, but her arm must have reached for “drive” instead. Maybe in part due to Esme’s car being set up a bit differently than hers, but also definitely because that joint clearly hadn’t worn out of her system yet the way she’d thought it had. _Fucking fuck._ “Are you guys okay?!” Frankie cried, turning to the backseat to check on Esme and Shay. Everyone was shaken up, but nobody seemed to have a scratch on them, thank God. The same probably wasn’t true of the front exterior of Esme’s car, though...

“We’re fine,” Shay assured Frankie, though she was clearly startled. “What _happened_?”

Esme let out a loud groan. “Shit, my dad is _not_ going to be happy about that dent…” Frankie couldn’t help but think it said something that Esme’s dad’s first instinct apparently was to yell about the dent in his car rather than care about his daughter being okay. She hadn’t met her girlfriend’s father yet, but based on the stories Esme had relayed her, she wasn’t particularly eager to — even less so now. 

Frankie turned to Lola frantically. “Lo? _You okay?_ ” Frankie was already beating herself up for this, but she really couldn’t take the idea that she could have put Lola or the baby in danger. Dammit, why had she hit that joint more than once when she knew she was designated driver for the night? She knew Miles used to drive them to school stoned all the time. He had caused a far worse accident a few years ago under similar circumstances, but she also knew her brother likely wouldn’t be quick to understand and forgive her for possibly putting his girlfriend and baby at risk like this. “I’m so sorry…”

“Yeah, I’m okay,” Lola confirmed shakily. She had her hand laid over her stomach, as if instinctively protecting her baby. “I mean, I’m pretty sure. But...you don’t think...do you think the baby’s fine?” There was a slight panic in her voice. 

Shay spoke up from the back. “We should probably bring you to a doctor,” she said, always the most rational one. “Just to check. I’m sure your baby’s fine, but I’ve heard stories from my mom and it’s better to be safe than sorry. She said you’re _always_ supposed to go to the doctor’s if you get into an accident while you’re pregnant.”

“But this was barely even an accident,” Frankie responded, unintentionally letting out a nervous laugh under her breath. “I mean, I just hit a pole. None of us are injured or anything...right?”

“I completely hate to say it, but Shay has a point,” Esme said, never missing a chance to subtly take a jab at someone. “You _are_ supposed to go to a doctor. It’s important to make sure there’s no damage to the placenta...or something like that,” she kind of trailed off at the end. Frankie stared at her girlfriend for a second, wanting to ask how and why she knew this bit of information, but decided to let it go. 

Lola shrugged at Frankie meekly. “Couldn’t hurt to check, right?”

“I’ll call my dad and see if he can pick us up,” Shay said, already pulling out her phone. “My mom’s working a shift right now, maybe she can even squeeze you in for a quick checkup, Lo…”

Frankie nodded reluctantly, knowing she didn’t have much of a choice in the matter. Just a few moments ago, she’d felt like she was on cloud nine with Esme, and now her stomach felt like it was tied in a thousand knots. Now there were a million things to worry about: the baby being okay, how to explain the damage to Esme’s car, and the matter that she wasn’t exactly sober the way she’d told Lola. She’d really outdone herself this time, in true Hollingsworth fashion.

 _Way to go Frankie,_ she thought to herself again. _Way to go._


	36. Chapter 36

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shay takes Lola to get a checkup after the crash.

“I _really_ need to call Miles back,” Lola pleaded as Shay’s father dropped her and Shay off at the emergency room door. Frankie had wanted to tag along to see that Lola was okay, but all the girls couldn’t all fit in Shay’s dad’s car, so Frankie and Esme had stayed at the ravine with the car and the robo-babies for the time being.

The entire car ride had been filled with Mr. Powers asking Shay to recount every moment that led up to the accident, meaning Lola hadn’t gotten a quiet moment to call her boyfriend yet to let him know what was going on. Lola knew Miles was definitely going to panic hearing that she had been in any sort of accident — she wondered if maybe Frankie had already called him, but really hoped he wouldn’t be hearing about this secondhand. 

Shay wrapped her arm around Lola with a blanket she had grabbed from the backseat of the car. Lola clung to the blanket and leaned onto Shay’s shoulder. 

“I think I’m good,” Lola said, partly to reassure Shay, but also to convince herself. A part of her brain was definitely eating at her wondering if the minor collision could have possibly caused any harm to her baby. If Lola was honest, this was one of the first times this whole mom feeling was really _hitting_ her _._ She didn’t want to let on that she was freaking out, but not having Miles here to reassure her was really getting to her. She just needed to know that the baby was okay, that she and Miles were okay, that everything would be fine. “Can you hand me my phone so I can call Miles?”

“Let’s get you checked in first,” Shay insisted, still holding Lola’s cell phone hostage. Lola _was_ easily distracted by her phone. “It should be just a quick check to make sure you and the baby are okay. My dad said he left your dad a voicemail to let him know…”

Part of Lola was relieved that she wouldn’t have to be the one to call her father and tell him this news, but she was also seriously dreading having to face him eventually. He was _definitely_ going to be upset with her for going to a sketchy ravine party like this when she’d said she was just sleeping over at Shay’s. Lola’s father had always been somewhat strict even before she got pregnant, but he was in total overprotective mode lately. He had been terribly worried and upset with her after hearing that she had gone out for _sushi_ \-- even after Lola reassured him that she didn’t have any raw fish or anything with ‘high mercury levels’. Lola admittedly still didn’t even understand what mercury _was._ That was something Lola was sure Shay would know.

….

It didn’t take too long for Lola to get checked in at the front desk. Lola had noticed that one of the few advantages of being pregnant, especially being a pregnant _teen,_ was that people tended to hover over you and treat you with _much_ more urgency and delicacy. It normally struck Lola as a bit weird and slightly sexist, but tonight, she just wanted to be seen by a doctor as quickly as possible. Even just sitting in the waiting room, she felt like everyone around couldn’t stop looking at her. It didn’t matter who they were, it seemed like all strangers seemed to be completely unable to stop staring at Lola. Every time she left the house, she felt more and more like a spectacle. From the extra weight she was carrying in her torso to the way her cheeks had become much more puffy and chubby, she just looked undeniably pregnant.

“Alright,” Shay said, taking a seat next to Lola. “ _Now_ you can call Miles.” She handed Lola her phone, which was encased in a bedazzled gradient of pink, purple, and blue. Miles had complimented it once, pointing out that it was the same colors as the bisexual flag. Lola had initially just gotten it because she liked the colors, but she had grown to love it because of the meaning it had to her boyfriend.

Lola grabbed her phone and immediately unlocked it. She hadn’t checked her texts or socials in _hours._ It had been ages since Lola had gone so long without a status update. There were a few texts from Miles from an hour or two ago, but then _nothing._ How was it possible that he wasn’t freaking out right now at Lola’s absence? Especially with how protective he’d been about Lola going to the ravine in the first place. She was also surprised there weren’t a million messages from her father...Lola supposed he probably just hadn’t listened to the voicemail from Shay’s father yet. _That_ was going to be fun. 

Lola dialed Miles’ number and it rang twice before he picked up. “ _I’m on my way!”_ Miles said hurriedly. His tone sounded anxious and upset. Did he know already? 

“On your way…to?” Lola questioned. 

“You, of course! I’ll be there soon.” 

Lola was slightly confused. “Are you going to the ravine, or…?” She wasn’t sure who had updated him or how long ago they’d done so.

“To the hospital!” Miles exclaimed, seeming flustered and a bit frustrated that Lola was seemingly not caught up. “I’ll see you soon, Lo,” he said, then hung up promptly. 

One of the nurses walked up and cut in. “Miss Pacini, is it?” she spoke politely. 

“Yes!” Shay quickly answered. “We were just in a minor fender bender…our friend hit a _pole._ ” Shay didn’t hesitate to seize the opportunity to take over and fill the nurse in. It was probably better Shay explained things anyway. Lola was still quite a bit shaken up, especially after that brief and confusing phone conversation with Miles. 

“I can go ahead and take you back for a quick exam,” the nurse offered Lola a hand to help her stand up. It was getting harder and harder to get up from a sitting position every day…her belly was growing _so_ fast at this point. Lola couldn’t imagine three more months of growing. She already felt like her skin was stretched to its limits. “Is this your first pregnancy?” the nurse asked.

Lola was slightly taken aback. “Uh, I’m _sixteen_...” 

“You’d be surprised, honestly.” The nurse led Lola back to an examination room and opened the door, pointing to the exam table for her to sit on. She took Lola’s blood pressure, then immediately launched into questioning. “So, have you had any complications in your pregnancy so far? Any history of high risk pregnancy in your family? How about any underlying medical conditions? Any bleeding or unusual pain?” This nurse did _not_ waste time.

“Um…” Lola just sat there frozen, totally overwhelmed by all these questions. “No?” She _really_ wished she had Miles by her side to hold her hand right now. As much as she loved Shay, it just wasn’t the same as having Miles reassure her. How far away did he say he was again?

The nurse just smiled, like she thought Lola’s cluelessness was cute or something. “Mkay, well, you’re looking fine so far. Wait here and the doctor will be with you in a sec.” She stepped into the hall and closed the door behind her, leaving just Lola and Shay in the room.

Lola’s mind wandered as she waited in the cold exam room. She thought about Miles and wondered what his demeanor would be like when he arrived. She thought about her father and wondered just how long she would be grounded _this_ time. She thought about Frankie and… _why_ had she crashed the car like that? Frankie wasn’t winning any awards for her driving skills, but Lola had never witnessed her fuck up that bad when she was driving. Was she distracted because of her new relationship with Esme, or was it something else? Lola was hoping for some answers _soon._

Shay’s eyes were glued to a very detailed diagram on the wall about the third trimester. Shay had been completely calm and composed with the nurse, but now she seemed a bit pale and out of it. “I swear, I am _never_ having sex,” she remarked, barely able to tear her eyes away from the poster.

Lola rolled her eyes, her hand naturally gravitating to rub her baby bump. “Right. Does Tiny know that?” 

“I don’t know. I _think_ he knows where my mind is...” Shay didn’t sound so sure, though. “We haven’t really opened up about the specifics…it’s just so _uncomfortable._ We can talk about anything and everything else, but when it comes to that, I just _freeze.”_

Lola totally understood where Shay was coming from in that department. As awkward as it was to discuss her best friend and ex-boyfriend hooking up, it felt good for Lola to finally feel like she could be the authority on _something._ At the very least this conversation could be a distraction for now. “You guys should definitely discuss it,” she started. “I mean, Miles and I didn’t really talk beforehand and look at what happened.”

Shay tried to hide the discomfort that was playing across her features.“You and Miles were different, though. I mean, Miles was still in a relationship when you lost it.It’s not like you two had much _time_ for a talk.” Shay’s eyes flickered back to the diagram on the wall, avoiding eye contact. 

“There’s always time, unless you wanna end up like me,” Lola responded, almost feeling like she was lecturing Shay. She had to admit it felt kind of good to be the one lecturing instead of _getting_ lectured for a change. “As icky and uncomfortable as it might seem, it’s important to talk about everything _before_ you take any clothes off. You and Tiny haven’t done any of that, have you?” 

“Uh, no, we haven’t,” Shay confirmed. She was silent for a moment, then added, “Hey, can I ask you something kind of personal?”

Lola almost laughed. “You’re sitting with me in the hospital and you’re probably gonna have to watch them rub goo all over my belly. I think we’re past the point of anything being too _personal_ between us.”

Shay nodded, seemingly agreeing with Lola’s point. “How did you know Miles was the _one?_ I mean, you dated Tiny for almost a whole school year, but you guys never…” Shay gestured awkwardly, clearly still uncomfortable with this topic. “Why didn’t you? Or, why do it with Miles, then?”

“I wanna say you just know when you know, but honestly?” Lola thought about it for a moment. “I didn’t really know Miles was the one until I told him I was pregnant. Him stepping up the way he did, even though he was all tied up with Tristan and could’ve easily just walked away…that’s when I knew I could really trust and love him.” Lola got lost in thoughts and memories of Miles for a moment before snapping back to reality. “You definitely don’t want that to be the moment for you too. At least, I don’t think you do.” 

Shay shook her head furiously. “Definitely not. Pretty sure getting pregnant would disqualify me from competing in the Olympics one day…”

“It _definitely_ would,” Shay’s mom interrupted, appearing at the door of the exam room. “You’re not giving Shay ideas of matching strollers and baby showers are you, Lola?” Shay’s mother’s demeanor was always a relatively comfortable mix between friendly and stern.

“No,” Lola replied with a slight giggle. “Though now that you mention it, my baby could use a bestie. You wanna have matching baby bumps for our prom pics?”

Shay’s eyes widened, not fully grasping that Lola was teasing. “Yeah, I am so not ready for _that_ ,” Shay gestured to the graphic diagram, reminding Lola that she was _almost there…_ only weeks away from her third trimester already. 

“I know that’s not the path you want. So I trust you’ll be safe if you decide to do anything _one day_ ,” Shay’s mother advised her daughter. “Though of course…” 

_“Abstinence is the best birth control,”_ Shay chanted at the same time as her mother, completing a phrase she had clearly heard on more than one occasion. Lola wanted to laugh, but she knew better.

“That’s right,” Shay’s mother replied, seeming satisfied with her daughter for the moment. She smiled, turning back to Lola to say what she had actually come to say. “Nothing seems to be wrong with you or baby from our initial tests and checks. We’re gonna wanna do an ultrasound and some additional tests though, just to make sure. If there’s any damage to the placenta, it’s crucial to catch right away.”

“I _definitely_ want to make sure,” Lola said immediately. It dawned on her then that she didn’t even know what half of these medical terms _meant._ She wished Miles was here for these decisions, but she knew he’d be on the same page if he were there. _When_ in the world would he arrive…? 

“Do you want to wait for your parents or the father to be here or can we go ahead and set this up?” Shay’s mother asked. 

“Uh, the father… _my father…_ no…” Lola was getting her words all tripped up. “Yes. I can wait a little bit. I kinda want to grab something to eat anyway…” She realized at that moment that she hadn’t eaten anything at the ravine party. Her blood sugar was probably getting low or something. Lola still wasn’t quite sure of everything she needed to keep track of, she just knew she had to pay _way_ more attention to what was going into her body since everything she ate also went to the baby and helped with their development. It was really starting to sink in for Lola at this moment that she was actually responsible for another human now, that this was _real_ . She could hear her father’s words in her head... “ _Your baby needs to be your first priority — the first thing you think about when making any decision.”_ She hated admitting that her father was right.

“I can run to the vending machine,” Shay piped up, causing Lola to snap out of her trance. “Peanut butter cookies, right?” she asked, remembering Lola’s usual craving.

“Yes, please,” Lola managed a small smile, but still couldn’t fully relax. “Or, wait! Maybe I should get something healthier. Can you get me a protein bar or some nuts or something?” 

Lola waited until Shay had left the room, then turned to Shay’s mother. “How scared should I be?” she asked timidly.

Shay’s mother smiled politely. She’d always liked Lola, although according to Shay, she’d definitely seemed a bit _concerned_ when Shay told her about the whole pregnancy sitch. “About possible damage from the accident or having a baby in general?” 

“Both,” Lola admitted. Everything really was starting to sink in lately. She was already nervous enough after this accident, but also...knowing she would be back at this hospital in just a few short months to deliver a real, live human baby was more than a little terrifying. Even if Lola had a good support system and the best possible partner, it didn’t change that she was still just a teenager who had _no_ idea what she was doing. Although she’d agonized about her options for weeks, Lola realized that she’d really kind of made her decision to have this baby on a whim when it came down to it. She didn’t regret her choice, but it was still _scary._

“Well, there’s _some_ risk, but given how minor the accident was and your results so far, it’s unlikely there’s any harm to your baby. You _do_ need to be careful and take care of yourself, though,” Shay’s mother explained calmly, but sternly. It wasn’t hard to see where Shay got her mannerisms from. “As for the other matter...well, I won’t lie to you, you’re in a difficult position having a baby so young. I see a lot of teen moms come through here thinking everything will be easy, but it’s not. And a lot of the time, the father doesn’t stick around…” 

Shay’s mother seemed to be speaking more in general than specifically about Lola’s situation, but it still left Lola feeling a bit rattled. “Miles isn’t like that,” she said, slightly defensive. “It’s not...it’s different. He wouldn’t do that to me.” _God, where was he?_

“I’m sure he’s not,” Shay’s mother said, still just smiling politely. “This is still going to be the hardest thing you’ve ever done. Maybe the hardest thing you’ll _ever_ do.” 

Lola sighed. “No pressure, right?” she said, and giggled nervously.

“It’s a _lot_ of pressure,” Mrs. Powers spoke honestly. 

The door swung open just then and Shay walked in the room with a familiar face following closely behind. “Hey, Lo. Look what I found in the hallway.”


	37. Chapter 37

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola has an ultrasound to check on the baby with Miles by her side.

The _door swung open just then and Shay walked in the room with a familiar face following closely behind. “Hey, Lo. Look what I found in the hallway.”_

“Miles!” Lola exclaimed, feeling her heart flutter and her cheeks return to a rosy demeanor. Just seeing Miles’ face was such a calming force for Lola. He _always_ made her feel less stressed. “I’m so glad you’re here.” 

Miles approached Lola seeming a bit hesitant at first. “Have they done any tests or anything?” he asked. It seemed like he was holding back a bit. _Strange._

Shay seemed to pick up on it too, fishing the protein bar she had picked up from the vending machine from her coat’s pocket and handing it to Lola. “Mom, should we uh, go get the ultrasound ready? Or, uh, should _you_? And I’ll follow?”

Shay’s mother nodded, seeming to gage the hint. “Mhmm. I’ll be right back, Lola.” She motioned for Shay to follow her out of the exam room. 

“Thank you,” Miles said, speaking directly to Shay’s mother. Lola studied him worriedly. Why was he so _off_? Was it because of their argument earlier or the general stress of the situation? Or maybe because hospitals and crashes in general were likely a huge trigger for him...Lola hadn’t even considered that. Regardless, she just wanted to know that things were okay between them.

Shay and her mother exited the exam room, leaving Lola and Miles alone together. In all honesty, that was Lola’s favorite place to be -- alone together with Miles. “All the tests and checks so far have been fine,” Lola answered Miles’ earlier question. “Like Shay said, I’m getting an ultrasound just to make sure. Something about my placenta or something.” 

“Can I ask you a question?” Miles questioned, seeming a bit more at ease since hearing that nothing had popped up as problematic in the initial tests. “What the hell is a placenta?” 

Lola giggled, thankful for this moment of levity. “Is it bad that I don’t really know?” She scooted forward on the exam table, reaching out to Miles for a hug, which he promptly provided, thank god. “All I know is that I’m pretty sure Kim Kardashian ate hers…” 

“We are _not_ eating anything that comes out of your body,” Miles had a serious tone, but he couldn’t help but crack up. “I’m trying to be mad at you...but I can’t, and I kind of hate it. I’m really freaked out right now, to be honest.”

“Mad at me why? Because I went to the ravine party?” Lola questioned. “And me too. Completely freaked.” 

“I’m not gonna lie, I was pretty pissed when you walked out that door earlier,” Miles said. “But more than anything I was just scared. Scared I’d lose you, scared of you or the baby getting hurt…scared of something like _this_ happening…” 

“It was a freak accident. I still don’t understand how Frankie hit that pole…” 

“ _Frankie_ was the one who crashed the car?” Miles seemed surprised. Clearly he hadn’t been filled in on the details of the situation. “I just assumed it was Esme who was driving. Wait, was Frankie drunk or something? I _swear,_ if she was driving drunk…” 

Lola quickly placed a hand on Miles’ shoulder to calm him before he got too worked up. Frankie wasn’t drunk, Lola repeated to herself in her head. She would never put her and the baby in any danger like that. _It was just a freak accident...right?_ “She would never be that stupid. I didn’t see her even _pick up_ a cup. She was supposed to be the designated driver. Esme wasn’t exactly fit to drive...”

“Drunk Esme…” Miles trailed off, clearly having a quick flashback to the bender he and Esme had gone on during their junior year. “So your night was _eventful_. Esme Song plus alcohol equals disaster after all.”

“Oh, definitely,” Lola thought back to the earlier events of the evening. She desperately wanted to fill Miles in on all the craziness the evening had entailed, especially the Frankie and Esme news. Definitely not right this second though. “It was a _mess_.” 

Miles came closer. “So listen, I’m not gonna act like I’m not upset for the way that you walked out on me and completely disregarded my feelings.” He paused for a moment, then placed a kiss on her blue bangs over her forehead. “But...you’re _really_ hard to stay mad at. I just wanna know that you and the baby are safe. And...I _really_ hate hospitals.”

Lola leaned into him, feeling a twinge of guilt. She’d been pissed off at Miles earlier, but the last thing she wanted to be was a girlfriend who disregarded his feelings. She knew Miles had already experienced more than enough of that in his life from people who were supposed to love him. “I’m sorry,” she said quietly, lacing her fingers over his. “I don’t ever wanna make you feel like that. Your feelings are the most important thing in the world to me. I just...I got fed up with everyone trying to tell me what to do, you know? And I started thinking about how everything is gonna be totally different in just a couple of months, and how I’m never gonna get these normal teenage years back. I know it sounds kind of selfish, but I just freaked.” She looked at Miles with her big puppy-dog eyes, which had begun to get watery. “But now all I wanna know is that our baby is okay. And that you can forgive me for being totally stupid...because fighting with you kind of makes me feel like someone punched me in the stomach, and _that_ can’t be good for the baby.”

A smile slowly spread across Miles’ features. “Yeah, I think I can do that,” he said, and leaned in and planted a kiss on her lips. “Sorry too.” 

“Sorry boo.” Lola matched Miles’ phrase with a smile. The scary parts were far from over, but at least now she had the person she loved the most here by her side to assure her.

…

Lola looked up at Miles, watching his eyes widen as Shay’s mother squeezed gel onto Lola’s bare stomach. “At least I’m finally able to come to one of these things…” Miles trailed off, seemingly unsure if his enthusiasm was appropriate, at least until they were sure everything was alright with the baby. He hadn’t been able to make Lola’s last ultrasound, so it _had_ been a considerable amount of time since he’d had a firsthand look at their baby.

“We should be able to get a clear picture of your little peanut in just a moment,” Shay’s mother began the imaging procedure, eyes laser-focused on the ultrasound screen. As awkward as this was, Lola did find it kind of weirdly comforting that Shay’s mom was the one doing this instead of some random nurse or doctor. 

Miles interlaced his fingers with Lola’s, squeezing her hand for extra reassurance. Right now Lola was having a strange feeling -- like they were _real parents._ Despite the obvious symptoms, Lola usually still felt like a total poser when it came to being pregnant. 

“I love you,” Miles whispered to Lola at a volume only she could hear. She never got tired of hearing those words from him. She especially appreciated them now. Before Lola could even respond, her eyes were immediately pulled to the image on the screen: _their baby_. 

There the baby was, curled up with their tiny feet kicking and their little fists squirming around. “There’s your baby...” Shay’s mom said, pointing at the screen. “Nothing seems abnormal, looks like we’ve got all our fingers and toes.” 

Lola exhaled a large sigh of relief as she observed her baby’s movements on the screen. “They look so warm and snuggly in there,” she said dreamily, allowing herself to fantasize for a moment about finally holding their baby in her arms. “Their head is so perfect and round…”

Shay’s eyes were even wider than Miles’. “Their head is _huge_ ,” she said, seeming slightly freaked out. Frankie had been there for most of these pregnancy milestones, but this was Shay’s first real up close look. The reality of all this seemed to be hitting Shay for the first time too. “I mean, no offense. I just mean...crap Lo, that’s a real _baby_ now.”

Lola could feel Miles’ hands start to tremble as he stared at the image of their baby. “Does everything look okay?” Miles asked Shay’s mom with urgency before Lola could even so much as get a word in. “No damage from the accident or anything? It didn’t mess up Lola’s... _placentals_ or whatever?”

Shay’s mother couldn’t help but crack a smile as she kindly corrected Miles. “Are you referring to the _placenta,_ young man?” 

Miles nodded, attempting to swallow his embarrassment. “I guess I have a few things to learn about all this stuff,” he admitted. “Maybe I’ll take a look at one of the parenting books my mom not-so-subtly left on my bed while I was at school.”

“I have so much to learn. It’s making my _brain_ hurt,” Lola chimed in, reassuring Miles that he was far from the only one feeling overwhelmed right now. “It’s like, how am I supposed to learn polynomials _and_ how to be a perfect mom at the same time?”

“I’m gonna let you in on a little secret,” Shay’s mother started. “There’s no such thing as being a perfect mom.” 

“Just like there’s no such thing as a perfect dad…” Miles spoke in a half-mumble. His mind was clearly on the bad experiences and memories that he had with his own imperfect father. “I wanna be the best dad I can be, though. And I _never_ wanna hurt my kid…”

“Just wanting to be a good parent is a good start,” Shay’s mother said, her tone again a perfect mix between reassuring and serious. “Really, it is. Babies are a _lot_ of work, though...parenthood is more of a responsibility than I can even begin to explain. I couldn’t even get Shay to sleep through the night until she was almost two. Of course, now I wish she’d sleep a little _less_ …”

Shay sighed with embarrassment. “ _Mom._ ”

“My point is,” Shay’s mother said, turning back to Miles and Lola, “now is the time to get serious. Read those parenting books, figure out how you’re going to manage school, shop for baby clothes and supplies, learn how to change a diaper…”

“Oh god, I don’t even know the first thing about _that_ ,” Lola realized, a slight gasp escaping from her lips. “I don’t know how to change a diaper…how am I gonna take care of a baby full-time?” She stared up at the ultrasound and felt tears form in her eyes. She already loved their baby so much, but she also couldn’t help but feel she was already failing at this. She was still _so_ scared, and she could see Miles was too. Was this what it felt like to be a _real_ parent? Lola couldn’t help but wonder if she was in way over her head.

Shay’s mother softened her expression, seeming to sense Lola’s fear. “But you’re going to learn,” she said assuredly. “Something tells me you’re going to be fine. Just don’t be afraid to ask for help. You have a lot of people who care about you -- I can tell.” 

Miles handed Lola a tissue, always able to sense just what she needed. Shay reached over and put a hand on Lola’s shoulder, “Good thing your baby has the best aunties.”

Shay’s mother looked over at the ultrasound screen and smiled. “Just look how beautiful your baby is.”

Miles squeezed Lola’s hand, his eyes glassy and glued to the image of their baby. “I dunno if every parent says this, but...I think we have the most perfect baby in the world, Lo.”

Lola wiped her teary eyes. She still felt completely overwhelmed and scared, but it did help to remember how much love her baby was already surrounded by. This wasn’t going to be easy by any means, but at least she wasn’t on this journey alone. Maybe she’d just needed a reminder of that...and maybe a bit of a reality check. She just wished she felt _ready._

“I think you’re right,” Lola said, still sniffling a little. She placed her hand over her bump and she felt the baby hiccup again. 

_Hope._


	38. Chapter 38

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frankie and Esme figure out what to do after the car accident.

“I am _so_ sorry about your car,” Frankie rambled. Esme had been silently staring forward into space in the passenger seat since Shay’s father had come to transport Lola and Shay. “I’m sure as soon as I tell my parents, one of them will be writing a check to get it fixed… _as long_ as they have no idea that I was high or you were drunk.” Frankie started realizing that this was going to be a difficult situation to slither out of unscathed. Unless they were able to come up with a good lie about how the front end of Esme’s car got smashed up, they were going to need to find a way to fix Esme’s car — and _fast._

Esme continued to focus her eyes forward blankly, coming across as totally disconnected and devoid of emotion. Silent Esme worried Frankie much more than drunk, yelling Esme. “My dad is gonna be _so_ pissed,” she finally said, still not fully acknowledging Frankie beside her. Esme’s brain seemed completely overloaded. All Frankie wanted to do in this moment was calm her girlfriend down — she just didn’t know _how._

Frankie’s hands reached over and touched Esme’s arm, rubbing her muscles slightly to relieve the tension they were holding. “We’re gonna handle this and your dad never needs to know.” 

Frankie admittedly didn’t know much about Esme’s home life. The details Esme _had_ shared were few and far between and brief as hell. Esme was much more of the type to ask a ton of questions about other peoples’ upbringings than she was likely to talk about her own. 

Esme’s body relaxed slightly at Frankie’s touch, but her frustration still lingered. “How are we supposed to hide a giant ugly _dent_?!”

“We’re going to get it fixed without your dad ever knowing,” Frankie reassured her girlfriend, taking a dive into the depths of her brain hoping for some semblance of a plan. Suddenly, a light bulb appeared over Frankie’s head. “Wait! This kid in my science class who was at the party tonight works at this mechanic shop.”

“That dork you smoked with? You think _he_ could fix my car?” Esme scoffed, but seemed sort of intrigued by the solution. “I dunno. It’s getting pretty late. Do you think they’d still be open?” 

Frankie moved closer to Esme, placing her hand on her knee. Any ounce of affection she could show to Esme, she wanted to. Frankie had waited and fantasized about moments like this dozens of times. Now that they had confessed their mutual attraction and feelings, Frankie felt completely magnetized -- like no time or touch could possibly be too much. Esme felt _just right --_ even now. “It’s not _too_ late. Maybe we could get the car towed to the shop tonight.”

“And how exactly would I be getting home without my car?” Esme’s voice turned cold again with her skepticism.

“Sleepover at my place tonight,” Frankie offered. “It’ll be the first time you sleep over as my _girlfriend._ Isn’t that exciting?” Frankie didn’t mean to sound giddy right now, but she couldn’t really help it. Just the word _‘girlfriend’_ sent shivers down Frankie’s spine in the best way. “The shop could fix it first thing in the morning and it’ll be like nothing happened.”

“Do you think your mom would notice my car is gone?” Esme asked, still an edge to her voice. Frankie noticed that Esme disregarded the comment about sleeping over as her girlfriend. She was a little hurt, but tried not to take Esme’s lack of enthusiasm as an insult. Now was _not_ the time for drama.

“Probably not. But we’ll take an Uber first thing in the morning just to be safe,” Frankie continued forming a plan. “We’ll tell my mom we’re going on a hike or something, then we can grab some cold brew and croissants on the way to the mechanic shop.” 

Esme still looked like her head was spinning, but her face started to soften. “Okay...we can do that. That’s actually...that might work...” Slowly, the spiral and spin that Esme’s brain had been sucked into began to cease. She eased into a small smirk. “I don’t totally hate you, you know.”

Frankie leaned over and kissed Esme’s cheek. “One crisis handled…” she started, then her face began to fall. “Now I have to deal with _everything else_ I messed up tonight…”

Esme reached over, touching Frankie’s hand. It felt like every single time they touched, Frankie’s heart raced and she felt like she was floating. Similar to how Frankie had just quelled Esme’s worries, Esme seemed to be stepping up to the plate to do the same for Frankie. “Let’s start by calling Miles. He needs to know what’s going on and I _doubt_ Shay will let Lola get a phone call or word in edgewise before she gets checked out by the doc. We’ll figure out the rest from there.”

Frankie nodded in agreement. “Call Miles first,” she echoed, reluctantly reaching for her phone. “I _really_ don’t want to tell him this…he’s gonna be so pissed that I put his girlfriend _and_ his baby in danger. Especially if he knows I was _high..._ ”

“I’ll do it,” Esme volunteered with a shrug. Now that she was observing her mannerisms up close, Frankie noticed that Esme still came off as a bit groggy and tipsy. “Plus it’s not like Miles has never done anything stupid when he was high. That used to be like, his _thing_.”

“I still feel bad…” Frankie scrolled through her contacts and found her brother’s phone number, hesitantly holding her fingertip inches away from the screen. “I have to tell him, though.”

“Your brother shooting the messenger is pretty much _guaranteed_ in this situation. I’m already used to Miles hating me. I can handle it,” Esme leaned over to place her head on Frankie’s shoulder. “Plus...I have the fact that I’m dating his sister up my sleeve now,” a smile crept onto Esme’s face, her stormy mood finally clearing out. “I can’t _wait_ to throw that in his face.” 

“You’re not just dating me to make my brother jealous, are you?” Frankie got serious for a moment. “I know you and Miles have _history_ ,” Frankie shuddered at the thought of Esme and Miles together. She _really_ didn’t like this idea of trading partners with her brother. “But I wanna make sure you want me for me...”

“I would _never_ ,” Esme said, seeming almost insulted. “I like you way more than I ever liked your brother. Now either let me call him or do it yourself. I wanna call a tow truck and an Uber before it gets too dark. This ravine skeeves me out past sunset.” 

Frankie nodded, feeling a strange sense of security for what felt like the first time in forever. Despite Esme being a bit of a roller coaster sometimes, she also somehow had this way of being the most calming force in Frankie’s life. Frankie pressed the ‘call’ button and held her breath as she listened to the dial tone. 

…

“Wow, nice house...” The Uber driver who drove Frankie and Esme home stated, eyeing the two girls through his rearview mirror as he pulled up to the Hollingsworth mansion. “You gonna give me a big tip, aren't ya? A little rich girl like you should know how to tip generously.” 

Frankie tossed the two robo-babies that she had been holding on her lap into the backseat next to Esme. She shifted in her seat uncomfortably, attempting to reach into her pockets to see if she had any spare change or bills. 

“Back off, dude,” Esme cut in, placing her hand on Frankie’s shoulder. “You don’t have to give him anything extra. I’ll tip him on the app.” She cut her eyes over to the Uber driver, giving him an arctic stare. “And I’ll definitely keep your little exploitation attempt in my mind the _whole_ time.” 

The driver rolled his eyes and unlocked the door. “Whatever, bitch.” Frankie assumed that was his _subtle_ way of encouraging the girls to get out of the car. 

“You’re the bitch, _bitch!_ ” Esme shot back, getting out and slamming the car door. Frankie got out much more calmly and moved out of the way just in time for the driver to speed off. She looked over expecting that she would need to help Esme calm down, but she soon realized that Esme was _laughing_. “What a _jerk,_ ” Esme said, still laughing as the two girls approached the front door. “Obviously tipping him _zero_ on the app.” 

“Are you okay?” Frankie asked. “We need to be on the same page dealing with my mom.” 

Esme wiped the corners of her eyes, which had produced tears from laughing. Was it _really_ that funny? Once Esme had collected herself completely, she responded. “We drove home. Lola decided to sleep at Shay’s instead since she can’t sleep over here because of Miles. We want flatbread pizza. I think we’ve got it all covered, right?” 

“Is she really gonna believe that we split up from Lola and Shay?” Frankie asked her girlfriend. 

Esme raised an eyebrow. “Is it really that hard to believe that we’d want a break from the _pregnant_ and the _prude_? I’m sure your mom is sick of feeling like she’s living in an episode of Teen Mom too.” 

Esme reached for the front door knob, but Frankie slapped her hand away. “I just wanna make sure we have a plan! I _suck_ at lying!” Frankie blurted out. She hadn’t realized just how anxious she was until now. Her mother had never really been Esme’s biggest fan, considering she originally knew Esme as Miles’ _enabler._ The fact that Frankie was now dating her was sure to ruffle some feathers.

Suddenly, the front door knob turned from the other side and opened. Frankie was met face-to-face with her mother. “Yes, you do _suck_ at lying,” she agreed with her daughter. “Get inside, girls. _Now._ I’ve been worried sick.” 

“Why were you worried…?” Frankie asked hesitantly, wanting to probe what exactly her mom _thought_ had happened. “We were supposed to go see a movie then hang out at the Cantina til’ closing time,” she repeated the fake plan that she had told her mother earlier that evening. 

Mrs. Hollingsworth led the two girls to the kitchen. “Would you like some water, Esme?” she offered. The vibe just seemed… _weird._ “We have sparkling and flat.” 

“Why are you offering her water?” Frankie asked her mother point blank. “Why aren’t you yelling at us?” 

“Miles left a note on the kitchen counter saying he was going to the hospital because Lola had been in an accident,” Mrs. Hollingsworth said. Her voice was calm and measured, which usually meant she was furious with Frankie but didn’t want to blow a gasket in front of guests. “I was worried sick when I couldn’t get a hold of you. I figured you must have gone to the hospital with Lola since you didn’t come home right away. Did you?” 

Frankie thought about lying and saying that she and Esme had stopped by the hospital, but it honestly felt too late to try to weave a false narrative. There was a high likelihood that her mother knew the answer to any questions she was asking, so she decided not to bother. “We were going to…”

Frankie’s mother continued, cutting her daughter off. “Your brother called after checking on Lola and he said you guys were nowhere to be found. You weren’t answering your phone, so I called Esme’s father.”

“You did _what_?” Esme burst out. “What did you say? What did _he_ say?” 

Mrs. Hollingsworth seemed startled. “I just told him that you-”

“Hang on,” Esme interrupted, something Frankie wouldn’t _dare_ try with her mother. Esme reached into her pocket to check her phone, something she hadn’t done in literal hours. She unlocked her screen and read something that made her face fall. “Just as I thought,” she scoffed. “He said not to even bother coming home. Among other obscenities.”

Frankie’s mother shook her head. “He was nothing but nice on the phone. I can’t believe that.” 

“Believe it. He tends to do that. My dad pretty much hates my guts,” Esme said. “He’s been threatening to kick me out for months. He was just waiting for the first opportunity to get rid of me once and for all.”

“I’m sure that’s not true, Esme,” Mrs. Hollingsworth interjected, trying to be helpful, but sucking at it. Honestly, Frankie didn’t think that her mother was exactly the best judge of character, especially when it came to terrible dads. “I met him once at a parent-teacher night and he seemed like a very reasonable man.” 

“You don’t understand!” Esme snapped, though her voice sounded more scared than angry. “He’s a different person when he’s mad. He’s not… _himself_.”

Frankie wondered if the bond she had with Esme would somehow be stronger now that Frankie knew they could relate with one another on having crappy, angry dads. She wrapped her arms around Esme for a few moments, hoping to reassure her girlfriend and melt at least _some_ of the stress away. 

Mrs. Hollingsworth seemed to soften slightly. “I think it’d be okay if you stayed in Frankie’s room for tonight until we get this sorted out. Why don’t you two get to bed? It’s getting late.” It was clear there was a part of Frankie’s mother that felt guilty for accidentally ratting Esme out and causing this. It was also clear that she had no idea how to handle such a sensitive situation, so she was pushing it off until she had more time to think and prepare. Very typical.

“Are you mad?” Frankie dared to ask her mother directly, breaking the embrace with Esme and turning herself to face her mother. 

“Yes — and we’ll discuss this more tomorrow,” Frankie’s mother said. “But I would never kick you out.” Mrs. Hollingsworth wrapped her arms around her daughter. Intimate acts like this were few and far between for the members of the Hollingsworth family, so the hug felt sort of _weird._ “I’m just glad you’re safe.”

“I’m glad we’re safe too,” Frankie pulled Esme into the hug. Feeling like this was as good a time as ever, Frankie looked to her girlfriend, then her mother. “By the way, Esme and I have some news.”

Frankie’s mother cocked her head to the side. “Oh?”

“Esme and I…” For a moment Frankie almost hesitated. Her mother didn’t let boys in her room because of the possibility of sex, thus possibility of _pregnancy._..something Frankie found hilariously ironic given that her older brother was about to become a teenage father. Would that rule still apply now that Frankie was dating a girl? She supposed there was only one way to find out. “We’re... _girlfriends_.” 

It had been a while since Frankie had seen her mother so completely and utterly speechless. Mrs. Hollingsworth stuttered a bit before finally responding, “I _see_.” 

Mrs. Hollingsworth broke apart the hug and excused herself to bed, saying it was getting late. She didn’t seem _upset_ , and Frankie knew her mother likely wasn’t homophobic considering she was fine with Miles’ bisexuality. Still, Frankie couldn’t quite gauge her mother’s true feelings here. Maybe it was less about Frankie dating a girl and more about _who_ she was dating...regardless, Frankie thought, they had bigger issues right now.

“I guess that went better than it could have…” Frankie said to Esme once they were alone. She reached into the fridge and pulled out a leftover pizza box. “Are you still hungry? We don’t have flatbread, but this thin crust is pretty close...”

Esme just stood there blankly for a second. Frankie waved a hand in front of her face, worried. “What’s the matter?”

Esme let out a tired laugh under her breath, “I just realized we left the robo-babies in the Uber.”


	39. Chapter 39

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola encounters an unexpected guest when she arrives home after the party.

“Thanks for the ride home,” Lola said to Shay and her father as they pulled up to Lola’s house, parking next to the curb. “And thank your mom again for everything, Shay _\-- seriously_.”

Shay reached over and patted Lola’s shoulder. “I’m just glad that you and the baby are okay. I _knew_ hanging out with Esme was gonna cause some sort of trouble…” 

“It wasn’t Esme’s fault,” Lola let out a tired sigh. “I mean, technically Frankie was driving, right? I still don’t understand why she hit that pole…” 

“I’m sure it was an accident. Franks would never do anything that crazy on purpose. That’s more Esme’s wheelhouse.” Shay was trying to be reassuring, but she couldn’t help but get her digs in _whenever_ she could. “Speaking of, have you heard from Frankie any more tonight?” 

“No, my phone’s been dead. My dad is gonna be _so_ pissed…” Lola said anxiously, feeling those butterflies in her stomach again. Either that, or the baby was just kicking super softly. She placed her hand over her stomach, trying to just be grateful that there was no harm to the baby. She hadn’t told Miles or anyone this, but lately she’d really been feeling like it was a girl. She couldn’t explain why, it was just a feeling.

Mr. Powers cut in. “The meter’s running, girls…can you two have this conversation in the morning? It’s getting late.” 

Lola nodded and reluctantly obliged — she opened the door and stepped out of the car, clutching her belly and groaning a little. “Thanks again!” she called out as she shut the door behind her and looked toward her house. A part of Lola secretly hoped Shay and her father would stay, but Mr. Powers took off as Lola set foot on her driveway. Something caught Lola’s eye before she got to the front door -- an extra car in the driveway. _Weird._ Her father rarely had people over, especially at this hour. Whatever was happening, it couldn’t be good.

Lola noticed a slight shake in her hands as her fingers reached to grip the knob and open the door. This had been the most stressful and eventful night since Lola and Miles told their families about the baby. Lola knew that Mr. Powers had called her father and at least filled him in a little, but she honestly had no idea what she was about to walk into. She wished she could have just gone home from the hospital with Miles instead, but crashing at the Hollingsworth house definitely would have landed her in even _more_ hot water.

Lola took a deep breath and opened the front door. “ _Dad…_?” she called out cautiously. She was utterly exhausted and really just wanted to go straight to bed, but she knew that wasn’t an option.

Lola’s father didn’t waste any time. He came running out from the kitchen, “Lola, Lola! Ay dios mio, I’ve been worried _sick,_ Mija!” His tone was a mixture of anger, panic, and relief that Lola was okay. “Are you alright?! Why weren’t you answering your phone? I was two seconds from jumping into the car and tracking you down at the hospital…!”

“I’m fine, Dad,” Lola said, her voice slightly shaking. “I’m really sorry. I know you must be like, _super_ mad at me. It was just a minor fender bender, and then my phone died...but I’m fine, the baby’s fine. Promise.” She wanted to ask whose car was in the driveway, but her father cut in before she could get another word in.

“You can’t just _do_ things like this, Lola!” Mr. Pacini said, seeming exasperated. He didn’t usually get like this, but Lola knew she had really pushed her father to his limits these past few months. “Honestly Mija, I don’t know _what_ to do with you anymore.” 

In that particular moment, all of the tension and emotion that Lola had been holding back both consciously and unconsciously crashed over her and consumed her like a tidal wave. “You were right,” she started tearfully. “I don’t know what I’m doing. I’m not _ready…_ ” Lola moved forward and wrapped her father in an embrace. Her father immediately returned the hug, rubbing the middle of Lola’s back in an attempt to comfort her. 

After allowing Lola to bury her face in his shoulder and cry for a moment, Lola’s father pulled away and held her shoulders, looking her in the eye as he spoke. He was still clearly upset and angry with her, but he also seemed to just want to make sure she was okay. “Talk to me. What’s going on?”

“I just realized that there are a million things about being a parent that I’m _totally_ not prepared for,” Lola admitted. “I just...I feel way in over my head. I don’t want to give them up. I just need to know that I can do this. I’m _scared._ ” 

Her father sighed. “I know, Mija. But don’t forget you’re not doing this alone,” he said, sounding just as tired as Lola. “Being a parent is the hardest job in the world.”

“I’ll second that,” a familiar voice entered from the living room. A small gasp escaped Lola’s lips as she turned around.

Lola’s _mother_ was the mystery guest. Lola should’ve recognized the car in the driveway… 

“Why are you here?” Lola’s tone turned a bit sour. She quickly noticed it and half-attempted to sound less rude. “I mean, I wasn’t really expecting you to be…here.” 

Lola’s mother cocked her head to the side. “No _hello?"_ she asked. Her eyes focused on Lola’s baby bump, clearly a bit shocked at the sight. Lola hadn’t been showing too much yet when they last saw each other, but now she was just so obviously pregnant. 

“I’ve had a long night,” Lola threw out a quick excuse, although she knew it wasn’t going to cut it. “I don’t really wanna talk about it.”

“Your mother and I were getting together tonight anyway,” Lola’s father interjected. “We were terrified when Shay’s father called and told us that you had been in an accident. Your mom stayed to make sure that you were okay.” 

“Why don’t we sit down on the sofa to chat for a minute? You shouldn’t be on your feet,” Lola’s mother said. It was probably meaning to sound nice, but it somehow still felt like a criticism to Lola. She just wasn’t used to her mother being... _motherly_. 

“Fine…” Lola muttered, still feeling weirded out by the sight of her parents hanging out together late at night like this. She waddled her way over to the couch in the living room and let out a slight groan as she sank into the sofa. “So, what’s going on?” she asked her parents. “Why were you guys getting together?”

“We’ve been discussing _you_ ,” her father spoke up. Lola couldn’t help but feel a little betrayed. “We’d rather talk _with_ you, you just…” 

Lola’s mom cut in, “You’re not giving me a _chance_. You’ve let your father in, but you’ll barely even look at me, let alone tell me what’s going on.” 

There were so many things Lola wanted to say right then. _Maybe you shouldn’t have left when I needed you the most_ , she thought but didn’t say. _Maybe that’s why I don’t trust you._ Lola just sat on the couch, sort of zoned out thinking about the night’s events and how strange it was that her mother was _here_. As far as Lola knew, before tonight, her mother hadn’t been in this house since shortly after she left. But now she had to wonder…how many times had her father slipped her mother in and out of the house like a sneaky teenager, inviting someone over when Lola wasn’t home? “So, how often have you guys been meeting behind my back?” Lola snapped, the words just kind of slipping out.

“It wasn’t meant to be _behind your back_ ,” Lola’s father shot back. “Remember when we got together a few months back? How we talked about making it a weekly thing?”

Lola honestly didn’t remember that conversation. She had spent half of that get-together with her nose buried in her phone, texting Miles and avoiding the uncomfortable interactions with her parents. 

“Your mother and I both committed to it being a weekly thing that day,” Lola’s father said. “The next week you had already made plans with Miles. I asked you to cancel but you didn’t want to, so we met up without you.”

“I’ve been trying to get you to talk, but you never answer my calls,” Lola’s mother added, sounding a little hurt.

Words spilled out of Lola’s mouth before she could regulate what she was saying, “If only you could’ve been as committed to _Dad_ as you are to your little _weekly meet-ups_.” 

Lola knew that was the wrong thing to say as soon as the words left her mouth. She quickly cupped a hand over her mouth. 

Her father spoke up before Lola could stumble through an apology. “That was out of line,” he chastised his daughter. “You _cannot_ speak to me or your mother that way, Mija. And by the way...you’re grounded. For a week. Two weeks if you keep it up.”

Lola supposed she had that coming. “I’m sorry...” she attempted to apologize to her parents, but she was so exhausted that it came out sounding half-genuine at best. This whole night had been a whirlwind. She just needed to _sleep._ And...think. “I’m just...I’m _really_ tired. I really think I should just go to bed.”

“Not just yet,” her mother interjected before Lola could even attempt to get off the couch. “Your father and I need to talk to you about something. I have some news.” 

Lola felt even more uneasy now. Whatever this news was, Lola doubted it was good. She recognized she was being kind of childish and rude, but seeing her parents together like this just caught her so off guard. Sure, she and her mother had their phone calls and occasional little visits, but her dad was the only one who’d really been a _parent_ to her since her mom traded the family life for a high-end job and a cushy apartment two hours up the coast. 

Lola knew her parents had her pretty young — not _sixteen_ young, but in their early twenties. Lola also knew she wasn’t exactly a planned baby, given that her dad had once described her as a _‘happy surprise_ ,’ which was a nice way to say _‘accident.’_

From what Lola had gathered, her parents’ marriage had mostly fallen apart because her mom wasn’t ready to be a full-time mother and wife. According to Lola’s father, her mother just wasn’t _happy_ , which definitely caused Lola to feel like she wasn’t _enough_ to keep her mother around. Maybe Lola could understand her mother’s feelings on some level now given how un-ready _she_ was currently feeling...but it was still difficult to forgive her just leaving the way she did. It was even more difficult to just welcome her mother back with open arms now that she’d suddenly decided to be involved in Lola’s life again. 

“Lola?” her mother popped the thought bubble above Lola’s head and brought her back to reality. “Are you listening?” 

Lola honestly hadn’t been listening. She had a tendency to get lost in her thoughts sometimes. “Huh?”

“I’m moving back to Toronto,” Lola’s mother said. “It’s not practical for me to take these long drives every weekend. I need to be closer, given your _circumstances._ And I want to be around when the baby arrives.”

“You’re _what?_ ” Lola sat up straight, convinced she couldn’t possibly be hearing this right. She couldn’t quite contain her shock. “Like, you’re moving back in?”

“No,” Lola’s father quickly cut in, a little _too_ quickly. “Your mother’s found an apartment nearby, just a few blocks from us.” He was doing that stressed out forehead rubbing thing again. “I know this might seem sudden, but this is a _good thing_ , Mija. You’re going to need all the help you can get with the baby.”

“I’ve already got Miles for help,” Lola said, though she knew it was a cop out. She knew especially after tonight's events that she and Miles weren’t anywhere near ready to raise a baby all by themselves, that they definitely needed help. But this was all just too much to process right now. Lola wasn’t kidding when she told Shay’s mom all of this was making her brain hurt. 

“We know. _I_ know,” Lola’s mother sighed. “But a girl needs her mother, especially at a time like this.”

Lola really couldn’t help herself when she heard those words. “Don’t you think it’s a little _late?"_ she said, gesturing down to her belly. She couldn’t stand that her mother acted like certain things didn’t happen, especially when those memories and scars for Lola ran _deep_ and were still open and raw. Lola spent the past few years feeling like she wasn’t enough to keep her mother around. Her mom coming back to town now just seemed to validate that idea. Her mother didn’t want to live nearby when it was just Lola and her father, but once a new shiny baby was on the way…Lola attempted to shake those insecurities for the time being. She just wanted to go upstairs and collapse in her warm, soft bed with Fernando and all of her favorite stuffed animals. It had been a _long_ night. 

Lola’s father, seeming to notice that Lola was in no condition to continue this conversation, reached down and patted his daughter on the shoulder. “We don’t have to talk about all of the details tonight. Your mother is moving into her new place at the beginning of next month. There’ll be time to adjust to the idea.”

“I don’t want to adjust to…” Lola gave up midway through her sentence. There was no use. It was already decided. “I’m gonna go to bed now,” she said, deciding that she wasn’t even going to try to figure out this dilemma tonight. Like her father said, there would be _time_. Lola didn’t think any amount of time was going to make her comfortable with the mother who abandoned her just waltzing back into her life when it was convenient. 

“It was nice to see you, Chiquilla,” Lola’s mother used the nickname that she had always called Lola when she was small. The nickname meant _little girl_ , which was pretty accurate to how Lola was feeling at the moment. Like a small, scared little girl who had no idea what the hell she was doing. 

Lola sort of softly nodded, unable to lie and say that it was nice to see her mother. Of course there was part of Lola who always missed her mother and wanted her family to be back together again, but something just felt _off_ about this whole situation. She knew every bit of extra help would be beneficial...but at what cost?


	40. Chapter 40

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frankie, Esme and Lola prepare to go to the mechanic's shop to get Esme's car fixed.

Frankie sat on the edge of her bed, silently watching Esme as she slept peacefully. For some reason, Frankie was _really_ struggling to go to sleep. There was _so much_ hanging over her head, which was definitely part of what was keeping her awake, but there was also something else nagging at her -- she just wasn’t sure exactly what it was. 

Her eyes focused on the alarm clock that sat on her bedside table. 5:54AM. She had officially pulled an unintentional all-nighter. Of course as soon as her tired eyes fell on the sunrise sneaking through her blinds, Frankie had the urge to lay down with Esme and shut her eyes for a while -- _too late._ Or too _early_ , depending on how you looked at it. 

Frankie scooted closer to Esme, thinking about waking her girlfriend up with a kiss on the forehead. That wouldn’t be too much, would it? It was so weird to have someone that she wanted to kiss just…sleeping over in her bed. She thought back to when her mother banned boys from her room. Back then, she thought that was the end of the world _and_ her love life. Now, Frankie thought as she decidedly placed a kiss on Esme’s temple, she wasn’t so worried about the boy ban in her bedroom. Frankie wondered if her mother would try to draw the same lines with a same-sex partner. Miles and Tristan had never gotten along enough for Miles to invite him to sleep over, so she wasn’t sure what to expect from her mother.

Esme sleepily reached up and mumbled something that Frankie couldn’t quite understand. She repeated herself more clearly -- “ _Another, please_?” she asked, and Frankie’s heart skipped a beat. 

Frankie obliged of course, placing another kiss on Esme’s other temple. “It’s about to be 6 a.m.,” Frankie spoke into her girlfriend’s messy bed-head before pulling away. “Should I start scheduling an Uber…?”

“My car!” Esme said with a slight gasp, like she was just now remembering. Her voice sounded irritated immediately now as she muttered, “Yeah, we’ve gotta handle this…” Esme spoke with her eyes still closed, not quite ready to give up on resting even if she was awake now. Given the night they’d had, Esme was probably hungover too.

“Do you need to shower?” Frankie asked. “I definitely need to. I feel like I still smell like skunky weed and cheap beer…” 

Esme slowly sat up. “Wanna shower together?”

Frankie thought about it for a minute. She was embarrassed to admit it, but the question threw her off. She was just so happy to have Esme in her bed, planting soft kisses on her forehead. The thought of going further wasn’t something Frankie was opposed to, but at the same time, she wasn’t sure she was ready for that. The last time she’d tried to hook up with someone, she set her room on fire. Esme was obviously more experienced too, which didn’t necessarily bother Frankie, but it did make her worry a bit about how she’d measure up. 

Just being with a girl was new to Frankie too. She’d never imagined her first time would be with Esme Song, of all people. She didn’t want their first time to be like _this_ either, reeking of booze and weed and her mother asleep across the hallway. Frankie just didn’t really feel _ready_. “Um...you can shower first,” Frankie finally answered, feeling lame as she said it.

Esme just looked at Frankie for a minute, seeming a bit thrown off. “Fine. Just don’t be mad if I use up all the hot water.” 

Esme exited the room and Frankie let out a tiny scream into her pillow. 

Before Frankie could further reflect on her awkwardness, her cell rang. _Lola._ What was she doing up so early? Oh god, was she okay? Frankie had heard through Miles’ texts that Lola and the baby were fine, but she was still at a loss for how she was going to handle the situation. Frankie still felt terrible for being so stupid and putting everyone at risk. 

Frankie answered the phone with a panicky voice, “Lo? _What’s wrong?_ ”

“Um, nothing?” Lola seemed confused. “I mean, not really. I just...I _really_ need to get out of the house. I’m supposed to be grounded, but my dad just left for work, so I was wondering if you could pick me up. I just really need a distraction.” 

Frankie could relate to needing a distraction. “Sure. We’ll swing by in an Uber in 20 minutes,” she told Lola, letting out a yawn.

Lola’s voice softened. “Plus, you kinda have my robo-baby…”

Thank _god_ Esme had managed to trace their Uber driver down last night and get the babies back. Not that it had been a pleasant experience for any of them. Frankie really didn’t want to bring the fake babies along in _another_ Uber ride though, so maybe she’d just leave them here for now and promise Hunter 20 bucks and a new comic to take care of them if they made a fuss. Frankie thought about how in just a few months, this house would be filled with the strange sounds of a _real_ baby. She still didn’t exactly know how Lola and Miles were planning on handling things...would Lola and the baby sleep here some nights? Frankie highly doubted her mother would just let them shack up like that. It made Frankie exhausted just to think about all this. Having barely survived this fake baby project herself, she really couldn’t say she envied her best friend and brother's near future. 

Frankie hung up and threw on some body spray and a comfy hoodie. She looked at herself in the mirror and sighed. Something in her just wasn’t quite ready to face today. She sighed. Sometimes she _hated_ being a confused, angsty teenager. One of her favorite old movies was _13 Going on 30._ It was something her mother had shown her ages ago, probably right around when Frankie turned 13. There had been so many times in her life after watching that movie where she wished she could just skip the rest of her teenage years and just be a functional, normal _adult._ No high school baggage, no tightly woven family ties…she could be _herself._ One day. That day, unfortunately, was not today. 

…

Lola awoke at the crack of dawn to the sound of her dad leaving for an early shift at the Cantina. She was honestly still feeling rattled from the previous night’s events. Despite being exhausted, she’d barely gotten any sleep — partly because she was reaching the point of pregnancy where it was nearly impossible to get comfortable, and partly because there was just _so much_ going through her brain. Her mom coming back, the crash, the baby...Lola just couldn’t deal with everything. 

Lola found herself missing Miles in the middle of the night lately, even if they had just seen each other hours earlier. She couldn’t help but think she’d sleep a lot better if Miles were around. Lola didn’t think she’d ever slept as peacefully as she did in Miles’ bed that fateful night, tucked under his arm and all snuggled up in his t-shirt. She had never felt safer.

Lola squinted at her alarm clock. It wasn’t even 6 a.m., but there wasn’t much use in trying to go back to sleep now. The baby was already awake and kicking away like a soccer star. 

“Morning, boo...” she whispered sleepily down to her belly. That was something Lola found herself doing more lately when she was alone, just talking to the baby. At first she’d felt kind of silly, but lately she found herself doing it as a comfort thing. Lola _definitely_ needed some comfort this morning.

She texted Miles to see if he was awake by chance. Maybe they could just talk on FaceTime and fall back asleep for a while…Lola played Candy Crush for about 10 minutes as she awaited a response. _Nothing._ She sighed, sitting up in her bed and beginning to try to stretch her arms and legs. Everything was _so sore_. Maybe a warm shower would help...

Lola took a nice, relaxing warm bath instead. Her feet hurt far too much to stand in the shower for as long as she wanted to soak in the steam. Plus, she couldn’t take hot showers anymore because of her pregnancy. A warm bath sounded slightly more relaxing than a warm shower anyway. 

Lola used the pink, purple, and blue bath bomb that her father had bought her for Christmas a year or two ago. She watched as the different colors of glitter swirled in the water and her mind naturally wandered to Miles. Before him, these were just her favorite colors -- now they made her think of Miles. Almost everything made her think of Miles. Lola obviously supported her boyfriend’s bisexuality no matter what, but the fact that Miles’ sexuality _also_ happened to have a cute pride flag was an extra perk. 

Lola immediately reached for her phone after she dried off. Still _nothing_ from Miles _._ Lola knew she should probably try to get some more sleep, but she was too awake and antsy now. She also knew she was grounded, but she _really_ couldn’t stand the idea of being cooped up in the house alone all day...she just needed a distraction, especially while the baby was being so jumpy. “Ay dios mio, do you _ever_ rest?” she spoke down to her bump. Clearly, she had _that_ to look forward to. 

Still restless, Lola unlocked her phone and dialed her other favorite Hollingsworth, hoping she’d be awake. To Lola’s relief, Frankie picked up.

“Lo? What’s wrong?” Frankie answered, sounding totally rattled and out of it herself.

Frankie’s tone seemed kind of _weird_ throughout the conversation, which made Lola even more curious to sneak out and get the full scoop. If Lola was honest, she still had a _lot_ of questions about what exactly happened last night. _Plus,_ she needed her robo-baby back. It was Saad’s turn to take care of the assignment. They had chosen to operate on a _separate custody_ situation, which Lola was all too familiar with. 

Frankie gave Lola a timeline of about 20 minutes, which was more than enough time to get ready. Lola had less and less patience for all of the tedious tasks that getting ready and looking _cute_ required. She was just gonna have to rely on her natural cuteness. She caught her own eye in the mirror and observed herself for a moment. Pregnancy honestly looked good on Lola. Her skin was better than ever and her hair had gotten a chance to grow out because she wasn’t constantly dyeing it and changing it on a whim. She slipped an oversized denim jacket that she had stolen from Miles’ closet over the vintage CareBear t-shirt she had already put on, then threw on a pair of maternity leggings and covered her mismatched socks with her pink slippers. She smiled at herself in the mirror and placed her hand over her baby bump, “I’d say we look pretty good, eh?” Lola was really trying her damndest to find the silver lining in things. 


	41. Chapter 41

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frankie, Esme & Lola collide with some Degrassi alumni while trying to get Esme’s car fixed.

Frankie and Esme’s Uber pulled up to the familiar curb in front of Lola’s house. “This is the place,” Frankie confirmed. “I’ll go knock on the door.” 

Frankie walked up to the door and knocked. Almost immediately, the front door swung open. Lola stood in the front entrance wearing a baggy t-shirt and a smile on her face, munching on a cereal bar.

“Morning, Franks,” Lola greeted Frankie. “How was the rest of your night last night? My phone was dead til’ I got home and then by the time I got to plug it in, well...it was a _long_ night.” She yawned and stretched her arms, adding, “Ay dios mio, my feet are _still_ sore.”

Frankie was glad that Lola didn’t seem to be upset or holding a grudge because of the crash. Maybe after the mechanic shop they could just pretend it never happened…that was usually Frankie’s course of action whenever things got tough. She’d just block it out and pretend it wasn’t happening -- or at least _try_ to. Frankie wasn’t sure if she’d inherited the tendency from her mother or simply developed it as a coping strategy growing up in the Hollingsworth house. Some things were more difficult to ignore, though. Her guilt over causing the crash, for example… 

The mechanic shop was just past Lola’s Cantina. When the Uber drove past the Cantina, Frankie noticed Lola slumping down in her seat and sort of hiding, as if her father had some sort of X-Ray vision or sixth sense that would allow him detect his daughter’s delinquency and expose Lola for not staying where her father had told her to. 

The Uber driver pulled up to the front of the shop. “Here you are,” she spoke for the first time the entire drive. 

“Thank you.” Lola was the only one to remember to thank the driver as the girls unloaded out of the car and headed toward the shop. Frankie’s mind was way too consumed with other things, like how exactly this situation at the mechanic was going to go. Frankie had _some_ money in her bank account, but she had heard car issues could be pricey. Esme seemed stressed about covering it, so Frankie had to assume it wouldn’t be cheap. 

The three girls walked into the front area of the shop and were met by a beautiful woman in her late twenties with long wavy black hair and a nose piercing. She was bouncing a baby boy on her left hip and lightly singing a song. “Jay, you’ve got customers!” she called out toward the other part of the shop where the cars were. 

“I’ll be right there!” a man, assumedly _Jay_ , responded with zero sense of urgency. 

Frankie, Esme and Lola stood there for a few moments, shifting their glances from their phone screens to one another to the woman behind the counter holding a baby. Frankie couldn’t help but think this woman was _way_ too pretty to just be a receptionist at some dingy mechanic’s shop. Lola couldn’t seem to take her eyes off the baby, seeming both enamored with and wary of the little guy at the same time. Lola pulled her denim jacket up self-consciously, as if that was going to make her look any less pregnant.

A man with a backwards baseball cap emerged, holding a kid who couldn’t be more than three years old. His hands were covered in oil or grease or something and it had gotten all over the little girl’s pretty pink jumper. The woman behind the counter tsked, “This is why I should never dress them in cute clothes when we come to visit you at work.”

Jay set the young girl down and observed her outfit, noticing the stains. “It was an accident, Manny. Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?” His tone came across as sort of teasing, but he somehow still seemed genuinely apologetic. He grabbed a dirty rag and wiped his hands off before directing his attention toward Frankie, Esme, and Lola. “What can I do for you, girls?” 

Frankie stuttered. Esme quickly stepped up and spoke up, “We got my car towed here last night. I need it fixed ASAP. Like, ‘my dad is gonna kill me if this isn’t fixed’ ASAP.” Esme’s tone was sharp and cutting with Jay, but Frankie noticed Esme’s eyes were soft as she eyed the baby on the woman’s hip, almost like Esme was secretly dying to hold him. Frankie was perplexed, and kind of amused — as usual, her girlfriend was an enigma.

“I’ve been there before,” the woman cut in. “C’mon Jay, remember the time we barely got my dad’s car back and fixed in time?” 

“Oh, _I remember_ ,” Jay swung a set of keys around his index finger before tossing it to the woman, _Manny,_ who Frankie assumed was Jay’s wife. “Your front bumper is completely crunched. I don’t know if I have the right parts.”

“Did you _look_?” Manny challenged him. “Or are you just trying to _slack off?”_

Jay scoffed. “C’mon, _Manny…”_

“Don’t be a slacker,” Manny bounced the baby she was holding on her hip. “Slackers are _not_ cute.” Her eyes fell on Lola and she let out a small, excited squeal, “Ohmygosh, are you…?” 

Frankie glanced over to see Lola reluctantly nod. Lola finally stopped trying to cover up the obvious with her jacket and gave a hesitant smile. “I am. Almost seven months,” Lola spoke to Manny, smoothing her hand over her baby bump with more confidence than usual. Frankie was glad that Lola seemed to finally be getting more comfortable with herself at least.

Frankie snapped back to reality when she processed what Lola had just said. _Almost seven months?_ It seemed like just yesterday Lola was sitting in the Hollingsworth kitchen with a plate of peanut butter pancakes, telling Frankie the biggest bombshell of their lives. _So_ much had changed in the past few months, Frankie thought to herself as she glanced back and forth between Lola and Esme — _for better or for worse._

“Ugh, baby talk…” Jay rolled his eyes, but sort of smirked cutely towards Manny. He glanced back to Frankie and Esme. “I’ll look for the parts and see what I can do. _No promises.”_

...

Esme dragged Frankie’s hand and the two of them followed Jay into the garage, leaving just Lola at the front with Manny. Lola was usually pretty good at making conversation with strangers — she had practically grown up waiting tables at the Cantina, after all. She was basically the queen of random small talk. 

The judgy stares and snide remarks Lola had endured the past few months made her want to just crawl into her shell like a turtle whenever someone made eye contact with her now. It wasn’t that Lola was ashamed of being pregnant, not anymore...she was just exhausted by _everyone_ having something to say about it. 

Manny didn’t _seem_ judgy like most people though, or at least Lola didn’t get the vibe that she was. Lola usually considered herself pretty good at reading other people’s vibes, something she credited to her Libra rising. 

Lola watched out of the corner of her eye as Manny played with the baby and tried to picture doing that with her _own_ baby in just a couple of months. It was still hard for Lola to imagine her baby as a _real_ person, a little Lola or Miles running around, or even better — a _mix_ of both of them.

Manny looked up from playing with the baby and smiled at Lola. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to embarrass you earlier,” Manny said to her. “I blame my baby fever. God knows Jay and I have our hands full enough already, though,” she added with a laugh as the little boy reached for her hair. She extended her arm out to Lola and formally introduced herself with a smile, “Manny Santos.”

“Lola Pacini.” Lola smiled back politely and shook Manny’s hand, which she couldn’t help notice was incredibly well-moisturized. “And no, it’s okay. I’m just kinda used to people scolding me or, like, judging. Usually a pregnant teenager attracts a lecture faster than sugar attracts honeybees,” Lola stumbled over her words, sure she sounded like a dummy. 

“Yeah, I know a little bit about that...” Manny said, shifting her eyes towards the floor. Lola raised her brow, slightly curious — unless Lola had seriously misread her age, Manny clearly hadn’t had these two kids as a teenager. Lola didn’t push further, though. Manny cleared her throat and her smile returned, “So, uh, do you know what you’re having?”

Lola shook her head. “No. I... _feel_ like it’s a girl, though?” It dawned on Lola that this was the first time she had said that out loud to anybody. She wandered her hand over her stomach, watching as the little boy shrieked. “Maybe I’ve just spent too much time looking at Pinterest boards for baby girls, though. The little pink shoes are _so_ cute and tiny, I just want them all!”

“Here’s a little mom secret. _All_ baby shoes are cute.” Manny angled the baby she was holding toward Lola to show off the tiny green frog boots her son was wearing. “There hasn’t been a single time that I have seen a pair of baby shoes and _not_ wanted to immediately buy them. Seriously. The size just automatically makes me wanna squeal.” 

Lola knew exactly what Manny meant. “That level of cuteness is just like, _criminal._ ” She thought of the few items of baby clothing, mostly second-hand, she had been gifted from people at the Cantina. She knew Miles’ mom was lending them _some_ money towards clothes, plus the money she and Miles had set aside, but she still worried about being able to give her baby everything they needed. “The fact that I’m this far along and I haven’t had a hardcore splurge at a baby store is… _also_ criminal.” 

“All this talk about _criminal_ is making me think of my dear hubby.” Manny twisted the beautiful ring she had on her left hand. “So, what sort of crazy high school romance stuff have you and your baby daddy gone through?”

Lola raised a brow. “Why do you assume there’s some crazy drama?” She wasn’t sure exactly what Manny was trying to imply. 

“Because you’re a pregnant teenager?” Manny pushed her hair out of her face. “And you probably go to Degrassi, don’t you?” 

“How’d you know?” Lola asked. 

“Lucky guess, plus I could just _tell_. That place is full of drama and scandals. I’m sure tons of stuff has gone down since I left,” Manny said casually. “Props on your hair, by the way. You pull off color and bangs _way_ better than I did.” 

Lola had no idea Manny was a Degrassi grad. It was pretty cool to be talking to someone who was a part of Degrassi history. She wondered if Manny had attended the 50th anniversary event last year. Lola had been a bit busy that day, leading a protest and all. She smiled at the compliment, then confirmed what Manny had originally asked with a nod. “Yeah, I’m a grade 11 at Degrassi. My…my _Miles_ is a grade 12.” Lola’s eyes widened as the baby spit up all over Manny’s cute sweater. She made a mental note not to wear any of her absolute favorite tops around her own baby without putting a bib on them first. Baby spit...that was just the beginning of things she would need to get used to.

“Give me the scoop on the dumb drama,” Manny teased. She reached for a washcloth to wipe off her sweater, then patted her little boy on the back, totally unfazed. She seemed like a natural. “C’mon, we’ll go one to one.” 

“Like, I tell you one, you tell me one?” Lola looked for clarification. 

Manny nodded. “I’ll start,” she twirled her ring around her finger again. “Jay busted my original engagement ring out of a pawn shop window after I sold it to get tickets to Malta. I clearly got an upgrade, though.” She showed off a ring with a peridot halo around a gigantic sparkly diamond. “Peridot is my birthstone. I’m a Leo, if you couldn’t tell.” 

Lola was surprised how _cool_ Manny was. She was unlike any adult Lola had ever met. Even the coolest Cantina waitresses were only _so_ cool. Manny talked almost like she was Lola’s friend. “Ummm, my boyfriend wrote a play about me.” There was obviously more drama to that story, but Lola didn’t exactly feel like explaining the whole boyfriend-in-a-coma thing to a stranger, even a chill one like Manny. Besides, when it came down to it, the play really was all about Miles and Lola and finding hope.

“A _play?_ Sounds like an episode of _West Drive._ You know I was almost on that show?” 

Lola’s eyes widened. “No way! Are you an actress?” Lola always thought being an actress was such a cool path — even if it wasn’t the one for her, outside of Degrassi plays anyway. Lola didn’t really know what she wanted to do in the future yet. The baby obviously gave her and Miles some sense of direction, but Lola still needed to find her _passion._ Vlogging maybe, or something involving fashion or social justice...could she still pursue _any_ of those things with a baby, though? Lola was determined not to give up on school, but when she thought about juggling courses on top of a screaming infant, let alone juggling a whole _career_ on top of motherhood, her head just started spinning. She really needed to make another appointment with Ms. Grell ASAP.

“Yeah, I’m an actress. Not currently employed, though. Your boyfriend putting on any more plays soon?” Manny flashed Lola a smile. “I could use a gig,” she joked.

Lola grinned, actually finding herself enjoying a conversation with anyone besides Miles for the first time in months. She had almost forgotten why she was there, that she had snuck out of the house in the first place. _Damn_ , Lola thought — she was really risking a lifetime of grounding just to stand around waiting for Frankie and Esme in a dingy mechanic shop. Anything to get her mind off her mom and the drama for a couple of hours. Lola pulled her phone out and checked it to make sure there was no sign her dad knew she wasn’t at home complying with her sentence. Nothing from her father yet, thankfully. An Oomfchat from Miles, though...hopefully it was a cute selfie that she could screenshot and add to her growing collection of silly Miles pictures. 

The baby boy started crying, which brought Lola back to reality before she could open the message. Manny bounced the baby on her hip for a second, then threw a curious glance Lola’s way. “You wanna try holding him for a minute, Lola?”

Lola knew her face must have looked like a deer in the headlights right then. “Oh, um, I don’t, uh...” It was _majorly_ embarrassing for Lola to admit she didn’t know too much about babies, given she was almost in her third trimester. Sure, Lola had researched stuff online and watched a million YouTube tutorials and baby vlogs, but when it came to holding a _real_ baby, she just froze.

Manny brushed right past Lola’s excuses. “Ahh, c’mon,” she insisted, giggling. “You’re gonna have to learn anyway. Aren’t you due in like, _two months_?” She plopped the baby in Lola’s arms without Lola fully confirming that she was ready. 

Lola awkwardly adjusted, gripping the baby tightly to her shoulder, terrified to drop him. The fake robo-baby held _no_ comparison to holding a real baby. She had no idea babies were so... _squirmy_. “You know, you’re heavier than you look…” Lola spoke to Manny’s baby softly. “Am I totally doing this wrong?”

Manny moved closer and helped Lola adjust so that the baby was comfortably sitting on her hip. Suddenly, the squirming stopped. “Not _wrong_ , but you’ve got a few things to learn. I wouldn’t mind giving you some pointers — if you feel like you need them?”

“I’m _sure_ I do,” Lola bounced the baby on her hip with a bit more confidence. There was something actually comforting about holding a baby like this, Lola reflected. Still scary, but kind of…nice. She let herself smile, easing up a little. “But right now, I think I just wanna try holding him. What’s this little guy’s name anyway?” 

“Well right now, you’re holding Hayden. The other one is running around here somewhere...” Manny stopped to scan the mechanic shop and laid eyes on her daughter, who had ditched her doll so she could throw business cards, pamphlets and pens from the office all over the floor. “And _that’s_ Dakota. She gets into _everything._ Jay can’t say no to her.” Manny observed her daughter and smiled. “I have a little problem saying no to her too. She’s just _so cute…_ she’s gonna be _trouble_ later on, I can just feel it.” 

Lola smiled. “Looks like she’s got a head start on the trouble,” referring to the mess Dakota had made. Parenting seemed like a lot of cleaning up messes you didn’t make. Lola had enough trouble handling the messes that _she_ was making. She was only just beginning to unravel and understand the different layers of responsibility that being a parent required. “They’re beautiful. You guys have a beautiful family.” 

“And you will too,” Manny bent down and began picking up the business cards that Dakota had left on the ground.

“Yeah...I sure hope so,” Lola said wistfully, looking at Hayden’s big brown eyes and letting out a sigh. _Family_ was such a complicated word for Lola. She’d grown up thinking it meant her mom and dad and million cousins. Then her parents divorced and Lola’s whole idea of what it meant to be a family was suddenly shattered overnight.

Now, Lola and Miles were building their own little family. Lola just wanted _everything_ to be perfect for their baby, despite the totally imperfect circumstances. She didn’t want her kid to grow up being shuffled between houses, or worse, stuck with fighting parents and feeling like they weren’t _enough_ to keep their parents happy. Lola knew real life wasn’t a fairytale, but she hoped with every ounce of her tiny being that the three of them — her, Miles, and the baby — would get their happily ever after. That was all she wanted, _happily ever after._


	42. Chapter 42

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Manny and Lola bond while Esme and Jay go head to head.

“So, you own this place?” Esme inquired to Jay as she touched and tinkered with various car parts, seeming to examine things as she walked through the mechanic’s shop. Frankie looked at her girlfriend’s outfit: a tight blue and black tartan dress with a long-sleeved black turtleneck underneath. She _loved_ that Esme managed to dress up no matter the occasion. 

“What’s it to ya?” Jay shot back in a tone that was either teasing or rude — Frankie couldn’t quite tell. “I’m trying to see if I can fix your car. No need for 20 questions, kid.” 

Esme jutted her bottom lip out. “No need to be a dick. Just asking.”

Jay rolled his eyes, but gave in. “Yeah, I own the shop,” he reluctantly engaged with Esme. “I worked my way up at another place, saved up enough cash to buy a nice house for me and my honey, then I got this place after my grandma died and left me a stack of cash. I thought I sacrificed my dream so I could buy a nice _chateau_ for the wife and eventual kids, but Grandma came through and saved the day.” 

“That’s a nice story…” Esme responded, though there was a hint of something in her voice. Sourness, maybe. Frankie couldn’t quite place it. “So, you think you’re gonna be able to fix it?” 

“I’ve barely looked at it,” Jay seemed slightly annoyed by their presence. “Can’t you guys go hang out with Manny and your pregnant friend up front?” 

Frankie cut in without thinking, “We just wanna make sure this gets handled. Her dad is gonna _kill_ her otherwise.”

“I don’t need two little rich girls supervising me. I bought my own shop so I didn’t have to have anyone breathing down my neck,” Jay said. 

“I don’t know what you’re gonna try to do to my car,” Esme shot Jay a look. “Look dude, you’re honestly sort of a sketchball and my dad is _super_ strict. I don’t need you making things worse.”

Jay seemed annoyed. “I don’t _have to_ help you with your car, you know? I have the right to refuse service for any reason. I don’t have time for snotty teenagers.” 

“But apparently you _do_ have time for selling skunky weed to your employees,” Esme shot back. “You know that junk is making its way around the ravine, right?”

“Esme, come on…” Frankie attempted to discourage her from provoking Jay further. 

“I practically grew up in that ravine,” Jay seemed nostalgic for a moment. “I’m glad my legacy continues in my absence.” 

Esme rolled her eyes. “Sketchball confirmed. Anyway…you gonna help us or not?” 

“I think it’s gonna be around a thousand bucks,” Jay said. 

Frankie felt the color drain from her face. When she told Esme she would cover the damages, she’d never expected them to be _this_ much. Sure, Frankie had money, but putting a thousand bucks on the emergency credit card wasn’t something her dad would just let slide without an interrogation. “That’s a little steep, don’t you think?” 

“Snotty, _annoying_ teenager tax,” Jay didn’t seem to want to let up. Esme wasn’t being saccharine sweet, but he still seemed to be acting especially jerky. His wife seemed _much_ sweeter and more reasonable. 

“Come on, a new bumper can’t cost more than a few hundred bucks…” Esme said. “I take back the sketchball comment, if that helps.” 

“Bumpers are expensive,” Jay spoke back. “And you guys are expecting a _lot_ of hard work from someone that you’re not being very nice to.” 

Just at that moment, Jay and Manny’s oldest child, a cute little girl, waddled toward her father. “ _Daddy, up!”_ she insisted, holding her hands up so she could be picked up. 

Esme instantly jumped at the chance. “C’mon, _I’ll_ pick you up, sweetie,” she looked to Jay, then his daughter. “I’ll hold you. Your daddy is busy right now.”

“Okay!” the little girl smiled, allowing Esme to easily scoop her up. “Yay, up!” 

“Yeah, _up!”_ Esme matched her tone, lightly squeezing the girl’s cheeks and making eye contact with Jay. “You’re just adorable, aren’t you?” 

Frankie was sort of surprised to see Esme so interested in holding Jay’s child. For the most part, Esme hadn’t shown great interest in kids. Frankie figured this was mostly a ploy to mess with Jay, but her girlfriend still seemed so comfortable and happy to be cradling the tot.

“You know how to hold a kid, right? I don’t want my kid getting dropped by some...kid.” 

“Your daddy thinks I don’t know how to hold you, isn’t that funny?” Esme spoke directly to Jay’s daughter. “What’s your name, sweetie?” 

“I’m Dakota!” the little girl brightly and excitedly responded. “What’s your name?” 

“My name is Esme,” Esme introduced herself, looking back to Jay. “Your daddy isn’t gonna charge us a _thousand dollars, is he?”_

Jay shook his head. “Not gonna work. This is my shop, I can charge what I want.”

Esme stepped up. “And I can tell _whoever might be interested_ that you’re selling W-E-E-D out of your shop.” 

At least Esme was nice enough to spell out what she was basically extorting Jay for in front of his child. _Considerate,_ Frankie thought. 

“Who are you gonna tell?” Jay challenged Esme but his tone came across a little _shaken._ Esme had clearly hit a nerve. 

“There are a lot of people who may be interested in that information. And I’m _not_ talking about teenagers looking to score a cheap price on chronic from a 35-year-old high school dropout.”

“How do you even know about that stuff?” Jay inquired. 

_Oh no,_ Frankie thought. This was where she was _bound_ to get dragged in. Frankie had been the one who smoked the weed that Jay had provided to the kid from the ravine, after all. There wasn’t a chance Esme wouldn’t bring her name into this. 

Esme held Dakota on her waist with ease. “One of your little employees gave my girl Frankie here a few hits off of something the other night.” At least Esme was choosy with her words around the little girl. This was still a risky strategy and not one Frankie was entirely comfortable with, but this sort of approach was probably something she was going to have to get used to with Esme. 

“Alright, quit playing,” Jay tried to reach over for his daughter. Dakota had _zero_ interest in leaving Esme’s arms. “I really can’t do less than like, $800.”

“We can’t do more than $500, so…” Esme was _pushing it. “_ Come on. $400 and I don’t tell your wife about your little drug trafficking habit.” 

Jay put his tools down. “Come on. That’s not fair…” 

Before the conversation could continue, Manny wandered over. “Ooh, Lola! Come look at how your friend is holding Dakota! She has a _perfect_ technique.” 

Lola followed Manny with the younger baby carefully balanced in her arms. “How are you so good at holding babies? I completely _suck_ at it…” 

“You don’t suck!” Manny reassured Lola. “You just need more confidence! Like…what’s your name?” Manny directed a question toward Esme.

“Esme!” Dakota answered for Esme, who smiled sweetly at Manny, then threw daggers with her stare to Jay. 

“That’s right!” Esme smiled. “Your daddy said it was only gonna be $350 to fix my bumper, right?” 

“Right!” the little girl confirmed excitedly with no idea what she was saying. 

“You _just_ said $400,” Jay called Esme out. “C’mon. You’re basically extorting me at this point.” He quickly looked over to Manny, then back to Esme. “I told you. $700 is the lowest I can go. Seriously. The parts are gonna cost me _at least_ that much. That doesn’t even account for labor.”

Manny cut in, clearly on the girls’ side. “Is a bumper _really_ that much?” 

“It depends on the car,” Jay responded. “This girl has an _expensive_ ride with some _expensive_ damage.” 

“Come on, Jay. They’re teenagers. You think they have a thousand dollars to spare?” 

“Do I look like a charity?” Jay responded with a bit of attitude, then reeled it back and immediately apologized to his wife. “Sorry, dimples. I didn’t mean to raise my voice.” 

Frankie decided to cut in. “Esme’s dad is already seriously pissed. Can’t you do us a favor and cut down the price _this one time_? Didn’t you ever do something stupid when you were a teenager?” 

Manny shot a glance at Jay. _Clearly_ the answer was _yes._ “Come on, Jay. Think about how my dad was when I was their age. Do you _really_ want to be the reason a girl gets completely skewered by her dad?” 

“Can’t say I’d lose sleep over it,” Jay admitted, which caused Manny to lightly slap his arm. “This little she-devil doesn’t _deserve_ a ridiculous price cut. I gotta put food on the table!” 

“ _Jay!”_ Manny chastised her husband. “We don’t call teenage girls _she-devils_! Especially when they’re paying customers.” 

“ _Barely_ ,” Jay remarked. 

Esme circled around Jay, still holding his daughter. “You don’t wanna disappoint any of your _customers,_ do you?” 

Frankie was surprised and thankful that Manny didn’t pick up on the subtextual extortion. “Come on, what about $500?” Frankie tried, and Esme dug her elbow into her rib as if to say _don’t mess it up._ Frankie could afford it though, so she shook Esme off. 

Jay sighed. He hesitated for a moment, like he was weighing whether it was worth it to lose out on a couple hundred bucks if it would put an end to this conversation. “$500 is fine,” he grumbled, finally caving to their game.

Esme seemed annoyed. “I almost had him…” she whispered, then placed Jay and Manny’s daughter back on the shop floor and crossed her arms. 

Jay picked his daughter up and placed several kisses on both of her cheeks. “Can you take them up to the front now, Manny? I need to work in peace. _Away_ from the teenage extortionists.” 

Frankie didn’t understand. She had offered to pay for this anyway. Why did Esme need to drive the price down so far? Just because she could? Frankie understood what Esme was _going for,_ but pushing Jay further, especially with his wife around, just seemed unnecessarily risky and kind of mean. $500 was definitely a little steep for one repair, but it wasn’t like Frankie’s family wasn’t wealthy. Besides, didn’t Esme brag about wearing $200 skirts? The issue of parents aside, it wasn’t like either of them were exactly struggling financially. 

Manny obliged, encouraging the girls and Dakota to come back to the front office area of the shop. “Come on, girls. We don’t wanna get all oily anyway.” She took Dakota from Jay’s arm and tried to wipe a spot of grease away with her fingers. _No such luck._ She grabbed a towel and scrubbed a little harder but there was still a big dark spot on her daughter’s outfit. “Ugh, I hate this place sometimes…” she trailed off, still trying her best to remove the stain. 

…

Manny went to the bathroom with the kids to attempt to clean their outfits up, leaving Lola alone with Frankie and Esme at the front. Lola couldn’t help but feel completely confused and out of the loop as to what was going on. “Why were you trying to drive the price down?” Lola asked Esme. “Frankie’s _rich_.”

“Because!” Esme started, keeping her voice down. “We had dirt on him!”

Frankie cut in, looking uneasy. “Esme…”

Lola laughed under her breath. “You have _dirt_ on Jay? He’s like, in his thirties. What could possibly be _juicy_ about him?”

“You know that kid Frankie smoked weed with at the ravine party? He got the weed from _Jay!_ ”

Lola froze. She _did not_ know the kid Frankie smoked weed with at the ravine party. In fact, she had no idea Frankie had smoked _anything_ at the ravine party at all. She turned to Frankie in a state of disbelief, “Wait, so you crashed Esme’s car because you were _high?_ And you didn’t tell me?”

“I didn’t want you to be mad…” Frankie admitted. She looked shaky and guilty as hell, almost like she was about to cry right in the middle of the shop. “I’m sorry, Lo! It was _so_ stupid. I thought I could handle myself…Miles used to drive us to school stoned all the time.” 

Lola couldn’t even look at her best friend. It wasn’t like smoking weed was some evil crime, but for Frankie to do it and then _drive_ her when she’d promised she was sober, not to mention _lie_ about it afterwards...Lola was honestly beyond pissed. “So you just drove me, _pregnant,_ while you were stoned?!” she snapped at Frankie, not really caring about the volume of her voice anymore. 

Frankie spoke up, her eyes welling with tears now. She really did look genuinely sorry, but Lola couldn’t shake this feeling of anger. “I’m _so_ sorry, Lo. I didn’t mean to- I just...I’m _really_ sorry,” Frankie cried, blinking back tears. Esme wrapped her arms around Frankie’s shoulders in an attempt to comfort her, something Lola was honestly not used to seeing Esme do with people.

Lola knew she should probably ease up, but she was too worked up to stop now. It wasn’t so much what Frankie had done, but more that she wasn’t honest with Lola when she’d fucked up. Lola was starting to feel like a ticking time bomb of hormones — she was just _really_ sick of nearly everyone in her life not being honest with her. “You lied to me, Franks. After I had to spend all night at the hospital worried sick about my baby because of _you._ What if the accident had been way worse? What if-” 

_“Lola,_ she clearly feels bad... _”_ Esme cleared her throat. Frankie was crying into her shoulder now. 

Lola took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. She didn’t want to make Frankie cry, but she really didn’t want to talk to her right now either. She was just exhausted, angry, hormonal...the last 24 hours had been a total nightmare, to say the least. More than anything, Lola was just _tired_ of everything. Tired of being lied to, tired of being pregnant, tired of feeling like a scared little girl while everyone else made decisions for her. “Forget it...I’ll see you guys later.”

Frankie glanced up, still a snot-nosed, blubbering mess. “Lo, _wait_. Where are you going?”

“I’m calling Miles to pick me up,” Lola said without a hint of emotion in her voice. She pulled out her cell and turned to the door to walk out, adding, “At least I can trust _one_ Hollingsworth.” 


	43. Chapter 43

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Miles and Lola try to enjoy a moment alone, but the calm doesn't last long.

“I can’t _believe_ she did this!” Lola grabbed a pillow from Miles’ bed and tossed it across the room. She wasn’t sure if it was her hormones or what, but she was _pissed_ and she just couldn’t seem to shake it. 

After Miles came to pick her up from the mechanic shop, Lola told him the Frankie story in the car and cried the whole way. She really didn’t want to go home, so they drove to the Hollingsworths’. Only Hunter was home, so at least they had some privacy. Lola knew if she got caught being out right now her father would probably ground her for the rest of her pregnancy, but she honestly couldn’t bring herself to care. Everything just sucked, and she didn’t want to be anywhere other than Miles’ arms right now.

“I honestly can’t either…” Miles said, still seeming a bit overtaken with shock. “I wouldn’t expect Frankenstein to do something so stupid. This is more of a _me_ move.” 

Lola reached over and put her hand on Miles’. “The _old_ you. You would never do something so stupid and reckless now.”

“We all make mistakes…” Miles tried weakly, but he clearly couldn’t justify his sister’s actions. “I’m just glad you’re _okay_.”

Lola wanted to just be okay with being okay, but she _wasn’t._ She was so mad at Frankie she couldn’t even think straight. Why, of all times, did she choose that night to get stoned? And why did she not tell anyone that she wasn’t sober? Why did she get behind the wheel and _knowingly_ endanger the people she loved? Lola’s stomach churned as she thought of what could have happened if Frankie had caused a more severe crash.

“This was a _really_ stupid mistake. She put me _and_ our baby in danger.” Lola hid her face in her hands, wishing she could just turn her emotions off and get over it. She _couldn’t_. Miles being so calm about all this also threw Lola off a bit, honestly. She knew Frankie was his sister and he was of course naturally protective of her, but shouldn’t he be a _little_ more pissed and on Lola’s side? Especially when the safety of their baby was involved.

Miles reached over to rub Lola’s back. “I feel like this wouldn’t have happened if she hadn’t been hanging with _Esme._ I knew something bad would come of it.”

Lola just scoffed. It wasn’t like Esme was her absolute bestie, but it still annoyed her that Miles’ first instinct was to deflect the blame to Esme instead of his sister. With everything that had happened, Lola hadn’t even gotten the chance to tell Miles the major ‘Frankie and Esme are dating’ news yet. It just seemed like trivial gossip now. She was _so_ pissed at Frankie, she couldn’t think straight. She just felt like a total hormonal mess. “Frankie’s a big girl, Miles. She can make her own decisions. _She_ chose to get stoned and get behind the wheel.”

“I know, I’m just…” Miles stumbled, always tending to want to stick up for his siblings out of habit, even if they didn’t necessarily deserve it. He let out a large sigh, seeming sort of exhausted by everything. “I’m sorry, you’re right. I’ll talk with Frankie when she gets home. What can I do to make you feel better in the meantime?” He squeezed Lola’s hand and planted kisses on her fingers, giving her his big ‘I’m sorry’ puppy dog eyes, which he knew Lola couldn’t resist. 

Lola brought her lips to Miles’, closing her eyes and losing herself in a kiss with him for a few moments. “This helps,” she continued kissing her boyfriend, her lips traveling down from his lips to his chiseled jaw. “Your family may be _exhausting,_ but at least you’re _really_ cute.”

“Oh yeah?” Miles smirked, gripping Lola by the hips and pulling her close to him. “You know, we _are_ home alone. I mean, Hunter’s here, but he doesn’t really count. He hasn’t really left his room since he got a mini-fridge.” 

Lola thought back to when Hunter had barged in only a day or so ago, right before the ravine party. “Not true. He saw me in my bra like, yesterday.” It was crazy to think so little time had passed. 

“Are you trying to make me jealous of my _brother_?” Miles teased. “He told me about that little incident. Said he came in to say something about the robo-babies and got a mouthful from Frankie. Then he made some gross comment about your boobs getting bigger...” Miles’ fingers slowly went from tangled in Lola’s blue hair to traveling down toward her chest. “I pegged him with a muffin for that one, by the way,” he said, then kissed Lola’s cheek. “You’re not wrong about my family being exhausting,” he admitted. “Still cool with joining it?” 

Lola couldn’t help but blush and smile. _Technically_ she would be joining the Hollingsworth family, in a way. “You’re worth it.” She nuzzled her nose on his, then backed away and covered her now-pink cheeks with her hands. 

Miles reached for her hand back, pulling her on top of him and planting a kiss on her lips. Lola kissed him right back, allowing herself to just get lost in her boyfriend’s arms for a moment. As they kept kissing, Lola felt her hormones shift from _pissed_ to kind of… _i_ _n the mood._ “Mmm…” she sighed contentedly, feeling the weight of her belly between them as Miles kissed her neck and sent shivers down her spine.

The baby kicked just then, startling both Lola and Miles a tiny bit. Lola’s cheeks turned pink and Miles smirked at her teasingly. There was no doubt that hooking up was a bit _different_ nowadays, but they usually still managed, at least whenever they were lucky enough to find a rare moment of privacy like this. After the pregnancy bomb dropped, Miles’ mother wouldn’t let Lola even set _foot_ in his room when she was home. Lola’s father also watched them like a hawk every time Miles came around the Cantina. Lola couldn’t help but find it a little ironic they’d chosen _now_ to get strict. After all, the worst thing that could happen already did. 

“Now, where were we..?” Miles reached under the back of Lola’s shirt and began trying to undo the hooks of her bra. Again, there was a soft _kick_. 

Lola giggled under her breath. “I think the baby recognizes your voice.” She leaned in to kiss him again. God, she _never_ wanted to stop kissing Miles.

 _Kick, kick, kick._ The baby was on a roll now, squirming and kicking like it was prepping for a karate tournament. Definitely major Gemini energy, Lola noted to herself. _Kick._

Lola and Miles looked at each other and burst out laughing. “Sorry…” she giggled, rolling off of him. “I guess this isn’t quite working.”

Miles just shook his head laughing, then pulled her against his chest into a cuddle. “Is it weird to say you feel even better than the first time I touched you? You know, like this…” He reached down and tickled her ribs slightly.

“What do you mean?” Lola asked. 

“It’s always felt great to be... _close to you_ ,” Miles started. “But now, I don’t know if it’s the time we’ve spent together or the fact that there’s a little _us_ in there…” His hand rested on Lola’s bump, slowly rubbing and causing another _kick_ in response. “Hey, baby…” Miles spoke softly, shifting down to speak directly to Lola’s stomach. 

The baby kicked a few more times, seeming to really respond to Miles’ words. Lola felt like she was melting watching her boyfriend interact with their baby. Was it really possible to love someone so much? She’d almost completely forgotten what she’d been so worked up about earlier at this point. 

Miles’ hand rested on Lola’s hip. “I just want to lay here and feel her kick,” he said. He paused and added, “Her _or_ him…” 

“I feel like it’s a girl too,” Lola admitted, even more sure of her intuition now that she knew Miles felt it too. It made her happy to be reminded of how totally in sync they were with everything. “I don’t wanna find out for sure til’ they’re born, but…it’s just a feeling I have…”

Miles looked up at Lola and grinned. “I’ll love our baby no matter what — I already do. But, it would be awesome to have a daughter.”

“We could name her…” Lola thought for a second. _Hope_ , she wanted to say. 

“Wait. Before you say it, I’ve been thinking…” Miles spoke up. “I want to wait until they’re born to name them. I want to meet our baby first. I know it’s weird, but considering my dad named me after him…I never felt like I could just _be myself._ I always kinda felt like he had this _mold_ for me set out before I was even conceived. He always expected that I’d follow in his footsteps...” Miles thought for a second. “I just don’t want to push any expectations on her — or him.”

Lola felt a smile overpower her features. She loved how _thoughtful_ Miles was. She was so grateful that her child, no matter who they ended up being or what name they ended up with, would have a dad like Miles. 

“Speaking of all that…” Miles shifted the subject slightly. “I was wondering if you wanted to hear what I’ve written for the London Writer’s Academy.” He looked at her sheepishly and quickly clarified, “Not because I’m going _this_ year. You know that. But, maybe if they let me defer a year or two…”

Lola nodded and smiled to reassure him, “Yeah, I know. And of _course_ I want to hear it. I _always_ want to hear your writing.” She thought back to that fateful first night they’d spent together and how much fun she’d had writing the play with him. Other than maybe those alumni at the Degrassi protest last year, Miles had been the first person to really take Lola’s ideas seriously, to make her feel like her input was _important._ Feeling like Miles genuinely valued her opinions felt _good_. 

“Alright…I’ve done a few drafts but I still feel like some of the wording is iffy,” Miles seemed anxious all of a sudden, downplaying his hard work and trying his best to seem like he wasn’t _too_ confident. “I’ve got the file on my phone…” He took a moment to pull up what he had written so that he could read it aloud. 

Lola noticed he was slightly shaking. Things were undoubtedly _stressful_ these days and she knew Miles suffered from anxiety. She wasn’t surprised he was nervous, but if there were any small ways she could reassure him, she’d do it. “It’s gonna be _great_ ,” Lola encouraged him, placing a kiss on Miles’ nose. She sank against the pillows to get comfy, then motioned for him to begin. 

“All my life, I’ve struggled with my identity. Whether to be what my father wants or rebel against him. This has left me afraid. Afraid to be labeled, afraid to identify as _bisexual_...but that is a part of me. And it’s one of the many ideas I intend to explore as a writer...”

Lola rubbed small circles into Miles’ back, trying to provide comfort as he poured his heart out. This was _really good_ so far. There was no doubt in Lola’s mind that Miles would get in, whenever he felt he was ready to go. She still had zero clue how this London thing would work out between the two of them and a baby, but this wasn’t the moment to stress about all that. Now was just time to listen to her boyfriend’s words and make him feel supported. Lola just _loved_ dating a writer — listening to Miles express his deepest feelings like this, knowing he trusted her with his most personal thoughts, just made her melt. 

“My bisexuality is an important part of me, but it’s not the only unique thing about me. I’m also about to become a father...” Miles paused and looked at Lola and she rubbed his hand reassuringly, pressing him to continue. “I was terrified at first. Not just because I’m still a teenager, but also because I didn’t exactly have the greatest father growing up. I never really saw myself being a dad. I’m still scared, but more than anything now, I just want to do _better._ Not just for myself, but for my kid too. For the first time in my life, I feel like I can actually become the person I want to be. My girlfriend taught me that you can find hope in any situation. And that’s what I want to do as a writer. Tell my stories so other people can find hope too.”

Miles slowly put his phone down and looked over to Lola, still a bit shaky. “Well? What did you think?”

Lola wiped her eyes, suddenly a bit teary. She wasn’t sure if it was the hormones or just because she was _so_ proud of Miles, but she was getting emotional. “I think you’re _amazing_ ,” she said, unable to stop smiling. “I’m so proud of you. I think that school would be so lucky to have you.”

Miles grinned, relaxing now. “Only if you and the baby can come with me,” he said, placing a kiss on her blue head. He combed his fingers through her hair, continuing, “I couldn’t have done any of this without you, Lo. I mean it. With you, I feel like I can finally be myself. You’re the only person who’s ever made me feel like just being _me_ was enough. I’ve spent so much time chasing after and trying to make it work with the wrong people...but now, with you, I don’t have to do any of that. And I know things aren’t perfect, but also...they kind of are?”

Lola felt her cheeks turn completely pink. “I love you so much,” she whispered, and leaned in to kiss him. The baby kicked softly again, causing both Lola and Miles to laugh. Miles was right — things _weren’t_ perfect, but they also kind of were, in their own strange, messy way. 

Lola laid against Miles’ chest and let out a tired, but content sigh as he ran his fingers through her blue curls. So much had changed since their first night together, but one thing was still exactly the same: there was nowhere Lola felt safer being than in this bed with Miles.

…

“Alright, I should probably get out of here...” Lola sighed, attempting to stretch her legs out so she could get off of Miles’ bed. She had been situated _perfectly_ with a pillow behind her back on his bed for the past hour or so, which had been the first time she had felt truly comfortable in days. “I’m already grounded for like, infinity. No need to completely freak my dad out or make him even _more_ mad when he realizes I’m not home.” 

Miles reached a hand out, helping Lola stand up and steady herself. “I don’t want the fun to be over yet,” he placed a kiss on Lola’s forehead and ruffled her messy blue hair. Even though nothing above a PG-13 rating had happened between them in Miles’ bed _this time_ , Lola had still managed to get some pretty intense bedhead. “You might wanna fix that.”

“This is the new style, though!” Lola insisted as she approached the mirror in Miles’ room and laughed at her reflection. Her mascara was all over the place, which quickly reminded Lola of the whole Frankie situation that she had been crying over earlier. Miles had done a good job in making her almost completely forget about that. _Almost._ She did her best to shrug it off for now. That whole mess was _tomorrow_ Lola’s problem. 

Lola’s eyes weren’t stuck on the surface flaws that she had initially noticed, though. As she observed her reflection, she couldn’t stop looking at the physical changes pregnancy had caused, from the way everything on her body looked slightly swollen to the fact that she was pretty much stuck wearing nothing but maternity clothing and old baggy sweats 24/7. Lola kept thinking she’d eventually get used to the changes pregnancy brought, but it seemed like things changed more and more every day. At least most things with Miles never changed. 

Lola turned around to see Miles holding her pink slippers. “Sit back down on the bed,” he chuckled. “Let me help you out with these slippers, Cinderella.”

The thought of not having to struggle to put her shoes on immediately appealed to Lola. Her belly had begun to really get in the way of _everything._ “I’ve learned in the past few months to take all the help I can get,” she sighed with a tired smile, placing herself on the edge of Miles’ bed. 

Miles got down on one knee to help her put her slippers on, grinning. “Well, it _is_ kinda thanks to me that you’re in this condition in the first place. This is the least I can do.”

Just then, a sharp voice cut through the otherwise silent house, “Miles? Are you home?” 

“My dad,” Miles immediately froze up and the color drained from his face. “The hell...why is he at the house right now?” 

The voice sounded _close._ Lola and Miles exchanged panicked looks. Miles quickly slid Lola’s slippers onto her feet and stood up, wiping his hands on his pants before reaching for the doorknob. 

Miles’ father grabbed the knob and attempted to turn it before Miles’ hand got a chance to grasp the knob. The door was locked,which gave Lola about ten seconds to make herself look halfway decent. She quickly rubbed the smeared mascara from under her eyes and did her best to smooth her hair. 

A loud knock from the other side of the door indicated Miles’ father was _not_ happy about the locked door. “What have your mother and I told you about locking your door?” Mr. Hollingsworth’s voice boomed. Lola wondered if he knew that she was there with Miles. If he didn’t know, he was definitely about to find out. 

Miles slowly turned the lock on his door and a distinctive _click_ rang into the air like the bell at the beginning of a wrestling match. _Here we go,_ Lola braced herself for either anger or awkwardness when the door opened. 

“Miles! What are you- oh…Lola…” Mr. Hollingsworth had started with an angry, booming tone toward Miles, but lowered his voice slightly once he realized Lola was there. “I just...you know, we have a rule in this house about the bedroom doors…especially considering…” Miles’ father stared at Lola’s stomach before bringing his intimidating gaze back to his son. 

“We weren’t doing anything,” Miles said. Parts of Miles’ demeanor instantly changed when his father was around, Lola noticed. His voice got slightly shaky, his body language seemed more closed off…it seemed like his confidence always went right down the drain the second his father appeared. Lola hated to see that. 

Lola decided to try to help. She knew it was probably a lost cause to try to reason with the senior Miles Hollingsworth, but she was so naturally protective and defensive when it came to her boyfriend. She couldn’t _stand_ seeing him hurt, especially when he’d been so happy just minutes ago. “We weren’t, I promise,” she tried. “I just needed someone to talk to about-”

“To be frank, I don’t really care,” Mr. Hollingsworth shut Lola down immediately. “I have a few members of the press coming in less than an hour. I don’t want anything or… _anyone_ around the house that could shift the focus of the afternoon. I’m sure you understand where I’m coming from.” 

Lola honestly _didn’t_ fully understand. Was it that Mr. Hollingsworth didn’t want the media to see _her_ and ask questions? She knew full well how Mr. Hollingsworth felt about his son becoming a teenage father, but did he just expect Lola to hide her pregnancy, and eventual baby, forever? She had heard countless stories from Miles and even Frankie and Hunter about how their father was all about appearances. According to Miles, their father would be a monster behind closed doors and do anything to save face for his own reputation, even if it meant treating his family’s feelings like his last priority. She wasn’t sure how she felt about her child being around that kind of person, and she somehow doubted Miles would be eager to let his father hold their newborn baby at the hospital. 

The three sat in awkward silence for a moment before Mr. Hollingsworth cleared his throat and spoke again. “So, now that you’ve had your fun breaking the rules, locking your door, and _fooling around_ …” he spoke firmly toward Miles, “I think it’s time for your girlfriend to leave.” 

“We weren’t fooling around,” Miles defended himself. Lola grabbed his arm and squeezed a little, hoping that she could silently encourage her boyfriend to _avoid_ conflict with his father, no matter how annoying his father’s assumptions were. “Lola needs to go home anyway, so don’t think I’m doing this because of _you.”_

“Why can’t you just do what I ask for _once,_ Miles? _Without_ attitude. Why do you always have to be _difficult?"_

Lola stood up from Miles’ bed without help this time and reached her hand out for Miles’. “C’mon, let’s go. I really _do_ need to get home,” she said, walking past Mr. Hollingsworth and watching his fake smile turn sour. Lola had learned from own parents that sometimes it was better to just not engage _._ This was _definitely_ one of those times. 

_“Wait. Miles.”_

Miles glanced over at his father with tired eyes, looking like he was hopeful for an apology that he knew he was unlikely to get. 

“Can you please ask your sister not to bring any friends home today either? Your mother told me that someone spent the night last night. We just don’t need any _distractions_ around here when I have people over for work-related things.”

Miles charged away wordlessly, gripping Lola’s hand tightly as they made their way down the hallway away from his father. “Let’s just get you home before your dad gets home…” he mumbled, grabbing his car keys from the hook by the front door and leading the way to his car. 

Lola squeezed Miles’ fingers tightly and sighed. It seemed like the universe just _had_ to go out of its way to remind them once again that things were, in fact, _not_ perfect.


	44. Chapter 44

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frankie makes a bold decision that surprises both Miles and their father. Miles tries to give his sister advice on how to handle her current chaos.

“Thanks again for helping me get my car fixed,” Esme said, pulling up to the driveway in front of Frankie’s house in her freshly fixed up ride. Jay had managed to get Esme’s car in mint condition again for $500. He even threw in an oil change after Frankie secretly slipped him fifty bucks while Esme was in the bathroom. Esme had worked hard hustling Jay, but Frankie still felt sort of icky about basically blackmailing someone into doing work for cheap, especially when he had two small kids to feed. “I owe you one.” 

Frankie shook her head, but her attention was suddenly split. “Why are there so many black cars here?” There were at least six near-identical cars parked that Frankie had never seen before parked in and around the driveway. Esme parked a few feet away from one of the cars and just as she put the car into park, the doors of one of the cars opened. 

“It’s the mayor’s daughter!” a voice called out, and suddenly a camera appeared in Frankie’s face outside of the passenger’s seat window. “You must be _Francesca!_ Could we get a few words about your father? Maybe you could answer a few of our questions before the event?”

Along with the camera came a perky brunette with glasses, whom Frankie assumed to be a reporter of some sort. It would’ve been nice if her father had let her know _beforehand_ that she was going to be walking into a lion’s den full of local press when she got home. He never was the considerate type. He didn’t live with them anymore, but that didn’t stop him from using the house for every press event so they all looked like one big happy family.

“Sorry, I’ve really gotta get inside,” Frankie responded to the woman, but her gaze was on Esme. There was still a lot Frankie needed to talk to Esme about — why she’d pulled that little extortion scheme with Jay and how on earth to fix the whole Lola situation, for starters. Right now though, Frankie just wished they had some privacy to properly say goodbye. Frankie was _dying_ to kiss her girlfriend again, so much so that she had been quietly planning the _perfect way_ to lean in and kiss Esme goodbye since they left the mechanic’s shop. Frankie was already a nervous mess still getting used to having a _girlfriend —_ having an _audience_ was just making things even more awkward. 

“So…I’ll see you?” Esme seemed to pick up on Frankie’s standoffishness, but it was doubtful that she wasn’t reading too much into it or assuming the worst in some way. Frankie didn’t want that to happen, but the press had eyes on her now. Any semblance of privacy at this point was lost. Frankie resented her father for valuing his dumb reputation over anyone and everything else. She _highly_ doubted he was going to be thrilled that another one of his children was going through — what had he called it when Miles came out? — a ‘ _ridiculous phase.’_ Maybe her father had come around about Miles’ bisexuality eventually, or at least learned to bite his tongue...but somehow Frankie had a feeling it would be different when it came to his only daughter.

“Ah, I see the media has found one of my beautiful children!” Mr. Hollingsworth emerged immediately with his _mayor_ voice, which was very official and fake-nice. Frankie _hated_ when he used that tone. “I’m the one fielding questions here today, _not_ my lovely kids.” 

Frankie’s eyes caught her father’s. He gestured for her to wrap things up and get inside the house. There was a split second where Frankie _almost_ followed his silent orders the way she used to when she was younger and blindly trusted that her father cared about what was best for her and her brothers. A highlight reel of her father’s worst moments started playing in her mind — the times where he put his own reputation or interests above the family, the times where he was physically threatening or outright _abusive_ when his temper got bad…Frankie’s angst got the best of her and before she knew it… 

“I just need a moment to say goodbye to my _girlfriend,_ ” Frankie spoke directly to the reporter that originally approached her, but her voice was loud enough for everyone to hear it. “So unless you’re gonna be reporting on a bisexual teen romance, I’m _pretty sure_ my dad would rather you guys focus on _him.”_

Esme let out a shocked laugh, clearly proud of Frankie’s bold move.

Frankie glanced back to her father, who for _once_ in his life was speechless. The daggers his eyes were shooting said enough, though. He was _not happy._

The reporters slowly dissipated and headed into the house at Frankie’s father’s request. A couple of them lingered a few feet away pretending to mess with camera and microphone equipment hoping to catch more _juicy_ details. 

Frankie shrugged. “How was that?” she asked before leaning in and planting a kiss on Esme’s soft lips. Their foreheads met in the middle, resting against one another for a moment. Frankie’s eyes examined all of the tiny details that made her girlfriend beautiful. Esme’s deep, dark brown eyes, her beautiful long black hair which was nearly always braided to the side, the small freckle on her top lip...Frankie couldn’t help but kiss her again. 

Esme pulled away from the kiss and smiled. There was a special _glint_ in her eyes. 

“You’re either up to trouble or…” Frankie trailed off. 

“I’m happy. With you,” Esme admitted, smiling hard as she looked into Frankie’s eyes. This felt so intimate, but so _right_ …nobody had ever made her heart race before like this.

Before Frankie or Esme could say another word, Frankie’s father returned, looking stressed. 

“Your friend needs to go home,” he spoke in a hushed tone that still managed to convey his anger. “And you need to…I don’t know what I need to do with you. I thought you were better than your brother. _Clearly_ there are some problems that need addressing.”

 _And you have no interest in actually addressing them,_ Frankie thought. _You only care when it affects your image._

If only Frankie had the courage to say something like that, she thought. She knew she wasn’t going to get through to her father, especially right now. Frankie looked over to Esme with a dramatic sigh. “I gotta go. See you at school tomorrow?” 

Esme nodded, unable to wipe the smile off her face despite the more serious tone Mr. Hollingsworth was projecting. “See you tomorrow,” she placed a kiss on Frankie’s cheek. “By the way, I’m _pansexual.”_

“Huh?” Frankie leaned in again after unlatching the passenger door. 

“You called it a _bisexual_ teen romance. I dunno about you, but I’m pan.”

Frankie made eye contact with her father, who was clearly fuming at this point. This was unfortunately _not_ the time to discuss the intricacies of Frankie’s sexuality. Save that topic for a later date, she decided. “Cool,” Frankie said simply. “Now I gotta go before my dad _explodes_.”

“I know the feeling. Wish me luck at home.” Esme put her car into drive and placed her foot on the brake, preparing to drive off. 

“Good luck,” Frankie quickly leaned over the middle console of Esme’s car and planted a kiss right on her lips — partially because she had been wanting to forever, and partially to spite her father, if Frankie were being honest with herself. 

“ _Goodbye,_ ” Frankie’s father urged the girls to end the interaction. “My daughter and I need to talk. _After_ I try to salvage this press event...” 

Esme finally pulled away once Frankie shut the passenger door, turning up her radio to blast some angsty indie rock song. “See you later, _Francesca!_ ” she shouted from the window as she drove away, never missing the opportunity to tease.

“Get in the house. Now.” Frankie’s father ordered. He had a way of making people — _especially_ Frankie, feel so _small_ and she absolutely hated it. She understood now more than ever why Miles rebelled so much when he was her age. Frankie followed her father inside like a puppy that had just been reprimanded, bracing herself for the explosive drama that was bound to be ahead. 

...

Frankie placed herself at the bar in the kitchen after pouring herself a cup of apple juice and snagging a chocolate scone from the basket that always sat on the kitchen counter. The scone was actually sort of stale this time, unusual for the Hollingsworth house. Frankie’s mother was the _queen_ of offering the baked goods that had started to go stale to the maids, who usually graciously took whatever extra food the family didn’t eat — which honestly, was a lot. Frankie’s mother also happened to be the queen of overdoing every meal, especially breakfast. She liked having a full spread most mornings, even though most of the family barely ate a bite. Frankie wondered as she finished off the somewhat stale scone just how much the smorgasbords her mother was a sucker for cost. She pondered the thought, shrugged, then grabbed another chocolate scone. 

She had no idea how long this press event was going to take or when her father would return to yell at her for embarrassing him and having a girlfriend. This all felt a bit like deja vu. Speaking of _Miles_ …

Miles waltzed into the kitchen with a robo-baby on his hip. Frankie watched as he opened the pantry and snagged a bag of pretzels. “What’s for dinner?”

“No idea,” Frankie responded with a mouthful of chocolate. She washed it down with some apple juice before she spoke again. “What have you been up to?”

“I’ve been hanging in Hunter’s room, borrowing his fancy gaming computer to play this new online game with Chewy,” Miles responded, accentuating the end of his sentence with a loud _crunch_ on a pretzel. “I’m just down here to grab snacks and drinks. Hunter’s mini-fridge is running low and we need fuel.” 

“You and _Hunter?_ Voluntarily hanging out?” Frankie was surprised. 

Miles shrugged. “Well, I had to check on the robo-babies anyway since you, Lola, and Esme all ditched your projects and left Hunter on full-time babysitting duty.” 

“I actually forgot that thing existed,” Frankie admitted with a soft laugh. “Are they all like, totally dead now?” 

“You know, that’s what I was expecting, but actually _no,_ ” Miles said, his features twisting into a silly smirk. “He actually renamed them all with names from _Lord of The Rings._ It was kind of cute. He even made a mini-nursery in his room for them.”

“You’re _kidding_ ,” Frankie’s jaw dropped. She would have to see this to believe it. 

Miles laughed. “Okay, it’s less of a nursery and more of a big cardboard box with an old blanket that he puts the dolls in, but _still._ When I saw that I was thinking…maybe Hunter _does_ have a heart after all.”

“Hmph,” Frankie rolled her eyes. “Perhaps…” 

“Why the sour mood?” Miles asked. “Let me guess…it’s either Dad or Lola.”

Frankie put her head in her hands. “Both,” she sighed. “But mostly Dad.” The way her father reacted to Frankie rebelling against him was on a full-on loop in her mind. Now that Miles brought up _Lola,_ though, Frankie remembered just how screwed up almost every aspect of her life was at the moment. 

Miles sat down next to Frankie and set the robo-baby on the counter. “Do you wanna talk about it?” 

“I dunno, it’s a whole thing…” Frankie said sheepishly. Miles tended to be a pretty good listener and he was undoubtedly the family member who would understand this specific situation the most. “I wouldn’t even know where to start.”

“Since it’s Dad, I’m pretty sure I can safely assume it had something to do with the surprise press he invited over?”

“I don’t get why he springs this crap on us and just expects us to _go with it_ and be his perfect little angels,” Frankie was increasingly frustrated at her father’s lack of consideration. “Like, is it _that hard_ to send a quick text keeping us in the loop? Why is our father so sucky at communication?” 

“It’s because _he_ sucks in general. Nothing new, right?” Miles responded, still munching on his pretzels. 

Frankie shrugged. “I guess…he’s just so _ridiculous.”_

“I’m gonna need more details,” Miles inquired. 

“This reporter tried to talk to me and Esme when she was dropping me off.” Frankie starter. “Dad came out and tried to rush me inside and I _might_ have outed my relationship with Esme just to piss him off...”

“Your _what_ now?” Miles cut Frankie off, eyes widened in shock. “You guys are _dating_ …? Does that mean you’re…?”

“I don’t know _what_ I am yet. Bi or… I dunno,” Frankie shrugged. “Esme said she was _pansexual_. I honestly don’t even know what that means, but I figure I’ll Google it later.”

Miles shrugged before getting back to the topic at hand, still looking completely bewildered by the revelation. “Wait — so did you tell Dad or the reporters?” 

“...both?” Frankie thought over her bold action for a moment and found herself actually feeling kind of proud. She didn’t regret it — not one bit. Her father had been running rampant controlling the whole family for so long. It was time for Frankie to take that control back. After all, she _was_ turning 17 soon. She needed to learn and gain some independence sooner rather than later.

Miles seemed surprised by Frankie’s rebellion. “So you told the reporters _and_ Dad that you’re dating Esme? Then what?”

“He sent the reporters and Esme away and he gave me that disappointed, angry look,” Frankie recalled the look on her father’s face and shivered a little. “I’m _sure_ you know that look.”

“Oh, yeah. I’ve seen that look, gotten that lecture…when did _you_ become the problem child?” Miles asked. “I thought that was _my_ gig.”

Frankie smiled. “You’re still the MVP at pissing parents off. I just took a few pages from your book,” she thought for a second before speaking again. “I was just...tired of him making us feel ashamed for existing in a way that doesn’t benefit him, you know?”

“I know the feeling,” Miles said. “He’s never gonna accept us for who we are or even meet us in the middle. We’re not the perfect cookie cutter family he wanted to be able to parade around so he pushes us away.” 

Frankie knew this feeling was far from new to Miles. He’d been the main target of their father's overbearance for _years_. There was part of her that felt more bonded to her brother after standing up against their father and putting a target on her own back. She knew if Miles could get through all of those difficult times that he had disappointed their father, she could do it too. 

Miles cut in, interrupting Frankie’s train of thought. “Just don’t care too much what he thinks,” he patted her on the shoulder with a light smile. “At the end of the day, it doesn’t really matter, right?”

“Right,” Frankie responded, hanging her head down a bit. Miles was right, at the end of the day it didn’t really matter what their father thought or said. When Frankie was younger, she would’ve fought back against that statement thinking that she needed her parents approval and validation in every situation. Now, she knew that was impossible, especially with their father. It didn’t mean she didn’t _want_ that validation from the people who brought her into the world — she just knew she couldn’t base everything she did on how proud or disappointed her parents would be. The realization was scary, but kind of freeing. 

“So…” Miles cleared his throat. Frankie observed as he shifted the robo-baby to his other hip, noticing that he actually looked kind of natural holding it — a big improvement from when Miles had done this project last year and wanted nothing to do with his and Tristan’s fake baby. “I know you’re all tangled up in this mess with Dad, but I kinda need to talk to you about something.”

Frankie nodded reluctantly, knowing what was probably coming. “Lola?” she asked with a slight wince.

“Yeah... _that_ ,” Miles confirmed. He didn’t necessarily seem _angry_ , just sort of exhausted by everything. He glanced down at the robo-baby and sighed like his arms were finally getting tired. It was still so hard for Frankie to wrap her head around the idea of her brother holding _a real_ baby -- let alone _his own._ Only a couple of months away. Miles lowered his voice, “Look, I’m not gonna rat you out to Mom and Dad or anything. But Lola is _pissed,_ and I can’t blame her. I just wanna know _why_ you got behind the wheel. I mean, it’s not really your style. Or at least, I didn’t think it was.”

“I just...I wasn’t thinking,” Frankie sighed. That was the truth of it. “It’s not an excuse, I just...I dunno. I was caught up in everything with Esme and I didn’t think it was a big deal. You used to drive us to school like that all the time.”

“Yeah, and you remember what happened? I almost got a hit-and-run on my record. I could’ve seriously hurt Mike Dallas’s kid.” Miles seemed to pause and reflect. “You know, I never fully understood why Dallas was _so_ pissed until now. When I think about what could have happened to Lola and the baby…I was a _complete_ idiot back then. You’re not an idiot, Franks. I _know_ you’re not.”

 _Debatable,_ Frankie thought. She was starting to seriously feel that pang of guilt in her stomach again. “I’m not, I just- I did a _really_ stupid thing.” 

“Yeah, you did,” Miles didn’t hesitate to agree. “But you can make it up to her. If I’ve learned _anything_ from making a million mistakes, apologizing and making amends goes a long way.”

Frankie didn’t even know where to start when it came to making amends with Lola. She had already apologized several times, basically blowing up Lola’s phone with apology messages and gifs of cute puppies, which had all been left on read with no response. “I don’t know if apologizing is enough.” 

“It’s gonna take more than a couple of texts to fix this, Frankenstein,” Miles shook his head. The robo-baby in his arms let out a shrill cry, which caused Miles to groan. “I’m gonna take Lola’s robo-baby upstairs. Check on your own project, will ya? Hunter and I are exhausted after babysitting both of them all afternoon...you know, I’m just really glad Lola isn’t having twins.” 

Thank god _that_ gene wasn’t passed down, Frankie thought to herself. “I’ll be up in a minute,” she said to Miles. She leaned over the kitchen counter and let out a long, tired sigh. How was she going to fix everything?


	45. Chapter 45

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola and Saad receive their grade for the robo-baby project.

Lola stood examining her overgrown roots in the tiny mirror she had hung up in her locker, dreading going to Home Economics class. She had roughly five minutes before the bell rang and she was admittedly waiting until the last minute to enter the classroom, trying her best to avoid Frankie if she could.

It had been nine whole days since Lola found out the real reason behind Frankie crashing the car. Though she was definitely a little less _fired up_ about the whole situation at this point, she just still wasn’t quite ready to face Frankie and deal with all that yet. Lola had been avoiding her best friend’s texts and calls and dodging her in the hallways, hoping that a bit of distance would help her forgive and forget, but it hadn’t worked yet. 

Lola reluctantly closed her locker, turning away and joining the flow of students heading to their respective classrooms. She was sort of zoned out into her own little world until she heard a voice call her name from behind her. 

“ _L_ _ola!_ ” a slightly accented voice called out. “Wait up!”

Lola spun around quickly, her eyes immediately falling onto Saad, who was awkwardly holding onto their robo-baby in one hand and a grocery bag in another. For someone with so many younger siblings, he definitely didn’t look as natural or comfortable holding a baby as Miles did. “Hey, what’s up?” Lola greeted him as politely as possible.

“I got you something,” Saad said, holding up the grocery bag excitedly. “It’s nothing big, you’ve just been talking about craving these a lot and I figured you’d enjoy them…” 

“ _O-M-Jelly beans_!” Lola exclaimed excitedly as she examined the contents of the bag. Jelly beans of all types and flavors, and lots of strawberry, her favorite. “Thank you so much, Saad! You didn’t have to do this.” 

Saad shrugged, handing the bag over to Lola and readjusting his grip on the robo-baby. “You’ve been the only one here at Degrassi who’s made me feel welcome. It’s the least I can do.”

Lola hadn’t really done much, to be honest. Sure, she was kind to him and always used happy emojis when texting him, but she really hadn’t gone out of her way to welcome him -- she was just being herself. Lola and Saad had barely even talked about anything outside of the project. It made her sad to think that she had been the kindest person in the entire school to him without even trying.

Lola instinctively held her arms out for a hug, unable to avoid the instinct to want to comfort him. Saad awkwardly obliged and they embraced for a few seconds, Lola’s large belly taking up a ton of space between them. She was seven months along now, officially into her third trimester, and her belly was really getting in the way of _everything_. “Sorry, I don’t know if that was weird or not...” she admitted with a light giggle. 

“A little bit,” Saad offered Lola a friendly smile. “But I appreciate it.” 

The bell rang, cutting their conversation short. “Wanna walk with me to class?” Saad asked. 

“Sure!” Lola nodded, glad to acquire a new friend and to have someone to talk to in class _other_ than Frankie. Sure, she still had Shay, but she was so focused on Tiny and track nowadays that she’d hardly seemed to notice or care about the drama at all. If Lola was honest, she felt a bit lonely and pretty lost these days at Degrassi. 

Lola and Saad entered the classroom and rushed to their seats just in time, only seconds away from getting a tardy slip for being in the hallway after the bell had rang. Lola glanced at Frankie, trying but failing to avoid eye contact with her. Before Lola could think any further, Mr. Mitchell cleared his throat and positioned himself in front of the class, greeting them with his usual smile. 

“Today is the day, folks,” he started with an excited tone. “You are all officially _child-free_ again!” He looked around, seeming to notice that he was met with mostly confused faces. “You finally get to return your babies,” he explained. “And you’ll each receive your project grades as soon as each and every robo-baby is returned in working order.” 

Lola flinched as she felt the baby kick. Not _everyone_ was child-free again, she thought to herself as she observed her classmates’ giddy faces. She popped a strawberry jellybean in her mouth. At least she finally got to quit stressing about this assignment.

Mr. Mitchell grabbed a large tub from behind his desk to collect the dolls. “Come to the front of your class and return your babies, everybody. And because I actually have to say this, please _place_ the robo-babies, _don’t_ throw them. This is _not_ Physical Education and your projects are _not_ basketballs.”

Saad let out a small laugh, causing Lola to turn and smile. “Sorry, it’s kind of funny to imagine… _never mind_ ,” he cut himself off. For a second it seemed like Saad, who was usually the shy and mostly silent type, was opening up. 

“What’s funny to imagine?” Lola raised her brow.

“Someone…you know,” he hesitantly made the motion of someone shooting a basketball, then pointed to their robo-baby. “I don’t know if that’s offensive because, uh, you know…” he gestured towards Lola’s baby bump. 

Lola couldn’t help but laugh. “ _No,_ I’m not offended. I kinda wanna throw this thing across the room, especially after those early mornings and late nights of _endless_ crying. I feel like even a real baby can’t cry _that_ much. They need sleep eventually, right?”

“Honestly, with my siblings…they _did_ cry that much,” Saad said. “Abra, even more. She had something called, uh… _colic_ — _that’s_ when I learned about wearing ear plugs at night.” He grabbed the robo-baby and looked it over, trying to make sure they weren’t going to lose points for any superficial damage on the doll. He walked away from Lola, leaving her a little bit shaken. She didn’t understand how a real baby could possibly cry _more_ than that cursed doll had. She really, _really_ hoped her baby wouldn’t have colic...whatever that was. She made a mental note to Google it later.

Once everyone returned their dolls, Mr. Mitchell started handing grades back. He wasn’t the type to announce grades to everyone, but everyone’s body language gave it away almost immediately to Lola. She watched as the groups in the first two rows excitedly received their good grades — they were the ones who paid the most attention, after all. Shay and Tiny were among this category, of course. Lola observed as Tiny planted a light kiss on Shay’s cheek, both grinning obviously. They probably got an A. _Typical,_ Lola thought. Baaz on the other hand, was looking a little grumpy about the grade he and Vijay had received. Lola could hear Vijay already lecturing Baaz about all of the things he had done wrong. _Man,_ they were like a married couple — Lola couldn’t help but think of Bert and Ernie every time she saw the two of them bicker.

There were a few groups in this class that Lola wasn’t really familiar with. The one group she was _avoiding,_ though…they were next to receive their grade. Esme and _Frankie_. Lola tried to act like she wasn’t watching, but out of the corner of her eyes she saw a satisfied smirk on Esme’s face. Their grade must’ve been decent. _Surprising,_ considering Frankie and Esme had each respectively forgotten about their baby altogether _several_ times — not that Lola had handled this project perfectly...

Mr. Mitchell appeared in front of Lola and Saad. Lola was expecting a B+ at best, C at the worst. Hunter had done some hacky things to the baby that were supposed to wipe some of the long nights of crying and unchanged diapers from the hard drive or _whatever..._

“Lola and Saad, here you go,” Mr. Mitchell said with a blank expression, which immediately made Lola feel uneasy. Usually he was more of a _service with a smile_ type of guy… 

Lola looked down at their grade and immediately widened her eyes in disbelief. A _C-_?! She was literally _pregnant_ — how had she basically _failed_ this project? “There must be some mistake..!” she said to Mr. Mitchell frantically.

“I gave the two of you the grade you earned,” Mr. Mitchell said plainly. He paused and softened his expression a bit. “Look, don’t stress too much. There will be extra credit opportunities.” He shrugged and went back to handing out the other students’ grades.

Saad awkwardly patted Lola’s shoulder in an attempt to comfort her. “I’m sorry if I messed up my part…” he said. He gave her a weak smile, adding, “It’s just _one grade._ ”

 _Except it’s not,_ Lola thought to herself. She felt a dull ache in her stomach as the baby kicked again. If she could barely pass this fake baby project, how on earth was she supposed to handle a _real_ baby in just a couple of months? 

Lola decided she needed to do something to make herself feel more prepared _stat._ She fished into her pocket and pulled out her cell to text Miles, _‘Baby shopping after school? We’ve gotta get started on that nursery ASAP.’_ Lola figured she might as well focus on what she knew best: shopping. 


	46. Chapter 46

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frankie tries to make up with Lola, but Lola isn’t quite ready to forgive and forget.

The bell rang, but Frankie couldn’t get her eyes off of Lola. Their seats in Mr. Mitchell’s Home Economics class were too far from one another for Frankie to directly hear what grade Lola and Saad had gotten, but Lola did _not_ look happy. In fact, she kind of looked like she was ready to hurl. As far as Frankie knew, Lola was out of the morning sickness phase now that she was in her third trimester. Frankie couldn’t believe things had gotten this far. In a couple short months, this whole thing — her best friend having her brother’s baby...it was all finally coming to fruition. _Scary._

Lola was still sitting at her desk looking sort of spaced out, like she didn’t even register that the bell had rung. Frankie cautiously approached her. “Need some help?” she offered meekly, holding out her hand to help Lola up.

Lola hesitated for a second, then reluctantly nodded and grabbed Frankie’s hand. “Thanks,” she mumbled, groaning a little as she stood up. 

Frankie shrugged, _no biggie._ “Did you, uh...do okay on the project?” she asked awkwardly. She _hated_ that things were still so off with Lola. “I’m surprised Esme and I didn’t _totally_ fail. I thought for sure after I dropped it and left it in the Uber...” Frankie rambled.

“If it weren’t for that night in the ravine…I kept _my_ baby safe…” Lola was in defensive mode. Clearly _something_ was wrong. 

Frankie was careful not to say anything that would make Lola even more upset. She was well aware that she was on pretty thin ice with Lola. All it took was one wrong move and that ice would completely shatter. Rather than focusing on trying to get Lola to forgive her, Frankie decided to try and focus on helping Lola make it through whatever was going on.

Being selfless was honestly pretty new to Frankie. She thought in the situation she was in, selfless was one of the better things she could try to be, especially considering the way everything around her had been slowly shifting and changing as the months passed. Frankie knew that things would begin to really get _real_ soon. Everything — literally _everything_ — was going to change. 

“Did Mr. Mitchell say anything about why he gave you a…” Frankie paused and glanced at the project papers that Lola had flipped upside down, hiding whatever mark she had gotten. Could it really be _that_ bad? “Esme was kind of pissed that we got a B-. She’s worried it’ll mess up her GPA. I reminded her that nearly every other grade in this class is a worksheet literally copied from the textbook. This was pretty much the only project with _stakes_.” 

“Yeah…not as high stakes as…” Lola paused, swallowing a lump in her throat before her hands moved to her stomach. “The baby has been kicking _so hard_ today, right at my ribs...” 

“A tap dancer just like their aunt,” Frankie teased, eyeing Lola, who was almost completely outsized by her baby bump at this point. It was crazy that the baby still had two more months to grow before it actually arrived. 

Lola’s eyes locked with Frankie’s for half a second before she looked away again, tossing her various colored pens into her panda pencil case, throwing the case into her plaid backpack, which was covered with several cute pins featuring various shades of Hello Kitty. Lola never hesitated to express herself in any way that she could. “Didn’t you only do tap dancing until you were like, eight?” Lola wasn’t in a good mood, but Frankie was glad she was still at least _engaging_. That was more than Frankie could say for the past nine painstaking days. 

“Yeah, and I was never really any good. But, uh...” Frankie paused, her brain struggling, trying to grasp onto any way she could continue the conversation before she lost Lola’s attention and interest. “Remember when your baby was just the size of a little sea monkey?” Frankie tried to get Lola to smile. 

She still felt like she was very delicately tap-dancing around eggshells — and as she had just recalled, she was never a superstar when it came to that, both literally and metaphorically. The last thing Frankie wanted to do as make things _worse_ by doing or saying something stupid. Messing things up, even when it started with good intentions, was _unfortunately_ a Hollingsworth specialty trait, carried down from generations. 

Lola just groaned in response, still rubbing the bottom of her stomach. Frankie didn’t know much about pregnancy, but the baby looked like it was carrying _low_. Her mother had told her about some old wives’ tale about how the way a woman’s body carried the baby indicated the sex. Frankie was pretty sure that wasn’t _science_ , though.

“I _wish_ the baby still just felt like a little sea monkey fluttering around in my stomach,” Lola huffed as she finished gathering her things. “Back when I wasn’t _huge_ and getting _kicked in the ribs_ every three minutes...”

“Do you want me to carry your backpack?” Frankie offered, honestly not knowing what else to do. It was at least a better strategy than begging for forgiveness _again._ There were only so many more ways she could say sorry without resorting to a full-on spa weekend or expensive gift basket. 

Lola shrugged, leaning up against the table to relieve some pressure. “Sure,” she said reluctantly. “I have to meet Miles outside, though. We’re going…um, _shopping_ at the mall...” 

It seemed like Lola was hesitant to share specific information with Frankie, which honestly hurt. Miles had mentioned to Frankie earlier that their mother had been pushing Lola and him to go buy things for the nursery and had even generously funded the trip…was their conflict really so serious that Lola didn’t want to share that with her best friend? It was _Lola Pacini_ and a freaking _shopping spree,_ after all. Shopping was quite literally Lola’s superpower _and_ her favorite after school activity _._ Something like this would usually elicit a squeal, happy dance, or some other very visibly excited reaction from one or both of the teens. Right now though, Lola just looked sort of emotionless and tired. 

Most of the students in the hallway had cleared out by this point. There were just a few stray kids digging through their lockers and teachers locking classroom doors, heading out with their car keys in hand, elated for the end of the school day to keep Lola and Frankie company as they walked together. 

Frankie paused as the girls got closer to the school’s front entrance. For a moment, Lola continued to walk before noticing that Frankie had lagged behind. “I promised Miles I’d meet him by the steps…” Lola said, avoiding eye contact with Frankie. She tried to cross her arms, but they just awkwardly sat on top of her bump, closer to her chest. “I appreciate you carrying my books, but it doesn’t mean we’re...” 

“I know,” Frankie said, resisting the urge to sigh, not wanting to come off like she was trying to guilt Lola into forgiving her. “I don’t expect you to wanna talk to me or forgive me. I mean, I _want_ you to, but…I just wanna make sure you’re okay. I’ve been a _crap_ friend lately…” 

“You’re not wrong,” Lola shot back, her features overtaken with an overwhelming _pout._ They stood in the middle of the hallway in silence for a moment, Frankie still not able to quite catch Lola’s eyes. “And like…” Lola continued, her tone a bit calmer this time, “I wanna forgive you, Franks, but…” Lola’s body language was slightly more relaxed now, but her hand was still traveling around her stomach in circles repeatedly. She seemed to be trying to provide some sort of relief from the sheer size and weight of her baby bump. Lola was tiny to begin with, but now her bump had completely commandeered her torso. The extra weight and width coupled with the painful and unpleasant body changes that pregnancy caused…Frankie honestly probably would’ve called out sick for a self-proclaimed permanent bed rest _weeks_ ago. 

“Look…” Lola broke the silence after a brief pause, which they both seemed to easily occupy with their respective racing, confusing thoughts. “Literally _everything_ is stressing me out right now. I feel like one of those science projects where they pour like, baking soda or whatever into the…you know, the lava thing…?” 

“A _volcano_?” Frankie chimed in, and Lola nodded to confirm. “You feel like everything is gonna explode and make a huge mess? Why?”

“It’s just a lot, and…” Lola trailed off, decidedly not quite ready to open up more. 

“You know I’m always here if you need me, Lo, just…please talk to me or Miles or _someone_ if you’re really feeling stressed out. Whether it’s baby stuff, someone talking crap about you at school…a bad grade…” Frankie tenderly touched on the original subject at hand, not wanting to set Lola off again. “You have tons of people who care about you and the baby. Just don’t forget that.” 

“Thanks again for carrying my bag,” Lola said. “And offering to listen to my baggage.” Lola allowed the corners of her lips to curl up into a slight smile, reaching her arms out to take her bag back from Frankie. She gripped her pink backpack and struggled a bit to get her arms in the straps correctly. “Franks, I love you. You know that. Honestly, I just need some time.” 

The girls finally exchanged a real, meaningful glance. Their faces were serious for a moment before Lola broke the silence with a joke. “Speaking of _time…_ maybe it’s time I change to like, a fashionable messenger bag, if such a thing even exists…this backpack legit makes me feel like I’m two seconds from flipping over on my back like a turtle shell. I honestly don’t think I could get back up if that happened.”

Frankie threw out a half-joking suggestion, “What if you got like, a _rolling backpack?_ _”_

Lola threw her hands up, giving in to a giggle. “Screw it, everyone is already staring at the tiny, waddling, blue-haired pregnant girl...might as well throw in a rolling backpack to make me into a _complete_ freakshow.” 

Frankie smiled, glad to really _talk_ to Lola for the first time in over a week. Even if everything wasn’t fixed between them yet, she felt hope blooming. “I know money doesn’t buy happiness, but a shopping trip usually helps me when I’m not feeling my best...” Frankie said, thinking for only a moment before reaching into her purse and fishing out her debit card, offering it to Lola. 

Lola raised her brow, seemingly caught off guard. “You don’t have to…”

“Don’t go crazy.Just...make sure you get little baby Hollingsworth something nice from Aunt Frankie.” 

Lola nodded. “And myself?” she added, finally reaching for the card with a small, teasing smile. 

“Just don’t max it out,” Frankie handed the card to Lola with a slight wince. She _really_ hoped she wouldn’t regret this. 


	47. Chapter 47

Lola was definitely in need of some retail therapy after what felt like the longest school day ever paired with her unexpected conversation with Frankie. Things with Frankie hadn’t gone _badly,_ they just weren’t _solved_. It wasn’t that Lola didn’t want to move forward, there was just something lingering — a weird _something_ that was stopping her from fully moving on. 

Above everything, Lola was just plain _overwhelmed._ She wished she could just turn off her brain and shut off the messy hormones and feelings that were clouding everything and making it impossible for her to feel comfortable, content, and, most importantly: _ready_. 

Lola stood on the front steps of Degrassi and waited for Miles to drive his car around and pick her up. They had agreed to check out a local baby store after school that had gotten pretty good reviews. It was honestly a place much more expensive than anything Lola would’ve chosen. She was always much more of a thrift shop girl growing up. Her family would buy her a fancy dress from a department store when there was something like a big family event or a wedding, but the majority of her outfits growing up were either hand-me-downs or thrift store finds. She was _definitely_ new to the idea of baby clothes costing as much as or even more than adult clothes. She couldn’t quite wrap her head around that idea. Baby clothes required so much less fabric — there was literally no reason for them to cost _more,_ Lola thought. 

As Lola watched Miles pull up to the curb and put his car in park, she wondered for a moment if the grand reconnection that her parents were thrusting upon her would result in anything beneficial, like maybe her mother finally teaching her how to sew. She’d tried when she was little, but she always pricked her fingers with the pins. Lola was trying her best to be open to the idea of her mother coming back, but just like with Frankie, there were some things only time could fix. 

Miles stepped out so he could help Lola load herself and her things into the car. He opened the passenger door, holding a hand out to help her place herself in the passenger’s seat. 

“Thanks, boo,” Lola said, stepping up to his car and twisting her body to get in. “I swear, _everything_ hurts...” Truthfully, Lola wasn’t any more sore than the usual dull aches she had mostly grown used to. She was just feeling extra grumpy about the overwhelming amount of crap on her plate. “I feel like I’ve been pregnant for a billion years,” she added with a puppy dog pout, trying not to groan as her sore body hit the stiff leather seats of the car’s interior. Why were expensive cars _never_ comfy?

Lola secretly wished sometimes that Miles drove a minivan like the one her parents had when she was growing up. She wondered if he would ever trade in his fancy cool car for something more _family friendly…_ or maybe after Lola got a chance to take her driver’s test, she could get a comfy, baby-friendly car of her own — hopefully in _pink._

“Feels that way sometimes,” Miles chuckled as he turned the keys in the ignition, sounding pretty tired himself. 

Lola rolled her eyes slightly. “Trust me, you have _no idea_ ,” she said. “I’ve literally got this little human kicking me all day and night. Like, I couldn’t even get past question three on Armstrong’s pop quiz this morning because _your_ kid decided it was time for a _dance party._ ”

“Oh, so they’re _my_ kid when they’re acting up,” Miles shook his head laughing. “Figures...” He stopped at a red light and glanced over at Lola. “Speaking of...have you, uh, talked to Frankie?”

Lola felt her heartburn increase just thinking about it. “A little bit. She helped me carry my stuff after class...” Lola stalled for a minute. “She was nice and everything, but I just don’t think I’m ready for us to be _normal_ again. At least not yet.” 

Miles nodded with a simple _"M_ _mhm,"_ as he pulled away from Degrassi and headed toward the mall, which was only a few blocks away. 

“I’m not trying to freeze her out forever, but…I’m literally making a _baby_ right now. I don’t really have the energy to deal with any more stress,” Lola mustered up an explanation that came out sounding more like an excuse. She missed Frankie a ton, and part of her wanted to just make up already, but…that feeling that Lola couldn’t quite place...it was still just... _l_ _ingering_. 

There was just _so_ much going through her brain right now — Lola wasn’t kidding when she said she felt like a volcano making a huge mess of things. She couldn’t even muster up the nerve to tell Miles about her robo-baby grade, and she normally told him _everything_. The last thing she wanted to do was stress him out with even _more_ evidence that they were completely unprepared for this baby.

Miles furrowed his brow, not satisfied. He could always seem to tell when Lola was shutting him out. “I just don’t like seeing you guys fight like this. Especially right now.”

“She gave me some kind words,” Lola sighed. “And, uh, her debit card...” She held up the card and shrugged. She wasn’t totally comfortable accepting Frankie’s money like this, but at the same time, she couldn’t really pass up the opportunity to buy at least one overpriced itty bitty baby outfit without guilt. “Look, I’ll make up with everybody and do everything I gotta do when I’m less grumpy. Right now I feel like _Lola and the No Good, Very Bad Day._ ”

That made Miles laugh a bit. “You know what might cheer you up…?” he started, cracking a smile. “You feeling up to the _usual?"_

Lola’s face suddenly lit up. “Pet shop, then baby stuff. Yes!” she responded with a much more perky tone, like a vial of sunshine had just been injected into her veins. 

The few times that they had gone out to the mall, Lola dragged Miles to the pet store to visit the animals and buy a gift for Fernando first. It was practically tradition. Miles really _did_ know the best way to cheer Lola up. 

Miles parked and helped Lola out of the car, holding her hand as she headed toward the pet shop, more energized by her excitement than he had seen her all day. “I hope they have geckos and iguanas, and…ooh, hamsters!” she squealed, leading him toward the store instinctively. 

“Have you ever had a hamster?” Miles asked, following his girlfriend with a smile on his face. “Frankie and Hunter got hamsters back when they were like, seven. It did _not_ end well…” 

Lola looked back, showing off a shocked expression. “Wait, no way! I haven’t told you about my hamster?” She walked in front of Miles, holding his hand and struggling to squeeze her stomach through the tight aisles of the mall pet shop. “She was one of my favorite pets ever! She was like a little grey puffball and her name was Ham-Ham. I got her for my eighth birthday. She was _so_ spoiled…” Lola paused and reached up to wipe a lone tear from her eye, suddenly overcome with nostalgia. “I will _never_ get used to the mood swings these stupid hormones bring...”

Miles’ eyes fell on a pair of small white mice and he suddenly looked slightly horrified. “I feel like Hunter and Yael would be totally into these. Creepy…” 

“I could totally see them doing like, experiments and teaching them tricks…” Lola imagined Hunter and Yael doing elaborate scientific, techy things with the little white mice and recording it all for their vlog channel — all cruelty-free, of course. Lola would make sure of it _._ “Okay so, I have a question...” she started, then paused for a second, worried she was going to sound stupid. 

Miles, seeming to notice Lola’s pause and restraint, reached over and squeezed her hand, silently urging her to continue her thought. 

Lola remembered in that moment, as her eyes caught his, that Miles had _never_ made her feel stupid — not even once. Unlike the people who had picked on her for the way she spoke or the fact that she wasn’t exactly an A+ student, Miles had never treated her like anything less than perfect, which Lola appreciated more than she could put into words. So instead, she just leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. “You’re the best,” she grinned. “So, my question…how do they test makeup on animals? I always imagined them putting blush on like, a mouse’s little cheeks, and I…” Lola started to crack up laughing thinking about how ridiculous the idea was, “I _know_ that’s not how it happens, but I’m actually curious…” 

“I have no idea, honestly,” Miles replied, eyeing a tiny Russian hamster and fawning over its chubby hamster cheeks. “Would you get insulted if I said this hamster’s little cheeks remind me of yours?” He reached over and placed a soft hand on Lola’s cheeks. 

“I _do_ resemble this guy a little,” Lola said, feeling a light blush fall on her admittedly chubbier cheeks. She had _definitely_ not hesitated to snack on whatever she was craving during her pregnancy. She figured this was pretty much her only chance to eat all the ice cream she wanted, basically guilt-free, so she might as well take advantage. “What if we got a hamster?” Lola proposed, pointing her finger at the tiny animal that had taken to running full-speed on their wheel. “I mean, this one is really calling my name…”

Miles laughed. “You do this _every_ time. We come in here, you fall in love with a hamster or a bird or a kitten and I have to practically peel you away from the pet shop.” 

“At least we have a healthy routine!” Lola teased, her eyes not leaving the hamster that she had slightly fallen in love with. 

“In a couple months, we’ll have something just a _little_ bit bigger that’ll require ten times the work that this little guy needs for at least 18 years,” Miles bent down and crossed his finger with Lola’s, causing her to break her stare and look at Miles and smile. “I promise, it’ll be worth the wait.” 

“I know it will,” Lola responded, kissing Miles on the lips again. “And I know our kid will be even cuter than these guys, if that’s even possible,” she added before kissing her boyfriend on the nose. “I love you.” 

“I love you too,” Miles pulled Lola past the small animal displays and led her toward the fish tanks. “Now, let’s finish our lap around the pet store. We don’t wanna keep Shay waiting, do we?” 

...

Lola exited the pet shop with one hand tightly gripping Miles’ hand and the other holding a small bag. “Fernando is going to _love_ his new collar!” she spoke excitedly. “I couldn’t help myself. Pink is...”

“His favorite color, I know,” Miles finished Lola’s sentence with a goofy smile, grabbing the bag from Lola’s hand and shoving it into the pocket of his pleated slate grey pants. “Fernando _does_ look good in pink. Maybe I could help you dye his fur sometime soon.”

“Please?!” Lola jumped at the idea. She usually dyed Fernando’s fur pink with a dog-safe dye every few months, but that had become a task that had fallen to the wayside when she got pregnant. “It’s pretty hard to help your dog look fabulous when you can’t even bend over to bathe him.”

“Let’s try to focus on finding a crib for the nursery first. _Then_ we can talk about booking a doggy salon date,” Miles said in a teasing tone. 

“Deal,” Lola stuck her tongue out playfully. “Shay should be here any minute…” she said, observing the nearly empty mall surrounding her. “Are we looking for the nursery at your place or mine?”

Miles seemed caught off guard by the question. “Your place or- wait… _two_ nurseries…crap, I keep forgetting..” He began rubbing his forehead the way he always did when he was stressed.

“Double the money, I know…” Lola sighed, placing a hand over her bump. “How can a person so small cost _so_ much?”

Lola was seriously grateful they didn’t have to stress too much over finances given the Hollingsworths’ financial status. She still had never had anything close to this level of responsibility when it came to money before. Lola wasn’t totally comfy just accepting money from Mrs. Hollingsworth like this, but what else could they do? Lola’s father wasn’t exactly swimming in cash, and her tips from her shifts at the Cantina definitely weren’t going to cover the bills _and_ the millions of things that the baby was going to need. 

“It’s not just that,” Miles said. “It’s just...I _really_ hate the idea of us shifting our kid between two houses. I hate the thought of not being there while they’re crying at night or…” He let out a large sigh, like the complicated reality of being _teenage parents_ was starting to hit him all over again.

“I don’t like it either,” Lola admitted, tearing her eyes away from a mean lady who was giving her a disapproving glare. The thought of handling their crying baby in the middle of the night without Miles by her side was _more_ than a little terrifying, and Lola honestly still had zero clue how exactly they were going to handle all of these arrangements. “But there’s no way my dad will just let us shack up. Until I’m 18, what choice do we have?”

“No choice right now,” Miles seemed exasperated. “Maybe we’ll just have to become masters of FaceTime — you know, to keep one another sane during the long nights.”

“There’s _no way_ I’m forcing you to be up staring at a screen all night. I just wish we could be physically together at night…all night,” Lola pushed her body closer to Miles’, allowing him to wrap his arms around her. “We’ll find a way. Maybe one day we’ll…” she started, then decided to pause. “Never mind.” The only way she could see her dad allowing them to live together would be if they were intending to get _married_ , but the thought of marriage at their age and the stage of their relationship seemed way too intense to share, even if their circumstances were anything but normal for a high school relationship. Sometimes Lola caught her mind wandering off into a _One Tree Hill_ fantasy, but then the reality of still being sixteen hit.

Before their conversation could continue, Shay arrived...hand in hand with Tiny. 

“Guess we have a special guest,” Miles said under his breath, sounding thrown off and a little anxious. “He better not punch me this time.”

Lola sighed. Things had been better since the whole Cantina mess, but Tiny and Miles hadn’t exactly officially made up, nor had they ever really gotten along in the first place. She honestly wished that Shay had just shown up alone. Even though Lola and Tiny were friends by now, going on a double date baby clothes shopping spree with her boyfriend, ex-boyfriend, and best friend was just _way_ too weird. “Shush. Be _nice,_ ” she lightly elbowed Miles in the ribs as Shay and Tiny neared. Lola put on the best smile she could manage to greet them with, “Hey, guys…”

“I hope it’s okay Tiny joins us,” Shay said, as if any of them had any choice in the matter _now._ “We’ve barely spent any time together this week and...I thought a double date would be more fun than me third wheeling?” 

“Of course — the more the merrier!” Lola said decisively, setting a positive mood even though she definitely didn’t feel too sure about this. Judging by both Tiny and Miles’ expressions, neither did they. “Uh, up for hitting up the clothes section first? I’m a sucker for onesies and we’re on the hunt for _gender neutral_.”


	48. Chapter 48

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola, Miles, Shay, and Tiny go shopping. Lola and Tiny talk about the past.

Lola and Shay had been rummaging through the clearance rack for about ten minutes now. The boys were just sort of wordlessly making their way down aisles nearby, barely making any effort to acknowledge each other. So much for a double date _._

Lola held up a little red polka dot onesie to Shay. “Look at how _tiny_ the sleeves are,” Lola cried, fawning over the sheer small size. “This looks like it could fit a teddy bear…if baby clothes are _this_ little, why do I need to get completely ginormous?”

“I’m pretty sure that’s not _all_ baby,” Shay gestured to Lola’s bump and surrounding weight gain. “There’s like, water weight, the placenta...the three bags of Ketchup chips you ate today…” She cracked a smile.

Lola rolled her eyes. “Oh, hush. What even _is_ a placenta anyway?” She thought about the question Miles had asked a while back. 

“Don’t you have doctors and like, a million baby books to answer that question?” Shay pulled up a tiny purple mesh tank that said ‘2 CUTE’ in the style of a jersey on the back. “What about this one?”

“Not exactly my style,” Lola turned the shirt suggestion down, still searching through the racks for something that would really catch her eye. “I wonder what my baby’s style will be…”

Shay shrugged. “Until they’re old enough to dress themselves, whatever you put them in, I guess.” 

After not seeing anything of note in the clearance section, Lola dared to cross over into a section that had no marked sales, but way cuter clothes. Her fingers reached out for a plain plum onesie and she instinctively checked the price tag. “ _Woah,_ ” Lola said aloud, attracting Shay’s attention without realizing it. “This side of the store is like, _three times_ as pricey.” 

“Well of course, darling, it’s _designer_ ,” Shay did a bad rich person accent as she floated over. “More expensive, less inviting...” 

Shay kind of had a point. The clearance section had _far_ more diverse options than the high-price side. Lola was just so not used to intentionally spending _more_ money. It was like shopping online and clicking the ‘higher to lower’ price option instead of the reverse, which was much more Lola’s style. 

“This is probably what Mrs. H is expecting you to come back with,” Shay held up a boring grey onesie with a tiny stitched bee across the neckline. “$65. These prices are _nothing_ to the _elite.”_ Shay turned her nose up as she placed the inside back, pretending she was an heiress or some rich person who could actually afford the designer baby clothes. 

“Sometimes I forget Frankie can technically afford this stuff,” Lola said, her fingers lightly grazing the different shades of mute onesie that weren’t really catching her eye. “She’s not as much like, _obnoxious rich girl_ anymore.”

Shay nodded, slowly migrating back toward the clearance racks and Tiny and Miles. “Same with Miles. He used to feel the need to flex his riches all the time. That was initially why Zoe was all over him.” 

Lola gasped and laughed. “Oh, to go back to Grade 9 when Zoe was all over Miles and we were all over Zoe… _why_ did we idolize her? She was such a manipulative…”

“ _Witch_ , I know!” Shay finished Lola’s sentence, not quite using the word Lola would have. “I can’t believe she had us under her _spell_. Her West Drive clout has all but disappeared these days...”

“I _forgot_ about that show!” Lola had admittedly fallen off when it came to her favorite teen dramas. She had _enough_ teen drama below her nose. “Zoe did some nasty things, but…she was going through her own thing,” Lola felt the need to defend Zoe slightly. Despite the fact that the two of them had never become BFFs, she knew she probably wouldn’t be clothes shopping with Miles right now if Zoe hadn’t convinced her to give him another chance. 

Shay shrugged in agreement. “I guess if Zoe and Miles can get through _their_ rough patches, anyone can, right?” Shay posed a seemingly innocent question, though Lola guessed she probably wasn’t just talking about Zoe anymore. Lola was suddenly reminded of why she’d needed this shopping spree in the first place.

“I dunno…” Lola felt a hard lump in her throat and shifted back to rummaging through the outrageously expensive onesies. “I guess so. I mean...I _hope_ so.”

Shay looked to their boyfriends, who reluctantly stood near one another at a shoe display, awkwardly eyeing the same ten pairs of shoes they’d already looked at. They both looked terrified to move from the five foot radius around the display that Shay and Lola had left them next to. 

“Why are boys so weird when it comes to baby stuff?” Lola giggled, picking up a tiny fuzzy hoodie and picking it up to inspect it. “OMG, Shay…” she held the hoodie up and flipped up the hood, revealing the cutest little plush goat hood. She looked at the price — _ridiculous_ , but it was the perfect gift to buy with Frankie’s card. 

“What’d you find?” Miles approached, clearing his throat. “Tiny and I looked at the shoes…a few times…nothing really _gender neutral_ in the newborn section. I don’t really think a newborn really _needs_ shoes anyway...” 

Tiny wandered over and spoke up. “I told Miles it’s for the _pictures_ , not practicality. I knew you’d probably want to do a Hastygram photoshoot and there were these ballet flats…” 

“But we don’t _know_ if we’re having a girl or not, so we can’t get _ballet flats_ …” Miles responded. “We’re waiting to find out when she- I mean, _they’re_ born...”

“Ballet flats are gender neutral,” Tiny had to argue a little. “Pretty sure Zig had a pair of pretty pink ones for his dance time with Esme...wait, sorry, is Esme a sore subject?” 

Miles sighed. “Nope. Even if she were, my sister is dating her, so…”

“Miles _knows?”_ Shay cut in, trying to mouth to Lola under her breath, but failing to be remotely subtle.

“ _Esme_ and _Frankie?_ ” Tiny’s jaw dropped. “Zig owes me fifty bucks. I told him they were making eyes at each other but he thought there was no way Esme could get over him so fast. He thinks it’s all just a ploy to get him back...”

“They seem happy,” Lola blurted out. She wasn’t sure why she felt the need to stand up for Frankie and Esme exactly, but she knew she _definitely_ didn’t want to hear anymore about Zig or any other possibly drama-inciting topics. She wrapped her arms around Miles’ lanky frame, nuzzling her head into his armpit, which weirdly smelled good. “Look, let’s just find a few more cute pieces of baby clothes and then we can grab a cart and start looking at the furniture. And then maybe we can get pretzels...the salty _and_ the sweet ones.”

…

“Should we get two of the same crib, or...?” Lola asked aloud to Miles, Tiny, and Shay, looking for any semblance of advice but finding nothing but blank teenage faces. “Do you think the baby will notice the difference between the crib at my house and the crib at yours…?”

“I wish we had just _one_ place…” Miles said as his fingers toyed with one of the wooden crib’s frames. 

There seemed to be a few good choices when it came to cribs, though Lola had _no idea_ what she was looking for when it came to finding the perfect crib. “I know,” she sighed. “But I think I like this one?” She settled on a nice classic cherry wood crib. 

“I definitely like this color,” Shay stepped up, supporting Lola’s choice. “I say don’t complicate things. Get two of this one.”

“I’m with Shay,” Tiny said, sounding impatient. Lola guessed it was probably less about Tiny loving this particular crib style and more about him just wanting to be done looking at baby stuff already. Even though the trip was going way better than Lola thought, it was still _weird._

Miles didn’t seem so sure, standing next to an aged-looking white crib with hearts carved into the headboard. “This one has a matching dresser…” He seemed interested in the crib, but hesitant to campaign against the majority. “What do you think of this one, Lo?” 

Lola walked over, standing next to her boyfriend. “This one is nice too…” she complimented the crib, though the cherry wood one was definitely calling her name. “Maybe this one at your house, the other at mine?”

“You don’t mind if they don’t match?” Miles asked. 

“They’ll never be in the same room anyway,” Lola shrugged. “Plus, I already have an old dresser that kinda matches the darker one, so-” 

Lola froze, suddenly feeling a sharp, tight spasm in her stomach. It didn’t feel like a kick or a hiccup per say, it was just a _jarring_ tightness in her abdomen. “ _Whoa…_ ” she clutched her stomach just as the feeling subsided.

Miles immediately reached over for Lola’s hand, looking instinctively worried. _“What is it?”_ Miles asked urgently, protective as ever. Tiny raised his brow, looking a bit concerned — or maybe freaked out — while Shay seemed to be lost in her own little world.

“Nothing, it was just- weird feeling…” Lola said, unable to quite put it into words. There were so many aspects of pregnancy that were just so _weird_ to get used to still. She made a mental note to Google the feeling when she got the chance. Her search history was _full_ of random questions about what was going on inside her body. “I’m fine,” she reassured Miles. “Just a little tired. I think maybe I should sit down...can you check out and we’ll meet you at the food court?” She reached into the pockets of her maternity leggings for Frankie’s credit card and handed it to Miles, along with the cute fuzzy goat hoodie she’d picked out earlier.

“Sure…” Miles said, still seeming worried. He turned back towards the cherry crib again and sighed, “Are you _sure_ you want two different colors?”

“I know that if I don’t get a pretzel in the next few minutes, I’ll turn into a hormonal hurricane,” Lola replied half-teasingly. She really _did_ need to sit down and rest for a minute — the wedges she’d chosen to wear had turned out to be a terrible choice for her poor swollen feet.

“Alright, fine — I’ll meet you at the food court in fifteen,” Miles muttered. Lola couldn’t help but notice he still sounded a bit _off._ He glanced at the long line by the register and added with a sigh, “More like twenty minutes…”

Lola stood on her tippy toes to plant a kiss on her boyfriend’s cheek. “You’re the best,” she smiled. She turned to Shay and Tiny and plopped herself in between them, linking arms with them both, “ _Vamanos!_ Pretzels await!” 

....

Lola, Shay, and Tiny arrived at the mall’s food court just moments before Lola felt like her legs, which now felt like jello, were about to give out. Any more walking and Lola was moments away from asking for a piggy-back ride from Tiny, like they used to when they were still together. She figured Shay wouldn’t be quite comfortable with that, so she was pretty relieved that they had finally arrived. 

“I _need_ to sit down,” Lola said as she approached a small circular table with only two chairs. “Are there any booths available? That’d be _way_ more comfy.” She looked around the slightly crowded food court for a different table, but all of the bigger tables had been taken.

“Just sit here for now and Tiny and I will go grab the pretzels. We’ll scope out a better table when we get back. Someone’s _bound_ to move by the time our food is ready…” Shay replied, pointing to the long, growing line at the pretzel stand. 

Tiny stepped up and pulled a chair out for Lola. She noticed Shay wincing slightly — she really hoped that nothing she was doing was unintentionally making Shay upset or jealous. Drama was the _last_ thing she wanted or needed right now.

Lola placed herself in the uncomfortable metal chair, scooching it back a few more inches from the table to make room for her baby bump. First the uncomfortable, tight desks at Degrassi, and now this... “Wait! You guys are leaving me _alone_?” she asked with a slight pout. 

“It won’t be more than ten minutes, Lo,” Shay said, sounding impatient. “Miles is probably checking out and heading this way any second.”

“He has to get someone from the store to help him put the crib boxes in the car first,” Lola reminded Shay. “I just don’t wanna sit here looking pregnant, pathetic, and alone…” 

“You don’t look pathetic,” Tiny said. “And you can barely even tell you’re pregnant.”

Lola rolled her eyes. “That’s a lie if I’ve ever heard one…” She gestured down to her sizable belly. “Look, can one of you _please_ just sit with me so I don’t look like a pregnant loser?”

“We’ll be right back, I promise,” Shay responded, grabbing Tiny’s hand and pulling him toward the pretzel stand.

“I don’t mind, Shay…” Tiny spoke up, breaking away from Shay and grabbing the other chair. 

Shay seemed reluctant to leave Tiny and Lola alone, but didn’t argue further. “Fine…what does everybody want?” 

“Pizza pretzel, please! With extra cheese sauce!” Lola’s mood brightened when she remembered that she was about to fulfill her craving. “And a pack of those little cinnamon pretzel sticks, ooh! I can never resist those!” 

“I’ll just steal a few of the cinnamon pretzel sticks,” Tiny said, placing a kiss on Shay’s forehead before sitting down across from Lola at the tiny two-person table. “Plus, we can scope out a new spot to sit while you’re in line.”

Lola cut in, partially serious but also partially hoping to ease a bit of the awkwardness. “ _Over my dead body_ am I sharing my cinnamon pretzel sticks with you,” she teased Tiny. ”You always say you’ll just eat _just a few_ and then you eat the whole thing!” Lola grinned, remembering their mall food court dates fondly for a moment before glancing over to Shay, who still looked slightly rigid and unsure. 

“So…one order of cinnamon pretzel sticks or two?” Shay asked with an eyebrow raised. 

“Definitely two. And please, please don’t forget my extra cheese sauce, _please!_ ” Lola answered as sweetly as she could, offering her debit card and flashing Shay a quick glance, mouthing the words ‘are you okay?’ to ensure she wasn’t crossing some major boundaries by spending a few minutes alone with Tiny. After the whole _‘seven minutes in heaven’_ debacle months ago and considering all of the growth that she and Shay had made as friends since then, the last thing Lola wanted to do was cause any sort of relationship drama between Shay and Tiny. 

Shay nodded lightly, eyeing Tiny and Lola with a slightly unsure glance before taking the debit card and heading toward the pretzel stand.

Tiny and Lola sat at the table alone in silence for a moment. Tiny’s eyes were glued to his shoes while Lola’s eyes fixated on a couple with a small baby. Any time she saw babies in public now, she couldn’t help but try to imagine herself and Miles with their own baby a few months down the road. No matter how many times she thought about it, it still seemed so unreal that they were actually going to be _parents_ soon. 

Tiny broke the silence after about a minute. “Do you think Shay seems…weird?” 

“Shay’s always weird,” Lola responded with a shrug, contemplating pretending like she didn’t notice the shift in Shay’s tone and demeanor. Before she could stop herself, though, she continued, “I hope she’s not like…worried or jealous or anything. _Clearly_ there’s nothing to be jealous about.” She motioned down to her belly, which somehow looked and felt bigger every single day. 

“I’m pretty sure she knows you’re not gonna try to steal me away or anything,” Tiny said. “But I think the whole _you and me being exes_ thing is just…weird for her sometimes.”

“It’s weird for me too,” Lola admitted. “It’s gotten less weird over time, especially since I got with Miles, but…I guess it _is_ kinda weird that we’re still in one another’s circle. Even though it feels like we dated _a million years_ ago…”

Tiny laughed. “Has it been that long already?” 

“Something like that,” Lola smiled, smoothing her hand across her sizable baby bump as confirmation of just how much time had passed. “Is it weird for you to see me like... _this?”_

Tiny shrugged. “At first, yeah...you and Miles having a kid wasn’t exactly something I’d have predicted. Then again, I wouldn’t have predicted Frankie and Esme dating either...” He paused for a second, then cleared his throat. “Listen, I’m really sorry for causing trouble at the Cantina a few months ago. I was out of line coming at Miles like that.”

“You’re not wrong,” Lola sighed, remembering the chaos and drama that occurred back when her pregnancy was still just a rumor. She did _not_ miss keeping such a huge secret -- not that she had much of a _choice_ in the matter now. “I forgive you,” she finally said. “I can’t speak for Miles, but I’m sure he’d appreciate an apology too, when he finally arrives.”

“Yeah...” Tiny winced, scratching the back of his head. “It wasn’t exactly my finest moment. Haven’t caused _that_ much of a mess since the barbecue chip incident.”

Lola thought back fondly to the memory of their snack parties, letting her expression soften. Life was so much less _complicated_ then. She nodded in agreement before speaking again, “You know you owe someone else an apology too.” 

“Who?” Tiny asked, raising an eyebrow. 

“ _Lautaro!_ He _still_ gets on me for being the reason the Cantina has _three_ bad Yelp reviews from that day. He keeps saying I’m giving the joint a _bad reputation._ Or maybe that’s just him shading me for getting knocked up…”

Tiny laughed a little. “If I’m allowed back in the Cantina, I’ll apologize to Lautaro with _roses_. I honestly haven’t been back since the fight…Zig and I were kind of afraid we were banned.”

“I _noticed_ the lack of Tiny and Zig pigout sessions,” Lola said. “One of the waitresses keeps asking me when the boy from my school with the nice arms is coming back. I think she _might_ have a crush.”

Tiny flexed his biceps and smiled. “You mean a crush on me, right?”

Lola giggled. “Yeah, sure,” she said. “You’re welcome back at the Cantina anytime, just as long as you keep your fists to yourself.” 

“Deal,” Tiny held out his hand for Lola to shake. 

After the two shook hands, Lola spotted a couple climbing out of a table with a booth, leaving their trash on the table and walking away. “Well, we’ll have to clear the junk, but it looks like that table’s up for grabs.” She pointed the table out to Tiny quickly, hoping to snag it before someone else slipped in.

“I’ll go claim it,” Tiny offered. “That is, if you don’t mind being left alone for a few minutes…”

“I guess I can handle it. I need to rest my feet a little longer anyway. They’re still _killing_ me…”

Tiny gave Lola a thumbs up. “Just come over once Shay comes back with the food, it’ll take me a minute to clear all that trash and wipe the table down anyway.” 

Lola nodded in agreement. “Shay’s lucky to have a boyfriend that’s such a _gentleman,_ ” she said. “Not as lucky as I am to have Miles, of course, but…maybe I’m just a _little_ biased.” 


	49. Chapter 49

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola opens up to Miles about her worries. Miles has a surprise in store.

By the time the food was ready, Miles still hadn’t returned. Lola was starting to get a little anxious wondering where he was. She honestly hated being apart from him at all these days, even just for a short amount of time. She wasn’t used to feeling like this, all _clingy_ to someone. It wasn’t that Lola didn’t still crave her own space sometimes, but the further she got into her pregnancy, the more she hated being alone and the more she worried about something, _anything,_ going wrong...especially since that car accident. Like she’d told Frankie, she felt like a volcano these days, always bracing herself for the next mess.

“Here it is…” Lola looked at the pregnancy tracker app on her phone in one hand while dipping a pretzel piece in nacho cheese sauce in the other. “Braxton Hicks — _tight muscle contractions that help you practice for labor._ I’m pretty sure that’s what I felt in the store.” She furrowed her brows, then continued with a mouthful of cheese pretzel, “Why do I need to _practice_ for labor? How the heck do you practice shoving a whole human out of you?”

“I’m pretty sure it doesn’t mean _literally_ practice,” Shay said, taking a bite of pretzel. “It’s like...your _body_ naturally preparing for it. Your uterus, or...I dunno.” Despite being an A+ science student and her mother being a doctor, Shay was still just as clueless about all of this pregnancy stuff as the rest of them. If it weren’t for the internet, Lola would be completely lost.

Tiny set a cinnamon stick pretzel down, seeming to be losing his appetite. “Guess I missed _that_ health class lesson.”

“Yeah, and I missed the birth control one, so…” Lola tried to crack a joke, but it seemed to fly over both Shay and Tiny’s heads. She tapped her feet antsily, “What is _taking_ Miles so long…?”

 _“Speak of the handsome devil._ _”_ Before Lola even had a chance to turn around, Miles planted a kiss on top of her blue head. “Hi,” he smiled, taking a seat next to her and helping himself to a pretzel. “Sorry for taking forever. I couldn’t remember the pin on Frankie’s card, so I had to call her, and then the cribs were a real pain to load into the car…”

“No, no, it’s okay,” Lola assured him. “I was just getting worried you had been like, _kidnapped_ or crushed by the crib box or something.” She scooched closer to him, letting out a slight groan as the baby kicked hard at her ribs again. “Remember when we couldn’t _wait_ to feel the baby kick? I think I’m over it.”

Shay laughed under her breath. “I’m pretty relieved to be child-free again after that robo-baby assignment. No offense, Lo.”

Lola put the pretzel piece down, suddenly not so hungry anymore after being reminded of the _other_ reason she’d been in major need of retail therapy: the project grade. She still hadn’t said anything to Miles about it...she just couldn’t shake the horrible feeling that this grade was confirmation of her worst fears, that she was an idiot for even thinking they could raise a baby. If she couldn’t be trusted with a _toy,_ how could she be trusted with their _real_ baby? Looking at cute clothes had been a nice distraction, sure, but no amount of shopping or pretzels could make Lola’s worries disappear. 

Miles put his arm around Lola, always somehow immediately able to sense when something was off. “You good?” 

Before Lola could even attempt to fake a smile, Tiny interjected, “I’m _so_ glad I didn’t completely screw me and Shay’s grade up. The last thing I need is for Cal Tech to reject me because of some useless home ec. assignment-” He glanced at Lola, quickly adding, “No offense.”

Lola tried to resist the urge to roll her eyes. _Why_ did everyone keep feeling the need to add ‘no offense?’ “Why would I be offended?” she said, a bit more defensive than she’d intended. “It’s just a dumb project. It doesn’t _mean_ anything.” She shoved a piece of pretzel in her mouth, now just feeling like stress eating. 

Miles eyed his girlfriend with more concern now. “Are you _sure_ you’re alright?” 

Before Lola knew it, she felt the words coming out faster than she could think. “I’m _fine._ I just don’t want to talk about the stupid project, okay?!” she snapped.

Shay, Tiny, and Miles all froze with startled faces. Lola looked down, her cheeks flushed with embarrassment as she felt her eyes get watery. Once again, she felt like she was completely at the mercy of these roller coaster hormones. She hated not being able to fully control her emotions — she hated not being able to control _anything_ these days. “Sorry, I just…I...” 

Shay reached into her purse and handed Lola a tissue, while Tiny put one of his cinnamon pretzel sticks in front of Lola, mouthing, _help yourself._ Miles rubbed her back, his deep green eyes brimming with worry, “Lo, what’s going on? Talk to me.”

Lola took the tissue from Shay’s hand and blotted her teary eyes with it, thankful she’d at least been smart enough to invest in waterproof mascara. She took a deep breath before looking her boyfriend in the eye. “I failed the project,” Lola finally said. “I mean, I didn’t _totally_ fail. But...a C-?! Even Frankie and Esme got a better grade! What does that say about the kind of mom I’m gonna be? Mr. Mitchell may as well have written ‘ _totally incompetent’_ on my paper.” 

Miles just sat there, totally silent. He was still rubbing Lola’s back, but his lips weren’t moving. He just stared straight ahead, his expression impossible to read. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” Lola said, cautiously reaching for Miles’ hand. _Was he mad?_ “I should have told you. I just didn’t want to completely freak you out and…”

But then Miles snapped out of his stupor. “It’s my fault,” he said. 

Lola was totally confused. “What...what do you mean?”

“The robo-baby…” Miles sighed. “I didn’t tell you because I also didn’t want you to freak, but...that day you left it at my house, I dropped it coming down the stairs. It was completely stupid, I was carrying my laundry basket at the same time and the thing just — anyway, Hunter promised to hack into it and fix it, but I guess it didn’t work and...god, I’m _really_ sorry, Lo.”

Lola sat there for a second, absorbing this. Then, she just started laughing — laughing _hysterically._ “Miles, oh my _god_.”

Miles raised his eyebrow, looking confused. “You’re not mad…?”

“No!” Lola said, still cracking up. “I mean, maybe I should be a _little_. But, I was so worried the grade meant there was something wrong with me, that I was like, destined to be this horrible mother or…” She wiped one last tear from her eye, “Just promise me you won’t drop our _real_ baby down the stairs like that, okay? _Two hands!”_

Miles let out a sigh of relief. “Yeah, I can definitely promise that,” he said. He reached over for Lola’s hand and planted kisses on each of her fingers. Lola felt her muscles finally relax. She still felt worried and unprepared, but...she didn’t feel _completely_ helpless anymore. Or, at the very least, she knew there wasn’t something inherently wrong with her robo-baby parenting skills and that it wasn’t just her who had been dealing with these anxieties. 

Tiny put his arm around Shay, looking floored by the hormonal hurricane he’d just witnessed. “Have I mentioned how glad I am that we’re not having kids anytime soon?” he said to his girlfriend jokingly. “Because I _definitely_ almost dropped our robo-baby more than once.”

Lola flicked a pretzel crumb at Tiny. “Oh, hush,” she rolled her eyes. She looked to Miles, then back at Tiny, “ _Ahem._ Speaking of apologies...Tiny, isn’t there something you wanted to say?”

“Huh? Oh! Yeah, um…” Tiny started, seeming a bit flustered. He looked at Miles and cleared his throat, “Listen man, I’m...I’m sorry for coming at you at the Cantina like that a few months ago. I shouldn’t have butted in. You and Lola...you guys are good together.” He gave Miles a weak, but genuine smile. 

Miles returned the awkward smile. “Yeah, I think we are too,” he said, squeezing Lola’s hand a little tighter. “And I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have come at you either.”

Lola and Shay exchanged glances of relief. Lola had no doubt that Tiny’s heart had always been with Shay, but she did wonder if it had been weird for him at first to see her with another guy, the way it had taken _her_ forever to be genuinely happy for him and Shay. Lola was just glad they could all move past this now — she _definitely_ had enough drama in her life. “Now kiss and make up!” she teased Miles, making kissy faces at both him and Tiny.

All four teens laughed. Lola leaned against Miles’ chest and sighed contentedly — as far as double dates went, this wasn’t half bad after all.

….

After baby shopping and pretzel-eating had run its course, Miles and Lola split ways with Shay and Tiny, who were going to extend the afternoon by going to see some sappy rom-com. Popcorn sounded pretty good to Lola, but Miles insisted that he had a surprise that would be even better than popcorn with extra butter and slightly melty M&Ms. 

As they settled into Miles’ car and Lola struggled to get her seatbelt buckled, Miles turned to Lola. “Do you feel like today was…you know, productive?” he asked, eyeing Lola as she fumbled with her seatbelt. “Am I gonna need to get a seat belt extender?” he joked. 

Lola huffed, “You seriously might have to. I feel like I’m stretching this thing to its limit. Is it…tangled?” She twisted around awkwardly. There wasn’t much wiggle room in Miles’ so-called luxury car. 

Miles leaned over and grabbed the seatbelt, smoothing out a tangle that Lola hadn’t detected, freeing up much more space and allowing for Miles to properly buckle her seatbelt. It wasn’t comfortable, but it was buckled. After the fender bender scare, Lola and Miles weren’t taking any safety risks. “That better?” 

“Yeah, much better,” Lola said as she continued shifting around, trying her best to get comfortable. 

Miles started the car and put it in reverse. “So…productive day?” he called back to his earlier unanswered question.

“Yeah, definitely! We got two cribs, plus that goat hoodie that Frankie is gonna love!” Lola gushed. 

“You seem to be warming up to my dear sis,” Miles said. “Not that I’m campaigning for her or anything. I completely understand you being pissed.” 

“I’m feeling a little more like _letting go,”_ Lola admitted. “Like, Tiny and I had a good talk and it reminded me…life’s too short to hold grudges against people I really care about. My hurt over the situation is valid, yeah, but letting that hurt get in the way of important friendships…I don’t wanna do that. Especially now, with everything about to change in a few months…I want my true friends by my side.”

Miles raised an eyebrow. “That must’ve been _some_ talk.”

Lola chuckled. “Those thoughts had already been brewing. Talking to Franks, then Tiny, then our convo...I feel better about everything.” 

“I’m glad you say that,” Miles said, keeping his eyes on the road as he traveled the familiar streets of Toronto. “Because Frankie and I kinda secured a very special night for you — as long as you’re up for it…?” 

Lola perked up. “What’s this?” 

“Well, I know you’ve been missing being able to sleep over at my house, since our parents banned us from sleeping under the same roof…” Miles started. “If you’re warm enough on Frankie for a girls’ night, I’m sleeping over at Winston’s tonight, so…”

“Girls’ night?” Lola raised her brow. “Is the candy cane ice cream I left in your freezer still there?” 

“Right next to the peas,” Miles grinned. “Frankie made me check. It looks a bit freezer burned on the outside, but…”

“It’s the best that way!” 

Miles cracked a smile, looking over to Lola and locking eyes with her. 

“What?” Lola questioned his smile and glance, covering her blushing cheeks. 

“Frankie said you’d say that,” Miles said. “I just love you. That’s all.” 

Lola leaned over and kissed Miles on the cheek as they turned onto the road the Hollingsworths lived on. 

Miles reached into the backseat and handed over a few bags that Lola hadn’t noticed, still keeping his eyes on the road. “Open them,” he said. “I got you a few special things at the mall. Some for tonight, some…just for being you.”

Lola gasped at the unexpected presents. She opened up a grocery bag first and pulled out two avocados and a lime. 

“The avocados are for face masks, but I figured if you had some extra…maybe you’d wanna add something to make it taste a little better,” Miles explained, calling back to that fateful first girls’ night, which had nearly ended in disaster for Lola before she took a chance and went up to Miles’ room to work on the play. 

Lola knew that night that going up to his bedroom had a level of risk no matter what. She had tried fighting being attracted to Miles and as far as she could tell, he was fighting feelings too. She didn’t _want_ to be magnetized to Miles. It was _so_ much easier in theory if they just stayed friends, but once they finally got a chance to be truly alone and honest, away from judging eyes and without the pressure and weight of everything in the outside world…they just _worked._

Lola wiped tears from the corners of her eyes as she put the avocados and lime back in the grocery bag. Her hormones had made her cry over some _weird_ things. Lola wished she could say that this was the first time she’d cried over groceries, but if she said that she’d be lying. She set the grocery bag to the side and opened up a small bag from the baby store. As soon as she opened it and saw what was inside, she felt her eyes start to well up again. It was a small purple teddy bear wearing a tiny silver crown and a tiny t-shirt that read ‘my mommy is a princess’ in a beautiful silver embroidered script. 

“It made me think of you,” Miles said, parking in the Hollingsworth driveway and putting the car in park. He grabbed the last unopened bag off of Lola’s lap and pulled a small box out of it. 

“You’re not proposing, are you?” Lola blurted out. “Cause it’s not that I haven’t thought about it, but...” she admitted, then cupped her hands over her mouth. “I mean…” 

Miles laughed. “No,” he said, opening the box and revealing a silver charm bracelet with four charms. A tiny tiara, a sparkly cursive ‘L,’ a small heart with a pink gem in the middle and a charm with a tiny engraved baby foot. “These all made me think of you,” he said. “And I figured we could keep adding charms every year for the baby’s birthday. You know, if you like it…”

Suddenly, the extra time it had taken for Miles to get to the food court made sense. “Are you kidding?” Lola leaned over and showered her boyfriend in kisses. “Of course I love it! I love you!”

Miles accepted the affection with a big cheesy smile overtaking his features. “I don’t have a tiara for you yet, but you deserve it. You’ve been handling everything so well, Lola. I don’t wanna sound cheesy or like your dad or something, but...is it weird to say I’m proud of you? Because I am.”

Lola leaned over and kissed Miles on the lips, getting lost in him as her fingers wrapped around his hair. “I love you so much,” she gushed, feeling happy and secure and… _perfect._

A knock on the window interrupted their love session. Frankie was standing on the other side of the glass, already wearing the puppy pajamas Lola had gotten her for her fifteenth birthday. “Is girls’ night on or are you guys too busy bordering on hooking up in front of our house?” 

Lola laughed with her lips still on Miles’. “Five more minutes, then we’re on,” she answered Frankie, then shooed her off so that she and Miles could have a few more moments alone. For the first time in a long time, Lola felt hope that maybe, just maybe, everything was going to be fine after all. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for sticking with us this long! If you like this story, please consider leaving a review — we’d love to get more comments!


	50. Chapter 50

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola is finally ready to patch things up with Frankie, but finds herself having to entertain an unexpected conversation with another Hollingsworth first.

Following a minor make-out session in Miles’ car, Lola and Miles brought what they could carry from the car into the house. After sending Miles off to Winston’s with a kiss, Lola headed up to Frankie’s room. She held the tiny goat hoodie in one hand and the grocery bag with face mask supplies in the other. A girls’ night like this was past long overdue...like, _seven months_ overdue.

Overcome with bliss and excitement for the night ahead, Lola pranced up to Frankie’s room to officially make amends and commence their night of girls’ night fun. When turning a corner, however, she found herself nearly colliding with Mrs. Hollingsworth. 

“Oh! Hi, Mrs. Hollingsworth!” Lola attempted a cool greeting, despite being completely caught off guard. “Um, thank you so much for letting me sleep over tonight!” 

Mrs. Hollingsworth quickly scanned Lola from top to bottom — something Lola _really_ wished people would stop doing — before deciding on a response. “Thank Miles,” she said, eyes still fixated on Lola’s stomach. “It was all his idea.” She eyed the bags in Lola’s hands. “What did you two end up getting from the baby store? I don’t see many bags…” 

Lola looked down before holding up the only baby item she had brought upstairs, the goat hoodie. She sheepishly lifted the piece of clothing up for Mrs. Hollingsworth. “It’s…” Lola lifted the hood up and attempted a small smile. “A goat!” she chirped. She couldn’t help but notice that Mrs. Hollingsworth didn’t seem particularly impressed. 

“That’s not _all_ you got today…right?” Mrs. Hollingsworth’s face twisted into a sour expression. “I told Miles that you two _really_ need to get serious and start getting things together for this baby. Just look how far along you are, already in your _third trimester_ …” Her voice sounded stressed and tense, like they were in some group project together and Lola still hadn’t done her part, though this was admittedly _much_ higher stakes than any PowerPoint. 

Lola nervously shoved her hands along with the bags she was holding behind her back. _Now_ she sort of wished that Miles hadn’t left already. She could feel her stomach churning, and it wasn’t _just_ from the stress of this unexpected encounter. Her body had been feeling off for hours now — from the supposed Braxton Hicks contractions or _whatever_ was happening earlier to the way the pretzels from the mall never seemed to fully settle in her stomach…before Lola knew it, she felt and tasted warm pretzel chunks beginning to threaten their way back up her throat. 

“I need to…use the bathroom.” Lola quickly covered her mouth, dashing to the nearest toilet and emptying the contents of her stomach into it. 

Mrs. Hollingsworth quickly followed, seeming extremely concerned. She stood in the doorway of the bathroom, looking stiff and awkward. “Do you need me to fetch a cold rag or something?” 

Lola wiped her mouth on the back of her hand before standing up, steadying herself, and heading to the sink to rinse her mouth out and wash her hands. “No thanks,” Lola said. “Sorry about that, I just…” she paused, looking for somewhere other than the fancy embroidered decorative towels to dry her hands. 

“You don’t need to explain,” Mrs. Hollingsworth said quickly. She reached over and hastily grabbed one of the expensive-looking towels and offered it to her. Upon noticing Lola hesitate for a moment, Mrs. Hollingsworth offered the towel again. “Don’t worry, you won’t hurt the towels by drying your hands on them.”

Lola had admittedly always just dried her hands on her clothes whenever she used one of the Hollingsworth bathrooms in the past. She had made it a bit of a rule to never mess with anything that she didn’t think she could afford to replace. “They’re pretty,” Lola said quietly as she dried her hands off and returned the towel to Mrs. Hollingsworth.

“Believe it or not, I got these towels from my wedding all those years ago. They were at the top of my registry. I thought I _had_ to have them,” Mrs. Hollingsworth explained. “Our wedding day came and went and we finally got around to opening up presents, and you know what happened?” she folded the towel, unfolded it, then re-folded it, never taking her eyes off of Lola. 

“What?” Lola asked. 

“We got four sets of the same towels, all from different people,” Mrs. Hollingsworth cracked a smile — something that Lola hadn’t seen her do many times before — then hung the towel back up on the rack. “I still love the pattern, but…I wish I’d gotten four of something _else_ from my registry. Definitely would have served me better than these towels.”

Not knowing quite what to say, Lola forced a slight smile. “They’re really pretty…” she said, eyeing the doorway and trying to figure out a polite way to exit the conversation. 

Mrs. Hollingsworth leaned against the doorframe, still blocking the exit. “Lola…I’m sorry if I stressed you out before,” she said with a sigh. “I just...I want everything ready for when the baby comes. It’s hard enough to be prepared for a newborn when you’re a grownup, but god, a baby at your age...” She wiped a tear from the corner of her eye, something that admittedly caught Lola way off guard. “You and Miles are just _so_ young. You have no _idea_ how difficult this is going to be…”

Lola honestly had no idea how to respond to her boyfriend’s mother getting all emotional like this. Not knowing what else to do, she reached over for the same towel and offered it to Mrs. Hollingsworth to wipe her tears. “Would it make you feel better if I tell you we also got two cribs? One for the nursery here, one for my house. Two really cute colors,” Lola tried to give a reassuring smile. She really couldn’t blame Miles’ mom for being worried, especially considering she’d just had her _own_ little freak out a couple of hours ago. This baby tended to have that effect on everyone. 

“I think my dad can help assemble them,” Lola continued, knowing she was rambling a bit now. “Not that I don’t trust Miles to put a crib together, ‘cause he totally could, but you know, my dad is really good with projects...”

Mrs. Hollingsworth blotted her eyes one more time, then set the towel aside. “Actually, speaking of your father...I was hoping to arrange another dinner with all of us again soon. I think it’s long overdue. Miles tells me your mother is back in town also?”

Lola felt her stomach unsettle again. “Um...she’s moving back in a couple of weeks, yeah…” She’d been so distracted that she’d managed to mostly keep the upcoming stuff with her mom in the back of her head lately, but she obviously couldn’t do that forever. 

“Fantastic — I’ll give your father a call,” Mrs. Hollingsworth said, eyeing her up and down again. She gave Lola a polite smile and added, “Well, if you’re feeling alright, then I’ll let you get back to your sleepover. Enjoy your fun — you’re going to miss having time for these things.” She let out a small, friendly- _i_ _sh_ laugh, then disappeared down the hallway.

Lola knew Mrs. Hollingsworth meant well, but the way she said it still kind of rubbed her the wrong way. She knew her life was about to change forever— that much was undeniable at this point. Lola had to question though, did it _really_ mean no more fun at _all?_ Once Lola was sure she was alone, she glanced down at her bump and whispered, “So, how do you feel about girls’ nights?” She was pretty sure she’d be taking this baby to _plenty_ of sleepovers. There were definitely going to be some major perks of having her best friend be her baby’s aunt. 

….

Lola opened Frankie’s bedroom door without a knock. “I just had the _weirdest_ conversation with your mom,” she said, grabbing Frankie’s phone from her hand and tossing it into a pile of pillows. “I need to gab, so…girls’ night starts _now._ "

“What are you holding?” Frankie asked, pointing to the grocery bag Lola was still holding, which she had shoved the goat hoodie haphazardly into. “I see something _fluffy_.” 

Lola quickly turned around and pulled the avocados and lime out first, handing them to Frankie and quickly shoving the fluffy baby hoodie behind her back. “Face mask supplies, duh!” She smiled and added, “And…a lime, because your older brother is a dork.” 

“ _Both_ of my brothers are dorks,” Frankie tossed the produce to the side. “I don’t get the lime.” 

Lola sort of liked that she and Miles were the only two who knew the significance of the lime. She smiled for a moment recalling the earlier events of the afternoon.

“Can I have my debit card back now? Did you buy something cute?” Frankie’s voice cut in. “Did you buy out the whole store? Do I need to call my bank and report hundreds of dollars of fraud charges?” She covered her eyes with her fingers, seemingly increasingly anxious to see what Lola had purchased. 

Lola reached into her bag and pulled out Frankie’s card, handing it over. “Mint condition. Not even a dent from the _thousands_ I spent,” she teased. 

“I knew it!” Frankie let out a laugh before turning serious for a moment. “...you’re kidding, _right?”_

Finally feeling like she had both built up enough suspense _and_ tortured Frankie just the right amount, Lola pulled the grocery bag containing the goat hoodie from behind her back and threw it toward Frankie, barely missing her head with the toss. 

“Hey! Watch your…!” Frankie grabbed the bag and opened it, pulling the goat hoodie out and holding it up in all of its glory. “It’s a _goat!_ A tiny goat!” she squealed. “It’s the cutest thing I’ve ever seen!”

Lola grinned, “Just wait til you see the baby wearing it. I think I literally might _die_ that day.” Before she could say anything else, she was interrupted by a sharp kick,followed shortly by an _even sharper_ kick. “ _Oof_ ,” she said, holding her bump as she winced. “These kicks are like, worse than period cramps. How is that even _possible?”_

Frankie’s smile faded slightly as she directed her attention to Lola. “The baby is kicking?” she asked, eyebrows raised. Her gaze lingered on Lola’s bump for a second. “Would you mind if I…felt it?” 

Lola shrugged. “Sure,” she said. As soon as Frankie reached over to touch her bump though, Lola quickly retracted. “ _After_ ,” she said, “you get me a bowl of candy cane ice cream.” 

Frankie rolled her eyes. “Fine,” she said, getting off of her bed and holding up the tiny goat hoodie again. “But you better still be kicking when I get back!” She wiggled a finger at Lola’s belly before slipping on her bunny slippers and heading toward the door. “Anything else?” 

“From the kitchen? That’s a dangerous question to ask a pregnant girl who just puked her guts out.” 

“True,” Frankie agreed. “Ice cream, pickles, peanut butter crackers, frozen waffles, strawberries, pretzels…” She began listing off all of Lola’s top pregnancy cravings. 

“Oof, no pretzels…” Lola was suddenly reminded of the feeling of soggy pretzel chunks coming back up and nearly lost her appetite. “All of the above, plus Pop-Tarts. And _please_ bring the pickle jar too.” 

“ _N_ _o,_ ” Frankie protested. “I _cannot_ stomach watching you drink pickle juice again or _I’ll_ be the one who pukes my guts out.” 

“At least you’re not pregnant!” Lola said. “Pickle juice, please. Ooh! And _popcorn!_ We’ll need that for our _Mamma Mia_ marathon. I’ll take it as an official and final apology for _driving while high.”_

Lola bringing up the reason behind their previous conflict was seemingly enough to convince Frankie to stop resisting. “I’ll be right back,” Frankie said begrudgingly. “I’m gonna have to enlist Hunter to carry all these snacks…” she mumbled under her breath. 

“Bring a bowl for face masks too!” Lola chirped. She settled into Frankie’s bed comfortably, putting her feet up and resting her hands on her belly, still feeling the kicks. “I’ll get the movies set up!” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We have ideas for where the story is going, but we'd love more feedback — what do you guys want to see more of in this story? Any particular character/ship dynamics or scenes you want more of? Let us know in the comments!


	51. Chapter 51

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola and Frankie fully reconnect at their girls’ night.

Frankie was more than relieved that Lola had shown up and agreed to having a girls’ night. When Miles had called and suggested the idea, she was convinced there was _no way_ Lola would go for it. After all, Lola freezing her out for more than a week was literally the longest the two had gone without talking or hanging out since...well, since Frankie froze _her_ out over the pregnancy bombshell all those months ago. Frankie was over freezing out and fighting...she just wanted her best friend back, especially now with everything about to change in a couple of months. She wanted to be there for Lola every step of the way like she’d promised.

“The whole kitchen, coming up…” Frankie mumbled to herself, walking towards one of the cabinets and reaching on her tippy toes to open it. “I know you’re in there somewhere…” she said, referring to the fancy charcuterie tray that her mother only brought out for special occasions. It was white marble with scalloped edges — pretty, but sort of outdated. She knew that Lola would like the _fanciness_ of it all, especially when the main event of the night was going to consist of vegging out in front of various rom-coms that they could practically quote by heart. 

Frankie’s fingers barely grasped the edge of _something_ — the cabinet was too high for her to really see. Frankie adjusted her grip and carefully pulled whatever she was holding down, hoping for the best. 

The charcuterie tray was safely in Frankie’s hand, but a stained glass platter that was stacked on top of the tray crashed to the floor, shattering at her feet. 

“Shit!” Frankie exclaimed, stepping back carefully to ensure she didn’t step on any glass. She was now _extremely_ glad that she slipped her bunny slippers on before heading downstairs. She carefully stepped over the shattered stained glass and sighed. “What a waste...” she muttered, searching for a broom to sweep the mess up. 

After cleaning up her mess, Frankie set the charcuterie tray on the counter and began the process of setting it up, trying to figure out spacing and placement for the variety of weird snacks her pregnant best friend requested. “Should the pop-tarts go next to the peanut butter crackers? _No,_ that just sounds wrong…” Frankie spoke out loud to nobody in particular. Suddenly she wished she had a companion, something like a cat or a dog or something to talk to when she was on her own — that way she’d at least feel a _little_ less crazy talking to herself. Plus, she knew Esme loved cats.

As she began arranging the food, Frankie started to wonder if she and Lola were officially _made up_ or not. She was pretty optimistic considering the fact that Lola had accepted her invitation and come into her room ready to gossip, but some things still felt like they were hanging in the air. Frankie knew that there was still likely another serious conversation and another round of apologies ahead, but she felt _ready_ this time. Ready to conquer her anxiety surrounding admitting she was wrong — something that likely stemmed from her fear of disappointing her parents — and ready to hold herself completely accountable for her stupid choices. It was honestly kind of… _weird_ for Frankie to notice her own growth in real time. A year or two ago, there was no _way_ she could have been as self-aware as she was now. 

It took about ten minutes, but Frankie _finally_ crammed a little bit of everything Lola had requested into one _really bizarre_ looking charcuterie board _._ It definitely didn’t look like anything her mother had ever served on the same tray, but she hoped Lola would love it. She carried the tray, a pint of candy cane ice cream, and a jar of pickles, and headed back upstairs to her room, ready for the night.

She made it up the stairs and set the assortment of items on the floor so she could open the bedroom door — she’d considered just knocking, but it seemed too mean to make a seven-months-pregnant girl get out of bed for that. As she reached for the doorknob, she overheard Lola talking in a quiet voice, gabbing away to someone. _Sheesh,_ Frankie thought — were Lola and Miles really _so_ clingy they couldn’t go two seconds without being on the phone with each other? 

But when Frankie opened the door, Lola wasn’t on the phone. “Who were you talking to?” Frankie asked, certain she’d heard Lola talking to _someone._ _Was she going crazy?_

Lola’s cheeks flushed with pink as she sat up, almost totally hidden by her bump at this point. “Umm…” she seemed embarrassed. “Okay, don’t judge me, but sometimes I do this _thing..._ I just talk to the baby. That app says it’s good for bonding and like, building a _connection._ Kinda weird, I know.”

Frankie walked closer, setting the tray down on the table beside her bed. “That’s not weird,” she said. “At least, not _as_ weird as just talking to yourself…” She thought back to moments earlier when she was mumbling to herself in the kitchen. “Do you mind if I…” she asked, motioning toward the empty space on the bed. 

“It’s _your_ bed,” Lola reminded her as she scooted over, making more room for Frankie to sit. 

“I know, but I didn’t wanna assume…you know, because…” Frankie trailed off. She didn’t want to ruin the vibe by bringing up their drama, but she also didn’t want to just act like everything was fine if Lola was still upset. “I’m glad you’re here tonight, I just wanna make sure…that we’re _cool?”_

Lola seemed to think for a moment before suddenly wincing and placing her hand on her abdomen. “Geez, stop kicking my ribs!” she scolded her bump. “Do you wanna see something cool?” Lola asked Frankie, derailing the conversation on accident.

“First I wanna know if _we’re_ cool,” Frankie said. “You know, if that’s cool.”

“Yes, we’re _cool_ ,” Lola confirmed. “Yeah, I was pissed for awhile, but...my baby needs their Aunt Frankie and I really need my best friend by my side through all of this.” The two exchanged a glance for a quick second, then Lola’s attention returned to the baby kicking. “ _Now_ do you wanna see something cool?” she asked. 

Frankie allowed a smile to overtake her features as she nodded. She was _so_ glad and relieved to have confirmation that Lola wasn’t mad at her anymore. It was driving her crazy to be kept at arms’ length from her best friend, especially at a time when Lola needed her friends the most. And truthfully, Frankie didn’t do well with people being mad at her in general. “Yes, show me the cool thing,” she entertained Lola’s offer.

When Lola pulled up her shirt to expose her belly, Frankie was shocked at how much it had grown just recently. The last time she had seen Lola’s exposed bump was the night of the ravine party, which wasn’t more than two weeks earlier. Frankie didn’t think she would ever get used to seeing this big belly on Lola’s tiny frame, especially knowing it was her own niece or nephew growing in there. She and Lola really _were_ family now, and it was awesome and totally weird at the same time.

“The cool thing isn’t the stretch marks, btdubs,” Lola ran her fingers over the stretched skin on her stomach. “I’ve been using cocoa butter, but they’re still… _ugh,”_ she sighed, rubbing her belly for a moment before Frankie noticed her face lighting up. 

“This! Feel it!” Lola quickly grasped Frankie’s wrist and placed her palm on a spot near her belly button. 

There was a soft kneading sensation through Lola’s skin. A tiny arm or leg was slowly gliding across the surface of Lola’s bump from the other side, making her entire belly shift around. Frankie could actually feel and _see_ her little niece or nephew _moving_ inside the womb _._ “That’s…” Frankie was speechless. She felt the sensation again, looking closer and feeling completely _amazed…_ and a little freaked out at the same time, honestly. 

“I know it’s weird, but isn’t it also kind of…beautiful?” Lola said, tracing her finger down the dark line that was beginning to show up at the top of her bump. She paused and let out a heavy sigh. “I keep feeling like things can’t feel more real…”

Frankie moved her hand from Lola’s stomach and placed it on her shoulder. “You good, Lo?” 

“Yeah, it’s just…” Lola pulled up her shirt. “I’m really about to have a _baby._ It keeps hitting me, you know? I was talking to your mom today and she said I was going to _miss being able to have fun._ I think she thinks your brother and I aren’t taking this whole thing seriously enough.”

“My mom doesn’t know what she’s talking about,” Frankie instinctively felt the need to defend Lola. She knew her mother kind of had a point, though. This baby really was going to change everything, even just at the Hollingsworth house. Frankie tried to picture Miles rocking a screaming newborn back and forth at the table while the rest of them tried to eat breakfast...she just _couldn’t._ That didn’t seem like a very helpful thing to say right now though, so instead Frankie just added, “Look, whatever, even if she’s right and you guys are totally unprepared, I’ve literally never seen Miles this happy. He loves you, Lo, a _lot._ If either of you were in this situation with anyone else, I’d be really worried, but you two...you just _work._ ”

Lola slowly formed a smile. “Well, look at you, becoming our biggest shipper,” she teased.

“Let’s not go _that far,”_ Frankie laughed, but it was true she really had finally warmed to their relationship. It took a long time to understand, but now she honestly couldn’t picture them with anyone but each other. “And...me and Esme? What do you think of us being a thing? You know I told my dad and the reporters a couple of weeks ago, right? It was _nuts_.”

“Did your dad like, totally freak out?” Lola asked, easily engaged by Frankie unloading more gossip. “I think you and Esme are cute. If she makes you happy, I’m here for it.” Her eyes scanned the food Frankie had brought. “You two seem to like… _work_ in a weird, unexpected way,” she traced her fingers over her bump, adding, “Speaking of _unexpected…_ ”

Frankie nodded. “It was _definitely_ unexpected,” she said. “I didn’t think I wanted to be Esme’s friend at first, let alone her _girlfriend…”_ The word slipped off Frankie’s tongue more casually every time she said it. “But I’m really happy around her. She doesn’t make me act like a crazy person, like I have with literally every boyfriend ever.” 

“You and Winston weren’t _too_ dramatic,” Lola said. “But you and him are _definitely_ better off as friends.” 

A buried memory came to the forefront of Frankie’s brain. “Yeah, you’re right. The most dramatic thing that ever happened between Winston and I was when _you kissed him_ ,” she teased, admittedly knowing she was kind of omitting that whole Logan guy mess and her last-minute ditching Winston for Jonah. Sometimes Frankie wondered if she was truly capable of a drama-free relationship...so far, she and Esme seemed to be off to a pretty good start. Then again, Frankie had already literally crashed her girlfriend’s car...

“ _He_ kissed _me!_ ” Lola defended herself immediately, then joined Frankie in laughter. “God, I forgot about that! I’m _so_ glad we aren’t clueless grade nines anymore.”

“We’ve grown a lot since then,” Frankie agreed. She glanced at Lola’s belly and added with a smirk, “In more ways than one.” 

Frankie’s eye caught a framed photo from her fifteenth birthday party, which felt like a lifetime ago. It was a sepia-toned photo of her and Lola making silly faces in ‘20s garb posing next to the pony that Frankie had paid for with her father’s credit card. “By my seventeenth birthday, Esme and I will be getting ready to celebrate our three-month anniversary,” Frankie said, her mind wandering back to an old _Gilmore Girls_ episode that had firmly cemented the importance of the milestone in her brain as a 13-year-old. “And you’ll be about ready to _pop…_ ” She made a _pop_ sound with her mouth to be extra dramatic.

“Ugh, don’t remind me. I’m _terrified_.” Lola apparently couldn’t resist the food any longer, quickly plucking a few strawberries and biting into one of them. She was quiet for a second, then added, “Is it okay to say I was kinda surprised that you’re _dating_ Esme? I support it all the way, but…I wasn’t expecting it to go _that way.”_

“I wasn’t at first either,” Frankie admitted. “But I _really_ like her,” she said, then quickly felt the need to clarify, “ _Like that,_ I mean.”

“I’m familiar with _bisexuality,_ Franks,” Lola teased with strawberry juice dripping from her chin. She quickly wiped her chin before continuing, “Like I told your brother, I’m totally cool with it,” she said. “I just didn’t know you were bi too.”

“I didn’t either,” Frankie shrugged. “At least, I _think_ that’s what I am…?” _Bisexual_ seemed to fit best and make sense, but this whole _identity_ stuff was all still so new and kind of scary. “Sometimes, I guess you don’t quite know until you meet someone who…opens you up to the possibility,” Frankie felt her cheeks get slightly warm as she thought about Esme and how their romance had slowly bloomed from an unexpected friendship. “At a certain point when I looked at her, I couldn’t pretend I didn’t want to kiss her anymore. I’ve thought girls were _pretty_ before, but with Esme…” 

“It’s more than that?” Lola finished Frankie’s thought accurately. “Trust me, I can tell,” she laughed slightly, reaching for another strawberry and tossing it in the bowl of partially-melted candy cane ice cream that Frankie had brought up. “I like you and Esme together,” Lola said. “Despite the fact that you two are both _drama_ , you balance one another out nicely.”

Frankie grinned, grabbing a small pillow and threatening to toss it at Lola. “I could say the same for you and my _bro,”_ she teased. 

Lola reached over and grabbed the pillow from Frankie’s hand. “No pillow fights!” she warned. “At least not til’ I finish my ice cream. I don’t wanna spill a drop of my candy cane ice cream. It won’t be in stores again ‘til Christmas!” 

“You’ll have a _six-month-old_ by then,” Frankie realized with a slight gasp, the idea still seeming so unreal. They’d have a little baby Hollingsworth watching them decorate the tree, almost _crawling_ by then. “Due at the end of June, right?”

“Right after prom and your birthday,” Lola nodded. She set her bowl of ice cream aside and moved her hand back to her bump, seeming to pause and think. “You know...it’s crazy this all started with a game of truth or dare on what was supposed to be a girls’ night. I probably never would have gone up to Miles’ room that night if Shay and I hadn’t been fighting about Tiny…” She let out a sigh, “I don’t regret anything, but...I’m _really_ scared, Franks.” 

“I know,” Frankie said. She was afraid too, in a way — for Lola and her brother, but also just about how different things were going to be for all of them. She wrapped her arms around Lola’s shoulders and gave them a squeeze. “Still up for _Mamma Mia_? On the bright side...at least you _know_ who the father is.”

Lola cracked up and tossed the pillow at Frankie. “At _least!”_ she giggled, moving over to make more room for Frankie and the mountain of food she had brought. “Now, is this gonna be a sing-a-long, or…?” 

Frankie smiled. “Let’s do it,” she said, snagging the remote and pressing play before settling in next to Lola. There was no doubt a _lot_ was changing...she just hoped there would still be time for girls’ nights before _and_ after the eventful summer ahead. 


	52. Chapter 52

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lola receives unsettling news. Some familiar faces appear at the Cantina.

The next morning, Frankie dropped Lola off at the Cantina for her morning shift. It was bright and early, but the place was already packed with customers demanding frittatas and breakfast burritos. Lola spotted her father clearing tables across the room and approached him with a skip in her step, actually feeling pretty refreshed and ready to face the day for once.

“¡Buenos días!” Lola chirped, tapping her father on the shoulder. “How was your night without me?” She took her folded apron from her overnight bag and layered it over the oversized dark blue sweatshirt she had snagged from the laundry basket outside of Miles’ bedroom, then pulled her name tag out from the front pocket of her apron and pinned it on. 

“It was fine,” Lola’s father answered quickly, not looking up as he cleared a table. “Your mother and I missed you,” he said. “ _Again._ ”

Lola frowned, a bit thrown off by his grumpy demeanor. “I know, but...you said it was okay to sleep over if Miles was gone…” She scanned the crowd, noticing a few customers already staring at her. She wished she could say she was used to the judgy glances by now, but they honestly still made her self-conscious — apparently even her boyfriend’s hoodie and an apron couldn’t completely cover up the obvious now. 

Her father kept his eyes focused on wiping the table, which was already nearly spotless. “And you’re _late…_ ” 

“Five minutes! What’s the big deal?” Lola shot back, not understanding her father’s attitude. “I had a great night with Frankie, not that you asked…” 

“Have you clocked in yet?” her father responded simply. 

Lola trudged away to quickly punch her time card before returning to her father and placing a hand on her hip. “What’s going on?” she asked, grabbing the spray bottle he was using to clean up from the table and demanding her father's undivided attention. 

Lola’s father looked up, focusing his eyes on her neck and squinting. “It looks like you still spent a lot of time with _Miles_ …” he pointed to a tiny purple spot on her neck that she had tried her best to conceal. “Do I need to call Frankie’s mother and confirm that you didn’t skip out on dinner with your mother and me to see your boyfriend again?” 

“No!” Lola gasped. She pulled her hoodie up slightly, feeling her cheeks blush. _Damn Frankie’s concealer for being three shades too pale._ “Only Franks was home for the sleepover, I pinky swear! Geez, whatever happened to _trusting_ me?” Lola knew she was probably going to regret asking that last part as soon as it slipped out.

Her father shook his head, muttering something under his breath in Spanish. “You’re kidding, right?” 

Lola crossed her arms, placing them on top of her bump before sighing. “What’s the deal?” she asked. “I’m sorry I missed dinner with Mom again, but…” 

“I don’t have time for this right now, Mija,” Lola’s father cut her off, holding his hand out for her to hand over the spray bottle. “Can you please get to work in the kitchen?” he said. “ _Now?”_

Lola was tempted to continue her resistance, but reluctantly handed the bottle over. “Fine,” she said. “But just so you know, we got two cribs at the mall. Miles is planning on bringing the one for our house over tonight. That is, if he’s _allowed._..” She allowed herself to get a bit of an attitude with her father — it seemed only fair considering how cross and closed off he was acting.

Lola walked away before her father could respond, but it honestly didn’t seem like he had anything to say anyway. _So much for her good mood._ She made her way towards the back, feeling the baby kicking again. She honestly hated working in the kitchen — it was tiny and hot and she much preferred to be out in the main dining room interacting with customers. Lately though, everyone seemed to want to stick her back there, out of sight. Nobody had ever outright said it, but Lola got the feeling having a pregnant teenage waitress wasn’t exactly great for a family establishment’s image, especially one _named_ after her.

As soon as Lola was out of her father’s earshot, she turned to the nearest Cantina employee to get the scoop. “What’s the deal with my dad?” she asked Lautaro, who was standing in the kitchen, checking the finished plates before they went out to the customers. 

Lautaro didn’t look up as he fixed a rogue piece of cilantro. “You’re late,” he said simply. “And the floor needs mopping.” 

“Not until someone fills me in on why my dad is being such a sourpants!” Lola insisted, knowing she was probably pushing it. “I know I’m not usually late, but he’s not usually so… _so_...” She froze, trying to think of a word that wouldn’t get her sent home without pay. “ _Mean!”_ she settled on.

Lautaro still didn’t look up, seeming to also be in a mood. “Like I said, floor needs mopping. _Andale_.”

Lola shook her head and reluctantly grabbed the mop. “Sure, make the pregnant girl clean the floor…” she grumbled under her breath. She mopped for a second, then turned back to Lautaro, still itching for answers. She could never seem to leave these things alone, especially when it came to potential Cantina drama or gossip. “You know, I work here too. It would be nice if _somebody_ would keep me in the loop…”

Lautaro finally looked up, seemingly annoyed enough to give in. “First, drop the attitude,” he said sternly. He was like a Tio to Lola, having known her since she was two-feet tall, meaning he wasn’t afraid to _put her in her place_ a bit occasionally. “Now, as for your father…” He paused for a moment, biting his lip. “Someone appears to have broken in last night. No major damage, but there’s a large sum of cash missing. _That_ might have something to do with it.”

Lola dropped the mop to the ground, completely caught off guard and shocked by that answer. “Wait, what? Like, someone _robbed_ us?” She moved her hands down to her stomach, suddenly feeling nauseous, and not just from her pregnancy. She was genuinely shaken. Nothing like this had ever happened at the Cantina before as far as she knew. “What...what happened?” 

“Still trying to figure that out,” Lautaro said. “Your father called the police early this morning to investigate and they’ve asked the security company to review the footage from the past few days...”

“I don’t understand... _how_ could this have happened?” Lola questioned, suddenly feeling a sense of guilt for not being around the Cantina more — not that she could’ve really prevented anything like this from happening, but _still…_ this place was like her second home. The thought of some creep busting in here...she didn’t even want to imagine it. She tried to focus her attention back to mopping the floor, but she was still in shock. “Don’t we have like, locks and alarms for this stuff?”

Lautaro eyed Lola before picking up a plate and handing it to one of the waitresses who was loading her arms with hot plates. “It seems your father forgot to lock up on his way out last night,” he said with a slightly lowered tone. “Over ten years of business and he’s never done that _once._ I think he’s just got too much on his mind these days...” His gaze lingered on Lola for a brief second, then returned to the plates.

“How much money did we...” Lola’s face fell as she clocked Lautaro’s expression, taking that as his answer. Financial troubles were just another thing she and her dad didn’t need in general, but _especially_ now. “I guess now I get why my dad’s grumpy…” she trailed off, not knowing what else to say. 

The baby started kicking again, hard, like it was picking up on her stress. Lola turned back to Lautaro with her best puppy dog eyes, “Can I _please_ wait tables this morning instead? The kitchen is really stuffy…” She was tempted to take her hoodie off but that would mean a)making her baby bump a million times more obvious and b)possibly having everyone at the Cantina give her crap over the hickey she’d _thought_ she’d concealed.

“Fine,” Lautaro agreed surprisingly quickly. “But only because we’re busy...and only two tables at a time.” 

Lola handed Lautaro the mop with a grin, wiping the sweat from underneath her blue bangs. She _hated_ being stuck in the kitchen and her father knew that good and well. Today of all days, she really needed the distraction of customers. 

“Gracias,” Lola said with a sigh of relief. “See you later, Lautaro!” She gave him finger guns before returning to the front dining room, trying to hide that she was still shaken up. Putting on a brave face was about all she could do these days.

…

The first table Lola was assigned was full of familiar faces. Yael, Hunter, Vijay, and Baaz were all seated outside with their laptops. 

“If it isn’t our missing vlogger!” Yael’s eyes lit up when they saw Lola approach the table. “We were just about to start an All Inclusive meeting without you. I texted you a reminder, but I never heard back from you.”

“Crap! I’ve been so busy, I just _totally_ spaced...I’m sorry,” Lola responded, flipping open the order pad. “I promise I’ll email you my video pitches for the month by tonight — tomorrow at the latest…” All of her responsibilities had really been piling up recently. As much as she loved vlogging, she was beginning to wonder how much longer she could sustain her extracurricular activities, given that things were only going to get _way_ more difficult from here on out.

“You’re the member of All Inclusive with the most views, yet you upload the least,” Hunter pointed out. 

Vijay cut in, “Yeah, I’m totally jelly. If I had your interaction, I’d be posting three times a _week!”_

“More like three times a day,” Baaz added dryly. Vijay shrugged, indicating that Baaz was probably right despite the snark. 

“If you need help with video ideas or anything else…” Yael began to offer. They were always far too charitable. From the camera setups to the editing and uploading, Yael and Hunter pretty much took care of everything behind the scenes. 

Coming up with video ideas and being in front of the camera were pretty much the only two responsibilities that Lola held when it came to the vlog channel at this point. Taking any more help would basically turn her into a puppet being fed lines, and that wasn’t really her _vibe._ She liked still having _some_ control over her own image, after all.

“Are you guys ready to order? Any appetizers? Drinks?” Lola tried to change the subject and get back to the task at hand. She _did_ supposedly have one more table to serve, after all. “The new nachos are really-” Lola paused and held her stomach, wincing as she felt another one of those tight contraction things, the Braxton- _whatever. “Oof…”_ she groaned.

“Are you okay?” Yael asked with concern. The others just stared with blank teenage boy faces.

“Fine, yeah...” Lola sighed. The feeling was passing. Still though, it wasn’t exactly convenient to feel these weird little contractions when she was supposed to be taking orders at work. Lola knew that this was supposed to be her body _practicing for labor_ or whatever, but now was _not_ the time to practice. She was beginning to think she almost preferred the now-familiar churn of morning sickness. “Um, so, anything to start?”

Baaz cut in, “I hope you and Miles are being cautious, Lola.” He eyed Lola up and down, continuing, “You are aware that _certain things_ can induce early labor, right? Spicy foods, aerobic activity, sexual intercourse-” 

Yael whacked his hand before he could finish his sentence. “I’ll take a Shirley Temple, please! With a straw!”

Lola didn’t even have time to be properly embarrassed or go off on Baaz for being such a doofus. She just kept her eyes to her order pad with flushed cheeks, even though she secretly wanted nothing more than to whack him over the head with it. “Anyone else…?”

Hunter cleared his throat but avoided making eye contact with Lola. “Can I get…an order of nachos?” He was always so _awkward_ around her these days, even more so since accidentally seeing her in her bra the night of the ravine party. “With extra cheese and pickled jalapeños.” His usual order. 

“Uh, I’ll have the same,” Vijay shrugged quietly, seeming to observe the awkwardness. “With a side of sour cream.”

“Bring me whatever the special of the day is,” Baaz said with a smile, either blissfully unaware of the slight discomfort in his current social surroundings or just simply unbothered by it. “And put extra cheese on it too — I don’t care what it is. And bring a salt shaker, please!”

“One Shirley Temple, two orders of nachos with extra cheese and pickled jalapeños, and an order of _Provoleta_ with _extra cheese_ for Baaz coming up…” Lola said, scribbling down their orders on her order pad. Provoleta was a dish made basically entirely out of provolone cheese. If he insisted on ordering the _special,_ the last thing Baaz needed was _extra_ cheese. She was going to let him find that out when the food arrived, though, since he claimed he didn’t care. Lola usually tried not to be _too_ petty, but Baaz made it so _easy_ with his stupid comments… 

Lola took a deep breath and turned around, heading back to the kitchen. She noticed her feet were starting to ache in her work shoes. If only she could wear her fuzzy slippers to work… 

“Lola!” Baaz called out, startling her. “Don’t forget the salt!”

Lola rolled her eyes and continued back to the kitchen to put their order in. She just wanted _one day_ where she didn’t feel like a freakshow. That day sure didn’t seem to be coming anytime soon, though.

**Author's Note:**

> We have absolutely nothing against the abortion storyline in canon, this is just an AU we started for fun.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Defender of the Undefended](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25659298) by [NotoriousReign](https://archiveofourown.org/users/NotoriousReign/pseuds/NotoriousReign)
  * [Project Shakespeare](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27070474) by [NotoriousReign](https://archiveofourown.org/users/NotoriousReign/pseuds/NotoriousReign)
  * [Aslan is Jesus and Here's Why](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27636418) by [NotoriousReign](https://archiveofourown.org/users/NotoriousReign/pseuds/NotoriousReign)
  * [The Power of Baby Grinch](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28348038) by [NotoriousReign](https://archiveofourown.org/users/NotoriousReign/pseuds/NotoriousReign)




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